Trying for #1, anyone is welcome!

[LoneWanderer]

Wait a goddamn minute... BUTTER IN COFFEE? What the actual..? No! I can't even believe that's thing. Butter? In coffee?

 

[Dream143r]

I'm doing no sugar, low carbs. Lots of protein, fruits and vegetables. Minimal caffeine, tons of water. I've had a rocky couple days though with AF around the corner i needed sugar in my life. lol

 

[LeeMcMee]

Welcome Zoey and Dream! WOW I have SO much to catch up on since last night and even this morning LOL been busy at work ugh. Work getting in the way of fun, booo. Will be back soon just wanted to peek in and say that I haven't forgotten you guys lol. I didn't bring any tests to work because I'm mad at my body right now LOL I looked into the preseed. Anyone ever read about it actually helping? I'm curious about this now.

Also, for the women who have trouble conceiving (and I might be in this list, I just don't know yet because I just started trying Jan 28th)... I was just talking to my cousin yesterday. She is about 34? She has a son from when she was 17 and her husband already had 2 kids before they got married. But once THEY started trying about 6 years ago, they were having issues so they got tested and his sperm was no good so she said they did IVF and she ended up pregnant with twins (boy and girl). The twins are about 5 now. Anyways, she had them in June 2013... in April 2014 she announced that she was pregnant again and this was on April Fool's Day so I said is this a joke lol everyone thought it was. She said "It's been taking us so long to even get pregnant with the twins, I wouldn't joke about this" and she's normally a jokester, so I was shocked haha. They conceived by accident 10 months after the twins were born! They were so happy of course because she said they only had a 5% chance of getting pregnant. Their kids are so friggin adorable omg. So Morgan and Landon were born and then Chase (family name) was born exactly a year and a half later.

So just know that there can always be a chance! They didn't think they'd have anymore kids, but shortly after having the twins... woops!

 

[Diedrek]

Wanderer- Ok first of all everytime I write your name it reminds me of that movie the Host! She’s an alien who named herself Wanderer haha. I actually liked it .. I don’t think anybody else did though! Anyways, I think writing is amazing! I’m a writer .. clearly haha. Just not in a cool way like you are! And hey- dream jobs don’t always pay the bills. Luckily we have our guys and a great support system at home Also I get what you mean about working from home. I usually go stir crazy if I’m home too long on the weekends. I’ve sometimes caught myself saying “I should’ve gone into work today” Eek freaking eek! Do you have anywhere cool nearby you could sit and write at? Like a Starbucks or a cafe with WiFi? That’d be a cool place to write somewhere outside of your home =D And yes oh my god butter in coffee. I’ve witnessed it with my own eyes! Then wanted to scratch them out and wipe the memory haha. Truly disgusting there’s no other way to put it! But it’s so good for preventative action against cancer so I honestly wish I had the courage to start and stay with it.


Holy shit that twin story!!! That’s insane! You always hear about that too omg they’re the story you always hear about but never actually know anybody it happened to! The couple who are told most likely will never conceive naturally and either DO right before they do IVF or right after! She’s blessed! That’s so amazing. Totally jelly and wish that would happen to me! Not the whole background part with the male factor but just it happening without medical intervention. I LOVE that story! And ... Now she can be done Haha.I bet you will have no problems girl! I do think this first cycle or two will be wonky because of the last years on BC but then it’ll regulate itself and you’ll be able to track everything to the T! Did you ever have af or regularity issues before the BC? Hoping it doesn’t even get to that point and you’ll get knocked up before then

I’m the same way with sweets and PMS’ing haha. I bet we all are! Mines never *too* bad. Not comical movies like bars of chocolate in my bed sobbing. Although that HAS happened I can’t lie lol. Just more like I find myself craving more than usual. I’m not a huge sweets person as it is. I don’t find myself caving or eating sweets everyday. But we do always keep cookies and ice cream at home because OH will eat a whole tub of ice cream in one sitting haha. He literally will eat it right out of the tub. He will pour the chocolate syrup right in there and eat from it you guys haha. Slightly annoying but t would be worse if I ate it more. It’s basically his and can do what he wants with it but I will have some maybe once a week. Then we both just sit there huddled together eating out of the same tub with the same spoon haha.

