Waiting for AF after M/C, anyone else? OCBM

[bluestars]

Hey Aleeah. I do think you are being a little soft. I understand that he might be scared of the news but does that mean that you have to be scared alone? I don't think that's fair you should be supporting each other. Your going through the physical side of things too he needs to remember that.

Does that sound to harsh? Xxx

 

[teacup]

Teacup - So EXCITING to see your positive OPK ! I've honestly never been as happy as the time I got my very first positive OPK, I still get comments to the post I posted then (back in July) as people think my reaction was so funny but so true. And my god, that is a positive OPK you've got there, no doubting that. Now get to baby dancing duties!

So in a bit of a weird place, my husband did say he wouldn't be able to attend all my scans (if we make it that far) as he's busy with work. Which I get and respect, they plan to scan me every week from next week, so I appreciate his work are less accomodating than mine, so I can go on my own.

BUT he told me last night he doesn't want to go to ANY scans until 3 months as he's so scared of what's happened before. He loves me to pieces and he's obviously more cut up about things than I'd realised and I'm strong enough to go on my own and take whatever news they give me each week but am I being too soft?! I think I'll be fine if everything's ok but I don't want to resent him if it's not and I'm on my own?? xx

Thanks Aleeah! Yep I easily persuaded OH into BDing last night, Will do again tonight and then tomorrow night as well to make sure. We're using the same method that worked last time (TMI - OH 'finishing' from behind) so really hoping I get a BFP on my birthday in 12 days time. At least if AF comes then I can have lots of drinks over Halloween so either outcome would be fine (although I'd prefer a BFP!)

I think that your OH should come to some of your scans, I think it would be very unsupportive of him to not be involved at all in the first 3 months. Maybe ask him to come to your 7 week scan, because that is when they can see the heartbeat and it would be sad for him to miss seeing that. xx

 

[bluestars]

I agree even if he comes for the first one and then every so often after until 12 week scan!


Girls in still nearly getting positive on cheapies opk and flashy faces on clear blue tests

Xxx

 

[Aleeah]

Blue - I don't think you were harsh at all. I don't get men, he seems to fight such a strong arguement I concede when I talk to him but when I have some time to think on my own I also think he should come with me. I said the same thing to him, he doesn't want to come because he doesn't want to hear anymore bad news but what about me? I can't avoid it as I have to be there for the scan. He's very insistent I go to the scans!

Also, I probably wouldn't count that OPK as a positive to be honest (you can all correct me if I'm wrong pls). As I had tonnes of OPK's like that for ages and ages and they were all 'negative' as the positive I got was like Teacup's, and I only got that for 2 days. I don't know anything about the CB monitors though, sorry.

Teacup - I'm impressed you can get hubby to do the deed 3 days in a row! Me and hubby only ever manage 2 and he's defeated !! Good plan about the 7 week scan, as that's when we've lost the others, that would be the one next week and he's point blank refusing to go!! He's being sweet at home, really trying to look after me, just wish he'd grow his b*lls back that he so obviously possesses and snap out of it about the scans!!

Thanks ladies, I think you're right, I'm being soft, I'll try wearing him down and if that doesn't work I'll take a friend! xx

 

[crysshae]

Blue - Your chart is looking lovely with those stable temps. I wouldn't call that a positive OPK either. They say OPKs will have a line when you're pregnant. I hope that's what is going on with you!

Good luck Teacup! I hope you catch that egg!

Slg - I hope everything gets moving for you soon so you can start again.

Nina and LL - How are you? Cycle buddies again this month?

Aleeah - I think he should go with you too... If I went into my reasons why, I would just be repeating what you all have already said. For better, for worse, in sickness and in health....etc.

Lindsay - I'm so glad you are to the enjoyable part of pregnancy. It has gone by so fast! So exciting! I didn't feel my first baby move until right at 20 weeks, so if you're not feeling anything yet, it's no big deal, pretty normal for a first full-term pregnancy. With each pregnancy, I felt them move earlier.

AFM - Looks like my new cycle started today, so no mishap surprise. All is well.

