TTC 40 plus!! Lets share the ups and downs!

[Spoomie]

Well, I just got bad day three FSH results. So, between that and the struggles between OH and I, I think we're going to throw in the towel. I'm so frickin sad that I don't know what to say. I wish you all the best and I know that you can all have your wee sticky baby. Thanks for being such good and dear kind friends during my roller-coaster of a journey. I just don't think there's any hope for us at this point, so. . . I'll be checking on you girls.

Love to you Samiam, I'm so sad for you xxxxxxx

 

[Macwooly]

Miss C - don't get me wrong I love the position I was advised to use but when you live with 4 large dogs we tend not to use the term Plus until I joined this site I only ever talk about intimate things such as sex with a really close friend or DH so I'm still getting used to discussing such things

Samiam - so sorry to hear your news I pray you can find peace with your situation whatever you and OH decided with all your current struggles

 

[pip7890]

Sam. Only you know what is the right decision for you. We'll support you in whatever you decide. Please take care of yourself. You are one hell of a lady.

Pip x

 

[Babinogi]

Hello Women o' the 40+ Variety,

Just thought I'd share something that might help all of us. I have done creative visualization and it works. Especially if you draw down your dreams.
Here's a creative visualization meditation.

Try doing this every day, along with other positive thinking techniques.

https://www.creativevisualization.c.../simple-creative-visualization-exercise-video

Have fun with it! It can't hurt!

xox
Babinogi

 

[onmymind17]

Sam - I'm really sorry to read your post - I'm not far behind you and I'm sure lots of people will say 'DON'T GIVE UP!' and maybe they're right, but the most important thing is yours and OH's happiness together. You have so much together from what you've told us and I'm sure you can get it back. Don't forget you're still full of hormones from MC and they will be making you feel blue - so don't leave us!
Welcome to Onmymind - I can't believe you've had so many losses. Have they tested you? In the UK if you have 3 they start investigations... Love your furbaby!
And new ladies, welcome to Miss C, the instigator of the renewal of this thread! As you can see, she's a lady who speaks her mind and says the things that none of the rest of us dare!
AFM - the witch is due today and I can feel her brewing in my nether regions. Old cow.

Yes i have been tested and all is well, they just say its my old age i still produce a lot of eggs when i was doing the IUI's i never had less than three mature ones, i guess i just have to pray for that golden one to stick. And thanks, my furbaby's name is Kirby, i rescued him from a shelter when he was 5 weeks old, and weighed 3lbs, he is now 6 and he weighs 62lbs. Yours is adorable too!!! Is it a puppy? Looks like a lab.

Yea Miss C, i love it when people speak their minds, i am right with you!!

 

[ciarhwyfar]

Sam, my heart feels for you. May you and yours find peace with what ever decision you come to.

Onmymind, I have done some research and while age is a factor, I think it is used as the "we don't want to figure things out" card. It isn't the end all and be all of having a healthy baby. I had my last one at 39 and this one will be at 42/43 depending on if it is before or after due date. We had an early mc in Feb '10 (7 weeks that they said looked like about 4) and it took 11 months for a new bfp. I had honestly pretty much given up and thought AF was due any day for over a week before testing. With that kind of egg producing (which is really good), I wonder if you have had not enough hormones in early pregnancy because they dropped off? That does seem to be age related.

Welcome to the new ladies!

 

[onmymind17]

Sam, my heart feels for you. May you and yours find peace with what ever decision you come to.

Onmymind, I have done some research and while age is a factor, I think it is used as the "we don't want to figure things out" card. It isn't the end all and be all of having a healthy baby. I had my last one at 39 and this one will be at 42/43 depending on if it is before or after due date. We had an early mc in Feb '10 (7 weeks that they said looked like about 4) and it took 11 months for a new bfp. I had honestly pretty much given up and thought AF was due any day for over a week before testing. With that kind of egg producing (which is really good), I wonder if you have had not enough hormones in early pregnancy because they dropped off? That does seem to be age related.

Welcome to the new ladies!

Thats what i have been told too, is that for my age i am producing a lot of eggs, we had one cycle that i had 8 eggs that matured, there were 12 to start with, the last one we did in Nov 2010 i had 8 eggs, and 3 of them matured and that was only on clomid for 5 days, followed up with a low dose (75ml ) of Gonal F. The only one we know that the progesterone was too low, was the one that went 9 weeks, that one my ob checked after the RE said the baby had disappeared and he found that the progesterone was only 5.5, we tried to save it but it was too late. I had asked the RE's office 3 times to check the progesterone and they refused. The IUI in nov of this year i insisted on having progesterone, and that one still did not stick. Can you suggest anything for me to take that might improve my chances. I just ordered the Clear Blue Easy monitor, and i am going to try that, for some reason we can get pg with IUI's but cant seem to do it on our own, i dont know if we have the timing wrong, or if maybe i am not ovulating, although that does not make sense since every cycle right on time af shows. I am just not sure what to do anymore, my dh and i have talked about going to a different RE, one who maybe cares about getting me pg rather than their numbers.

