The Over 35 Newbies and not so's :)

hi ladies, just swinging by to say a MASSIVE CONGRATULATIONS to Everything, Dexter looks absolutely fab!

just read the last few posts and if I am lucky enough to have another baby there'll be none of this VBAC nonsense for me - i'll be elective section all the way! better the devil you know...! I often look down at my scar and think Christ how did Joey get out of there (he's 98cm tall and 2 and a half stone now!), and then i remember that my scar is infinitely wider than my foof!!!!!!!!!

Anyhoo no news from me, just had bloods taken for AMH test and DH is wanking in a cup this 'coming' Saturday, lucky him.

Oh Everything - when i read about Dex waking every time you put him down, I remembered Jojo being exactly the same - our saviour was the swaddle (and also a bit later on the dummy, which did not interfere in the least with breastfeeding). Hope he settles down a bit soon.

Will swing by again, and continue to lurk. Hope all well with everyone. xxx

Hi Captain, lovely to hear from you! I am 'back in the fruit bowl' with you again as sadly our pregnancy didn't work out. It would be great to hear about how you get on with your treatment and maybe we can share our continuing frustrations with the whole process xxx
 
Everything- I REFUSE to contemplate what a 3degree tear entails exactlty! <rocks silently in the corner at the horror> :help::ignore: lol I am refusing to think about pain and suffering at the moment lol...
However, i hope you heal quickly Everything!
Really glad there is no sign of a murmer too! :hugs:
It's so cute that Fin is taking to Dexter quickly. I do think it is a good idea to involve the older children in little ways they can help- stops them feeling pushed out so to speak i think.

oh and BTW I agree with Star- Just because you have now given birth doesn't mean you get chucked out this thread.... I can gather lots of tips for when this one arrives too!!

Ive never seen those grow bags- i'm still debating on whether to get a sleeping bag thing- not sure about those, or whether there is a risk of baby overheating?

Captain! That comment made me :rofl: Roll on Saturday eh lol. Glad things are progressing for you tho. Be sure to give us updates!


Well my glucose test came back fine and dandy! no problems there.

I have called my midwife earlier today over a coupld of concerns (she didn't get back to me either!) I will try again tomorrow.
I'm sure i'm just being either pananoid- or i could be just a weakling with no pain tollerance, but since Sunday day i have had the most uncomforable pressure feeling around my upper abdominal area. It tends to come and go every few hours-will last for about 2-3 hours slowly increasing in pressure, til i feel that i can't take it any more, then it just disappears!
I have no cramping or pain in lower part and i can feel little miss kicking away regularly. I think this is coming from above my uterus. I don't know if this is normal growing, stretching pains, organ displacement and i'm just a wimp :shrug:.
it was really bad today for a couple of hours too that's when i called her. More painful that discomfort.
I'm feeling fine now tho, and have had not felt it since about 5pm.
I would have thought my midwife would have called back- but is there anyone else i could call tomorrow for advice?
 
Chelli, that sounds nasty :-( Could it be indigestion, perhaps? I know that that can be incredibly painful. Or is it lower down than that? Maybe, as you say, it's things moving / stretching. I used to get pain at top of my bump if I'd been walking or exerting myself, could it be something like that? Could you maybe get a GP appt if it's causing you a lot of pain? Bad that your midwife hasn't called back though. Hope it eases up for you x
 
hi ladies, just swinging by to say a MASSIVE CONGRATULATIONS to Everything, Dexter looks absolutely fab!

just read the last few posts and if I am lucky enough to have another baby there'll be none of this VBAC nonsense for me - i'll be elective section all the way! better the devil you know...! I often look down at my scar and think Christ how did Joey get out of there (he's 98cm tall and 2 and a half stone now!), and then i remember that my scar is infinitely wider than my foof!!!!!!!!!

Anyhoo no news from me, just had bloods taken for AMH test and DH is wanking in a cup this 'coming' Saturday, lucky him.

