TTC #1, Looking for iui Buddies for February!

[mnelson815]

Hahaha love the hastag swimming. Also - I would TOTALLY follow an IG if you set one up! I actually already follow a few of those! I always think about it myself, but I dont know how to make enough fancy stuff for it! And I wouldn't want people close to me to find it.
Deciding in a day is crazy quick! I hope you able to take some time to weigh out your options. Honestly, in the current climate it might be best to take it. And worst comes to worst, you can always quit and be right back at the same position you are now, but have gained some experience and some money in the mean time?

Just something to keep in mind! Nothing is ever permanent

 

[Swimming]

Hahaha love the hastag swimming. Also - I would TOTALLY follow an IG if you set one up! I actually already follow a few of those! I always think about it myself, but I dont know how to make enough fancy stuff for it! And I wouldn't want people close to me to find it.
Deciding in a day is crazy quick! I hope you able to take some time to weigh out your options. Honestly, in the current climate it might be best to take it. And worst comes to worst, you can always quit and be right back at the same position you are now, but have gained some experience and some money in the mean time?

Just something to keep in mind! Nothing is ever permanent

I'm thinking about calling her back and saying "I want to accept the offer, but I want to be transparent - I am going through infertility treatments and may have to make up some work after hours if I come in late that day. Does that sound like something we can make work?"

What do you guys think?

PS- I can't remember if there are any united states residents here but I just learned infertility is a disability according to the American Disability Association (so employers can't discriminate/must make reasonable accommodations but lets be real.... it probably happens).

 

[mnelson815]

I think that sounds great! That way, if they dont want to be accommodating, then you may find out they weren't a great fit for you anyway!

Goodluck!

 

[mrsbertrand]

I think that sounds great! That way, if they dont want to be accommodating, then you may find out they weren't a great fit for you anyway!

Goodluck!

I agree with Mnelson in both cases. What you have to say sounds great, an if anything an employer SHOULD appreciate transparency.

 

[Swimming]

Thanks guys!!!!! I still have my part time interview to have, which is only an hour before I call the full time employer up!

Talk about stress

 

[Ragnhild]

Gl swimming!! And I agree with the others... You should be able to say that without fear of being discriminated and if they do then it wasn't a fit for you anyway. Hope everything works out soooonn

 

[arcticfox]

BFN this morning.

Swimming, fingers crossed for you!!

MrsB - how are you? are you going to test today? when's you beta?

 

[arcticfox]

mnelson - How are you? I live in Alberta too. Have you heard of effortless IVF (clinic soon to open in Calgary), I think the cost of IVF is $6500. If another failed IUI, I might suggest to DH to try IVF next year and start saving for it or loan money from the bank.

Ragn- Any preg discomforts yet?

 

[mnelson815]

Yes I have heard plenty about effortless! Although, when talking with some doctors and getting some opinions, they don't think its a great fit for me. Not only do they not do superovulation, but they don't monitor often, and don't offer icsi. I think we will try IVF the traditional route first, so that we hopefully can do ICSI and maybe have some to freeze, and then if that cycle doesn't work, I would be open to trying effortless since it is way less money.

Are you at the RFP?? I have found so many people lately going here!

 

[arcticfox]

Yes I have heard plenty about effortless! Although, when talking with some doctors and getting some opinions, they don't think its a great fit for me. Not only do they not do superovulation, but they don't monitor often, and don't offer icsi. I think we will try IVF the traditional route first, so that we hopefully can do ICSI and maybe have some to freeze, and then if that cycle doesn't work, I would be open to trying effortless since it is way less money.

Are you at the RFP?? I have found so many people lately going here!

we're with PCRM. Got an appointment 2 months after referral. how about you? I hope you get pregnant with IVF #1.

 

[mnelson815]

Yeah we got in pretty quickly as well! I think within a month and a half of referral we got our appt. But since then it has been so much waiting. Wait two months to get in for this test... repeat this test next month, oh you need surgery but we can't schedule you in for 3-4 MONTHS! Ugh. I am the worst with waiting.

I really hope so too! Thanks

Are you doing one final IUI this month if this one has a negative beta?

 

[mrsbertrand]

Yeah we got in pretty quickly as well! I think within a month and a half of referral we got our appt. But since then it has been so much waiting. Wait two months to get in for this test... repeat this test next month, oh you need surgery but we can't schedule you in for 3-4 MONTHS! Ugh. I am the worst with waiting.

I really hope so too! Thanks

Are you doing one final IUI this month if this one has a negative beta?

Arctic - Sorry about your BFN! Hang in there, when do you think you'll test again? I am doing beta tomorrow morning, hopefully I can sleep tonight! I hate having to wait for the phone call after. I feel more and more nauseated every day, so I better be pregnant lol.

