Time Magazine and AP

[freckleonear]

Anthropological evidence actually predicts a natural weaning age of anywhere between 2.5 and 7 years.

https://www.kathydettwyler.org/detwean.html

 

[tina3747]

Hands up to one of the people thinking that this is a little weird!!!!....... BUT...That was last year , before I encountered baby club! I thought past one was no need at all, no benefits ect but after reading other people's views on the subject my views have been broadened a ton!! I did breast feed for the first 6 weeks and personally for me if I got that far one still would be enough for me (personally I will add again!) but looking t the awful comments people make on doing something that is far from abuse ,sexual and even incest is insulting to people who have gone through these traumas!!! I think if society can put eb in that category they need to look at the many story in headlines today that really are child abuse.
Good luck to those who carry on till the child quits.... Far worse stuff you can be feeding your child .... Like mcdonalds for instance but that's a whole other thread
*disclaimer* that was a joke by the way!!!

 

[midori1999]

Ok ladies, I think this thread has gotten off topic! The real topic was the actual picture. Many of us, like myself, have no problem with extended breast feeding, even if it is not necessarily for us. Personally I would express at that point, but I don't think a mother is wrong for choosing to breastfeed instead. However, I think putting your almost 4 year old son in a shock value photo on the cover of a magazine is wrong. And I feel that is what we are debating here, the picture.

I don't think it is right to judge or call people disgusting (although I used that word to describe the mother putting her child in a shock value photo-and that had nothing to do with her BFing him..just putting him in that photo) and I also hope people realize how much crap us FF moms get. I couldn't breast feed past 7 weeks. I drove myself insane and spent a fortune trying and felt awful about myself, and will never get back those 7 weeks with dd. And I was so tired of people saying "you can do it, you just have to stick with it...don't supplement, it will make it worse" Lucky for me I had friends whose little ones ended up in ER due to them listening to the extreme pro breastfeeders and didn't want to disappoint. What is also bad about that is since people keep pushing us and telling us we can do it, we feel like even more of a failure when we can't. I still get people asking me every day if I am breastfeeding, and sometimes dh and I lie because I hate having people judge me for formula feeding and I am sick of having to explain myself. I am also embarrassed to feed dd in public because I dont want people to see me using a bottle of formula. So please ladies, the judging goes both ways and don't think it doesn't....just let's please do our best not to judge each other. We are all good mom's and are trying to raise out children the best we can. As for this thread, let's try to keep it about the picture/article rather than putting each other down.

As for reporting one of the posters, again I think things need to be fair wobbles. I have seen other threads of people getting attacked where you have said nothing(actually took their side) because it wasn't something you disagreed with. If you allow people to attack someone for putting rice cereal in a 3 month old's bottle, then you shouldn't freak out when someone makes rude comments about EB. All attacks are wrong and should be handled the same way, whether you agree with the subject or not.

Erm, you've mentioned this going off topic, but have then started talking about FF, which is absolutely not relevent to the discussion. Lets not make this into another BF v FF debate...

The child in the photo is 3. Would it be more acceptable if the child were a baby in arms?

I know, I mentioned FF to discuss that on both sides we have negative comments coming our way and it should stop.

I think the photo would have been more appropriate if it looked more natural and loving. Not a kid staring at a camera. The photo was done for shock value, and in my opinion to use your son like that is not right. I would have been perfectly fine of a natural breast feeding photo of a mother and three year old.

Of course the photo was done for shock value. I am not sure why (on your later post) the editor's comments come as any suprise to people. They are in the business of selling magazines, they exploit anyone they feature in their magazine in order to make money, man, woman, child, celebrity or 'average' person. That is how it works. They want a catchy headline and they want to grab people's attention, either in a positive or negative way, whatever will get the biggest reaction and get the most people to buy the magazine.

I can't see how a more 'natural' photo would really be any less shocking (because most of the naysayers have a problem with a three year old being breastfed full stop) or likely to result in the child being bullied less. As it happens and as I have said, I don't think this will result in bullying for the child, so if no harm is coming to the child then I don't think it really matters whether they are being 'exploited' or not. Strictly speaking, we're exploiting our child every time we ask them to smile for the camera and any sort of pose for a photo for a magazine is certainly exploitation.