Oh Everything - when i read about Dex waking every time you put him down, I remembered Jojo being exactly the same - our saviour was the swaddle (and also a bit later on the dummy, which did not interfere in the least with breastfeeding). Hope he settles down a bit soon.

Will swing by again, and continue to lurk. Hope all well with everyone. xxx

Hi Captain, lovely to hear from you! I am 'back in the fruit bowl' with you again as sadly our pregnancy didn't work out. It would be great to hear about how you get on with your treatment and maybe we can share our continuing frustrations with the whole process xxx

Hey hinky! Would be great to join up on the crazy TTC train again, I'm really sorry to hear you miscarried again, hopefully you can get some insight soon into why that might be and get fixed whatever needs fixing (if anything - you never know it might just be really rotten luck). I haven't really joined up with any other threads as I'm somewhere between LTTTC and Assisted Conception right now, so great to have a friend :thumbup: xxx


Oh - Everything - Joey was a Woombie baby too, I have a similar picture of him but he is about 5 months old in the picture (he only gave it up just before 6 months old...I had to send him into nursery with it which was a tad embarrassing!) x
 
Chelli, that sounds nasty :-( Could it be indigestion, perhaps? I know that that can be incredibly painful. Or is it lower down than that? Maybe, as you say, it's things moving / stretching. I used to get pain at top of my bump if I'd been walking or exerting myself, could it be something like that? Could you maybe get a GP appt if it's causing you a lot of pain? Bad that your midwife hasn't called back though. Hope it eases up for you x

definately lower down than indigestion. It kind of feels like someone has pipe a tube in my side and is slowly blowing in air! and the pressure just gets so uncomfortable, but then just goes?
The thing is, it will happen regardless what i'm doing. I sit in an office at work most of the day.
I'm going to speak to the midwife tomorrow- or call the maternity unit and see what they say.
when its not happening, i feel perfectly ok- and as i said i can feel little miss moving and kicking just fine too.
Will see what they say and if no joy i'll tackle the GP x
 
Hey hinky! Would be great to join up on the crazy TTC train again, I'm really sorry to hear you miscarried again, hopefully you can get some insight soon into why that might be and get fixed whatever needs fixing (if anything - you never know it might just be really rotten luck). I haven't really joined up with any other threads as I'm somewhere between LTTTC and Assisted Conception right now, so great to have a friend :thumbup: xxx

Ok, so I've bitten the bullet and made a little ttc thread for us (and anyone else over there who wants to join) here

I don't come on here every day but could do with some support and a friendly ear x

Ladies: feel free to stalk us and join in, of course :)
 
Everything, I'm glad you're two boys are getting on and that no heart murmur was detected when you took Dex back to be checked. Brilliant news :happydance:

Captain! Good to hear from you and great to see you still get me :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
I'm glad to see things are moving on for you and look forward to hearing what happens after Saturday. Good luck and :dust: to you

Hi Hinky :flower: good to see you back again too. I would love to stalk your TTC thread (and chip in from time to time) but the link wasn't displaying on my phone. I'll have a look and try to find you ladies anyway.

Rowan I'm glad M's party went well and you've reached a decision to have your c section. An elective c section is often a positive birth experience and I'm still terrified of my VBAC. I do wonder why I'm bothering to plan one half the time with the worry its causing me. I came across a positive VBAC story on the third tri forum today though and that's inspired me again, for now at least.

Chelli great your glucose test came back ok. Your pain sounds really nasty though. It sounds like LO is doing great but I hope your MW is able to reassure you and hopefully even give you some answers/solutions so things can get better :hugs:

Xx
 
Ok so as for me my ankle is still really swollen and painful. My Dr offered to sign me off work until my maternity leave starts (2 weeks tomorrow) but I've asked to take it week by week as ideally I'd like to tie up some loose ends and say 'see ya later' to my colleagues before I disappear for 11 months. We'll have to see how it goes though.