Technically af would be due in 5 days but there’s no way it’s coming. I have no pre af symptoms by boobs are not sore like they were this past month and I just don’t have anything else going on. A few cramps lately which is too early but not af bad. I really just didn’t O and I’m so mad at my body too!! Ugh! Maybe I should up the vitex dose? Gonna have to google it My favorite thing before bed haha.

*** I say YES to pre seed ladies! It seems like so many on BnB use it and rave about it It can’t hurt and it’s really not that expensive! And it’s everywhere you guys. I’ve seen it at Walmart, Publix, CVS, Walgreens, etc. I say go for it because I’m going to buy some for myself too From what I’ve heard is that it’s not supposed to -replace- your ewcm or give it to you in a bottle. But it’s more so giving you more for what you already have up there. Like if you have ew but not that much pre seed will help with that. Which I usually have a lot for a day or two but sometimes it seemed like I didn’t have enough. That’s where I’d want to use it for sure but it’s lube for the spermies so it’s probably good no matter what? Idk have you guys researched it any yourselves?? I’m only going off of what I’ve read here on BnB.

 

[LoneWanderer]

Wanderer- Ok first of all everytime I write your name it reminds me of that movie the Host! She’s an alien who named herself Wanderer haha. I actually liked it .. I don’t think anybody else did though!

Haha, nice, not heard of that one. It's a gaming reference, the name. Fallout series. The main character wanders the post-apocalyptic wasteland... I am an obsessive gamer, keeps me sane. Also, The Wanderer is a great song by Dion, used in the game...

Nah we're not fancy enough to have a Starbucks or anything. Teeny little coastal town, basically the arse end of nowhere. Nice beaches (if cold, windy and rocky is your thing), lovely countryside, not a whole lot of anything else - hmm, unless you're really into pound shops, then we're overloaded. Me mam's pub has Wifi but then I'd have to spend a bunch of time with her - I love her to pieces but in small doses, haha. Plus I dunno, writing in public feels like 'hey, look at me being a writer' - and that's not me. If I ever get round to publishing any fiction (unlikely as I'm terribly lazy when it comes to my own stuff) I definitely won't be using my own name or telling anyone it's me. Right now I've accidentally become a blogger more than anything else - both my own and other people's. What is it you write?



The reviews on Amazon won us over with preseed, so many people saying they get first time BFPs with it. Plus - TMI warning here - I don't think I've ever seen this mythical EWCM stuff, except when we're actually DTD, then I defs have the stretchy stuff. But of its own accord, never. I kind of presume if I get it at the important time, that's all that matters - but hey, the preseed can't hurt. Besides, Clomid BD does hurt..! We suffered on like troopers this month, but anything to make it easier is welcomed by me.

Still can't wrap my head around butter in coffee. F*** that.

I don't even like coffee...

 

[LoneWanderer]

Back on topic, and my usual boob pain is kicking in a bit. I think AF is gonna find me in next couple of days. Ah well, never mind. Here's to next month - or three months' time, however it turns out.

 

[Diedrek]

Wanderer- I live by the beach too! But always warm and sunny (FL) except for a few days when we cry if it drops below 70 degrees haha. And yea I agree, I don’t even like Starbucks but I do love my coffee! But I would never sit on my laptop anywhere while I ate or drank coffee. Not really my thing. All though when hurricane Irma came and we were without power for two weeks, there was one restaurant out of almost the whole area who never lost power so were able to stay open and feed people and let everyone use their WiFi! Yea we lost cell phone service too. Everyone was prepared for all these things but I guess I didn’t realize we’d actually be without phones! The streets were so flooded and I couldn’t get in touch with any of my family (I stayed home to hold down the fort lol) so I drove as close as I could get to my parents house and parked before it got too flooded. I literally had to walk two miles probably in waist deep rain and SEWER water just to check on my parents! Then had to swim back to my car. Yea, not fun at all! That was a horrible first few days of being lost and not knowing how bad the damage actually was or if everybody was ok or their house was damaged. I had a tree fall on my roof and crash though it causing the whole house to shake during the hurricane! Needless to say I took some really strong medicine and I was able to sleep until we lost cell service and lost any information on where it was at or when it would pass! Florida is not ideal but it’s beautiful most of the time lol. Plus I’d take a hurricane over a tornado anyday! Idk what it is but if I ever heard the sirens go off indicating a tornado like you see in movies I’d have a heart attack! I always think those sirens going off down here would mean it’s an alien invasion lol. Terrified of alien stuff but at the same time fascinated! Family of Navy and Armed force members so they know some scary stuff haha.