 

[teacup]

Here are the opks from my cycle when I conceived and also my opks from this cycle after the miscarriage. It's probably really gross that I kept all these but I find them fascinating, and also really useful to refer back to my successful cycle. It seems I ovulate around cd 17 - cd 18. But I have only done opks two cycles so haven't got a lot to go on! I got an almost positive 9 days after the miscarriage and a few more dark ones early on than my other cycle.

I have noticed that instead of a gradual darkness, my opks seem to go from 0 to 60 when I ovulate! I always thought it was meant to be a steady increase.

 

[Lindsay109]

Blue, I don't think I would call that a positive OPK either... although I never did the strip ones, I just had the digital one. I think LH goes up and down in the luteal phase and as Crys said, they also go more positive when you're pregnant

Aleeah, I also think your hubby should be going to the scans (at least some of them) with you for all of the reasons you said. It's his baby too, and whatever is going to happen is going to happen whether or not he goes to the scans or not, so he'll have to get the news one way or another. Plus, I don't know about you, but I certainly feel less anxious if hubby is there with me.... a little support is really nice.

I don't think I'll be getting anymore scans until 20 weeks, so it'll be a while before I have any pics to post. I do hope you'll be posting yours!!

Teacup, sounds like you've got a good BD plan! Hopefully you catch the egg this month

Crys, glad to hear all is well with you, at least you won't have to explain anything to the doctor Hopefully this cycle flies by so you can get back to trying again!

Actually the last 15 weeks have not seemed to go by fast for me, lol. I'm trying to worry less and I think if all checks out okay on thursday that will really help! At times it still doesn't feel real... I had an OMG moment this weekend when I realized we could have a baby in April. That triggered a little cleaning spree and I went through the whole closet in the extra bedroom and got rid of a bunch of stuff.

 

[Literati_Love]

Lindsay - I had a great Thanksgiving. Lots of eating for me as well. Unfortunately, I was so full that I couldn't eat as many delicious foods as I wanted to! Glad you had a good thanksgiving as well.

That is so exciting that you will have a baby in April! Glad to hear a bit of 'nesting' kicked in for you. It is too bad it is going by so slowly for you, but I hope that now that you are feeling better and have passed the most major obstacle that it will start flying by and you can enjoy things more.

Aleeah - I agree with everyone else that your husband should be there for at least 1 or 2 first tri scans. You are in this together and you shouldn't have to face the scary parts alone. I do hope you can get him to see that, but if not bringing a good friend is a good idea.

Crys- well, at least now you can start fresh and you just have one more cycle to wait! How long are your cycles normally?
I am doing ok. I have sort of been ignoring my cycle so far. I think I'm just sick of it all. Even temping feels like a huge chore. Nina and I are cycle buddies again but she seems to have disappeared

Blue - I agree w everyone that that is no longer positive. It's normal to still have a bit of LH in your system after you ovulate. I would just stop testing! I do hope your blood tests reveal that you have ovulated this month!

Teacup - thanks for posting your OPK progression. That is a good reference.

AFM - I guess I'm already cd9 but it doesn't feel like it. No signs of fertility yet but we did BD last night. I am hopefully not going to get as obsessed this month. I am too tired for that.

 

[Aleeah]

Crysshae - A little sad you didn't get a nice little surprise but also happy you're onto a new cycle that could be 'the one'! You're so right with your in sickness and in health comment too, thank you!

Teacup - Useful seeing your OPK's, I don't think it's gross at all, I've still got tonnes of used pregnancy tests with dates on from this year, I should throw them out but I like to compare too (even though some have evaporated!!). Also, not all women show a steady increase or decrease with the OPK tests. I certainly looked like I was close to peaking but then would get a blank, I got through 50 of the little blighters in the time following my m/c ! (It did take me over 6 week to ovulate though!) And they varied a lot but a good strong one is all you need and you have one of those.

