TTC 40 plus!! Lets share the ups and downs!

[Miss_C]

hey everyone, been reading but not been posting been busy, thinking of moving huse in December so I have been clearing through cupboards and drawers and culling beofre packing. Jake has been having the strangest nights waking 3 or 4 times with the screaming ab dabs, nothing wrong, nothing hurts, no owies or anything, clings on like a limpet and then lays down and goes back to sleep. Weird.

ciaftaywyyciiicee = the pics are just beautiful thank you for sharing and well done you!!! And as Reb said please pop back every now and then and share life updates.

My chart has gone mental this morning but I think I may be getting sick, have had squirty bottom for past 2 days and feel a bit fluey, my boobs are so so so so sore this month pretty much since the day of O and getting worse, I feel like I want to rip them off!!

Jake has surgery booked for 27th of this month so hopefully that all goes well and then the following week serious bunnying should occur. Have 2 more prescriptions of clomid left so if neither of them work then that's it for us, we will start the new year with an acceptance of that's they way things are and officially go into ntnp mode.

 

[Spoomie]

Hi Twinny

Poor Jake, hope sleep settles down and that his op goes ok. Will be thinking of you. You sound in a better place. It seems that you, Reb, Sam and I are all moving into a different place, there has been so much heartache here recently, it's hardly surprising. I am hopeful that this new attitude of que sera will work in our favour as we stop fighting our bodies and let things be. For me, this will be my last month of CBFM if I can manage it; my cycle seems to be more settled since mc and giving up the herbalist so it seems an unnecessary expense and stress to keep poas! Catch up soon xxx

 

[Butterfly67]

Hi ladies, just a quick post to say goodbye. I have a stark white BFN for this month and temps are dropping so I am out and the ex has decided that he wants to move on with his life (fair enough) so we will no longer be ttcing. I wish you all the luck and in the world and will pop in every now and again to see how you are all doing.

xx

 

[Reb S]

Oh Butterfly, I'm so sorry - your chart looked so nice for a few days there. Seems like most of us on the thread are moving in that direction, it's quite strange. Lots of luck and love in your future x
I wonder if there'll be anyone left if we do decide to do our IVF - I can't do it without you lot... x
Miss C - I know you feel ill, but the Spoomie-theory of life thinks that's quite a good thing TTC, I seem to remember - FX and here's to Jake settling. Good luck for the op, I've forgotten what he's got to have... sorry. x

 

[Desperado167]

Butterfly ,am so so sorry ,please keep in touch ,Reb ,I will be here for another while if u will have me ,

 

[Kaelia67]

Hi all, just dropping in.... I was on the boards around 3+ years ago and after around 2 years of ttc followed by a mc, we decided to throw the towel in. I'm 44 and although I have children, my partner doesn't and after much discussion we have decided to try one last time. Good luck everyone and many congrats to all that have their long awaited Bfp x

 

[Desperado167]

Hi all, just dropping in.... I was on the boards around 3+ years ago and after around 2 years of ttc followed by a mc, we decided to throw the towel in. I'm 44 and although I have children, my partner doesn't and after much discussion we have decided to try one last time. Good luck everyone and many congrats to all that have their long awaited Bfp x

That's wonderful news ,good luck huni ,

 

[Spoomie]

Butterfly, so so sorry that you have had bad news this month and that your ex has withdrawn his 'assistance'. If there has to be bright side to where you find yourself right now, then try to think on this: by forcing a line to be drawn under ttc for you perhaps he has spared you from the purgatory we all seem to be battling with, how to let go of this and move forward. It's too easy to say, 'One more month, we'll give up after that...' and before we know where we are, a whole year of our lives have passed by and despite having lived in limbo, we are still in the same boat. So, while I feel so sad for you that your journey is over with a different outcome to that which you would've hoped for, he's also forcing you to set yourself free xxx

 

[Spoomie]

Twinny, where's your chart? I can't find it, have you taken the link away?