I didn’t mean that I actually write, not in the way you do. I just meant on here I seem to be able to write novels haha. I blame it on lack of bosses looking over my shoulders at work

I’m glad you’re another fellow pre af sore boober! There’s a couple here and I always say that if I ever got pregnant my one sign would be NO boob pain which would set alarms off in my head OR they’d be 10x worse than af boobs if it was possible! My last cycle I had only ONE sore boob until days before af when the other one became just as sore haha. You just never know I guess =/ Hope she stays away though, but if not here’s to April Bfps!!

 

[Nixnax]

Woah this has been busy today. Just a quick one from me because I’m in work for a few more hours yet. Will do a proper reply later.

Hi dream and welcome. I’m on cycle number 7 so I’m not far behind you.

I’m an IT geek. I work on an IT service desk.

I’m not really feeling much at all, just a few dull aches down there, nothing to get excited about I feel.

Will do a full response later

 

[LeeMcMee]

I also still have tons of reading to do lol I was busy at work today and I haven't been replying at home cuz my laptop wasn't connecting to my internet, but DH fixed it last night. We are going snowboarding tonight, so hopefully I get to read everything and reply tonight. No updates right now

 

[Nixnax]

Wanderer, I had EWCM for the first time this month. I’ve been taking EPO for 6 months but only 2000mg. I changed it to 3000mg and it arrived. For all of 4 hours. But it was there. I’ll take the same again next month.

I’m a pre af sore boober (if there is such a word). I normally get them around 4/5 dpo right up until AF. I’m 7DPO and have absolutely no pain whatsoever. Not even a niggle. I really hope this is a good sign. You wait, I’ll wake up with angry boobs tomorrow now.

I’m well jealous of you guys, living by beaches, going snow boarding as a past time, my life is dull compared to you folks.

I’m going to give preseed a go soon as well. Anything I can do to help things along. I already rattle from all the vitamins I’m taking

 

[LoneWanderer]

Wanderer- I live by the beach too! But always warm and sunny (FL) except for a few days when we cry if it drops below 70 degrees haha. And yea I agree, I don’t even like Starbucks but I do love my coffee! But I would never sit on my laptop anywhere while I ate or drank coffee. Not really my thing. All though when hurricane Irma came and we were without power for two weeks, there was one restaurant out of almost the whole area who never lost power so were able to stay open and feed people and let everyone use their WiFi! Yea we lost cell phone service too. Everyone was prepared for all these things but I guess I didn’t realize we’d actually be without phones! The streets were so flooded and I couldn’t get in touch with any of my family (I stayed home to hold down the fort lol) so I drove as close as I could get to my parents house and parked before it got too flooded. I literally had to walk two miles probably in waist deep rain and SEWER water just to check on my parents! Then had to swim back to my car. Yea, not fun at all! That was a horrible first few days of being lost and not knowing how bad the damage actually was or if everybody was ok or their house was damaged. I had a tree fall on my roof and crash though it causing the whole house to shake during the hurricane! Needless to say I took some really strong medicine and I was able to sleep until we lost cell service and lost any information on where it was at or when it would pass! Florida is not ideal but it’s beautiful most of the time lol. Plus I’d take a hurricane over a tornado anyday! Idk what it is but if I ever heard the sirens go off indicating a tornado like you see in movies I’d have a heart attack! I always think those sirens going off down here would mean it’s an alien invasion lol. Terrified of alien stuff but at the same time fascinated! Family of Navy and Armed force members so they know some scary stuff haha.

I didn’t mean that I actually write, not in the way you do. I just meant on here I seem to be able to write novels haha. I blame it on lack of bosses looking over my shoulders at work

I’m glad you’re another fellow pre af sore boober! There’s a couple here and I always say that if I ever got pregnant my one sign would be NO boob pain which would set alarms off in my head OR they’d be 10x worse than af boobs if it was possible! My last cycle I had only ONE sore boob until days before af when the other one became just as sore haha. You just never know I guess =/ Hope she stays away though, but if not here’s to April Bfps!!

