TTC #1 on cd19 looking for buddies

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Hey how are you doing? Hope AF stays away for you despite how you think your cycle went!
 
I only found out about geritol through reading threads on this forum and I wish we could get geritol here... I love a good old wives tale! I hope it IS true! :D

I am cd 27 now. I have tested a couple of times through desperation but only big fat stark white negatives here. It is bumming me out a little bit... more so than on previous cycles. I guess I just thought I'd be pregnant by now. So naive!

If I do get AF we are going to plan, plan, plan to have sex at all the right times. Previously we'd set dates and what not, but not really put much effort into it and it seemed we were mostly going through the motions and not really having much fun.

After some discussion, we decided we really have to make more time for each other. Spontaneous sex at the right time is hard to come by. We're both working long hours and then add my commute on top and leaving it up to fate just isn't working.

So, if AF shows up (which I feel like it will) then I'm going to excitedly chart my cycle and we're going to book our 'us time' there and then. Lots of intimacy and not just sex or the sake of ttc, sex than is meaningful and fun and not just the means to an end.

During ttc, it seems like we can only have the above type of sex if it's just after my period has finished. Any closer to OV time and we seem to lose the magic... not anymore!!! haha ;)

I haven't been online much, I know. I found that BnB, as much as I love knowing that I am not alone, and I love reading about other success stories, was getting me down. Symptom spotting and the constant wondering and worrying and specualting and hoping... I do enough of that by myself without hundreds of other women reminding me of all the little things I'd forgotten on purpose.

So I guess I really need my sanity right now and sometimes the boards don't help. I really do feel bummed out at the thought of another negative month... and we're so early on in our journey. Some people try for years to have a baby!! So many people I know have just had babies or are pregnant, my best friend got pregnant without planning to and my other best friend conceived her second baby the first WEEK of trying.

I can feel the pressure a little bit, despite knowing that things happen just when they are supposed to. I am torn and conflicted, heart vs. head (as always) and it doesn't help that I am at this point in my cycle, so whether there is a blastocyst waiting to implant in my uterus or not, my hormones are screwing me over emotionally... and I can feel it.

Ok, I am going to stop rambling now. Sigh. That felt good... it's nice to be able to get it all out once in a while eh? :)

Are all your wedding plans in place? I feel totally stressed out with the thought of ours... but our wedding rings should be with us within the week. At least I am excited for that part! ;)

Take Care xx
 
Bought the Geritol pills for OH to take now too. hoping for extra luck that way :)

Dont get too down, it makes me so sad to read all the stress you are feeling right now, but it also makes me feel better that I am not the only one who gets that way close to AF.

This month we decided not to OPK as the store I went to didn't carry my brand and OH thinks they are a waste of money anyways, so despite the extra vitamins, there isn't really much planning going on over here. My period was RIDICULOUSLY LONG, I was spotting until Saturday morning, but was able to BD Saturday and Sunday night. Not sure if the long period will make me ovulate later as my last long cycle and long period I hadn't been charting yet. Thus far, OH seems very into me sexually this month, which makes me happy to feel like I am not forcing him to have sex just for a baby, not that he should care. We skipped tonight because he got attacked by some wasps today at work and it made him not feel well. I'm on cd10 and as far as my opks go I have gotten +s the last 2 cycles around cd9 so I am assuming by that I will ovulate between cd11and13. My birthday is Friday and with our Holiday this week I am hoping to BD a few more times.

As for wedding plans, that is actually why I am awake (its 1am here). I picked up my wedding dress today and my mind is just on a million wedding things I have to do and I just couldnt sleep. We really have absolutely nothing done, its awful. Hoping to at least have some plans by the end of August.

Still hoping to hear some good news from you soon. FX
 
Well, my temp took a huge nosedive this morning, I've had some painful twinges in my abdomen nad have had a lower backache for the last couple of hours. I also had a little light brown tinted discharge today, so I figure AF will be here tomorrow.

But we'll just wait and see what happens. I feel really sad about af, but I also know that is hormones influencing my emotional state.

I really hope the geritol works out for you both!! I want to heaer about your BFP before your wedding :D
 
TY, tomorrow is my birthday (I was thinking it was Friday earlier this week because thats when we're celebrating, but its really tomorrow lol) also so just trying to enjoy the holiday instead of thinking about BDING 24/7. Still no temp rise, thinking I should take that as a blessing since oh and I skipped bding on both Monday and Tuesday. Made up for it with am bding this morning though. honestly hoping to get in a pm tonight after fireworks too. I was born because of fireworks, hoping my baby will be conceived because of fireworks? LOL I dunno... Praying to God and Geritol that I get a baby this cycle. I still have my softcup in from 10am and I don't plan to take it out til I take a shower tonight.