 

[Macwooly]

OMM - maybe a different RE will be the answer. I know if I was in your position I would be looking to change especially if progesterone was an issue at one time and you are being refused testing and it may possibly still be an issue.

I pray you will get your BFP soon and hold your LO 9 months later

 

[beetle]

Beetle - I'm at the Lister too - OH's spermies turn out to be a little misshapen so we may be doing one last blast IVF in Oct/Nov. Who are you seeing there?

Hi Reb S, I'm seeing a Dr Jaya Parikh. Who is your doc? Any good? This whole thing is rather daunting. So next Friday I believe I'm having a U/S scan and OH has to deliver spermies into a cup with the help of a few mags! Not really sure what the process will be bearing in mind that I'll be around CD21, and haven't had any bloods or other tests done recently. (Had AMH done a year ago and my reserve was 16.9 which I believe is "satisfactory" but who knows what it is now, plus it doesn't tell you the quality of the eggies either!). I reckon that we've probably got one or 2 more months of trying naturally before we get the go ahead. Still don't know what the difference is between IVF and ICSI. I remember someone telling us last year because my OH's swimmers were not brilliantly motile that we would have to go to ICSI but still think they sound like the same thing!

 

[Reb S]

Onmymind - yes, our furbaby is called Jasper - he's a year old collie/lab cross (lolly!) but I keep the puppy picture cos it's SO cute! He's a lovely boy.
Definitely change your doctor!!! Low progesterone can be fixed so easily with lovely 'shove-em-uppers'..!
Beetle - I wanted to see Dr Parikh, who's meant to be great with us oldies, but because we wanted to get it done quickly over the summer, we ended up with Dr Tolba, who we've now fired!! We're now with Mr Faris (?) who is certainly more interested and caring than Tolba - we're doing some immunes testing at the mo. ICSI is when they pick a good-lookin' sperm and inject it directly into the egg. Depends on your hubbies swimmers, but I have a feeling the Lister do it as a matter of course as fertilisation rates are higher. Great AMH!!! Mine's about 3.something-rubbish.
Miss C - what decision did you come to re the clomid?

How are our 2 Week-waiters? I'm just waiting on Aunt Flo, she's late for once (for me) which is great as it pushes our poss IVF one day more into being in the UK for it!

 

[Miss_C]

hey everyone, still waiting for the witch, decided to do nothing until our appointment on monday.

I just wanted to share an artilce I found written by a FS which I thought was really interesting. I sjared it wth Sam on our FB group in response to her worries about her fsh, but figured you ladies would find it interesting too. I bolded the bits I found MOST interesting.

The hormones that participate in the reproductive process are like dancers in a dance production. Every hormone has its role and it's the choreography of their interaction that creates the dance that can lead to conception. This choreography happens through a communication loop between the hypothalamus, pituitary and ovaries, which is called the HP axis.

The health and integrity of the HP axis is what determines the choreography of all parts of the menstrual cycle, including ovulation. By doing an FSH test on day 3 of your cycle, you're measuring just a sliver of this dance production.

The distinction that needs to be made in terms of normal FSH levels is are we measuring a woman's predictive response to fertility drugs or are we measuring her fertility? I meet too many women that were told that they had a 1 in 100 chance of getting pregnant, based on their high FSH levels. Many of these women went on to conceive naturally.

When you listen to doctors explain what high follicle stimulating hormone test results mean, you will usually here two key points. First, they will often say that test results over 10 predict that the woman will respond poorly to IVF. Then they will say that high FSH "can indicate" low ovarian reserve. Short of dissecting the ovaries, there is no definitive way to know if a woman is running out of eggs.

The truth is that ob-gyns now push for FSH testing and are using it as a benchmark for women's fertility, when in fact it tests a woman's responsiveness to IVF drugs. Women with high FSH won't respond well to IVF drugs, but this doesn't mean that she won't conceive on her own. The choreography of your hormones is what determines the quality of your menstrual cycle and the possibility of getting pregnant.

 

[Spoomie]

hey everyone, still waiting for the witch, decided to do nothing until our appointment on monday.