Wow you were caught up in Irma? Bloody hell. I watched it come in on live webcams all that week (us Brits love a bit of extreme weather, we get very little of our own - an inch of snow or a slight gale and we lose our minds, so real weather is fascinating to us haha).

I tested today - I know, too early - and BFN. I trust that result to be honest, I don't feel PG at all. Not that I'd know what it feels like but I just feel I'd know, you know? Fairly sure she'll show tomorrow, will update either way.

Nix - 3000mg of anything sounds an insane amount haha! I hate taking pills, getting the clomid down has been hard enough. Honestly, if I need painkillers ever I'll have a ton of calpol rather than take a pill lol!

Snowboarding, Lee? Blimey! The most physical activity me and OH get up to on days off is a walk in the park to feed the squirrels! I'm pretty clumsy, I think I'd break fairly quickly if I took up any kind of extreme sport. Though I do like mountain biking, but my bike is a bit like me these days - aging and rusty and stuck in storage hahahahaha

 

[Nixnax]

They are massive horse pills as well, get stuck in my throat a lot.

I’ve had the day from hell. I didn’t make it to the gym, I was just about to leave when my dads partner calls me and says they are on the was to a&e/er, my dad was having a suspected heart attack. I’ve been at the hospital all afternoon. ECG and bloods suggest it wasn’t a heart attack but something else cardiac! He’s been sent home for now but has to go to a cardiologist tomorrow for an angiogram. Was so scary. He had to stay in the corridor for 4 hours because the department was full. Our NHS is still under so much stress, but bloody amazing

 

[LoneWanderer]

They are massive horse pills as well, get stuck in my throat a lot.

I’ve had the day from hell. I didn’t make it to the gym, I was just about to leave when my dads partner calls me and says they are on the was to a&e/er, my dad was having a suspected heart attack. I’ve been at the hospital all afternoon. ECG and bloods suggest it wasn’t a heart attack but something else cardiac! He’s been sent home for now but has to go to a cardiologist tomorrow for an angiogram. Was so scary. He had to stay in the corridor for 4 hours because the department was full. Our NHS is still under so much stress, but bloody amazing

Oh Jesus, sorry about your dad, that's awful. Hopefully they'll get to the bottom of the cause and get him well on the mend very soon. If they've sent him home that's surely a good sign - getting into a bed in the first place is tough, but once they're seeing to you they don't usually turf you out if it's unsafe to - otherwise it's on them if you get worse. So the fact he's recovering at home is surely a positive.

 

[Nixnax]

I’m sure he’ll be fine. He’s a stubborn old fool, refusing to admit something was wrong. He’ll get the treatment he needs tomorrow. Hopefully he takes the advice and rests

 

[Lady_Alysanne]

I surely missed tons in one day!! Sorry I couldn't join yesterday, after work and going back home, the exhaustion just hit me like hell.

Wanderer - I am a software engineer. And I suppose I am pretty weak as sometimes I just can't make myself do anything else than getting a shower and dinner after coming back home, specially when there is a deadline. Speaking of which I have one tomorrow.
The place you live in sounds amazing for a vacation, I like quiet places so much! And I love to see new places, both DH and I share this desire to travel which makes it more awesome. I mean I understand the charm of touristy places, but sometimes you just want to go somewhere close to nature, spend some quality time with your SO.

Zoey - welcome back dear, how are you feeling now? Any more updates?

Dream - Welcome to this thread! I am also trying for my #1 and on my third cycle. I am 29 and DH is 34, married for 6+ years. We live in different city, DH and I for our jobs, so we can't try every cycle. I am thinking of moving, if I can manage a job there. Till then, its a bit difficult for us to manage days off, time the vacation which is close to impossible. So this weekend DH is visiting me, so I am super excited about that.
Glad that you are making progress on your weight loss. I am opposite, I need to gain weight. All this work and stress is not helping either. But I guess I am just venting, I need to start taking better care of myself instead.

Die - OMG, I didn't know you had to go through all that when Irma came. I am so sorry, you are so strong to get through that. And speaking of tornado, you know they actually test the warning every Wednesday here. And thanks, I am super excited about DH visiting as well

Lee - Hi girl, hope you are having a great time snowboarding!! It's today right? Sorry if I misread the date. This is really amazing that you are enjoying your time right now, it will give you a much required break from ttc stress and testing. Fx that witch stays away. Can't wait to hear how your day went.

