TTC 40 plus!! Lets share the ups and downs!

[LLbean]

I agree, I have been told and seen many cases of spotting for the whole first trimester.

 

[Spoomie]

Hi ladies

Glowie, still keeping everything crossed for you sweetie. Try to live in the moment and ENJOY being pregnant, rather than fretting and feeling sad. What will be, is already, and worrying won't change that so love your growing baby and coax him along with happiness.

Sam, my heart goes out to you. We have been through what you are now struggling with, but your situation is more acute given the distance between you and the fact that you are grieving a second loss in 9 months. I can tell by reading your post and Twinny's response that you are both Mars and Venus experts and there is little I can add to her excellent understanding and advice. They are so so different to us in every possible way and tough times only highlight this, so (because you are a woman and therefore of superior intellect) bite your tongue if you need to and draw out his strengths rather than focusing on his shortcomings. I know from experience that it's easy to live with a '....and there's another thing...' mentality. I am sure that this will help take the tension out of the situation and close the gulf between you. I DO NOT believe that it needs to be a choice between OH with no baby and no OH and no baby. My bereavement counsellor talked on Thursday about the stress that ttc, and particularly ttcal when you feel that time is massively against you, places on a relationship and she encouraged us to try putting the focus back on our relationship outside of ovulation time, quoting 'that which doesn't kill you........' Ride the storm and I pray that you can come out the other side STRONGER

Twinny, sorry you have both been so sick, glad you are on the mend xxx

Morgans, thank heavens you're following close behind, it's getting lonely here! The rise on cd11 doesn't look convincing enough, I'm saying day 15! Get to it!!!

 

[Reb S]

Glowie, that's really positive news. I've been away for 48 hrs and thinking of you and not able to check up on so I'm REALLY pleased! STICKY VIBES LITTLE BEAN!

Sam - I'm so sorry you're having this trouble. Please don't make any decisions - Miss C has said it all really but just hang in there - only a few weeks ago you were more in love than ever...x

Morgans - glad you've finally got the Peak! Hope you've caught that eggy x

Shelley, looks like many of us are headed that way- me, Miss C maybe, LLbean - could be all 4 of us cycling at once...

AFM - put in an offer on a house. OMG do I want to be THAT broke?!

 

[Miss_C]

think that temp spike may have been connected with my feeling ill cos it is back down today despite cervix being closed and no more ewcm -all too confusing lol

damn I am coming back in my next life as a tortoise and a male one at that!!!

 

[Spoomie]

Spoomie - think I'm almost with you - peak today - pos opk - looking at FF though you would think I OV on Day 11, Ill see what the next few days of temps brings.

Morgans, welcome aboard! Day 14 it is, the perfect cycle

 

[Morgans19]

Lol. My cbfm is confusing me. Highs all the way. I guessed a peak yesterday. Actually was out of sticks. Used stick this morning and hoped for a peak but high!!! Never had all highs like this. Temp rise too so reckon I have ov. I'd say day 13. Have Bd enough over the past few days what will be will be!! Has the cbfm missed my peaks??

Glowie Thinking of you stick little bean ))

 

[Spoomie]

Lol. My cbfm is confusing me. Highs all the way. I guessed a peak yesterday. Actually was out of sticks. Used stick this morning and hoped for a peak but high!!! Never had all highs like this. Temp rise too so reckon I have ov. I'd say day 13. Have Bd enough over the past few days what will be will be!! Has the cbfm missed my peaks??

Glowie Thinking of you stick little bean ))

Hey Morgans

I don't know enough about CBFM to help, the only time I didn't get a peak was when I ovulated really really early and missed the highs/peaks altogether. It seems strange that an opk would pick up a + and the CBFM missed it. But, as always, the only reliable measure is your temp and that's on the rise, so that's the main thing.

I'm hating my chart today, it looks like a dream rise and FFF is probably going to tell me it's possibly triphasic so I will hate her a little bit more - but it's only cos I have the mother of sore throats and picked up yet another of my DS's colds the last 2 days. Expect a mega drop tomorrow or Tuesday

 

[Morgans19]

Heres hoping its positive symptoms Spoomie )

 

[Nise]

Oh Samiam, I'm so sorry you and your OH are having such a hard time - I do hope you are able to come out the other end and have a laugh about it all one day.

Glowie - I'm sorry about the spotting and cramps - Funny, but when I got PG it was the cramps that alerted me to have a test. I thought I was in for a humdinger of an AF! I am loving that your HCG levels are doubling like crazy. Sending more positive vibes and adding stickiness. Hang in there little bean.

I hope everyone has had a nice weekend. I feel so much happier when the sun is shining.

 

[ciarhwyfar]

Spoomie, I got pregnant the month I got a cold. You never know, it could be the thing that helps the sperm get to the goal.

Glowie, I didn't have spotting but I kept having such cramping that I was certain AF was coming so didn't even test until day 35. I still wasn't sure about testing but here we are several months later.

Sam, one day at a time, love. I know you will find a way to have everything work out.

Good luck to all of you heading straight into the TWW.

Pip, looking good, hon. Glad to see you doing so well.

I lurk a lot but don't always post. I really do worry about making some of you feel more frustrated and stuff. Once we get through August, I will be in the home stretch (37 weeks on 30 August) so keeping my fingers crossed that all of my problems are passed as well.

 

[samiam]

Thanks everyone! We're talking about everything but ttc and where we're going to live. In other words, just trying to reconnect and find a way out of the mess by giving ourselves some time not talking about the elephants in the room. Of course, they are still there and we're going to have to sort some things out fairly soon, but at least no-one is saying bad things. It's so flipping hard, innit?