I just wanted to share an artilce I found written by a FS which I thought was really interesting. I sjared it wth Sam on our FB group in response to her worries about her fsh, but figured you ladies would find it interesting too. I bolded the bits I found MOST interesting.

The hormones that participate in the reproductive process are like dancers in a dance production. Every hormone has its role and it's the choreography of their interaction that creates the dance that can lead to conception. This choreography happens through a communication loop between the hypothalamus, pituitary and ovaries, which is called the HP axis.

The health and integrity of the HP axis is what determines the choreography of all parts of the menstrual cycle, including ovulation. By doing an FSH test on day 3 of your cycle, you're measuring just a sliver of this dance production.

The distinction that needs to be made in terms of normal FSH levels is are we measuring a woman's predictive response to fertility drugs or are we measuring her fertility? I meet too many women that were told that they had a 1 in 100 chance of getting pregnant, based on their high FSH levels. Many of these women went on to conceive naturally.

When you listen to doctors explain what high follicle stimulating hormone test results mean, you will usually here two key points. First, they will often say that test results over 10 predict that the woman will respond poorly to IVF. Then they will say that high FSH "can indicate" low ovarian reserve. Short of dissecting the ovaries, there is no definitive way to know if a woman is running out of eggs.

The truth is that ob-gyns now push for FSH testing and are using it as a benchmark for women's fertility, when in fact it tests a woman's responsiveness to IVF drugs. Women with high FSH won't respond well to IVF drugs, but this doesn't mean that she won't conceive on her own. The choreography of your hormones is what determines the quality of your menstrual cycle and the possibility of getting pregnant.

Well said Twinny! I read a post somewhere on the Over 35s board the other day by a woman dismissed by her doctor as she had an FSH of 30. She went on to conceive naturally I didn't feel so bad that mine was 13 after I read that! They dismiss us as over the hill because in the NHS money is short and privately, perhaps because our chances are reduced and therefore the success rates may be lower and affect their stats for attracting more business??? I'm facing another failed month and trying not to sink into depression, but if we continue to target BD around ovulation every month, the odds of capturing an egg at some stage have to be with us! I'm hoping my body will eventually just give in to me badgering it for a baby And I try to remember what Glowie said once that every failed month is a month closer to success What else can we do? Personally I am not prepared to go down the assisted conception route so will continue to do all I can to facilitate it naturally and pray for success for a sibling for my little man. I am now adding the visualisation to my armoury after checking out the link posted by one of the newbies (sorry, can't remember who it was!) and figure that the worst it can do is make me more relaxed and content in my life

 

[Spoomie]

Here's a link to the post, and I was wrong, her FSH was 49!!!

Sam, I'm pretty sure you're into hypnotherapy, keep going with it x

https://www.babyandbump.com/trying-conceive-over-35/689903-dont-give-up.html

 

[Macwooly]

Miss C thank you posting the info on FSH. I've never had mine tested but DH & I have decided not to go down the assisted conception route so to be honest I won't bother having my FSH tested.

I hope all goes well with your appointment on Monday

 

[Reb S]

Morning all, newbies and oldies well, we're all oldies here aren't we?!
Lots of interesting links, info - thanks girls x
Spoomie - sounding good, girl - don't get depressed!!!
Well, she got me, no surprises there as we had one shag round O time as I was away most of the month. Onwards and upwards. Going to temp this month until O, then STOP. OH is working away from home at the mo anyway, so I'd have to travel to Brom to get some anyway...
Must get out and take impatient furbaby for walkies. xx
HOW IS EVERYONE?

 

[Jennjenn]

for me this morning at 13 dpo. This was our 10th cycle trying! Baby is due around my 42nd birthday next year.

 

[Butterfly67]

Hello ladies, I just found this thread by chance. I don't tend to look for too many new threads as it takes me long enough to keep up with the ones I am on

Having said that it is nice to find some fellow oldies - some of you I know but it is nice to see that there are lots of others out there

I'm 43 and trying for my first with my ex boyfriend as the future baby father (hopefully). Been trying for 4 months but no joy yet and out for this month as he is away. Just getting tests done now and might consider IVF.

Jennjenn - massive congrats to you

 

[Macwooly]

JennJenn - huge congratulations to you Wishing you a happy; healthy and full term pregnancy x

Butterfly hello

 

[pip7890]

Congratulations Jennjenn. Morning seems to have had a better outcome in respect of s for me too.

Pip x

 

[Reb S]

Whoohay!!! Jennjenn, this thread really needed a new BFP. Many congrats and a happy and healthy 9 months!!! xxx