Sperm Meets Egg Plan (SMEP) TTC#1 group Aug/Sept/Oct 2013

[beaglemom]

I went to the dr for my annual today & she told me to do every other day around ovulation...she didn't seem too keen on the every day plan. I am a little nerve racked now because I have not had my +opk yet & I am on cd16. I usually have no issue getting a +. I am starting a log in a day planner but didn't do it last month. Bu I think it was around cd16 last month too. Just thinking too much. We are on cycle 2 after taking a long break of ttc. We tried for a while before our break. So this is a new start for us. trying to get in a positive mode.

 

[MIZZYD]

Add me to the list, CD1 today.

 

[SCgirl]

@MrsWKJ - yeah, the last two cycles I didn't get a "true" positive (I'd get close) with OPK's, but my temps had the rise that seemed to make it look like I O'd. So, maybe? haha

@beaglemom - for 30 days, fertilityfriend lets you log any info in addition to your temps/cycle like different pains, meds taken, stress, etc for free (after 30 days you have to pay for all the specific info, but notes and charting temps are still free) - which is handy b/c you always have access to it on your phone or computer! (I've tried hand-writing logs, but seem to do a good job forgetting about them!) good luck!

 

[floridasian]

CD8 today - we started BD'ing last night. Also started OPK testing on Sunday. I'm taking all my good vitamins & fertile CM, drinking grapefruit juice and pomegranate juices, eating lots of fruits and veggies, and TONS of water. Feeling very positive and excited about this cycle!

By the way how do you hold it for 2-4 hours for OPK testing when you have to drink 8 glasses of water per Fertile CM instructions? Seems like an impossibility!

 

[beaglemom]

Finally got a spike on the clear blue monitor, not a peak. But me and husband seem to be in a funk. Don't know if we can get the deed done. I am just in a down mood.

 

[Marqelle93]

I have been in that situation. You just need to talk to him and talk it out all the way until the end, until you feel better...that always makes me feel more romantic rather than "horny"...when I have long talks with my husband about my feelings.

 

[beaglemom]

We are going to lunch today. He feels bad. I can always tell. But sometimes my bathroom feels like a chemistry lab and I do everything. He just has to show up. But he just gets anxious over nothing. Sometimes I feel like he isn't totally opening up. So how can I help if he won't be totally honest?

 

[MrsWKJ]

CD8 today - we started BD'ing last night. Also started OPK testing on Sunday. I'm taking all my good vitamins & fertile CM, drinking grapefruit juice and pomegranate juices, eating lots of fruits and veggies, and TONS of water. Feeling very positive and excited about this cycle!

By the way how do you hold it for 2-4 hours for OPK testing when you have to drink 8 glasses of water per Fertile CM instructions? Seems like an impossibility!

I know its so hard to hold pee. Im using CB digital OPKs so they say FMU is ok and it works. So thankGod no pee holding this time. I got UTI twice in two months due to these opks i wasnt drinking enough water and holding my pee.

 

[MrsWKJ]

We are going to lunch today. He feels bad. I can always tell. But sometimes my bathroom feels like a chemistry lab and I do everything. He just has to show up. But he just gets anxious over nothing. Sometimes I feel like he isn't totally opening up. So how can I help if he won't be totally honest?

I think you should talk to him about how you feel and start asking him questions as well. Like i feel like this about it whats your opinion. This way he'll start adding his own input seeing you are giving away your thoughts as well.
The thing is all the times i told my husband that im checking my OPKs and this is my fertile time things never went ok. I didnt feel the chemistry. I think guys love the spontaneous element about sex. So now i try to keep everything sealed. Dont keep OPKs in the bathroom , didnt tell him im following SMEP nor when will be my fertile time. He knows we are trying but hes thinking its the relaxed approach and its so much better this month
Girls have to do all the stuff to make sure they have sex at the right time. We need to admit the fact that there might be one in a million guys who would be as participated in the process as us ladies. So dont worry about that. Its the same everywhere.

 

[MrsWKJ]

Add me to the list, CD1 today.

Done!

 

[floridasian]

CD8 today - we started BD'ing last night. Also started OPK testing on Sunday. I'm taking all my good vitamins & fertile CM, drinking grapefruit juice and pomegranate juices, eating lots of fruits and veggies, and TONS of water. Feeling very positive and excited about this cycle!

By the way how do you hold it for 2-4 hours for OPK testing when you have to drink 8 glasses of water per Fertile CM instructions? Seems like an impossibility!

I know its so hard to hold pee. Im using CB digital OPKs so they say FMU is ok and it works. So thankGod no pee holding this time. I got UTI twice in two months due to these opks i wasnt drinking enough water and holding my pee.

OMG I didn't know holding your pee can cause UTI's. Most definitely don't want that (have had two in the past and it was the worst!!!) Thanks for the warning. Those CB digital things are expensive! I'm using the IC's and it doesn't say FMU is not recommended so maybe I'll try that?

 

[beaglemom]

The problem is we are normally not very active. So even with spontaneous he would know. The crazy thing is we were doing smep and it went great. The all of a sudden it went downhill and since then we have not been able to get back up. And today is my first fertile day so I wasn't even saying we are ovulating. I haven't even told him of the spike yet. And we have had the problem in the past of me always having to start things. If he never initiates it makes me feel unattractive. We need to talk but more important he needs to figure this out for himself. I can't fix it if he doesn't have any solutions. Plus talking to my dr yesterday had me all upset anyways. I'm ok with all the other stuff falling on me. If I bring my 75% he should be able to bring his 25%. And when I get mad be just wants me to not be mad so he apologizes. I don't want an apology I want to know how to get past it. He is a wonderful man and I love him. But I can't fix it by myself. Ugh!