MNelson, I'm sorry you have to wait so long between steps, I can imagine how stressful that is! Definitely hoping it works on your first IVF!

Swimming - How'd it go today?

 

[Ragnhild]

Ohhh fx mrsb!! Keep us posted.

Any updates swimming?

 

[Swimming]

Ahh mrsbertrand please update!!!!

I'm sorry about the negative beta articfox. Fingers crossed for us both next month!

Sorry guys, yesterday was crazy. The part time position wasn't everything I need. I was advised by some legal friends (unofficially, because they can't give actual advice) not to mention anything about fertility treatments. So my plan was to reject the offer based on the fact that I have to do physical therapy for my back (this is totally true, I have arthritis, I just found out). Then she asked what that entailed, I replied that its coming in late and doctors appointments, she said she can "TOTALLY" work with that because the hours are a little flex....

So I accepted. I am scared that she's desperate for someone to fill the position, and may not be okay with the doctors appointments in the end. She wont be my immediate supervisor, so she said we will talk with my immediate supervisor on my first day and we can set expectations. My husband said to be really firm about this on the first day, which is very difficult for me and one of the reasons I was avoiding employment for a little bit anyway. I am generally a work horse, so being anything less makes me feel uneasy. It's just easier to show up on time and stay until work is done, I get super stressed when having to ask for special accommodations.

I have my RE appointment today, I received my injections in the mail yesterday. I am SO GLAD I pushed for this, because my insurance ended up paying for most of the medicine, but insurance starts over April 1st.

But I'm nervous to give my body something that it doesn't need. articfox can you offer any words of wisdom to this point?

I'm sorry to hijack the thread! I guess I have an anxiety problem lol. 0.0

I love that Rag is sticking around to cheer us on!!!!

 

[Ragnhild]

Hey swimming... is this the full time position you accepted? Either way, congrats!! When do you start?? And sorry about the arthritis but it does sound like the right thing to say.
About your anxiety etc, your dh is absolutely right. I'm a bit like you but dh is more firm and also "forces" me to do things i'm not comfortable with. That said, you absolutely have to... just say this was your condition for accepting the offer and you will make up for it in other ways like working from home and putting in some weekend hours if needed but you cannot ignore the body. I am learning the hard way... my supervisor actually asked me to put in sick leave and eat right etc.. lol how embarrassing was that.. because he could see i wasn't coping well and in the end that means work suffers- believe me your bosses will understand and this says nothing about your level of commitment because you are saying it right from the start. Doesn't matter if they are desperate to fill the position...look at this way, that gives you negotiating power instead of being a problem. And i have to be honest, i've seen women struggle with this much more than men because of social myths like women not being professional enough etc. Don't beat yourself up and be clear in your needs. You deserve this job or they wouldn't have offered, no matter how desperate you think they are. If you want to be a bit more professional, write to your supervisor before you actually start so it's clear and doesn't come as a surprise to her/him.

arctic: sorry i missed the post about your beta... and fx for the next cycle!!!!

 

[mrsbertrand]

Ahh mrsbertrand please update!!!!

I'm sorry about the negative beta articfox. Fingers crossed for us both next month!

Sorry guys, yesterday was crazy. The part time position wasn't everything I need. I was advised by some legal friends (unofficially, because they can't give actual advice) not to mention anything about fertility treatments. So my plan was to reject the offer based on the fact that I have to do physical therapy for my back (this is totally true, I have arthritis, I just found out). Then she asked what that entailed, I replied that its coming in late and doctors appointments, she said she can "TOTALLY" work with that because the hours are a little flex....

So I accepted. I am scared that she's desperate for someone to fill the position, and may not be okay with the doctors appointments in the end. She wont be my immediate supervisor, so she said we will talk with my immediate supervisor on my first day and we can set expectations. My husband said to be really firm about this on the first day, which is very difficult for me and one of the reasons I was avoiding employment for a little bit anyway. I am generally a work horse, so being anything less makes me feel uneasy. It's just easier to show up on time and stay until work is done, I get super stressed when having to ask for special accommodations.

I have my RE appointment today, I received my injections in the mail yesterday. I am SO GLAD I pushed for this, because my insurance ended up paying for most of the medicine, but insurance starts over April 1st.

But I'm nervous to give my body something that it doesn't need. articfox can you offer any words of wisdom to this point?

I'm sorry to hijack the thread! I guess I have an anxiety problem lol. 0.0

I love that Rag is sticking around to cheer us on!!!!