On the positive side I have been so immobile my SPD pain is almost non existant. Hooray :happydance:

I've been having horrendous sleep problems with little moo though :-( She's been showing signs of separation anxiety during the day too and has been screaming if I leave her to pop to the loo and has been resisting going to nursery.

The HV thinks she is possibly anxious either about me being unwell with my ankle or having worries about how the new baby will effect her (or both) so has advised using a gradual withdrawal approach instead of cc (which we tried but didn't achieve anything except upset us both anyway).

Tonight is the first night and getting her settled to bed was successful (she was asleep within 30 mins - big improvement) but I've been lying on her floor ignoring her for over an hour now and although she's in bed and quiet she's still not asleep.

This is so hard and its so tempting to take her into our bed so I can be comfy at least but I really want this problem sorted before Logan arrives as I know our bed just ain't big enough for four of us to get a good nights sleep in it...

At least I can catch up with my sleep tomorrow as she will be at nursery because I should be at work.

Oh well, signing off now in case the light from my phone is enough to keep her awake.

Bye for now x
 
Hi Ladies,

Just wanted to give you an update. When i woke this morning, the pain was gone- and it has not returned all day??
I managed to speak to the midwife on the phone. She said that maybe it was trapped wind :blush: and a combination of stretching. She said that because i can feel little miss moving and kicking (which she is doing as i type) she isn't to concerned but to go up to Maternity unit if the pain returns so that she can be monitored.

Maybe i am just a wimp?? which is even more worrying about how i'll cope with LABOUR!!

anyway thank you for your concern- and for the fact i can mention trapped wind and not blush too much! lol


Oh dear Star, you do seem to be having some issues right now, SPD, Ankle and now your poor Maia being anxious and upset.
Can i ask what you mean by cc? :shrug:
I don't have any advice myself having never been through it, tho i am sure i will have it all to come! Just wanted to wish you luck that she feels more settled soon- and you can get off the floor VERY soon! THAT can't be good for your comfort lol

I personally can't wait for my maternity leave as i am very much sick of my job at the moment and feel it can't come soon enough!- bet i will have moments i regret saying that too!.
Hopefully you can manage the next 2 weeks without damaging the healing but don't over do it!
I'm sure work will cope for an extra 2 weeks without you! you need to be fighting fit for when Logan comes! (BTW i must have missed when you named him sorry! Love that name too )



On a slightly different note ladies- what advice on types/makes of bottle do you reccomend. I'm hoping to pick a couple of bits up this weekend- and bottles/steraliser are on my list- but there are just sooooooo many types. The bottles are just for when i express at times. i understand i'll have to see what Millie will like, but do you have any suggestions of make?
 
Hey hinky! Would be great to join up on the crazy TTC train again, I'm really sorry to hear you miscarried again, hopefully you can get some insight soon into why that might be and get fixed whatever needs fixing (if anything - you never know it might just be really rotten luck). I haven't really joined up with any other threads as I'm somewhere between LTTTC and Assisted Conception right now, so great to have a friend :thumbup: xxx

Ok, so I've bitten the bullet and made a little ttc thread for us (and anyone else over there who wants to join) here

I don't come on here every day but could do with some support and a friendly ear x

Ladies: feel free to stalk us and join in, of course :)


good luck ladies- i will follow how your both getting on and wish you all the :dust: best!
 
Thanks Chelli :hugs: glad your pain has gone. In terms of bottles we used the Tomee Tippee closer to nature ones and Maia got on well with them. I honestly think its good advice to buy one bottle from a few different brands though. As much money as you can save on buying bulk packs from a particular brand its no good if your LO won't take to what you've bought.

I'm having a bad evening that's gone on in the same vein as when she woke last night. Maia went to bed at 7 and is still not asleep despite having ongoing company. I'm pretty much in despair now to be honest and I don't know what to do. I just know I can't go on much longer like this :cry: The health visitor is calling me again tomorrow but I really don't know what to suggest now that we haven't already tried and failed miserably with.