 

[Reb S]

Hi Kaelia and welcome back - good luck for the final fling!
Blimey, this thread really does seem to be heading for an autumnal feeling. Strange.
Despie - thank you SO much for your kind words - Yes, I'd love your support if we decide to go for it.
And to those of us who are coming to the end of our road - can we still support each other as we deal with the aftermath?!
Right, have to go play with my dog, who is demanding attention. xxx

 

[Spoomie]

Reb, not bowing out totally, just trying to reclaim something that I have lost. For now, that involves giving up on CBFM and cutting out some of the zillions of supplements I currently take as each bottle comes to an end. When I found this lifeline of a thread after our last mc, I really believed that there would be one supplement or device that would be the missing link and that everything wold then fall beautifully into place. I also imagined that I would keep going with the same intensity until I got my reward. After searching desperately for 11 months I am now moving to a position of believing that these extraneous things really make very little difference. It *may* happen for me, but if it does then it will be more down to a lucky month when everything lined up in perfect harmony: the egg was just a llliiiiiiittttlllle bit better than normal, the sperm swam a lliiitttllleee bit stronger and the lining was just a lllliiiittttllle bit more plush, not because I took vitamin C or iron religiously or used softcups. I may be attempting to take a more pragmatic stance from hereon in but I can't imagine leaving the thread for a good while yet! I am still gearing up for ovulation like hopeless fool..........x

 

[Spoomie]

Sam, how are you doing? xx

 

[Spoomie]

Re: the new look BnB which appeared today (I didn't see it the last time Reb mentioned it). I'm just loving the images of glorious pregnancy bumps that flash up on the home page, NOT, now there's something that helps my state of mind!!! I'm trying to be balanced and gracious....... I'm sure it's a huge thrill to those on the LTTTC board.....<sigh>

 

[Miss_C]

Twinny, where's your chart? I can't find it, have you taken the link away?

it's there now - this new site must have played with more than our minds!!!

Also overlaid ziggy's first chart with this one cos I thought it looked familiar - yes I know stupid but I really truly am not expecting anything this month, just showing that a chart means NOTHING!!

 

[samiam]

I'm okay ladies. I think I sprained my ankle on tonight's full moon hike, but OH is ministering to me like a champ. And we're going to get on the BD wagon here starting this weekend and try to beat that damned huevo to the punch. But I am EXACTLY where you are Spoomie, in terms of supplements and using my last CBFM sticks. I'll temp, but I'm mostly just letting the intensity of it all go. It was ruining things, so. . .

And Reb, of COURSE we'll all be here. In fact, maybe we need to start our own thread, NTNP after a loss for 40s.

 

[Butterfly67]

Ladies, thank you so much for your support - and Spoomie - you are so right. I could see myself saying, just until I am 44 then after that well maybe a few more months etc etc and never being able to let go and the fact that I have to let go I am now looking on as a positive thing. I gave it a good shot for as long as I could

Thanks also to Sam for the message, definitely something to think about

So, having said all that, I have one more month! After a chat with the ex, we are in for October, as long as I can get myself back to the UK in time. I am packing up and leaving the middle east but need to get everything sold and finished before O which may be around 23-25th Oct.

 

[Desperado167]

Sam ,Sorry about your ankle ,Spoomie bf and miss c and Reb ,am also feeling it's the end of the road myself and this month I have just ate and drank wotever I want ,I haven't been taking my supplements except for my f.a and I haven't been using my cbfm But I have been temping .I am starting to accept the chances of another l.o will never happen so wots the point .my life has been on hold for 5 and a half years and with each loss I lose a little bit more of myself I don't want to look back and think I have wasted those years with the kids , I am with them all 24/7 but my mind is constantly on ttc ,my two brothers wife's are due in three weeks and I am already A Nervous wreck at the thought of going to the hospital,and to make matters worse they are being christened on xmas morning and we all have to attend the service ,I don't know how I will hold back the tears .but I am planning on being here for a while and like everyone I just keep saying just one more month ,Kaelia ,hi ,hope u are doing ok ,xxx

 

[keekeesaurus]

Butterfly . So happy that you are staying for another month. Really, really hope you get your longed for BFP....you deserve it lady! I will be keeping everything crossed for you.

Despie - massive honey, that's such a hard situation to be in with imminent births looming like that.

To all you other lovely ladies massive , I'm only just getting an idea of how hard the TTC journey is . My last chart was really good but this one is completely different and no sign of ov arriving any time soon. Ridiculously I though that if I ov'd CD #12 last cycle I would again this cycle. Bah.

Lots of love to you all xxx

 

[Butterfly67]

Aw thanks keekee

Despie, hang in there, I am just so hoping this month is the one for you. You are a strong person and you can get through this whatever happens.

 

[Butterfly67]

meant to add keekee I think your chart still looks good for a day 12 O, it doesn't look far off with the temps dropping and the EWCM