TTC #1 Hopeful and Obsessed! lol

[puma1986]

SIL: Congratulations!!!!!!! I'm so excited for you!

Star:I'm certain your OPK will darken up in the next day or two! Can't hurt to DTD in advance and get a surplus of spermies

Green: "DH's baby gravy" OMG... LMAO. You're too much.

Belle: *Hugs!* I totally get it. Like Green said though, it's okay to feel down every now and then. Just remember why you've been positive so long and keep trucking along, lady! It's going to happen!

AFM: I now have a diagnosis of undifferentiated connective tissue disease with an extremely high rate of anti-nuclear-antibodies at 1:5120! (Labs dont test higher than that). So.... pretty sure my body isn't in the best shape to be making babies considering it's actively in the process of destroying itself! But I'm still here and rooting you ladies on!

 

[BelleNuit]

Oh my gosh Puma I looked into that connective tissue disease and it sounds awful! There must be treatments for it?? At least to keep the symptoms managed?? Are you doing okay with a diagnosis like that? I think I would lose it.

I'm so glad to hear from you again. You haven't been far from my thoughts!

 

[puma1986]

Oh my gosh Puma I looked into that connective tissue disease and it sounds awful! There must be treatments for it?? At least to keep the symptoms managed?? Are you doing okay with a diagnosis like that? I think I would lose it.

I'm so glad to hear from you again. You haven't been far from my thoughts!

I'm sorry for my absence. It's been emotionally trying recently. There are medications (plaquenil, for example, that cause blindness and other terrible side effects). I guess I'm still in denial. I don't want this diagnosis and the sad news is that it is likely to get much much worse since It has come on so suddenly and painfully. Am I doing okay? Not so much. I'm struggling pretty bad but I am hoping that I'll somehow wake up from all of this. Thanks for your thoughts, love. I have an appointment with one of the best rheumatologists in Philly in November (I've been waiting 3 months already before I was even given this diagnosis). I'm hoping he will provide better insight and a good second opinion.

 

[StarGazerRose]

Puma, Urgh, our bodies hate us enough, adding attacking itself just makes me mad at the body more than normal!!! I really hope there is something that can help you with it. Have they gave you any information about the chances of you conceiving?

I'm hoping it (the opk) will darken quickly. I'm still pretty excited about this round. I mean I'm just tickled still that I had my own period!

Well night ladies gotta pull DH off the games the best way I know how. *giggles*

(fixing my mobile misspellings)

 

[BelleNuit]

Please don't apologize for taking time away for yourself. You need to do what is right for you. TTC is overwhelming enough without receiving a serious diagnosis. You have a lot going on right now and that just plain sucks! I don't want this diagnosis for you either I am so so sorry this is happening.

In all honesty if I were going through something like that bnb would be the last place I would want to be because I would feel left out. I want you to know that you can still come here regardless of whether or not you are trying and I will be here to listen to you vent about everything else in life.

I so hope that the rheumatologist will be helpful for you and that you won't have to wait too long for your appointment!!

Damn it anyway puma! Bah!

 

[sil]

I will check in and respond to everyone else soon but I quickly wanted to respond to puma while I had a second.

Puma I am so sorry first of all that this is happening to you. I know it must be terrifying. Do you mind if I ask where you live? You mentioned philly. I grew up 20 minutes outside of philly and my family and many friends still live there so I visit often. I can ask around for any suggestions for doctors or any experiences anyone has in the area for you if you want. Please let us know if there's anything at all we can do to help. Sending tons of hugs love and positive thoughts your way.

 

[mnelson815]

Hey Green-That purple part of her opk would be where she is collecting the sample from, so the darker line you see is the control.

Star- I've used the digitals from Clearblue and I have realized you really can't tell much from the inside stick. It doesn't quite correlate. I have had the peak readings with the second line being pretty light and I have had negatives with the line there. I have never had two strong lines when I remove the stick after the digital reads it, but I have done testing with regular OPK and digital at the same time and the regular opk does show the strong test line over control with the digital lines not really showing anything other than the positive indication on the screen. Moral of my story - trust what the monitor is saying and not the stick for the digital type ones.