CC is controlled crying and is very controversial on here. The idea is you 'train' your LO to settle themselves by not responding to their cries (after initially checking there is nothing wrong more than protesting that they don't want to go to bed) and regularly going in to there room after set periods of time to reassure them you are still there without comforting them or otherwise reinforcing their behaviour.

The guidelines are it should never be used for babies under 6 months but I wouldn't even dream of it for a baby that young to be honest.

I find it hard to listen to Maia scream even when I know she is having a tantrum as she isn't getting her own way (ie getting to stay up). They reckon if you do it consistently the crying rarely lasts more than a few nights and never more than a week but I find it so horrible x
 
Chelli I'm glad your glucose test came back fine. Not so glad to hear about your trapped wind... no need to feel like a wuss though, it can be extremely painful. I know someone who was recently treated for appendicitis. When they took it out the appendix was healthy, so they concluded that his pain had been trapped wind.

We also had the Closer to Nature bottles, and also Avent as I'd heard good things about both of them. Fin never took to any bottles but I would still recommend you try one of each of them. Also I never tried them myself but lots of ladies on here rave about Dr Browns bottles so that gives a third option.

Captain and Hinky - I've joined your new thread so that I get notifications (and to introduce myself for if any new ladies join you, because I may well post again in there if I feel I can help with encouragement, support etc). I will be following your journeys and look forward to the day you are also posting pictures of your new LOs... please don't give up hope :hugs:

Starlight - poor Maia, and poor you. Crying it out and controlled crying are both concepts that sound mean and avoidable until you are actually in the situation of having a baby/toddler that is clearly manipulating you by refusing to sleep. We have been lucky with Fin's sleeping and I have only had one occasion where I used it because he was trying to get me to let him sleep in my room, something I didn't want to start. It must be difficult when you can pretty much identify the cause of it as being something that is upsetting her, I agree it would be harsh to deal with it by cc but then if nothing else works, you must get to a point where cc is better for both of you if it sorts out the problem in the long run :shrug: It's times like that, that I think how much easier it will be when they can communicate more - especially when they can communicate their feelings.

I think Fin is struggling to deal with the car accident we had. He keeps talking about it, bringing it up about 10 times a day. Out of nowhere he'll suddenly say "Morrison's lorry" then "in our lane". We told him yesterday the lorry had gone home and everything was ok, that he didn't need to worry. He said "Finlay worried". I don't know if he understands the concept of being worried but the way he keeps bringing it up makes me think it's playing on his mind, poor little man. Hopefully it is just a phase that will pass if we keep reassuring him.
 
hey ladies :)

quickly popping on befire going to try and have a hot cuppa!

chelli glad your glucose results were ok and hope the pain stays away!

we also used tommy tippe closer to nature (the anti colic ones with the hole in the teat) and will get more this time - we used a steam steriliser as we don't have a microwave

starlight hope maia settles again soon - Martha is up and down all night but its her teeth so I just go with the flow lol

captain and hinky - keeping my fingers crossed for you guys x

everything poor fin bless him - is he ok being in the car?

we have snow been -6 here mostly but got up to -2 today bit precarious walking with pushchair on the ice lol!

thanks re positive thoughts about c section guys it means a lot am seeing the consultant next thurs so we shall see what she says - shes pretty cool so I'd be pleased if she was doing it

Marthas doing ok off the gaviscon - her throat does seem sore sometimes when she swallows but she doesn't seem to be having much reflux so hopefully it'll settle - am starting her on cows milk in the sippy cup when the formula runs out...wish me luck!

