Things I cannot say out loud....

[mummy2lola]

Lo-I wish I could read ur thoughts,ur so happy until it comes to feeding time and I feel like I'm constantly force feeding u.I wish I could stop u screaming and I know ur reflux must hurt so I'm so so sorry that mummy gets stressed and upset,it's just bcoz I hate seeing u cry and always worry that the hv will think I'm a bad mummy if u lose any weight as u never have before.mummy wishes that the milk would just magically appear in ur tummy when ur hungry so hat we could always be smiling and happy like the rest of the day.I love you xxx

 

[Lauki]

Migraine - Get lost. I can't have you now I have a baby!

 

[Ozzieshunni]

Alex for the love of god, stop being so fussy! It's absolutely exhausting that you fight your sleep all day long and won't settle for longer than 2 hours at night. I HATE TEETHING!!!!!!

 

[Lettuce]

God, my mum is a nice woman, why do you make it so hard for her?! Her brother died only last year and now another has been admitted with Korsokoffs?! not fair! She might have had 4 sisters and 4 brothers, but it doesn't mean she can do without some!
My poor uncle...
Jenny, please please please sleep better tonight! I'm so so tired. Xx

 

[KittenKat]

OH - Right now I would be almost happy if you didn't come back this eveninbg. I love you more than anything, but as I have been, to be honest, really upset all day because of you last night that I ended up having bad dreams about you, you have not even tried to give me 10 minutes of your time today so I could get some of it off my chest.

Of course I said you could play sub for your clubs mixed team this evening because you had already agreed to it, so what is the point of asking me afterwards if its okay?

You make promised that you just cant seem to keep, you do well for a little while then you just slip back to having what you want and me be damned, am I just going to have to retreat back inside myself so you get your fun?



With all this crap going on in my head its no bloody wonder my diet went out the window today, I am soooo going to be angry at myself tomorrow, but the chocolate cheesecake I made yesterday was lovely, and I was good and didn't eat all that was left and just had a small slice....oh and 5 of the chocs you bought yesterday. So today I have eated 5 chocs, 1 small slice of cheesecake (using lowfat cream cheese) 1 packet of crisps and a small piece of the bread rolls I made earlier to test it tasted okay as I was winging the recipe just a little. I'm supposed to eat somewhere in the region of 1500-1800 calories so even with all the crap I don't think I have managed it

 

[Natsku]

Dear pizza: Thank you for being tasty. Ditto chocolate. Ditto beer.

Dear Maria: Quit teething please

Dear OH: Thank you for agreeing that my birthday continues in the morning as you failed this morning. And thanks for suggesting pizza tonight, very nice.

 

[elephant29]

Thanks so much everyone, means a lot!

Our argument continued when he got up this mornin. He just couldn't admit to being slightly wrong. i left with Lo for the day and we exchanged words through txt. I got home and he made me feel horrible. i had this crying fit and could barely catch my breath. We both admitted to being in the wrong but secretly I think we both think the other person is wrong but we had to do something as it was making me ill. It still doesn't change loads tho so only time will tell.

Aw lettuce I hope ur mum and uncle are ok.

Xxx

 

[Eliza_V]

DH - You still haven't understood that I need a break yet then?? Just you? Oh, and stop calling the piss-up you're going out to on Friday a "bonding and gelling" evening for the "team" at work, and so you just HAVE to go as you'll be the only one who doesn't otherwise; you barely saw your daughter all last week (and the week before, actually) as you spent most of your fucking time at work either with them, or staying late doing work FOR them! I don't want to hear your excuses! FFS you only went out for dinner with them just over a week ago! The only time I've left LO with you was when I went to a first aid course for a few hours, and even that was for LOs benefit!! I haven't been ANYWHERE on my own for even an hour just to do something for MYSELF! I've been saying I need to get my hair cut for months, and you always say "well make the appointment then", but whenever I plan something YOU decide there's something more important that needs to be done isntead and screw up any plans I make, no matter how big or small! You make me feel like crap! And on Saturday, when we could've spent some time as a family (rather than a stressed hour in the evening) YOU went and got YOUR hair cut!! Then came back for 5 mins so I could have a shower, fucked off to get your tyres done, then you came home so we could go to a BBQ.. When I'd have much rather just spent some time with you alone. Yes we did some shopping today, but even that felt strained. Now we've argued this evening because I tried to talk to you about Friday, and you started making me out to be the big bad bitch!! I'm not saying you can never go out, but you've barely been home the last few weeks, and we have a 9 week old baby who has only started a bedtime routine this week.. I'm going to struggle alone! I haven't even bathed LO on my own yet since bathing her is your bonding thing.. She's in the big bath and I'll find it hard Not to mention the pain it will put me in because my back/knees/ankles are KILLING me at the moment. I'm on my own with her all day every day, and your main priority is work. Don't give me the crap about you're worried about "money" and "providing" .. I BOUGHT THIS HOUSE!! There's no mortgage to worry about, so that's one less HUGE expense! It's when you spend money on unnecessary things that you end up worrying about money.. Such as that new surround-sound system you bought when LO was a couple of weeks old??

RAGH!