Nix - I am really sorry about your dad, and Wanderer said, if hes back home that should be a good sign. Prayers that he gets a speedy recovery.

 

[LeeMcMee]

I’m sooooo behind lol I have to catch up sorry work has been busy and I’m mad at my body 😂 I’ll turn my laptop on in a bit since I’ll be sitting in all night cuz of a snow storm. Negative test this morning 🤷🏻*♀️ I have a feeling My body is just still screwy from getting off bcp. Ok be back soon!

 

[LoneWanderer]

Morning all.

So, my BFN yesterday sent me into full meltdown mode. I threw like a seven hour tantrum, decided I am entirely pointless as a human being, broke my keyboard throwing it onto the floor - honestly it was like I was possessed I wasn't even that disappointed at the test so god knows where that all came from. I don't know if Clomid has brought on EXTREME symptom of PMS, or what. Today I'm my usual self, if a little tired from all the drama. AF due today, no sign as yet - cramps have eased really, feel a bit achey but that's it, headache but that's normal for me - too much computer work - and watery white CM rather than usual spotting.

Really thrown me not having my exactly-to-the-hour regular cycle, I feel very confused by my malfunctioning innards and am ready for this cycle to end so we know exactly what to expect from the Clomid on the next one. OH thinks my emotional state is a PG thing and I just tested too early - but I defs do not agree.

How's your dad today Nix? Hope his appts go well and you get some answers. Heart stuff is terrifying - but very, very manageable with the right meds and treatment. Hopefully he'll be right as rain very soon.

Sorry about another BFN Lee - I am as confused as you about your cycle, I think maybe you should see your doc and ask what's going on? At least they could do a blood draw in case there's a low HCG level the tests aren't picking up yet.

Lady - bloody hell, I can't imagine living apart from my OH even if we weren't TTC. That must be tough on you both. I hope you soon find work a bit closer to each other, so you can give yourselves the best chance.

Diedrek - feel free to share some spooky alien stories with us hahahaha!

 

[Nixnax]

Hey wanderer, sorry about your meltdown. I have felt like that sometimes. I don’t know where it comes from.

My dads at the hospital now, his appt is at 12:30. He still looks so pale and unwell today. I’m trying to talk myself into going to the gym in a min but I really can’t be bothered. My mindset just isn’t there.

Hope your AF stays away.

AFM- I’m 9DPO today, no sore boobs still, tender left nipple and a few twinges down there. I had another vivid dream last night that I was at work and a tornado was coming. I had to wake myself up, it was a horrible dream. I think it was readying this thread that did it lol. Where have these vivid dreams come from all of a sudden

 

[LoneWanderer]

Hey wanderer, sorry about your meltdown. I have felt like that sometimes. I don’t know where it comes from.

My dads at the hospital now, his appt is at 12:30. He still looks so pale and unwell today. I’m trying to talk myself into going to the gym in a min but I really can’t be bothered. My mindset just isn’t there.

Hope your AF stays away.

AFM- I’m 9DPO today, no sore boobs still, tender left nipple and a few twinges down there. I had another vivid dream last night that I was at work and a tornado was coming. I had to wake myself up, it was a horrible dream. I think it was readying this thread that did it lol. Where have these vivid dreams come from all of a sudden

Bless, sounds like it's really shaken him. Men convince themselves they are indestructible and then something like this comes along, really gets them down. My grandad has heart trouble, though he's usually in denial about it - won't take his angina spray when he needs to, pretends he's fine when it's bothering him. But his pacemaker and bypass did him the world of good, he's a million times better than before any treatment, and he's about to turn 90 next month - heart issues don't have to hold you back any. Really hope it all works out.

You never know, the gym might take your mind off things when you get there and start working out - chance to unwind just for an hour or so. But also, no shame in not going and taking some relaxing time for yourself instead. Keep busy, try not to dwell on things, get the day out the way, see what the docs say, and hopefully things will look much brighter later today. Will be thinking of you today.