Michael doesnt half move - crikey Martha was active non stop but he is waaay more active - he seems more forceful and angular somehow - maybe I can feel more cos Im not as fat as last time lol! with Martha my tummy would move etc and you could see a vague shape but this looks like actual body parts sticking out its a bit freaky!

am starting to fret that were not ready for him yet stuff wise - I mean obv we have stuff from Martha but he needs clothes that aren't pink, we need drawers for his clothes etc, monitor, isofix base, new bottles etc etc - had a worrying about money day yest it does overwhelm me some days - dh too I think, but mostly we just get along on a wing and a prayer!

x
 
I think Fin is struggling to deal with the car accident we had. He keeps talking about it, bringing it up about 10 times a day. Out of nowhere he'll suddenly say "Morrison's lorry" then "in our lane". We told him yesterday the lorry had gone home and everything was ok, that he didn't need to worry. He said "Finlay worried". I don't know if he understands the concept of being worried but the way he keeps bringing it up makes me think it's playing on his mind, poor little man. Hopefully it is just a phase that will pass if we keep reassuring him.

I think it's right what you have said, told him that it's gone home or gone away now. And maybe when he brings it up just say "that was a silly old lorry, it's all gone now!" or something. It's natural for him to remember it as it must have been a highly charged emotional incident. I know it's not the same, but Stanley gets freaked out by so many things, and we find it helps just to reframe it a bit, sort of laugh a bout it and say "that was a funny old [whatever] wasn't it?". Could you somehow make it into a story that plays down the lorry bit ("and then a silly old lorry ponked into our car") and ends with the happy ending of you having baby Dex? Just if he mentions it.
 
I'm having a bad evening that's gone on in the same vein as when she woke last night. Maia went to bed at 7 and is still not asleep despite having ongoing company. I'm pretty much in despair now to be honest and I don't know what to do. I just know I can't go on much longer like this :cry: The health visitor is calling me again tomorrow but I really don't know what to suggest now that we haven't already tried and failed miserably with.

Not sure if I have much advice, but since Stanley has been in a bed we've had to be with him until he falls asleep every night. This can be from 10 minutes to over an hour. We take it in turns so only do alternate nights, but it is exhausting for us at the best of times, don't know how you are managing :hugs:

We have found that it's got easier over time, by following a very predictable routine. But it has taken time. We have a routine of putting his blankets over him so he's tucked in, read 2 stories, each time turning the dimmer down until it's nearly dark. We then say goodnight to the sun on his Groclock, and I kiss him goodnight and put his little music thingy on...

This is where the fun starts as he tries to climb out of bed, take his socks off, shout "I don't want to go to bed", "it's playtime", "want juice", tries to climb on me, pull my hair, etc. We sit right by the side of the bed and firmly put him back if he tries to get out. But with no talking, eye contact etc. If he lays down nicely I give him a pat or a stroke, still not talking or looking but this encourages him to stay laying down. Eventually, after repeating the above several times, lots of wriggling around, chatting, excuses etc he will fall asleep, and then I sit there for another 5 minutes to make sure he's *really* asleep before creeping out of his room.

I did experiment with leaving him (cc) but he didn't really cry, just trashed his room! So I am not trying that again. Like I said, no real advice but lots of :hugs::hugs::hugs:

I really hope Maia settles down for you soon. Does your health visiting team have a "sleep clinic"? My hv has mentioned it to me - I said that I thought I'd probably tried everything but she said sometimes they can just tweak little things to help. Might just help to have another opinion.
 
Hinky - Joey is exactly the same other than he's still in a cotbed and even though he's capable of climbing out, he doesn't. He just lies there 'daddy, stay there' so daddy usually stays with him (he rarely wants me as I'm usually at work) and then we get all the stalling tactics, after a nice bedtime routine. Everything from 'more milk' to 'hot', 'cold now, where blanket?','where mummy?', 'oh look daddy Piggle' to making Piggle talk/sing/dance, shouting '1,2,3 - Mr Tumble!'. I find it so hard not to laugh but I'm not the one sitting there for up to an hour! Although if I am physically back from work I'm usually downstairs on the laptop still working so I know which i would rather be doing!

