waiting for ivf and struggling!

[mummy.wannabe]

Come on to say happy Christmas to everyone and to hear some good news.
I'm so sorry pinkie, not a nice thing to happen before Christmas.
How are you doing?
Does your family know your situation?

Did you manage to enjoy Christmas Day?

I can't wait to get started again, it's going slow now.
Been making hubby and I bit sad seeing my MIL fuss all the grandchildren and seeing my niece on my side have her 1st birthday on 22nd and her Christmas outfit.

Hot was everyone else's Christmas x

 

[2have4kids]

Was OK, we had my parents over for christmas and then some girlfriends over for drinks & snacks. My gf was making comments like why don't you adopt a Brazilian orphan? Like I want to hear that at Christmas, just to remind me I don't have kids and want them and just because I really really want to hear your self centered opinion on things. She's so in love with Brazilian everything, Brazil isn't the answer to everything. And when all the men there cheat on you, well, maybe there's some success because they don't understand what her sharp tongue is saying. This girl is single for a very good reason, love her but she has some stoopid comments sometimes.

It's going to be bittersweet Christmas & holidays until we get our BFP's. How about everyone else? I think we're going for a walk and a movie tonight.

 

[Melbram]

Mine wasnt too bad - it was the first year without my nan so a little difficult - was back in work today so doesnt feel like Christmas has been - roll on the New Year and hopefully a string of good luck for us all x

 

[Pinkie 33]

Hi Ladies
How are you all now the festivities are over?! I've lost track who is starting again this new year?

I'm feeling a bit flat. The soonest the clinic could book us in for a review appt is 28th Jan. The nurse said they would want 3 clear cycles before starting again (is that normal?) which takes us to end of March - April time.

It seems like ages away. We've gone back to trying the old fashioned way which is lots of fun after many weeks abstinence. I've also sent for info on adoption. Although we are a long way off this yet, I just want to understand the process. I'm not sure how many IVFs we can afford after this one so I just want to be prepared.

Also thinking about egg sharing to reduce the cost, has anyone else considered this?

Eugh, there is so much to think about (dwell on!!).

xx

 

[2have4kids]

Pinkie, if I had the ability to share eggs to reduce the cost I'd do it in a second. Unfortunately we've got a bit of a wank of a PM (Finger waging Harper-sooo embarrassing) and our health care is miles behind Britains. Have fun doing the natural thing & gl.

 

[Pinkie 33]

Thanks Sorry your set up is so different to ours. I had never thought about egg sharing until I started looking at the costs.

I'm trying to weigh up the pros and cons.... I'd love to help someone else at the same time as easing us financially thus opening up chances of more goes. I'm worried how I would feel if theirs was successful and ours wasnt (having reduced our chances of more embryos by sharing) and I'm worried I'll dwell on the children that could be about with half my DNA

I know its daft but its one of those things that the more you think about the more confused you become!

 

[2have4kids]

Thanks Sorry your set up is so different to ours. I had never thought about egg sharing until I started looking at the costs.

I'm trying to weigh up the pros and cons.... I'd love to help someone else at the same time as easing us financially thus opening up chances of more goes. I'm worried how I would feel if theirs was successful and ours wasnt (having reduced our chances of more embryos by sharing) and I'm worried I'll dwell on the children that could be about with half my DNA

I know its daft but its one of those things that the more you think about the more confused you become!

Way before I ever started ttc I've been told a gazillion times I look like so and so. I have scottish and german parents and chalk it up to a common gene pool. We're all sisters & brothers and nephews anyway. I know what you mean, this will intensify that feeling. I've never enjoyed being told that I look like someone else it's like saying hey there, you're not so unique afterall! Thanks buddy.

 

[mummy.wannabe]

I've looked at the egg share and read people's stories too.
1 lady said that if there was only a few eggs they would all go to the other lady waiting and you wouldn't get any but you would get extra off your next try.
How would you feel about the child finding out the details of you when there 18 and trying to find you?
I don't think I'd mind, the parents might not even tell them they are the result of someone else's eggs.
I personally think there are equal pros and cons to it.
Us British don't do enough egg share and that's why people go abroad but that's coz the egg donator gets paid.
I don't think I could egg share as I don't have a lot of eggs myself, only had 2 on collection, I couldn't go into it not knowing if if have my own eggs.
Once I've had my babies I would do it to donate all my eggs.

I go for further investigation scans once I start my period, in the next 2 weeks and then I won't get a period on feb so I start meds begining of March and I can't wait!!!! X

 

[2have4kids]

I've looked at the egg share and read people's stories too.
1 lady said that if there was only a few eggs they would all go to the other lady waiting and you wouldn't get any but you would get extra off your next try.
How would you feel about the child finding out the details of you when there 18 and trying to find you?
I don't think I'd mind, the parents might not even tell them they are the result of someone else's eggs.
I personally think there are equal pros and cons to it.
Us British don't do enough egg share and that's why people go abroad but that's coz the egg donator gets paid.
I don't think I could egg share as I don't have a lot of eggs myself, only had 2 on collection, I couldn't go into it not knowing if if have my own eggs.
Once I've had my babies I would do it to donate all my eggs.

I go for further investigation scans once I start my period, in the next 2 weeks and then I won't get a period on feb so I start meds begining of March and I can't wait!!!! X

Hmm, I don't think I'd want to have the information given out about who the eggs came from. But I guess if we take one day at a time, I might change my mind 18 years from now.

FX for you in March mummy!

 

[mummy.wannabe]

I'm not sure you can hold off ok your details.
I hope this is everyone's year x

 

[Melbram]

Happy New Year to you all lets hope 2013 is a good one for us.