 

[Diedrek]

Morning ladies

I didn’t take time to actually write here yesterday. I was so busy at work and then at home. I did end up on here a few times because I was googling stuff and I kept getting directed to old threads on here. Very useful info from past threads lol. Anyways my temp shot up today to 97.5 from 97.04. Probably nothing because I’ve only had watery/creamy cm the past two days. But last night I did have severe left ovary pain. Do any of you get that during your cycle? It was one of the bigger reasons my OB had me do the trans vag U/S because she wanted to rule out that I didn’t have cyst on my ovaries. I didn’t! Even the day of the test my overly was hurting so badly but they found nothing out of the ordinary. Ovaries and follies looked good for that day in my cycle. So ever since I just chalked it up to cycle pain! Anyways after the ovary pain I woke up with af like cramps. Only lasted 10 mins this morning. Also it warmed up after that cold front earlier this week and was hot yesterday. This morning it was very cold again! But I woke up feeling hot and my temp confirmed that.. so idk maybe I O’d yesterday. Of course I said I wasn’t even going to buy anymore opks until tomorrow and not even test until I saw EW but who knows my body is a wack job y’all haha.

Lee- Grrrr that bfn!! I see the indent line though? Not sure if I’ve ever seen that indent like on wondfos in pictures before. I have half a mind to tweak it but for some reason I end up ALWAYS finding lines when I do that. Sorry you’re so late for af and a bfp. So confusing! Do you feel anything af like?

Nix- I am so sorry to hear about your dad!! Thank god it wasn’t a heart attack but I hope his tests gave some kind of answers! Thinking it’s a heart attack is simple (allthough devastating) but to turn out not to be and be completely lost on what happened is so scary too! I hope it’s nothing serious, I’ll be thinking of your family today and sending lots of positive vibes your way. Keep us updated! Pops has our support here on BnB and lots of well wishes!

Wanderer- Eek I think we have ALL been there! I refuse to break any of my own stuff but I’m more of a super bitch haha. Mostly to my OH I just make really smart ass comments and act like a complete and total BRAT! Then get over it rather quickly and obsess over apologizing to him and making sure he knows I’m sorry lol. If you wanted you could always search the forums ^ for clomid symptoms and see that so many on here are going through the exact same thing. It’s really not uncommon I guess to feel super out of whack with your hormones. Your SO will understand, and you will too. Don’t be so hard on yourself either, it’s actually ok to flip your shit during each cycle! We can always blame the hormones Also you’re not late for af right? Some haven’t gotten their bfps till days after af never shows up. How are your symptoms?? I think you’re really lucky and brave to have gotten to his point with clomid. I have terrible and sometimes rare cycles and know id be put on clomid if I wasn’t such a chicken and just called this home ttc quits and reached out to a RE. You’re getting the best possible chances to conceive with the clomid.. && I’m sending positive vibes to you today! Will you think you’ll test again? A lot of us (who have strength) will wait till af is late because we’ve been so heartbroken by negatives before. I personally must like the pain and torture of bfns because I do it to myself all the time to Hang in there girl, you’re definitely doing the right thing and heading in the right direction. It will all be worth it in the end Glad you’re feeling better today and if you ever need to vent, you can ALWAYS vent to us! That’s what we’re here for

Lady- Yes omg Irma was honestly (not even being a baby) TERRIFYING! I’ve been born and raised here and have gone through hurricanes since I was a baby and my mom stuffed me under a mattress haha. But as and adult to have such a huge storm and having a house, cars and dogs is scary! Eek! The worst was the aftermath. It was mayhem to get anywhere there were no stores open, and mainly no ICE! Nobody was prepared to not have ice. It was so hot and there was no ice anywhere for drinks. Just having no electric, no phone service, no way to drive anywhere was awful. It honestly felt like an apocalypse lol. Plus when gas stations finally got their generators up and running the lines for gas were miles long. Everybody needed gas for their generators at home to run their fridges and fans. But you’d have to wake up early to get in line. We sat in line from 6 am- -1 Pm! I’ll live the rest of my life ok as long as that never happens again! Ok so how many days is it till your visit with DH?? Also I’m sure you mentioned it but is he coming to you the first trip, then you to him for the move? Is it a decent drive or a plane trip kind of deal? Does you both have apartments or houses in each city? I find that kind of nice to be honest, to have an out of town spot where you can go if you needed to and have your husband waiting You’re very lucky to have such a hard working guy. I know it must be really hard for him to be away from you, & I bet he’s really excited to see you!! When will you start packing?

All of you are SUCH amazing and STRONG women!! For all that we go through it’ll all be worth it. We will all have our day soon && I’m still cheering for each of you