Waiting for AF after M/C, anyone else? OCBM

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Aleeah- aw I'm so sorry didn't mean to make you cry!its just that I followed the link in your signature and read your story literally 10 mins before you posted your news,so I had to let you know I was thinking of you!I'm a big believer in positive thoughts and attitude,so hope that knowing people over the world are rooting for you will give you that boost you need.I bet it hasnt even sunk in yet!
I've rested up so much I have cabin fever,I need to get out of the house!I'm feeling much stronger and more mobile now.After the operation I was so upset and angry at the world that I went on strike from anything to do with ttc,so I'm not temping or using opk right now.we decided to wait until after af comes (and wait 3 months if necessary as gp says)and then just take a more relaxed approach....BUT I can already feel myself getting back into it,and pretty sure i'll be breaking out the thermometer soon and poas obsessing!lol x
 
Blue - Love the cake!

Ljs - You are very welcome. I'm so sorry for your loss.

LL - I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to worry you. I just think it should be checked, just in case.

Lindsay - I'm sorry you have a long day. I hope it ends with good cake and relaxation.

Aleeah - Not all pregnancies have symptoms. :hugs:
 
Because DF isn't home and i've just joined fertility friend i've been faffing about with their search charts function and recording all the data in excel (I am very bored) regarding different conditions and the outcomes, e.g. pregnant, miscarriage, ttc times and it is very interesting and encouraging! For all those who love data, read on. For all those who don't, feel free to skip!

It's all very encouraging, and basically patience seems to be key, the average amount of pregs is 33% overall and avg months ttc is 8! (in my niaevity i thought it would be about 3 months) And not only that but age doesn't really have a massive impact. until much later. After mc the amount of pregs shoots up to 51%! (so the saying about fertility seems to be true). Things like having a high FSH, considered an example of ageing reproduction doesn't really have as much of an impact as an old girl like myself would expect, it just takes longer than it would otherwise.

Even having only one ovary doesn't do too much to dent your chances, again, it just appears to take a month longer than average.

An interesting ditty for dtd, every 2 days is the optimum, takes less time to get pregnant and has high rates of pregnancy. Having no egg white cm does nothing to decrease your chances.

Another odd thing, those with unexplained infertility really don't have too much of a lower rate of preg (10% less than the average), but they do take 2 years to achieve it, except if they use acupuncture, which shortens their ttc and improves their chances.

Those with progesterone deficiencies do have a slightly higher chance of mc, but only by 3%. Those with PCOS and endometriosis again don't have much lower rates of success or higher rates of mc, they again just take a few months longer than average.

Anyway, it's all very interesting...mainly because to me, if you look at the stats objectively, the biggest issue would seem to be how long it takes rather than the chances of success. Chances always seems to be around the same give or take 10%. Oh, and using sperm friendly lubricant does seem to work. Anyway, should probably get on with doing dinner. Sorry for the stats rant, i do like a good spreadhseet.
 
Cryss, heh, not too old actually, just by comparison. I just turned 36. Seems to be the norm in some ways these days ... How old are you if you don't mind me asking?
 
Thanks for the lovely comments on the cake. I was AMAZING!!

Aleeah- i at this point in time have adapted a possitive mental attitude for EVERYONE on here including me! So as well as my OHs birthday i am also celebrating your :bfp: !!!

Linny thats very interesting Research im on my 8th month now ... Seems so long. Im 24 and use opks, temp, use preseed and mainly bd every 2days.

Ljs how old are you ? How old is your little one?

Xxx
 
Blue- that's great, and your age is great, as in... There's time if needed. X
 
Blue - so technically that means this month is your month!surely?!keep my fingers crossed for you!
I'm 27,but still get asked for ID when I try to buy wine in the supermarket lol,good genes.
My little boy is 2,he is my absolute world and has made the whole ectopic experience a lot easier to get through. My heart goes out to those of you who don't yet have your little one in your arms x
 
I don't have that fortune... I look older it's sad really haha!

Linny any Ljs where you girls from? (Sorry if this has been asked already!)

Linny your still young!

My step mother is 35 and is due her first anytime now.

I'm so glad you had your little man to help you through! They are wonderful at cheering up any situation little ones! 2 is a great age too! Xx
 
Linny - Under your advice I printed off some info about acupressure to help fertility, and I made dh try it on me today! I am not really all that convinced it will have any effect (especially because it's difficult to tell if you're on the right spots), but I am willing to try anything (free) at this point so we'll see how it goes!