Pinkie - 3 clear cycles is the norm to get your body back to normal/all drugs out of your system etc...I wanted to start again immediately after my fail but once I resigned myself to having a break I quite liked it and realised how consumed I had become by the IVF.

I have had a 4 month break so far and dont really want to start until Feb/March - no doubt I will be on the long protocol again.

I have just booked a break to the lake District for OH and I - just a short two night stay but just feel like we need a break away before the madness starts again + we havent had a holiday is 3/5 years !

Im not too sure about the egg sharing like mummywannabe I would have no problem donating once I had my children but for the IVF process each egg is so precious x I had 19 eggs, 13 mature enough for ICSI, 2 made it for transfer but they were rubbish quality so will be upping my protein intake on Round 2

 

[mummy.wannabe]

I was told 3 month wait normally for your body to recover but on the Nhs they make you wait 6 months so gives people the chance to have round 1.
We are lucky we are getting it paid for so had to come terms with the wait x

I'd love a holiday but just can't justify spending it on 1 when we have things to do in the house that I want find before we have children x

 

[Pinkie 33]

It looks like we'll all be back in the saddle together this spring then I'm glad you've found the break helpful Melbram. I think its important to be in the best place before attacking it all over again.

Thanks for the info, I'm glad to hear three cycles is normal. I'm really frustrated that the clinic cant see us for a review until the 28th.

I'm still not sure whether I mis-carried or AF arrived at xmas. I thought AF was held at bay whilst on progesterone? I just want to understand what happened and whats happening now with my body. Should the first day of the bleed be CD1, I have no idea? I have always been 28days regular so I have assumed it was and that I'm ovulating this week but I have no idea?!

We went to see our GP yesterday. He was very reassuring but is obviously not an infertility specialist. He did suggest researching IUI His reasoning being that my plumbing is textbook and the issue is DP therefore why not invest time/effort into gathering as much sperm as poss and getting it to the right place at the right time instead of putting me through the IVF rollercoaster. Its also much cheaper, but much less successful I think.

Also he suggested reasearching IVF abroad, has anyone else done this?

Sorry for the long waffly post! Probably time to stop burbling and go and clean the house

 

[mummy.wannabe]

CD1 is the day that you bleed heaviest. I spot for 10days before I start cd1.

I don't think af is held off with the progesterone, not heard that.
As I fell pregnant I had to wait awhile for my levels to go back to normal and my hormones were all over the place, I bleed for a week then off for a week Etc for 3 months.
If it was naturally af that occurred and you didn't fall pregnant I'm assuming your cycles will be spot on what they were, but if there messed up abit as I think most woman's do it they fall pregnant, you will take awhile to get back into the regular pattern.

There is nothing you can do if they won't see you before, so try not to stress about it coz that won't help your body at all.

My hubby would never do it abroad, we've had the conversation.
I've spoke to people that have done it in Cyprus.
You start your meds over here a week before you fly out and then stay 2 weeks normally. It wouldn't be best for me as it took me 3 weeks for my eggs to get to size because of my problems.
I haven't a clue what IUI is to be honest x

This is what we are here for. To try and support each other and if you have questions, someone people may be able to answer so don't think your waffling x

 

[Pinkie 33]

Thank you I know you are right about the stressing. When we started IVF I didnt really have that many questions, just sort of went with the flow and did exactly as I was told. Now its failed, I cant stop asking questions!

Did the folks who went to Cyprus have a scuccessful treatment? Our GP mentioned a couple of his patients who went to India, had the IVF and a nice long holiday. We run our own business so I'm not sure we could even consider it but I'm not sure how many attempts at £5-£6k a pop we can afford.

I've got my head round the wait and we are throwing ourselves into work so we are looking forward to getting some money behind us and starting again. You must be excited too, March isnt that far away xx

 

[mummy.wannabe]

Not sure about the successes of abroad ivf to be honest. I'm
Sure the chances are exactly the same as here.

The idea is that you have a relaxing holiday at the same time but I think it would stress md out as I like to have my home comforts around me and the stress of sorting out the injections and stuff before Hand.

I know £5k is expensive everything but we have to think positive and think that 1 other go is all we will need.
egg sharing might be good for you if you haven't got any problems as you should have a decent amount of eggs x

I was the same as you, on the 1st go I didn't know what to expect so went with what I was told and learnt along the way, I don't feel any different this time really but maybe because I know I'll be doing the same thing but my dose will be upped this time x

 

[Melbram]

HI

Hows the house comming along now mummywannabe?

Pinkie: we considered IUI but were told that IVF would have a higher success rate due to the problem being with his . However if the cost is going to be significantly lower it may be worth giving it a go

I have never looked into IVF abraod and like mummywannabe would find it quite stressful I much rather be at home

I think the progesterone or the meds in general to hold of AF well on the long protocol anyway. My AF arrived on test day and was a week or two later than it usually would have been I think x

 

[mummy.wannabe]

House is getting there now thanks. Still lots to do.
Had building work done and all the electrics now. So now to get most of the rooms plastered, need the hall stairs and landing down next I think.
You feeling more ready to start now? X

 

[Melbram]

Sounds good everything will be perfect for when baby arrives

Yes im thinking about it more and more now

There is a documentary on tomorrow at 9 on BBC4 - called Baby Makers: The Fertility Clinic. Its filmed at the Hewitt Centre Liverpool where I have treatment - always interesting to see other peoples experiences.

 

[mummy.wannabe]

Oh really, yeah hubby and I will defo watch that.
I've not seen it advertised but ill go through to make sure it's set to record.

Yes we will have the house mainly done how we want it before a baby arrives then we don't have to stress or live in mess.

Taking all my decs down today, it always makes your living room look so much bigger ha love it x