 

[Reb S]

Poor Sam - hope things work out. I'm SURE they will.
Glowie - how're you doing? Haven't heard for a day or two...
Cianrfywerhwrhfar - glad you popped in and so happy that all is going well - baby will be with you soon xxx

One of my very best friends had her 1st baby today. I am very happy for her but a little bit sick at heart. I've almost given up now, I think but things like this remind me how deep the unhappiness is hidden. Sorry x

 

[Spoomie]

One of my very best friends had her 1st baby today. I am very happy for her but a little bit sick at heart. I've almost given up now, I think but things like this remind me how deep the unhappiness is hidden. Sorry x

Dear Reb

It is a huge painful hole and you are allowed to be sad as well as happy for your friend. Two tales from my vast library of 43 year old experience........

Firstly, the couple with whom we spend most of our time had been trying to fall pregnant at the same time as us when we conceived/had our DS. I felt sad and awkward around her while I was pregnant because it hurt me that she wanted what I had, and I wanted her to have it too. I felt it was my responsibility not to whinge about my aching back/how much I missed a glass of wine etc etc in that deeply annoying way so many pregnant people have and, once he was born, not to 'coo' excessively around her when I knew that her pain was as great as my happiness. She is the 44 year old first time Mummy friend I told you about some time ago whose little miracle child took 5 IVF cycles to make it to her. Please don't give up yet; guard your heart in case it doesn't happen, but don't give up. Secondly, and now on the flip side of the equation, one of my oldest friends had her first baby 3 months after my last mc and I still haven't been able to see her. I sneaked around under cover of darkness and dropped a card and present off at her door, then have not been in touch since.

If your friend is a true friend she will know that it is now her responsibility to ease your pain and not your responsibility to act as though everything is truly wonderful.

 

[Spoomie]

Thanks everyone! We're talking about everything but ttc and where we're going to live. In other words, just trying to reconnect and find a way out of the mess by giving ourselves some time not talking about the elephants in the room. Of course, they are still there and we're going to have to sort some things out fairly soon, but at least no-one is saying bad things. It's so flipping hard, innit?

Sam, there are a lot of elephants in the room on this journey. Sometimes they need to be allowed to sit still and rest for a while before you move them on. I'm glad that, despite their presence, things are a little better between you. x (And since when did an American say - it's so flipping hard, innit?' Aren't you supposed to say something like 'Gee, man' ???!!!)

 

[Morgans19]

Spoomie - I am with you now girl on the TWW - 3DPO looks like I ov on Day 13 - just like Glowie told me shes the best FF stalker

Here I go with my imagination running riot...........another long TWW ahead!

 

[Spoomie]

Spoomie - I am with you now girl on the TWW - 3DPO looks like I ov on Day 13 - just like Glowie told me shes the best FF stalker

Here I go with my imagination running riot...........another long TWW ahead!

Welcome aboard Morgans! It's no fun here, though I'm glad of the company. After my beautiful looking chart yesterday I returned to !st ww mediocrity today (as I predicted) and my mind is counting me out already. I am beginning to accept that my mc last November really was possibly my last chance because even conceiving seems to be eluding me these days, let alone getting as far as worrying whether this one will go to term. Beginning to wonder if I have to look for more fulfilment beyond ttc and contemplate life without my longed for sibling for my DS.....

May the next 11 days whizz by for you

 

[Miss_C]

just a quickie gotta finish some work and then I'll be back to do some personals. Had FS appointment this morning - I am doing 100mg clomid this cycle just for the hell of it and to give one last shot on our own, just need the witch to rock up now, she is due Thursday but with an anov cycle who knows. He did say we could start the clomid now and not wait as an option, now this I have never heard of before!! I will wait until Thursday and see if witchy is showing any signs and then take it from there. Seeing clinic next week to start the process of doing a fully monitored cycle with FSH injections and IUI. IVF is OFF the table, too much money for very little increased chances. He thought we should try it but the increase in success between natural/iui and ivf is very very slim. So those NOT wanting the witch please send her my way asap. Thanks

 

[Shelley71]

Glowie - I am crossing every last thing I have for you. It does sound positive though. Hang in there!!

Morgans - I just used my CBFM for the second month and got nothing but highs from CD9 to CD29 and then it just quit asking.

Reb - Yeah, I don't have much hope that this is going to happen on our own. I imagine that August will bring lots of testing for us.

Miss C - I'm with you. I already had my BFN so the witch needs to hurry her happy ass and show.

AFM: I've still got nothing here. Zip. Zilch. Not even spotting like I was when I should have had AF a little over a week ago. I'm on CD39 and I just want AF to show already!! I was so ready to get a new start this next cycle since we have new AC and now I can temp with certainty. But, it's hurry up and wait. And wait and wait. UGH.

I start back to work on Friday and school starts (kids show up) next Thursday. So, if nothing else, at least I'll be SUPER busy in a few days. I'm NOT ready for my summer vacay to end, but if it gets my mind off this, then I'm all for it.

 

[Reb S]

Well, whadda you know?! OH is away and tonight I decided to buy a bottle of wine and down half of it, all by myself! AF is on the way making me feel shite, so I thought I'd beat her at her own game.
Does anyone else think that this thread is a bit quiet nowadays? They shouldn't have moved us to groups as we haven't had any new members for months. Grump.
Anyway - Sam, hope you're doing okay, don't move back to Scotland, it rains.
Glowie - any news? xxx
Shelley, I hope your tests come back better than mine!
How are the 2wwers? I don't count myself this month as I'd have to be the f......g virgin Mary to get preggers this month with the times I've seen OH!!!
Oooop, bit merry! x

 

[LLbean]

I agree...very quiet