Good or bad publicity, this gets it into the public eye that three year olds (and older children) actually get breastfed and as the Mother's aren't being arrested for child abuse, then it's clearly not a welfare issue, so it gets that in the public eye too. I think the photograph is much better publicity for breastfeeding than if they'd shown a 'stereotypical Mum' breastfeeding looking all lovingly at her child, because it not only challenges people's views of the 'sort' of Mums who breastfeed, but shows all types of women do it.

 

[Lydiarose]

I think my OH's the only one that LIKES when i have milky boobies . . . freak

 

[pinklightbulb]

Mine doesn't He won't go near them once they make milk!

 

[Kel127]

I think my OH's the only one that LIKES when i have milky boobies . . . freak

Mine does too

 

[Lydiarose]

well theres a big want for it on the internet . . . dodgy porn sites etc so maybe there not the only ones !!!

 

[Brookey]

For me, its not the fact that its an older child feeding; its the picture they have chosen to use and the title.

I think they would showing attachment parenting and extended breastfeeding in a much better light if they had used a different photo. And using the title "are you mom enough" is bound to rile people.

Shame really, but this is the reason people think extended breastfeeding is weird (not me btw!)

Its a shame that people on here cant be more polite with their opinions. Ashlee you cant be suprised that people are getting annoyed with you, you have offended a lot of people.

 

[qpaulina42]

It's the front cover of a flipping magazine, it's supposed to be unatural and shock people, that's how magazines are sold.... take the naked preg pic of Sadie Frost, that wasn't natural, you think she wasn't airbrushed, or sits in that pose at home? Just like this lady and her son!

The picture draws you in to want to read the article, and it's worked!

The difference is sadie frost is a grown woman choosing to exploit herself. This is a child being exploited . And for those who said they don't see him getting bullied later on in school, get real. I worked in the schools (elementary through high school) for 7 years. This will be passed around and he will be tormented because he is a big kid sucking on his mom's boob in a picture that has been published. Even if EB were common where he is, no one goes passing around pictures of it at school. I'd have no problem with it if it were a different picture. One that was not for shock value and one where you could not see who the child was. So many of you seem so concerned with making a statement and standing up for what you think is right, without thinking of the well being of this child- and the mother has done the same thing. There is nothing natural about making a child stand on a stool, put his mom's boob in his mouth, and pose for the camera. It is complete exploitation and to me, that is what is disgusting.

he's home schooled, so no need to worry.

 

[Palestrina]

im not even goin to justify my opinions with an answer.... because they are exactly that OPINIONS!! it will never change n ill always find it disturbing. its just DEFINATELY not for me

Do you mean you can't answer my questions? Because surely this is a discussion, where people explain why they thinkt he way they do? Or did you just want to pop into the thread and declare it weird and disgusting etc and that's was it?

You don't have to think it's for you, but that doesn't mean you have the right to tell other women that they are weird or wrong when there are plenty fo benefits to breastfeeding to natural term and no negatives.

i have already explained my reasonings, if you failed to see n read them then so be it.
I also think a child that can speak with a dummy in its mouth is wrong too!
I also think giving a child a bottle with juice in is wrong (dentists will also say this as i was told by one) but u still see people doin it.

Yes i will walk by someone n if i saw them bf'in a 3-4 yr old ill judge them n talk behind their back. wrong? or is it just because im honest?? everyoner will judge n snigger at people at some point about anything, this is one i jus totally disagree with. medically approved with reasearch or not, cudnt care less its still wrong in my eyes, end of

I will not judge you for your opinion because an opinion is personal and you are entitled to it. However, we should not tolerate misinformation and hypocrisy. Someone who is capable of listening to the dentist's advice about juice should have the ability to listen to medical research that is readily available about breastfeeding. Your opinion is easy to ignore for most of us, but spreading misinformation is harmful. Why care about what a dentist says about juice but then say "medically approved with reasearch or not, cudnt care less its still wrong in my eyes"??

For the record, before I BF I didn't know how long I would do it and had a limited view of BF. I honestly thought I would be a hero for going 6months. But then the magical number of 6 months came and went and my baby was still being nourished with my breastmilk and I couldn't come up with a reason to force him to stop. We're coming up on one year now and my LO doesn't BF as much as he used to but we're still at it and I'm going to follow his lead for as long as he wants to breastfeed. I am thankful that I've been able to do it without being plagued by physical problems like mastitis, thrush, etc.