In other news, joey has come out above expectations in 7 areas of his 26 month assessment at nursery (and behind in 1 - toilet training, very typical of boys apparently!). They are prepping him for ofsted 'gifted and talented' status which means he will be pushed a bit harder in terms of learning literacy and numeracy skills. He can already count to 20, recognise and spell out his own name in phonics, knows the phonic alphabet 'a is for apple' and can count groups of things up to about 8 and recognise the numbers 0 to 10. With 2 accountants as parents not a surprise but I was pleased as I do get guilt pangs from working such long hours and it is great that he's doing so well at nursery.

Have a lovely weekend all!
X
 
In other news, joey has come out above expectations in 7 areas of his 26 month assessment at nursery (and behind in 1 - toilet training, very typical of boys apparently!). They are prepping him for ofsted 'gifted and talented' status which means he will be pushed a bit harder in terms of learning literacy and numeracy skills. He can already count to 20, recognise and spell out his own name in phonics, knows the phonic alphabet 'a is for apple' and can count groups of things up to about 8 and recognise the numbers 0 to 10. With 2 accountants as parents not a surprise but I was pleased as I do get guilt pangs from working such long hours and it is great that he's doing so well at nursery.

Have a lovely weekend all!
X

Wow, that's brilliant! Go Joey! :happydance:

Well, I worry for the complete opposite reasons... Stanley doesn't go to nursery, and I do sometimes worry he's not getting that structure. I know he's a very bright child (probably why he is also very manipulative and clever at bedtimes!!), has really good speech, is good at counting, and knows lots of his numbers and sounds, but we don't do it in any structured way or record what he can or can't do. My mum has him when I'm at work and is brilliant with him - takes him to all sorts of groups, and they do lots of different varied activities (she has worked in nurseries and schools most of her working life, so I know she's giving him good input). I plan that when he's 3 and we access the funding for nursery, he'll go on the days my mum doesn't have him and hopefully get a bit more structure. I must admit I would feel like a mean mummy pushing him, but I don't mind someone else doing it :haha:

To be honest, I'd be happy if they could get him to eat his lunch :haha:

Oh, btw, re the potty training, Stan is not AT ALL interested in the potty. Although we've implemented a sticker chart for teeth brushing and given him some AMAZING rewards so that we can use that lever when it comes to it! We're going on holiday in Feb so I didn't want to be midway through TT when we went, so we'll probably wait until I'm off at Easter.
 
Just have to share this with you ladies...

Stanley and I standing at the bus-stop in town.

Stan: Done a poo outside.

Me: oh, you haven't, have you? (has a quick sniff). No darling, there's no poos down there.

Stan: just a little fart.

:rofl:

I have NO IDEA where he got that from... :shrug:
 
Just have to share this with you ladies...

Stanley and I standing at the bus-stop in town.

Stan: Done a poo outside.

Me: oh, you haven't, have you? (has a quick sniff). No darling, there's no poos down there.

Stan: just a little fart.

:rofl:

I have NO IDEA where he got that from... :shrug:

Ha hilarious!!!

I get 'ooooh TRUMPETS!'

I think joey and stan sound quite similar, they are near identical age wise I think, joey was born 4.11.10

X
 
Just have to share this with you ladies...

Stanley and I standing at the bus-stop in town.

Stan: Done a poo outside.

Me: oh, you haven't, have you? (has a quick sniff). No darling, there's no poos down there.

Stan: just a little fart.

:rofl:

I have NO IDEA where he got that from... :shrug:

Ha hilarious!!!

I get 'ooooh TRUMPETS!'

I think joey and stan sound quite similar, they are near identical age wise I think, joey was born 4.11.10

X

Yes, just 4 days between them as Stan was 8th Nov. I might need to use 'trumpets' too as I am not a fan of 'windypops'. As little kids we used to call it 'blowing off', which still just makes me giggle every time I hear it!
 

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