The BFP Before The 'Would Of Been' Due Date Thread - Any Joiners?

[carebear1981]

Lomelly > very nice bump!!

MrsMiggins > FX you get that bfp!!

 

[Mrs Miggins]

Mrs Miggins, yes it's both our firsts
I thought it might be the reality of it. It just hurts when he's angry and suddenly doesn't seem to care about me or the baby.
But then he hasn't seem to try and bond with the baby, anyway I can help with that?

I so hope you don't have to take that month off hunny, you really deserve that BFP xx

Thanks Jess. I suppose you've heard the old chestnut about Mothers becoming parents when they become pregnant but fathers don't become parents until the baby is born and it's not always true but it's certainly true that they don't bond with the pregnancy like we do. Obviously that doesn't mean they don't care but it's just harder for them. And half the time they are just thoughtless gits.

 

[Mrs Miggins]

Also I think once he has seen a couple of scans and you start growing it will become more real to him. I was worried at first that my OH didn't really care about the pregnancy but he did. And he is an absolutely awesome dad. Just keep telling him what you are feeling and try to keep him involved.

 

[xxxjessxxx]

Thanks Mrs Miggins, you've cheered me up lol.
Well it's just I talk to other women and their OH's kidd their belly, touch it and talk to it etc. OH doesn't. Just makes me feel like being Im being left out I don't want to push him or compare him just gets me down xx

 

[Mrs Miggins]

Pah. Mine never did all that. You see it all the time on tv and think that's what all blokes are like and they arent. He'll come through for you I'm sure.xx

 

[xxxjessxxx]

Ok thanks alot Mrs Miggins I understand things take time. Thanks again hunny.
Baby dust to you xx

 

[samj732]

Jess, I have read that men can get a little crazy. Their life isn't really "theirs" anymore, and there is so much attention going to you instead of them that they can get a little bonkers. I hope he straightens up soon

 

[Kelly9]

My husband wasn't overly touchy when I was pregnant with my son, but I'd take his hand every now and then when the baby was kicking so he could feel.

You guys have been so kind to me already with your gentle words about Hannah. It's so nice to know there is unconditional support on here. I find a lot of the girls in my journal just don't get it as none of them have had a late loss or a loss at all.

Today I got metaphorical slap in the face, I had gotten a postage slip so when I went to pick it up from the post office it turned out to be a similac baby package, the poor postage lady I nearly started bawling right in front of her. I don't even remember signing up for anything so it was a nasty surprise.

Someone mentioned something about not testing early, I usually don't either when ttc on a natural cycle but since this will be treatment and I have a very good chance of getting pregnant i know I won't be able to wait till 14dpo. I'll likely test on the 7th I think I'd be 11 or 12dpo then depending what day they transfer my two embryos but I'll try hard not to test before 12dpo.

 

[Mrs Miggins]

All the very best Kelly.

 

[girlinyork]

Oooh, keep us updated Kelly. We love BFP announcements in this thread

 

[stephanie1990]

Thanks ladies, I try talking to him and we seem to understand, and he seems to show he'll work at it but the moment something annoys him he goes so angry again

Welcome Kelly, Im so sorry to hear about Hannah, that must of been so hard I hope you get your bfp and this group helps you greatly

Lomelly you have a beautiful bump coming along!!! It's good to see you finally put it up

Stephanie - sorry about the short mesaage before, that's when OH started acting up.
It would be good if he could go with you, maybe it will help with how he is. Is it negative in how he acts now?
I started feeling slight feelings 2-3 weeks ago now. Feels odd, at first I thought it was gas, but the more I've concentrated on it all Im now sure it definitely is the baby
Sorry to hear your getting bad backs hun - does anything majorly help it then?

xxx jess xxx Its ok hun My oh was just the same, he still is. My best friends oh touched her belly, kissed it, talked to it etc and it made me feel left out at first but then i thought my oh must be scared, esp with what he had been through, He got so attatched before the mc and i think hes still scared to this day, i know he will change as soon as he gets his daughter in his arms and i think the same will apply for your oh. Men can get left out in pregnancy too, they dont have the feeling of a little baby in their belly, they dont feel movements etc, I was pissed at first when my oh didnt seem fussed about me being pregnant but iv come to understand that i think hes scared so im ok with it. I get him to use the doppler sometimes which is nice. Sorry for the long post, just wanted to try and help

My movements felt like gas at first it was ever so strange lol. you wait for your stomach to start jerking about and moving, now thats funny lol.

Nope nothing helps backache, i just move around all the time, it sucks xxx

 

[Kelly9]

I will of course keep you guys updated, I'm a long term member of bnb and have lots of posts, this is my life line sometimes.

 

[samj732]

Kelly, so sorry to hear about your loss but hopefully you'll get your forever BFP soon. I agree that it's harder to talk to it with people who have never had a loss because they just don't understand.

And yes, this thread does like BFP announcements, I got more congrats in here then anywhere else and I pretty much love these ladies

 

[Kmae]

Aww..Samj, thanks for the kind words.

Kelly9, my heart breaks for your loss. I am really hoping you get your BFP with this first treatment! I can't wait to hear how it goes!

 

[girlinyork]

Kmae, your chart looks good. I reckon yours and mrs muffins are bfp charts

 

[girlinyork]

miggins, not muffins lmao! Stupid phone autocorrect

 

[xxxjessxxx]

Thanks ladies
he said today he doesn't care about me urghhhhhhh i feel so stuck xxx

 

[Kelly9]

I hope to add to your bfPs with all the rest of you.

 

[girlinyork]

Thanks ladies
he said today he doesn't care about me urghhhhhhh i feel so stuck xxx

Wtf!? He said that? Maybe you could contact Relate and work through this

 

[lomelly]

I second that... wtf?? not sure if talking to a counsellor is an option, but I hope you guys can have a heart to heart and figure out why he's so hot and cold with you, it's not fair to you and LO at all..