Surnames

[Jade--x]

I was in an abusive relationship when I concieved, which was definately not planned, and left not long after finding out and hes been nothing but an absolute p**** since..and my LOs got my surname, and obvo I definately wont ever be getting back with his 'father' and Im with someone whos took on my LO as theres (they went through my preg with me and hes abso great) and were about to get engaged but have a long engagement and WTT to baby #2 in 2011 for a 2012 baby, and when we get married and all our kids we have together will have my surname and he undastands that becuz of Tyler being my surname already and Im going to be honest with him and tell him who his real father is and that cuz i dont think its fair any other way even if he was abusive and not the kind of person you want around your child but the laws these days you dont get a choice :/

 

[Becky]

Jacob has his dads surname and its the biggest regret I have! I have even considered changing my surname to be the same as his as I cant change Jacobs x

 

[blondeNklutzi]

My OH and I have the same last name (Evans is pretty common, lol) so even if we do get married, there won't be any name changing hassle. That being said, I was kind of looking forward to changing my name with marraige so I won't be associated with that side of the family as much. I also really like the name Evan. Unfortunately THAT won't work lmao.

 

[Hobnob]

We'll I can see this from the other side of the fence so to speak

When I was born my mum was married to my dad so I had their married surname, she subsequently left him when I was only moths old. My mum went on to remarry when I was only a few years old and I was brought up thinking that the man she married and went on to have my 4 siblings with, was indeed dad too. I found out in my teens that he wasn't (wasn't shocked as I always knew I looked different to my siblings) and was rather glad as this man had emotionally and physically abused me for most of my childhood (but that's a different story).

So when I found out that this man wasn't my dad I went back to using the surname that I was born with, it caused all sorts of complications for me as my exam certificates were in the name my mum renamed me when she got married, and obviously I was now using a different surname!

I'm married and its always been so important to me that our children have the same surname.

 

[Flowerpot]

As Calm says, here in Spain we have both parents first surname, first the father and then the mother but here we come to another problem. Letting aside the fact that some surnames are hilarious and embarrasing (such as "X Pretty Pussy", or "X Pars-ley" - translated from Spanish), ours luckily aren't ugly but don't combine too well together... Translated ours kids surnames would be: "X of the Cross Cross"!!! We could chose to have mine in first position remaining "X Cross of the Cross", but although it sounds a teeny bit better, our kids would probably have trouble with their papers because that order of surnames isn't usual... Also my Grandma and Grandad had the exact same surname and they double-barreled in Portugal and so my mums surname is a repetition!!! Also this surname will get lost unless I decide to take that one instead of my Dads, but as his is so similar to DH's surname, it would sound almost like mine!!! ( If I took my second surname (mum's one) I am "X Cross N" and my kids would be "X Of the Cross N" or "X N of the Cross" which sounds the best but is the worst mess on papers of history!!! Probably end up with the worst combination out of comfort... Sorry about the babbling girls but it defo annoys me!!! Great thread by the way. xxxx

My husband is Latin american but I've just taken his first surname and any kids will just have that surname (I hope, I hope we can just give them that surname, I never thought about that until now). Actually I haven't changed my name yet as I thought I'd confuse the authorities here in Spain so I'm changing it by deed pole once back in the UK so that I don't have to take on both his surnames (as I would just using the wedding certificate). I've not thought any possible kids surname through at all though.

back to the original question, if my kids had different fathers but were close to their dads, I think I'd give them their dad's surname.