The LTTTC thread for everyone.

[HappyAuntie]

Secondary infertility is so tricky. I'm so thankful to have a child, but it's harder not to think about it because you can't isolate yourself from kid stuff.

I think secondary IF must be incredibly challenging because it doesn't get the "respect" it deserves - you get a lot of the "Oh, well, be glad you have one" BS (and therefore a lack of support) from people who don't know any better. You even get the "at least you know your body can do it" crap from people with primary IF, as if we're all in some sort of pain olympics vying for who has it worse.

But I can guarantee you that having primary IF does not protect me from thinking about it all the time... unless I vow never to leave my house, to cut off all contact with my sisters (whose kids I adore), and never to turn on the tv or go online or pick up another book for the rest of my days, it's impossible to isolate myself from kid stuff either. Even when I'm having a relatively good day, reminders of my infertility are everywhere.

We all have been dealt a shitty hand.

 

[CaliDreaming]

HappyAuntie, so true. IF sucks no matter what! No ifs, ands, or buts!

 

[crystal443]

Ready- its was warm here yesterday at 86 or 30 for those of us that use celcius I'm glad summer is fast approaching and the kids are soon finished up for the year We've booked a flight to take DS to the Gold Coast for a birthday weekend in january so should be fun!!

HA- I agree with what you said about IF, its painful no matter what type Primary or Secondary

Morning ladies I'll be back later just popped on to say hi,

 

[More4mom]

Hello all! Sitting here at 6 dpo... Going nuts! Feeling like this is the "now or never" month...! Needing some help to get through this... I can't seem to keep my mind focused on anything except this!! I swing from excited and hopeful to absolutely terrified that AF will rear her ugly head!

Agree with the IF sucks thought... I've never been brought to tears as often (and I mean OFTEN) over the same thing in my life. I have 2nd IF. It's dis-heartening... and discouraging...

And yet, it lead me to you guys! So I am thankful for that!

 

[readyformore]

as if we're all in some sort of pain olympics vying for who has it worse.

I like that one.

It's primary that's worse, hands down.

Secondary is tricky because you feel like you can't actually validate the sadness and sense of loss because you know it could be worse........it could be primary. But, you see people everyday pop out a dozen kids without batting an eye and you think you'd just like a fair shake at it. It's like walking down both sides of the street at the same time. You're raising kids, but you're infertile as well. How.........odd!

I know that when I went through primary infertility, I never thought that someone with kids would still find infertility so painful, since they already have children. That part has really surprised me.

 

[Milty]

I love what you guys are saying ...also secondary is less shocking when you have had primary...

I will also add that when you've had primary but somehow got pg but you don't know how ...well then secondary can be more frustrating

 

[Milty]

More I know you will want to kick me for saying this but ... this month is like your first month TTC now with everything out of the way ...

I think your odds are good for this month but I also don't think this is your last chance..

Now you have a real chance

 

[Milty]

Also the 2WW is driving me crazy too

 

[readyformore]

I love what you guys are saying ...also secondary is less shocking when you have had primary...

Well, I'm totally shocked.

Maybe it's because I had infertility-spontaneous-spontaneous-infertility? I thought those 2 spontaneous pregnancies pushed me toward your average fertile woman. I thought that infertility was behind me because really, who is lucky enough to have to deal with infertility twice? (To which I have gotten the comment several times, "Hey, at least you've moved past primary and got to secondary." Thanks for pointing that out. I happen to know the effing difference.........I've done it TWICE! )

Anyway, I never thought I'd be here again. I feel like I shouldn't be surprised because I was infertile at 24, but nope. I'm totally shocked. I never saw this coming.

 

[crystal443]

I love what you guys are saying ...also secondary is less shocking when you have had primary...

I will also add that when you've had primary but somehow got pg but you don't know how ...well then secondary can be more frustrating

I have to say secondary IF was no shocker for me, I even expected it after struggling to get pregnant with DD and DS What has shocked me is that after 13 years of trying we have still not succeded.

Secondary is more frustrating for me, I know I can do it but its just not happening I guess if I give up it will never happen so we try each month and hope

 

[Milty]

So cycle buddy...how do you feel?

 

[LLbean]

Crystal and Milty ... When will you start testing?

 

[Milty]

Oh I'm thinking 12DPO

 

[LLbean]

So the weekend... Looking forward to it

 

[Milty]

Not me ...I feel like this is the last month of extra fertility since my chem

Oh and I also wonder if I'm imagineing things

 

[crystal443]

10-11 DPO for me I think unless my temp dives then I won't bother

 

[crystal443]

Happy Halloween ladies

 

[Milty]

Ahhh love it Crystal!!!

 

[crystal443]

I'm now thinking should I change my ticker to Christmas after today but then I think am I messing with karma and I shouldn't change it mid cycle I have too much time on my hands

 

[CaliDreaming]

Good luck Crystal and Milty!!

I am going to have to skip out on handing out Halloween candy this year because I have been so exhausted lately.