That's interesting that FF says the average wait is 8 months. I've been reading statistics since thinking about TTC, and what I've read is about 59% conceive within 3 months, and 80% within six cycles (and 85% within a year). But that is for healthy women under 35. My guess would be that FF has a disproportionally large amount of data from women with fertility issues, as I'd imagine if you're having trouble conceiving or have known fertility problems you would be more likely to go on a site that would help track cycles to conceive sooner. Even so, it definitely can be normal to take 8 months and it is interesting that so many "real people" actually do take that long. Hopefully no one here will have to take longer than 8 months, *Blue included*!!!!

DH and I have *both* now had dreams this week that I'm pregnant with twins (and his dream actually specified that they would be July babies). Now, I'm not too thrilled at the idea of twins for the first go-round...just because it would be SUCH hard work...but I do hope it is a sign that this will be my BFP month (and of course I'd be thrilled with twins if that's what we were given)! There is nothing in the family to say we'd have twins so I don't think it's really a risk.

I took the afternoon off because I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown (ok, I've already had multiple nervous breakdowns this week). It was nice. Dh and I watched a show at lunch and then I took a nice long nap. I feel infinitely more relaxed! I just wish I didn't have to go back to work for 2 more days before the weekend. :P

Hope everyone's doing well.

Nina - How did your blood work go? :hugs:
 
Just have to butt in here.
It took us 8 months to conceive our first. We're perfectly healthy, don't smoke, been off BC for well over 2 years, used OPK, and nothing worked.
We're currently on our 4th cycle and it looks like it will take that long again. We'll be starting IUI in December if nothing happens before that.

I don't really look at statistics that much because it's all a load of crap (IMHO) Once you fall in that 1% nothing really matters. You're part of it, and knowing that you're "only in the 5%" doesn't make me feel any better- only those who aren't that 5%.

I didn't take the bloods in the end because my temps dipped in the morning and AF showed shortly afterwards.
 
Lit unfortunately this is my 8th month of TTC! :( never ever thought it would take us this long. Hopefully it will be our last and I get a bfp.

I'm the same with statistics! I try not look as I always seem to be on the wrong side of them.... 1:35000 ......

Feeling awfully awful today! (Not mentally really... ) but I'm feeling uncomfortable in the womb area... If that's the right word! Or I'm on a auger come down haha!

Another temp rise this morning ... Hoping o really was a couple days ago and not tomorrow as usual (cd17) I'd rather be a couple of days in my tww than starting again. Xxx
 
Hope you're doing okay, Nina.

Blue - If you didn't O a couple days ago, I hope that uncomfortable feeling you're having is O about to happen.
 
Ljs, hopefully you won't have to wait 3 months to try again, I agree, waiting sucks! BTW, your profile pic is beautiful! Is it a wedding pic?

Aleeah, thanks so much for the birthday wishes :) I had a very nice day - hubby made carrot cake with cream cheese icing (my fav... I think we're having it again on the weekend at my parents too, lol) and we had a nice relaxing evening. One of my clients (a 7 year old boy with an amazing memory) made me a birthday card too... it was very sweet, had me tearing up a little bit, I'm rather emotional these days, lol. I was trying to remember when it was that he asked me my birthday, but I think it must have been a month or 2 ago... he even remembered how old I was going to be. I wish I had a memory like that! Anyway, hope you're feeling well today! As they say, every pregnancy is different, so maybe you won't have as many symptoms with this one :)

Crys, thanks, yes, I did have a relaxing evening, and far too much cake! :) How are you doing? When is AF due? Any sign that your little slip up may lead to a surprise?

Linny, wow, interesting information!! It took us 8 months to conceive the first time, although we were kinda ntnp for a while. I also agree with LL who mentioned the stats may be slightly skewed as probably more people who feel they are taking a while to conceive would probably join FF, but it is interesting none the less. Also, regarding increased fertility after m/c - my doctor told me that I would be "very fertile" after m/c but I didn't believe it, I was sure we were in for a long haul again! But, as it turns out she may have been right, or we may have been lucky.

Blue, love the positivity!! I hope this is your lucky month too! Hopefully O was a couple days ago, or happening right now!

LL, I hope those dreams are a good sign! I'm glad you took the afternoon off, sometimes you need a break and to do something nice for yourself. Not long to the weekend now :hugs:

Nina, sorry that AF showed up :hugs: Hopefully you'll be pregnant before December so you don't have to think about IUI.
 
