Starting IVF in Dec/Jan/Feb on NHS (UK)?

[hippiehappy]

Wow not a good morning so far! I was going to write an almost identical message to Sophie's!
Haven't tested yet and won't do so till tomorrow but I've started spotting too and I know that if it wasn't for the Cyclogest It would be in full flow now.
I will test tomorrow as previously decided and then on OTD, but I already know that it will be negative. I told the DH last night what to expect, he was saying what most of you said, that I can't be sure and so on, but I told him that I know my body and that I'm telling him now just to prepare for the worst. Spotting has confirmed my worst fears...
Anyway, will let u all know what the test says but I can't promise to be very active on this forum either, sorry
By all means I can update the front page with your results and I'd like to know what happens with you all so I will try and pop in but if I don't, please feel free to DM me and I will add your updates.
I really really sincerely hope you all get your BFP's!
Lots of luck and thank you so much for having made this a lot easier for me over the past 2+ months.

 

[Wallie]

I'm so sorry Hippy and Sophie. I know what it's like from two previous failed cycles how awful it all is. I have also tried to prepare myself that this one won't work but I still have that hope it might.

You both do what you have to do to keep strong

 

[KittyCat82]

I'm so sorry ladies if this is the case. Still hope it's not but I too, know how you feel. My first fail hit me hard. It's not that common for ivf to work first time and I totally understand why people can't face doing it again or can't afford to which is a shame. You will feel better in time and lots of hugs for now x

 

[kazzab25]

Quick post from me as I'm at work sorry no personals!

Sophie and hippy everything crossed!! Your not out yet!

AFM I'm having transfer today 2 embies both 7 cell not sure if this is good? 2dt! X

 

[hippiehappy]

Hi ladies, thank you so much for all your messages. I'm strangely ok about the whole situation, I guess it's the hormones but also because unlike Sophie we get another go on the NHS. I also responded well to treatment, so no reason why we shouldn't try again. Just a shame that due to the DH's azoo our fertilisation is never going to be great, though what keeps me positive is the fact that my eggs are ok, my uterus is ok and so are my hormone levels... I basically have nothing wrong with me now as the salpinges were treated. True, I can't conceive naturally as my tubes have been separated but with the DH's azoo that would not have been the case anyway...
I'm pretty confident that we will get there in the end. The good news is that when the DH had TESE they got 16 straws, you only need 2 per IVF cycle so we really have enough left for another 7 cycles if needs be, before he needs to go back to surgery. We've also discussed self funding some cycles if the next one fails too, I own my house and we probably have £30K equity in it. I hate the area where we live and we were gonna sell up and move anyway, if it means that we sell up, use the equity to fund further IVF cycles and move into rented accommodation so be it. Having children is WAAAAY more important to me than owning my own home. Money comes and goes.
Well it looks like 2012 will be the year of needles for me! I'm not feeling sorry for myself at all though, I know it could be far far worse.
Like Kitty says the chances for it to go ok at the 1st try are not very good. I understand that success rate is less than 40% per cycle, so it was always more likely that it would fail than not.

Kazza, 7 cells is great, I assume it's a 3dt? One of mine was a 7 cell embie, the other only 4 but apparently 8 is as good as it gets so 7 is near perfect, you will have a fab chance with two 7 cellers!
Let us know how it goes.

I've got over myself and of course I will still be around, unless I have a major wobbly of course, which I am not discounting!

Will probably start my journal soon too, I think it might be a good idea.

to all and thanks again xx

 

[hippiehappy]

Oh Kazza just re-read your message, 7 cells at 2 days is amazing! I don't think it gets much better than that really! FX and enjoy ET, it's by far the best bit xx

 

[Boofle]

Kazza - good luck today who decides when transfer day is - you or the clinic? I'm excited for you x
Hippie and Sophie - everything is still crossed for you both
I can only imagine how ur feeling
I'm hoping tomorrow shows more follies for me and maybe trigger shot tmrw night

 

[kazzab25]

Hiya amsat at clinic now they have decided today is the day at 3 days after collection

 

[SophieBee]

Back again! Only to say that it's definite - the old slag bag is here, making the place look untidy.