 

[Elmo5]

Midori ~ for reasons i stated earlier. fora child to physically latch on to a mothers breast past a year old (6 months wud be my limit) is just plain wrong n weird! if u want to give your child BM then put it in a cup! no1 wud be none the wiser, but wot if your child decided one day in a restaurant they was tired n wanted to feed AT 3 n startin askin for it, quite loudly, havin abit if a tantrum too, wud u be embarrassed or jus let him have his way?? n have everyone stare n judge u?

Your comments are unncessary, rude, insulting and ignorant.

 

[lhancock90]

Honestly, shes entitled to her opinion.
Just as the rest of us are.
EBF is fine by me, but not something i would do. MY OPINION.
Though i'm sure i'll be hit with a wave of women attempting to "educate" me now.
I've been educated on it, its not for me, but honestly? I don't care if anyone else is doing it, they are raising there kids the way they want to and i applaud that far more.
I'm not suprised Ashlee has got a little irrate, with a billion members attacking her all at once, maybe she could express her opinion better but it doesn't take a hundred members to point that out and quite frankly some of the responses have been just as rude and aggressive.

Personally, i hate the article, i don't think the woman is doing it for her son at all, shes deliberating trying to cause controversy and gain herself some attention and its wrong to use your child in that way. I despise celebs that do it. If anything i think this is a negative for EBF, but shes obviously doing it for attention, not for the cause.

 

[readytotry]

Honestly, shes entitled to her opinion.
Just as the rest of us are.
EBF is fine by me, but not something i would do. MY OPINION.
Though i'm sure i'll be hit with a wave of women attempting to "educate" me now.
I've been educated on it, its not for me, but honestly? I don't care if anyone else is doing it, they are raising there kids the way they want to and i applaud that far more.
I'm not suprised Ashlee has got a little irrate, with a billion members attacking her all at once, maybe she could express her opinion better but it doesn't take a hundred members to point that out and quite frankly some of the responses have been just as rude and aggressive.

Personally, i hate the article, i don't think the woman is doing it for her son at all, shes deliberating trying to cause controversy and gain herself some attention and its wrong to use your child in that way. I despise celebs that do it. If anything i think this is a negative for EBF, but shes obviously doing it for attention, not for the cause.

But all of the replies complaining about her posts are opinions too...

Also, there is a massive difference between saying ebf is not for you and saying its "weird", "disgusting", "child doesn't benefit" and insinuating its sexual and perverse.

 

[readytotry]

Plus no one is suggesting that everyone do it or even "educating" about the benefits... Just saying that it would be nice if women weren't judged for doing it.
I would like to bf for longer and maybe I will but I am a little scared of people talking about me in the street the way Ashlee has said she does. No mother should feel like that.

 

[lhancock90]

Shes not the first woman to have that opinion. She won't be the last. 20 pages later and her opinion hasn't changed, its best to leave her to it.

I am curious however, when do you think its the right age to stop?

 

[lhancock90]

Plus no one is suggesting that everyone do it or even "educating" about the benefits... Just saying that it would be nice if women weren't judged for doing it.
I would like to bf for longer and maybe I will but I am a little scared of people talking about me in the street the way Ashlee has said she does. No mother should feel like that.

People will judge us in the street for every aspect of our parenting, its awful yes, but it happens sadly. Don't let it put you off.

 

[esmemuppet]

Another delightful thread ladies....!!

 

[bumpy_j]

Plus no one is suggesting that everyone do it or even "educating" about the benefits... Just saying that it would be nice if women weren't judged for doing it.
I would like to bf for longer and maybe I will but I am a little scared of people talking about me in the street the way Ashlee has said she does. No mother should feel like that.

I feel exactly the same

 

[readytotry]

I would like to bf until my Lo self weans. In reality I am not sure I can be that unselfish (not sure if this is the exact word I mean) and will probably encourage weaning from the breast after 1 yr old. Bf is a commitment in some ways and does involve some sacrifices (even as trivial as wardrobe issues) and so I think anyone who carryall on for that long should be applauded not judged.

 

[lhancock90]

Plus no one is suggesting that everyone do it or even "educating" about the benefits... Just saying that it would be nice if women weren't judged for doing it.
I would like to bf for longer and maybe I will but I am a little scared of people talking about me in the street the way Ashlee has said she does. No mother should feel like that.

I feel exactly the same

As mothers we are judged over everything, whether we BF or FF, wear or push, jesus, Evelyn can't have whinge on the bus without some old biddy tutting. I think we either accept that its human nature to pass judgement and stop letting it get to us or we hide ourselves away. But i know what i prefer to do. I wouldn't EBF but i wouldn't say a word to any woman that did.