I feel like this is a bad week for everyone. Even on the other threads I follow people seem quite down.

I do not buy into the "being more fertile after an m/c" thing because we are already taking longer than we did with our first. I got pregnant on our second cycle trying last time. It is now our 3rd and I have a feeling we could be waiting a couple more cycles.

Nina - I am terribly sorry AF shows up. I know you are tired of this. I am too. It is not fun to keep going. At least you have a plan and can try IUI in December if you don't get pregnant before then. I have faith that you will not need the IUI at all because you will be pregnant with your rainbow baby by then! Let's hope we both get a July baby!
:hugs:

Lindsay - happy belated birthday! I am so sorry... I got confused because it was blue's hubby's birthday and totally forgot. I feel terrible! I am so glad you had a great day. You totally deserved it! You are an amazing person and such a support on here. That is sort of comforting to know that you took 8 months to conceive your first. It is nice to feel like it is 'normal' to take more than 2 months.

Blue - I know it is your 8th month trying and that must be so discouraging for you. :hugs: that is why I said I hope it doesn't take anyone *longer* than 8 months! You very much deserve your BFP this month! I do hope you have already ovulated or that at least you will be in the TWW tomorrow!
 
Lindsay109 said:
Crys, thanks, yes, I did have a relaxing evening, and far too much cake! :) How are you doing? When is AF due? Any sign that your little slip up may lead to a surprise?
Click to expand...

Carrot cake is my DH's favorite too. When I made him one from scratch one year, he didn't eat it very well. Turned out he didn't like the real version as well as the fake version of store bought or boxed cakes. So I don't bother anymore. Lol.

AF is most likely due some time between Saturday and Monday. I haven't really paid much attention to any signs. Just going with the flow. If I do notice something, like a twitch or something, I just mark it down to progesterone or gas. :haha:
 
Cryss - hehe, well, we're in the same bracket love, and i used to smoke years ago, I did stop in my mid twenties, I can only hope it didn't affect things too much - again, 40 isn't really a cut off as the fertility police would have us believe. My old babysitter just had a baby at 43 after a lifetime of smoking, drinking and being very overweight. I mean, it could be just luck of the draw but equally, we are living much better lives these days. At least, that's what i'm telling myself x


LJ - good to hear you've got a LO to help you through! x


Blue, i'm in glasgow, scotland. whereabouts are you?

LL - great stuff! I've had DF do it a few times, based on info in the book 'The infertility cure' by randine lewis (don't worry! I don't think i'm infertile, but it's good info for improving fertility). And so far I would say I do end up with a few twinges around the uterus afterwards. Whether good or bad, I don't know but i'm sticking with it.
Yeah, re: the stats, I thought about it last night and figured, it's talking about pregnancy rates of cycles. rather than of people, which is very different. They do say that a woman in her thirties has a 25% chance per cycle to get pregnant which would correspond better with FF's data. And yes I agree, there's probably a higher proportion of people on there with fertility issues which would skew stats upward. RE: the mc fertility connection, although it said 51% pregnancy rates - fact is, that's still only half of all cycles afterwards, so by no means a guarantee. Even so, no reason to think you'll be waiting for an age x Glad to hear you got a nice day off!

Nina - I know what you mean, no amount of saying it happens to X amount of people helps when it happens 100% to you. That said, I think what I found by looking through the info was that I thought it would look worse than it did. Even with severe hormonal issues, ageing, high FSH, time delays, miscarriages etc - the general impression was never bleak - does that make sense? sorry to hear AF started, mine's still trailing around after me, causing untold knicker issues.

Lindsay - absolutely (skewing), but I think the notion of getting pregnant in a couple of months for me has been kind of blown off now, and i'm thinking - relax...it might take a while. heh. The fertility after mc data was the highest possible percentage of pregnancys across all the stats i saw. Very glad that you're in the 51% ! x
 
Crys - glad you've been so relaxed waiting for AF to come. I do hope it comes sooner rather than later so you can get over this next cycle of not trying ASAP!

Linny - I honestly felt tingles all over my reproductive organ area for the entire evening after he did the acupressure, so I do think it must stimulate blood flow there at the very least. I just hope it only has positive effects. Let's hope it works on us this month! I am also guzzling whole dairy and taking calcium since apparently those who have whole dairy have higher conception rates than those who have reduced fat/ or no dairy!
 
LL - haha! I've been doing the same thing! I love whole milk....also, apparently those who eat ice cream are in the same boat - it's medicinal! x
 
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