Mr Bee and I had a good old cry together this morning, but the good thing is that we're both in the same place in terms of deciding what to do next. We'll talk to the consultant and find out what the deal is, but it really does seem to us that my eggs are not up to scratch, so if that's what the consultant says then we'll definitely call it a day. Is one of the hardest things I've had to do, but we agreed that we can't put ourselves through this rollercoaster if there is no real hope and that we need to give ourselves time to grieve and heal and then work out some plans for our new future.

Thanks again everyone - you're all really wonderful. Hoping for BFPs for you all really soon.

 

[Sambatiki]

Im so sorry Sophie I really hope that you have some options available to you I am gutted for you

 

[kazzab25]

Sophiebee I am so sorry Hun xxxxx thinking of you xxx

 

[hippiehappy]

Hello girlies,
like Sophie the came in full force here too yesterday. I still tested this morning and as expected it's a . I rang the clinic and as I tested early they said that I still need to test on OTD which is Thursday, bit of a waste of money if you ask me... they also advised to carry on with Cyclogest but the nurse said it's up to me so I don't think I will bother. I'm 13dp3dt which is 16 DPO, there is no way another 4 days of bum bullets will change things and I just want to draw a line under this all now and move on.
The thing that really hurt was being told that I won't be able to have my second cycle till I get AF at the end of April, which means start DR in mid- May. I was really hoping that I would be able to start a month earlier than that, but they want me to have 3 times to ensure my lining is 100% back to normal after all the drugs of this cycle. So, definitely NO 2012 baby for moi

Anyway, like I said before, it's likely to be going all quiet on the Hippie front for a while now, but I will definitely lurk to check how you are getting on and by all means please DM me to update the front page and I truly and honesty wish you all the best for a you all deserve it so much.

 

[Wallie]

Thanks Hippie for posting.

I know it's so upsetting but at least you have a plan, that's what I've always needed when a cycle failed, it gives you something to focus and hope for. Don't you just wish though that it was you who got the bfp, it's totally my dream.


Clinics are stupid though asking you to take progesterone whilst having AF, what numpties, we know when AF is here eh! And they still ask you to test on official testing day, twats!

My clinic was the same about 3 AF's before you can start another cycle. Seems to be the protocol for some clinics.

Best of luck for the future

 

[Traskey]

Aww Hippie and Sophie I am so sorry to read this

When a cycle fails it really is the worst feeling in the world. I cried a river and like Wallie, I still had to poas on the official test day but I stopped taking the progesterone. It was just slowing down the inevitable full flow and I needed to move on mentally! I also had to wait for the after IVF bleed and 3 normal periods before I could have another go.

We talked about adoption, having another go etc but about a week later when I think the crying finally stopped. I'd be ok and then i'd just start silently weeping.

I can understand you wanting to take a break from here. I wish there was something I could say to make things easier for you.

 

[Boofle]

Ah Sophie and Hippie - so sorry to hear your news don't know what to say, its horrid, best of luck whatever you decide to do

I had my 2nd scan this morning - few more follies for me and lots lurking in the background. EC definitely booked for Tuesday hoping for lots of good quality eggs. I'm feeling shocking today, not sleeping well - maybe all these hormones floating around my body.
Last injections tonight

 

[KittyCat82]

Sorry again ladies. Like I said before, my first fail hit me really hard, more than I thought but you do feel better in time. I think that having to wait a while has actually been beneficial to me. May will be here before you know it hippie. Hugs x

 

[Sambatiki]

Hippie and Sophie - I am so so so sorry Its soooo unfair I totally understand the need to take a break, but you know we're all here to support you xxx

 

[kazzab25]

I'm so sorry hippie xxxxxxxxxx thinking of you xx

 

[PGLady]

Hello everyone, back from my break and with tears all over my face I'm so sorry to hear your news Hippie and Sophie Nature is so cruel. I hope you are spending time with the people you love and are doing what you need to to grieve xx

Hippie, I think you have a similar attitude to me -it's good to have a plan, and if you keep throwing the dice, your number should come up sooner or later. Just make sure you take care of yourself and try to have other things in your life to enjoy together - I hope you find a way of filling those three months with some good times.

AFM, going slowly bonkers counting down to Friday At least I have a frostie as a plan b, I'm so grateful.

 

[Sambatiki]

Hi Ladies,

Sorry I was MIA yesterday

Hippie and Sophie I hope youre bearing up ok

Wallie - Good luck for tomorrow!!

PG - Got my fingers crossed!!!

Please, Kazza, boofle and sorry anyone else I have forgotten hope youre all well xxx