Hoping its not AF for you!
 
Still no temp jump, think though that not opking is making me more relaxed this cycle a little bit. Today is my birthday so hoping for some baby making birthday sex.
 
Happy Birthday! How cool would it be to conceive on your birthday?! Amazing *fingers crossed*

I've been lightly spotting on and off since yesterday evening. It doesn't usually take this long for red blood to show up, so I'm all confused and hopeful that the spotting will stop, but I also feel like I need to stop getting my hopes up.

I am super emotional and OH is under a lot of stress from work at the moment and so I feel like me and the wedding have kind of gone off the radar for him right now. It is totaly understandable, but there are things that he NEEDS to do, that only he can do (like paying postage so our wedding rings can finally get here!!) and they just don't seem to be a priority for him right now and it's getting me down.

ugh.

Just want to stay in bed the whole weekend and cry. Dontchya just love hormones?

Enjoy the birthday sex!! ;)

xx
 
Ok, after just seeing my ticker say 'a pregnancy test may work today' I felt inspired to check symptoms for 13dpo (I have no idea if that is even right or not) and when I ticked quite a few of the symptoms decided to do a test with the few drops of pee i could squeeze out, just to put my mind at rest.

Both me and the OH (who I woke up to come and check it) can see the FAINTEST shadow of a line... so I am thinking either pregnancy (not trying to get too excited) or evap line. It's just an internet cheapie, red dye, but have read on here of a few people getting evaps with them.

I am so excited to test tomorrow. I am trying not to set myself up for a fall and am preparing myself for a bfn, but also feel like a kid waiting for xmas morning to see if you got the present you were hoping for or not. The big difference is as a kid you generally end up happy with what you receive, this is quite different... wish me luck! In less than 9 hours I'll be testing again!
 
Well this morning I woke up with light bleeding and a bfn on the test, so I guess it was an evap. Pretty bummed out because, of course I was hoping for a better result. There is always next month!

Have a good day xx
 
Sorry to hear that with you bfn, I was getting so excited for you reading those posts.

Birthday was a success, but according to my temps I still haven't Od. Getting a little nervous I might not this month, I'm on cd 14, but still hopeful. I have temped religiously this month to make sure when I do jump i'll get crosshairs.
 
I was really bummed out yesterday because of it, but I am trying to stay positive! We were both really excited to see that little line, I think it's spurred us on to really make this month count!

Remember that a temp jump can happen up to two days after you O, do don't worry to much, because if you o'd yesterday, the jump may not happen till tomorrow. I have everything crossed so tightly for you :D
 
got my temp jump this morning. also didnt go to bed til 5am and was probably dehydrated though so I'm not going to assume I ovulated until I see another high temp tomorrow. We dtd the last three days and still been softcupping so hoping for the best. Feeling hopeful so far. Did af arrive yet, I see your ticker is reset. I still hope that bfn was a false neg for you!
 
Well, my temp is lower today, only 97.8. Its not unusual for it to be in the 97.7s preovulation so I'm not completely convinced I Od but I'll say since its above cover for now that I am 2dpo. Woke up feeling pretty sick today, I dont know if its still from the Birtdhay party Friday or what but I feel like crap.
 
Sadly AF arrived, but it was way lighter and shorter than usual, which is strange, but I tested again just to be sure and it was a very stark white negative.

I never thought I would take so many pregnancy tests!! I've got about 5 left out of 30 I bought when we started ttc. I am going to order some more right now and I think I might invest in some soft cups too. Maybe all of this stuff we do is just placebo effect, but I'm happy to try anything right now ;)

Are you still bd'ing or are you back to every other day?

I marked out all the good days for bd'ing this cycle and we've both pencilled in 'us time'. We are actually going to visit a friend in Florence while I'm due to ovulate this cycle, so maybe that will be the magic needed to make a little sticky bean? How cool would it be to conceive in Firenze?! hehe!

Ok, I am super tired and ready for bed, but our train is only just pulling into the home station.

Enjoy what is left of your Sunday xx
 
I read recently that progesterone actually supresses your immune system, which is one of the reasons why a baby isn't rejected (mostly) by the mother's body. Could this also be linked to why we seem to get the sniffles and stuff post ovulation? Could this also be linked to why you feel crappy? Possible rise in progesterone plus the added stress of the bday party on your body?

I am feeling positive toward this month now. I ordered 50, yes FIFTY internet cheapy tests and a box of softcups. How do you get along with them? Were they tricky to insert correctly at first? I think we're going to have to try them out a few times before the important days of the cycle, just to make sure there aren't any leaks!