 

[MrsWKJ]

CD8 today - we started BD'ing last night. Also started OPK testing on Sunday. I'm taking all my good vitamins & fertile CM, drinking grapefruit juice and pomegranate juices, eating lots of fruits and veggies, and TONS of water. Feeling very positive and excited about this cycle!

By the way how do you hold it for 2-4 hours for OPK testing when you have to drink 8 glasses of water per Fertile CM instructions? Seems like an impossibility!

I know its so hard to hold pee. Im using CB digital OPKs so they say FMU is ok and it works. So thankGod no pee holding this time. I got UTI twice in two months due to these opks i wasnt drinking enough water and holding my pee.

OMG I didn't know holding your pee can cause UTI's. Most definitely don't want that (have had two in the past and it was the worst!!!) Thanks for the warning. Those CB digital things are expensive! I'm using the IC's and it doesn't say FMU is not recommended so maybe I'll try that?

Yeap thats what the doctor told me, the second one was so bad took more than 2 weeks of antibiotics course and theres no way im using them again. Having UTI is worse than not being able to use OPKs atleast you can have sex, and the painnnnnn :/
Yeah if it says nothing about FMU use that. Someone posted a thread about CB digital on sale on ebay. You can use ICs with CB. When it gets dark use CB to confirm.

 

[beaglemom]

I bought my monitor used on amazon for $100. Came with 2 months of strips. Used sounds gross but it's really fine. Check online, you may get lucky. Also check online pharmacy websites like rite aid and Walgreens. They were the next cheapest.

 

[fairyy]

CD8 today - we started BD'ing last night. Also started OPK testing on Sunday. I'm taking all my good vitamins & fertile CM, drinking grapefruit juice and pomegranate juices, eating lots of fruits and veggies, and TONS of water. Feeling very positive and excited about this cycle!

By the way how do you hold it for 2-4 hours for OPK testing when you have to drink 8 glasses of water per Fertile CM instructions? Seems like an impossibility!

I drink plenty of water whole day but restrict the intake 3 to 4 hours before testing. After the testing is done again I drink loads and loads of water to help with cm and it works.

 

[MrsWKJ]

The problem is we are normally not very active. So even with spontaneous he would know. The crazy thing is we were doing smep and it went great. The all of a sudden it went downhill and since then we have not been able to get back up. And today is my first fertile day so I wasn't even saying we are ovulating. I haven't even told him of the spike yet. And we have had the problem in the past of me always having to start things. If he never initiates it makes me feel unattractive. We need to talk but more important he needs to figure this out for himself. I can't fix it if he doesn't have any solutions. Plus talking to my dr yesterday had me all upset anyways. I'm ok with all the other stuff falling on me. If I bring my 75% he should be able to bring his 25%. And when I get mad be just wants me to not be mad so he apologizes. I don't want an apology I want to know how to get past it. He is a wonderful man and I love him. But I can't fix it by myself. Ugh!

yeah i know what you are trying to say. Does he know you feel that way? I mean did you have a conversation about his participation in the past? If not i think you should have a long talk with him probably he thinks its not big of a deal for you or you don't feel so strongly about him not initiating it. If you talk to him May be he'll open up more about whats going on in his mind. And how he feels about the sex life. Since hes always closing the topic by apologizing than talking about it. You need to start the conversation and discuss it with him. Healthy sex life is very important in a relationship. You can also talk to your doctor he might recommend some supplements to increase sex drive. Its not that uncommon to take them i've heard alot of people take them and they say it has helped them alot. = )

 

[floridasian]

@ MrsWKJ & beaglemom - I'll have to check out Amazon and the drugstores. Thanks!

@ fairyy - that's what I've started doing but with all that water it's still hard to hold it for more than an hour! I am on the dry side so I need all the help I can get!

 

[beaglemom]

He is taking enzyte which helped a lot. He is not against using help. And the conversation has been had in the past. He is a pleaser and hates confrontation. But that is not a solution. And believe me I am not confrontational about it. But he just takes all blame and apologizes. I tell him I may have some blame but no way to know if he doesn't say. I am very open sexually but he gives me nothing to go on. Hopefully another talk will help. It feels good to vent about it. Thanks.

 

[MrsWKJ]

He is taking enzyte which helped a lot. He is not against using help. And the conversation has been had in the past. He is a pleaser and hates confrontation. But that is not a solution. And believe me I am not confrontational about it. But he just takes all blame and apologizes. I tell him I may have some blame but no way to know if he doesn't say. I am very open sexually but he gives me nothing to go on. Hopefully another talk will help. It feels good to vent about it. Thanks.

Hehe yeah during this SMEP i had to initiate most of the times cuz i knew it has to be regular every otherday but once he feels im in the mood he knows what has to do So dont worry even if you have to start it. This whole ttc thing is frustrating enough to just make us crazy lol. We should just keep in mind that having sex to conceive is entirely different than having it otherwise. Most of the times when we initiate it we do so cuz we know we have to not cuz we want to lol so we should cut them some slack.

 

[fairyy]

Same is the case with me. Most of the time I have to initiate things. Sometimes even though I initiate I don't get him to BD. I had a +opk at cd13 this cycle. And I didn't make him to BD. He was like tomorrow we will do. He didn't know anything about +opk. So I was just mad that night and the following day and I wanted an answer. We are NTNP since January but no BFP yet. I think because our sex life is not that great. Anyways we had a discussion and he made it up to me and we ended up BDing on cd14. He said we are gonna make it fun and improve our sex life, will have some frequent sessions from coming cycle when we will TTC. Hope he doesn't change his mind.

U are not alone dear.