Puma - I am also so devastated to hear of your diagnosis. I constantly stalk this thread and post every now and then in it, but just want you to know that there are lots of ladies here for you and hoping that if you ever feel the need to vent or talk un-baby related, that all of us are still here for every kind of support. Will be thinking about you

Belle - I tried Femara this cycle and it has INCREDIBLY delayed my O. I am losing it over here. Just like you, I ovulate regularly, but RE suggested Femara and although I didn't have any poor side effects I have no idea what is going on and where my ovulation went. So if you dont feel comfortable taking it yet, I really wouldn't worry and rush yourself. I dont believe it helps out us ovulating ladies that much. Have you talked to your acupuncturist about intralipids? Mine recommended doing an IV of them if I ever go as far as IUI or IVF because that can be a major problem with implantation in people and most RE's dont do a work up to check for NK cells. All in all, it doesn't cause any negative side effects, but it can increase chances of implantation. Its neat to read up on if you have some free time. But I totally understand where you are at, and honestly if you don't feel the need to go ahead with intervention yet, then don't. You can always revisit it later. IUI and IVF aren't going anywhere

 

[BelleNuit]

Mnelson, good to hear from you again!

How much has the femara delayed your O??? I could use a little O delaying I think as I often ovulate on CD 12. The doc didn't say it was bad to O earlier, but asked if anyone had investigated my short cycles :s Made me nervous as now I wonder if it is something worth investigating LOL

I will have to look into those intralipids, thats not one that I've heard of before.

Thanks for reminding me that IUI and IVF will still be around if I decide that's the route for me! I just have this fear that if I wait it will be too late that all of a sudden I'll go into early ovarian failure or something... Which I know is highly unlikely, after all of my testing there is nothing to suggest that I have low ovarian reserve. So I have time.

I'm considering giving the femara a shot. Nothing else has worked so far so why not. And the side effect profile is less than clomid so I feel more comfortable with that... if she had prescribed me clomid I would be having serious second thoughts about it.

 

[mnelson815]

Hey Belle,

Yeah if you are looking to delay O then it is probably worth a shot. I O around 16-18 and I am currently 19 without a positive OPK yet. The past couple months my O has been around 16 so OPK on the 15 so I am at least 4 days behind at the moment and today doesn't seem like we are getting closer to O. It was definitely nice for the no side-effects for sure.

When they did your bloodwork did they check your AMH? My first round they didn't and then they checked mine just a few weeks ago. If they haven't, I would suggest getting it done as it will give you more peace of mind about your "timeline". You AMH drops a long time before your FSH really starts getting affected, so therefore it gives you an idea if you have some time to keep trying on your own or if you need to get more serious about your timelines. It really helped me because I was starting to get nervous and then I got my number back and felt like I had more time on my side than I anticipated. I also read that they are thinking about starting to AMH testing during a woman's yearly check up at some point in her 20's so that she has a better idea of how quickly her "biological clock is ticking". It was simple blood test, can be done any day of the cycle and my doctors had the results in 2 days. Also was covered under AHC so I didn't have to pay
I think that if you didn't do that, it could be your next step and then you could really decide if you would rather wait it out for another year and try naturally or if you want to move forward. Anyway - just something else that could help you make an informed decision that you feel comfortable with

 

[StarGazerRose]

So this morning i learned that if you have lots and lots of money, you can afford over 23 failed attempts at IVF ... (Some comedian on the radio this morning was talking about it -- I had to get out of the car cause I was running late for work)
Any ways ...

Mnelson, I still trust what it says on the screen, I wrote it on the side, so I can see a coorelation between the different tests. I always thought the control was supposed to be darker, to assure that it worked, so assuming such, my test is right, it's "low"... I'm just curious how I can find out what part of the "fertile window" i'm in with it. I know this is the first one, so I'm sure it will fan out and give me more info with more tests i take.