We spent the weekend with my future in-laws and talked a lot of wedding talk and I feel a WHOLE lot better about it all. I was feeling overwhelmed with all the stuff left to do and decide and it turns out that OH's folks have gone and sorted out a bunch of stuff for us, without even being asked and it's all working out nicely, so I feel a weight has been lifted from my shoulders! This should help with making a wonderful, strong little egg who is determined to make a baby this month!

I have been listening to some hynotherapy sessions to help me relax. I sometimes listen to it on my lunch break at work, sometimes before I go to sleep. When I do it before sleeping, I sleep so well, despite the heat.

I wonder if these changes I am making caused the shift I noticed in my period this month. Not only were there only two days of real bleeding, but there was virtually no pain. There was some discomfort and pressure, but most months I go through horrid cramps on cd1, where I usually have to change position and control my breathing to get through them. Have you ever heard of the fear-tension-pain cycle? Maybe being more relaxed is helping me to experience less pain?

Or maybe because I was so fixed on hoping it wasn't really AF that I processed the normal sensations of cramping in a different way. So instead of feeling the pressure and anticipating, fearing and therefore creating intense pain, I actually felt them for what they really were.

Can you tell I have been reading lots of books on natural birth? hehe

Ok, I am finally calling it quits for today. I feel super hopeful for both of us this cycle!! Maybe we'll both be getting lovely Spring babies next year?!
 
I'm feeling better today but I accidentally slept until 12pm so that might be why. I'm still being a little cautious of my temps, they're barely over this months coverline, but I'm trying not to be too worried. So 3dpo I guess. 15 days til my expected period though, I'm sure it could come earlier then that.. hoping for no mo0re 22 day cycles.

As for the softcups, I dont seem to be having a problem getting them in though my cervix is naturally much lower then most womens, I can ALWAYS feel mine, sometimes barely having to go in past my first knuckle, so that may be why. However, I sometimes find them difficult to remove... Ive read this could be because it is too close to my pelvic bone, which makes sense but I cant seem to get them in any higher.

Dont be surprised if there is fluid in them when you remove them. In mine I usually have small amounts of white watery fluid, I assume its a mixture of cm and seminal fluid. I can definitely tell its a lot less then the amount of leakage I get when we don't use them, so I am hoping that's a good sign OH has healthy sperm!

So I believe I O'd on the 6th. We DtD the 1st, 4th, 5th,6th, and 8th. hoping that's good enough

I feel the same way about tests. I split ICs with my friend last month, I was like "Oh these should last me 3 mos" and now they are almost gone already because I used 2/3s of them.

I feel like at this point, we're both taking vitamins, we're having sex on the right days, we're using softcups, we're doing everything possible here, if we dont get a positive this month something else isnt right.

Glad to hear a little bit of wedding stress has been taken off you. Its always nice to have one less thing to worry about.

I had horrible cramps last month, but I usually wake up with them, so I don't know if I could go with the theory that my own subconscious causes them... but hey who knows... Personally I know I am a wuss so I dont think I even want to think about natural birth LOL
 
It sounds like you bd'd on all the right days! Just think that there could be a little ball of multiplying cells travelling down your fallopian tube right now! How exciting!!!

I am utterly exhausted :( Didn't sleep well last night and have lots to do at work this week, which sucks!

I am trying not to get too obsessed about this cycle, but I just have a feeling that it's going to be 'the one'. I know, I know, I can't know that for sure, but a little positive mental attitude never hurt anyone :)

Good Luck with the waiting my dear xx
 
Worst thing this month, trying not to symptom spot since my last cycle was 30 days after a 22 day cycle I really got my hopes up, and even though I had been trying to not think about symptoms once I thought i might be late I was spotting symptoms like it was my job! I feel like now that I know I have been ranging for 22 to 30 something days that I will be worrying every single day from Friday on that I am going to get af!!

Its those little things, like today I have ridiculous amounts of lotiony cm and a very high cervix. Prior to ttc if I had CM when I wiped or on my panties I would have just assumed I was close to ovulation because I didnt know anything about what your body does, now if I sneeze the wrong way Im like "omg maybe I'm pregnant"

And also, it makes me feel REALLY bad when people post hpt and everyone keeps telling them they see a line when there is clearly nothing there. There are probably so many woman on this site who think they had chemicals when their test was never positive in the first place... there are better ways to be supportive then to lie.
 
Nothing really to report but a little bit of nausea today I think because I ate too much. OH had an allergy we think possibly to sunflower or pumpkin seeds (which is what I ate too much of) so can't sleep worrying about it. He's sound asleep and breathing normal but I'm still worried lol.

6dpo today,feeling positive still but also sometimes feeling like I'm grasping at threads thinking this could be our month.

Started a ttc journal today, going to keep it going even if we dint get bfp this month just to let everyone know how my cycles are and all that.

11 days before expected af... trying not to test before the 17th
 
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