Blue - Please do let us know how you get on with your test results, your temps look really good and you've no doubt baby danced enough xx

Lindsay - I can imagine the weeks are passing very slowly for you but it's so lovely you're making such good headway with the second trimester. I always find it confusing, as to when the second trimester starts, 12 weeks? 13 weeks? 14 weeks? Who knows but at least you can confidently say you've made it to it!! A bit of nesting is a good thing, can't wait to hear about how much stuff you've bought closer to the time... babies appear to have SO much stuff, you'll be glad for the space you're making now!

Literati - Taking it easy and not obsessing is so good, I'm sure that's why I wasn't ovulating following my miscarriage. I was SO obsessed with it and then I gave up and did lots of shopping and eating chocolate and whatever I wanted and I ovulated and caught. I know it's hard to hear but relaxing really does help. I know we're not on the same cycle as you but we're here to help too, so feel free to vent or symptom spot, whatever you fancy xxx

AFM - I only now wish I was married to one of you lovely ladies (though the getting sperm might be difficult!). I've resigned to the fact he's not coming, maybe I've resigned to it too quickly but I almost want to cherish that look on his face when we saw the tiny little sac. If he comes with me and it's bad, I'll feel terrible for him and not think about myself. So for now, I think I'll go without him.

I don't want to drag any of my friends along now either, I told one friend about the pregnancy and she burst into tears, as she's been so sad and worried for me. I feel terrible I'm upsetting people so much, I don't want to make anyone else cry anymore. So decided to go on my own, I've done it before, I can do it again!

xxx

 

[bluestars]

Well I usually randomly test throughout my cycle and usually after o it's neg all the way! But this months just seems to be positive all the time... Not sure my hormones are playing game at all.. I know on the bcheapies it's not a real positive it's a high on the cbft. I'm giving in and not worrying about it. Will let you know when bloods back. Don't think I will test until they are back.

Aleeah I'd have came with you no matter good or bad news! I have no balls or rod though so I'd fail as a man... Hehe :hehe: I really hope it goes well for you and you can go back with good news!

Glad you all had a good thanksgiving we don't do that here. Wish we did though any excuse for family get to tethers is brill to me !

Teacup it's not weird you keep them just wish I did now so I could compare.

Beautiful weather here today = amazing sunset! Picture to follow soon! Xxxx

 

[bluestars]

Beautiful for Scotland xxx

 

[Literati_Love]

Beautiful sunset, blue! Thanks for sharing.

 

[slg76]

One of my best friends lives near Dundee. Your picture makes me feel like I have a snapshot of her day

 

[bluestars]

Hehe Scotland's not all that bad for sunsets eh?


Well aparently here it's wave of light day... Not sure if it's the same as you guys... I lit a candle for my boys and your babies. Anyone else want to join xxx

 

[crysshae]

They call it Infant and Pregnancy Loss Day here. I like Wave of Light much much better. I lit candles too.

 

[Literati_Love]

I lit a candle as well but did not take a picture. I wanted to really make today feel special but I didn't really. But I suppose I can make any day a day to remember my baby. But I am glad there is a day so that other people can remember as well.

 

[Aleeah]

What lovely photo's and what a lovely idea. I've never heard of it before, can't believe I missed it, will make sure I know about it now for the coming years.

And what a beautiful sunset Blue, defintely brightened up my day.

xxx

 

[bluestars]

I know we remember our babies everyday! But to think go how many candles where lit is amazing. But I light those candles all the time. Aleeah I'm sure you can to!

Crys beautiful! Xxx

How are you all today? Xxx

 

[Aleeah]

I was a bit sad, got my blood test results back and they're all clear . So no definite cause of the miscarriages. I wanted it to be the clotting disorder so I could at least take something different but apparently results on that are clear. So I'm back to doing this on my own.

There's me sat around, down in the dumps and then I feel sick, really sick and throw up!! I've never been so pleased to see vomit!!! I've never been this sick so early and I know it doesn't mean anything, millions of women are sick and still miscarry but for today I'm happy with it! xx

 

[bluestars]

Well I'm happily dancing at your vomiting to haha ! Woow! Xxxx