I'd better stop now as I need to go massage and feed LO and I don't want her to see me angry yet again

 

[Lettuce]

Elephant, thanks, I think we're going to have to put him in care, it's such a shame! mum is so upset!
Natsku, so glad you had a good day!
Vixiepoo, that totally sucks. I know what you mean about them not finding time. I have to ask, see your joints? Are they reallly sore?! My hips, knees and ankles are in agony recently! I have hyper mobility so used to the pain, but they've be ultra painful recently! do you know what's wrong with yours? Xx

 

[Eliza_V]

Lettuce - Yeah they really hurt! Mostly if I've been sitting down for more than 15 mins or so and try to stand up.. I feel like an old woman with arthritis!! According to frantic searching on Google (lol), it's apparently normal up to 6 months after giving birth wacko as the hormone Relaxin still present in your body (which allows your joints/ligaments to relax and be more flexible for pregnancy/birth) but apparently it can hang around longer if you're BFing! *sigh* I couldn't even get off the toilet the other day and I'd only sat down for the worlds quickest wee as LO was downstairs! Sorry to hear about your Mum and Uncle too Hope you're doing okay.

Natsku - Hope you've had a nice birthday!

Lauki - Hope the migraine goes away soon.. I suffer with them too and know how debilitating they can me *sending virtual dark room, sleep, strong painkillers, and kool n soothe forehead patches*

Mummy2lola - Hope Lola feels better soon, reflux is never pleasant

Elephant - Sorry your DH is being such a.. Well I don't need to come up with a name as I'm sure you've thought of them all! Hope he gets his act together.

KittenKat - Don't sweat it about the cheesecake and chocolates - if your man is treating you like crap then you deserve a little pick-me-up! The diet can wait; if you're miserable then your heart isn't going to be in it. Besides, chocolate is scientifically proven to help improve your mood

PS... LO - Sorry I wasn't in the best of moods when I put you to bed. I know it was a half-arsed massage and me and DH were arguing throughout, but I'm glad you calmed down and have gone to sleep. I love you so much. xx

Hugs to everyone. xxx

 

[Eliza_V]

Whoops, forgot to add.. Ozzie, hope you get some sleep soon!

 

[Natsku]

I think everyone on this thread needs a little chocolate! I'd share my birthday choccies but they're too nice to share hah!

To myself: Why did you forget to buy milk last night? Now Maria can't have weetabix for breakfast. And drinking 3 and a half beers was probably not the best idea when you know Maria is teething *sigh* T
To Maria: 6:15 is not wake up time grr

 

[Lauki]

I had some brownie last night, but ended up feeling so sick that I had to have Sophie in bed with me, because I couldn't sit up from the migraine nausea! She woke up like every hour and ended up taking up half the bed (how do they manage that when so small?!?!)..

At least there's only 1 day of this heatwave left!!

Family - Please take it easy with me when we're coming over to Holland next week. I really can't have anyone telling me that I'm teaching Sophie bad habits. If I have to hold her for naps because otherwise she won't sleep, so be it. I'm sure she'll grow out of it eventually. Also, if I nurse her more than 6 times a day and she needs nursing to go to sleep for naps, please let me. I honestly prefer it over her screaming fits!

 

[KittenKat]

I have chocolate to spare if anyone wants some, some Thorntons Moments, some Toblerone, and two cheesecake bases and extra light philly to make Toblerone cheesecake. Cheesecake is super yummy, the orange ones in the Thornotns are bordering on illegal in their goodness.

OH isn't treating me "badly" he just doesnt seem to think sometimes and to be honest it bugs the farg out of me. I didn't get to tell him until he came home last night what was exactly wrong as he just didn't didn't make any time for me yesterday. He was out of the door doing his van stocktake at just before 9 until 11, then he went to the supermarket so was gone until about 12-1. He then ate lunch, back out to van to stick the new boxes out there he had bought, then out at about 2.30 to take our eldest girl to a party back by 5 then out for his match at 6.30

 

[Lettuce]

Oh god... Cheesecake....
Hair, please look halfway decent today... I have baby and toddlers, and I hate that I look more slummy mummy than yummy mummy... It's especially embarrassing since my change bag proclaims I am... (pink lining bag) I just say it's ironic...

 

[Ozzieshunni]

ME ME ME ME ME! I'm JUST as important as Alex! I love him to bits and would give anything for him, but please remember world that I exist too!

 

[BrokenfoREVer]

FOB...the fact that you never consulted me about buying this stupid lizard makes me wonder why I've bent over backward to give you what you want regarding this child...no more you insensitve ass!!

 

[Ozzieshunni]

Oh and Daddy, I love you so much, but please don't wind me up and say I'm mommy coddling him and that he's manipulating me and BFing past 2 is gross. I know you don't believe these things and you're just teasing me, but I'm in no mood to be teased. Sleeplessness does that to you!

 

[BrokenfoREVer]

Also...at 9am. I DO NOT want to have to listen to true blood. I'm sick of telling you it catches my eye & I have no choice but to hear it. It's a disgusting show & I'm hungry & now feel sick cos of it. Thanks!

 

[KittenKat]

Okay girls time for the cheesecake pickme up recipe for you all.

Digestive biscuits
200g Philidephia cheese/or macapone
Large chunk of toblerone
Butter

Smush biscuits to crumbs (very good if feeling crappy)
Melt butter and combine with biscuit smush
Stick biscuit mix in a flan case or other dish (I bought disposable foil flan cases in Asda) and stick in fridge or freezer
Melt Toblerone, either in microwave or in a bain marie
Let choc cool slightly then sling in cheese and mix mix mix
Once base is set shove choccy mix in and smooth over....lick the bowl and spoons, and anything that may have a trace of the mix left on it
Put whole lot in fridge until reset (probably about an hour)

Then....

EAT