Regardless.... another BD night!
DH's not objecting to my request to hit it every night but He told me I gotta "do some work" so I don't tire him out! I'm gonna probably take tonight off or have him wo ... but i think it will depend on if the Mood strikes

 

[StarGazerRose]

And .... um girls ... I just got laid off ... So I'm gonna be off here for a while. (or since I have vacation time, I'm gonna take it and sit at home and cry)

 

[Illa]

And .... um girls ... I just got laid off ... So I'm gonna be off here for a while. (or since I have vacation time, I'm gonna take it and sit at home and cry)

I am really sorry to hear that... Hang in there, things will take a turn for the best

 

[greenarcher]

Holy shit, I'm so sorry to hear! Damn take some time off before you start looking again.

Mnelson - that's great to know about the AMH, maybe I'll request that testing done if and when I start looking into fertility testing! I usually O on cd 18, so I feel you with the delay! Why did they put you on femara? What other things does it change?

Belle - I think femara is going to be just what you need.

Puma - It's good to hear from you, though I'm sorry its bad news Like belle said, do NOT apologize for taking time for you. I'm glad you've got an appointment coming up soon. There are options, and he'll be able to go through them with you, and you can make the choice that's best for you. Thoughts and prayers your way, love.

Finally Friday, thank god. Husband really wanted a bath last night, so we took one together. I'm hoping one bath won't hurt the little guys too much...

 

[StarGazerRose]

Well the crap is that I had vacation lined up for the first week of November, so I have to take it NEXT week, and then actually go ON vacation...
Just need a place to phycially let it out ... I mean I had a feeling something was going on, but seriously thought WE were gonna be around longer since we put stuff on the site... But they were "Consolidating" ... Just a bunch of SHit ....

Just what I needed when I felt great about this cycle, and now I have to find something to do to afford bills ... Luckily hubby has money saved up so we'll be ok for a while, but DAMN!!!! ... *kicks a wall*

 

[mnelson815]

Green - They just gave it to me for the same reason as Belle. Possibly more follicles and likelihood of more being released so that there are more chances per cycle since it wasn't really happening normally. But with people that usually O on their own, I haven't heard of Femara or Clomid creating many miracles. But there is always a chance. I am just bitter that it is messing with my cycle length at the minute, so I may feel differently later haha.

 

[greenarcher]

Hmm okay, gotcha. Double the odds, kind of thing. I'll have to look into it...

Are you sure you didn't O on cd14? Maybe your midcycle spotting was from O, even without a positive OPK?

Star - that's right your vacation! Hopefully you'll be able to relax. Really good to hear that yall have some reserve saved up

 

[mnelson815]

Ugh, I wish. I checked my temp CD 16 and it was the lowest it had been all cycle. When im not temping I usually just check a couple days before O and a couple days after to make sure I got the shift, because I usually get a really good one. And with it being the lowest of the whole cycle... I doubt it I for some reason always get mid cycle spotting around ) but it is usually after it, like once you O, which is common for that. This time would have been before it which is weird.

 

[greenarcher]

That's a good idea, maybe I'll do that (temp just a couple days to confirm O). I have no idea what pre-O spotting could mean.

One bad thing about not tracking cycles, I thought I was going to O saturday or Sunday. Got my days mixed up, CD 18 isn't until Tuesday! So between Sunday and Tuesday. Dammit...

Waiting to O, waiting to test, always waiting. I need more distractions in my life.

 

[BelleNuit]

Star sorry to hear about your job. That really sucks!

I got a little spotting either the day of O or the day after O this cycle, I'm hoping thats a good thing!

TTC is making me into a bitter old lady. I'm irritable. Freakin irritable. Definitely in the TWW now!

 

[StarGazerRose]

Well at least I have a second job I e been holding on to. I'm asking for more hours the week after vacation. This next week I'm gonna be job hunting. And at least they'll pay me til The end of November. It just sucks.

And well I haven't even paid attention to anything with my cycle today. I just now thought about taking a o test. (And it's almost bed time. )
And unless DH can make me happy we're probably not BDing tonight.

I feel a bit selfish but I honestly can't keep up with your guys stuff today. Maybe tomorrow or Sunday.

I hope your guys weekend goes decent compaired to mine!