Swimming - I'm glad your employer is willing to work around your medical schedule! When do you start? We are constantly taught that we have no rights as employees, but you do, and it is important that you advocate for them!

Heading to the clinic now, it's a 45 minute drive and i'm so nervous! I've had brown spotting since yesterday (quite a bit) which is usually the case before AF, and i've had mild AF cramping on and off, I totally thought I was going to wake up with it this morning. Still no AF, but still mild cramping and still spotting. Each time i've done my beta it's been around the day before and I always get af when I get my negative, and am scared that's what is going to happen, again. Oh well I guess, nothing too do but wait now!

 

[Ragnhild]

Ahh mrsbertrand please update!!!!

I'm sorry about the negative beta articfox. Fingers crossed for us both next month!

Sorry guys, yesterday was crazy. The part time position wasn't everything I need. I was advised by some legal friends (unofficially, because they can't give actual advice) not to mention anything about fertility treatments. So my plan was to reject the offer based on the fact that I have to do physical therapy for my back (this is totally true, I have arthritis, I just found out). Then she asked what that entailed, I replied that its coming in late and doctors appointments, she said she can "TOTALLY" work with that because the hours are a little flex....

So I accepted. I am scared that she's desperate for someone to fill the position, and may not be okay with the doctors appointments in the end. She wont be my immediate supervisor, so she said we will talk with my immediate supervisor on my first day and we can set expectations. My husband said to be really firm about this on the first day, which is very difficult for me and one of the reasons I was avoiding employment for a little bit anyway. I am generally a work horse, so being anything less makes me feel uneasy. It's just easier to show up on time and stay until work is done, I get super stressed when having to ask for special accommodations.

I have my RE appointment today, I received my injections in the mail yesterday. I am SO GLAD I pushed for this, because my insurance ended up paying for most of the medicine, but insurance starts over April 1st.

But I'm nervous to give my body something that it doesn't need. articfox can you offer any words of wisdom to this point?

I'm sorry to hijack the thread! I guess I have an anxiety problem lol. 0.0

I love that Rag is sticking around to cheer us on!!!!

Swimming - I'm glad your employer is willing to work around your medical schedule! When do you start? We are constantly taught that we have no rights as employees, but you do, and it is important that you advocate for them!

Heading to the clinic now, it's a 45 minute drive and i'm so nervous! I've had brown spotting since yesterday (quite a bit) which is usually the case before AF, and i've had mild AF cramping on and off, I totally thought I was going to wake up with it this morning. Still no AF, but still mild cramping and still spotting. Each time i've done my beta it's been around the day before and I always get af when I get my negative, and am scared that's what is going to happen, again. Oh well I guess, nothing too do but wait now!

Ohhh fx mrsb... hope you get that positive and af stays away!!!!

 

[Swimming]

Yes, mrsb I hope this time is a different story for you. I know a girl who spotted at the time she would normally get her period for the first 6 months of her pregnancy, but all is totally well. Fingers crossed for you!!!

 

[Swimming]

Hey swimming... is this the full time position you accepted? Either way, congrats!! When do you start?? And sorry about the arthritis but it does sound like the right thing to say.
About your anxiety etc, your dh is absolutely right. I'm a bit like you but dh is more firm and also "forces" me to do things i'm not comfortable with. That said, you absolutely have to... just say this was your condition for accepting the offer and you will make up for it in other ways like working from home and putting in some weekend hours if needed but you cannot ignore the body. I am learning the hard way... my supervisor actually asked me to put in sick leave and eat right etc.. lol how embarrassing was that.. because he could see i wasn't coping well and in the end that means work suffers- believe me your bosses will understand and this says nothing about your level of commitment because you are saying it right from the start. Doesn't matter if they are desperate to fill the position...look at this way, that gives you negotiating power instead of being a problem. And i have to be honest, i've seen women struggle with this much more than men because of social myths like women not being professional enough etc. Don't beat yourself up and be clear in your needs. You deserve this job or they wouldn't have offered, no matter how desperate you think they are. If you want to be a bit more professional, write to your supervisor before you actually start so it's clear and doesn't come as a surprise to her/him.

arctic: sorry i missed the post about your beta... and fx for the next cycle!!!!

Thanks Rag! I am going to go back and look at this before I start, which is February 20th. I wish I had less stress about being clear, but if I'm learning anything is that I need to be more assertive, and being assertive is helpful not a confrontation. haha. I like the negotiating power instead of me being a problem for sure.

 

[mrsbertrand]

That's the best way to look at it swimming!

Just had my blood test. She said they measure BHCG and progesterone, and if it's positive I go back in two days to see if the HCG doubles.

They will call me around 1pm. Here we go.

Thanks guys xo