Hey hey,
The MC was awful - by the time my body realised everything had gone wrong, I was about 14 weeks and went into full on labour, which was of course hideously painful. I also bled so badly that I couldn't stand up and kept being sick, so had to go to A&E and ended up spending a couple of nights on a drip. Rubbish. Did they tell you too that it would just be like a heavy AF? Liars. I was passing clots of tissue the size of large matchboxes.
In other news, I feel pretty awful. Can't sleep much past 4 a.m. because that's when the nausea strikes, and it lasts pretty much up until my evening meal. Nothing seems to help much, though I've been wearing sea bands and they're ok. How are you feeling now? Have you actually been sick, because I can't seem to get that far, though I've started gagging a lot!
Also (worst news) MIL now knows. OH stupidly stashed a playmat we had bought (brand new in a charity shop, £5.99, couldn't resist) in a cupboard in a spare bedroom. I kept asking him to move it, but he kept saying she would never go in there. Of course she did, and of course she mentioned it, so I made OH tell her later on after we tried to cover it up and did a pathetic job. I figured she would start staring at my stomach looking for changes unless we told the truth. Apparently, she stood there with her mouth hanging open, and when he mentioned that we felt we had been forced to tell because of all the comments she had been making recently, she said those had been a 'joke' and that she'd had no idea, which was an obvious lie!! He then banned her from asking questions and she almost immediately asked if it was planned (as if it matters) and was promptly told to fuck off. Such a very rude question.
I stupidly explained about my MC being the reason we have been reluctant to say anything, and she has since been needling me for details on that. I tried to gloss over the parts I mentioned above, as I didn't want to discuss them with her, by saying not opting for a D&C was a mistake and that it had been traumatic, and she asked me WHY it had been a mistake/traumatic!!! Um, why do you think?!
She hasn't said congratulations or showed any sign of being pleased or happy for us. I don't really know what she thinks. She seems shocked that two people aged 26 and 27 could possibly conceive a child, but maybe I'm just being paranoid and reading too much into stuff. It might be nice if she seemed slightly happy though. Am I just being selfish there? OH is their only child.
Earlier, she asked OH how I was while I was sleeping and then said she had hoped I would be feeling better because she wanted me to help her with some paperwork (I'm a qualified proofreader). Needless to say, I haven't been down all evening. I feel more disgusting and more of a freak now than I already did with this shitty nausea and my body bloated out all over the place. I also feel embarrassed and ashamed, and I hope someone will be visibly happy for us in the future or I'm going to have to carry this feeling the whole nine months. Or just stay in seclusion and not see anybody.
Sorry for the long post. I feel so fed up and like I'm somehow not entitled to the congratulations and good wishes everyone else seems to receive when they're pregnant. Is there some 'proper' way to do it that stimulates pleasantry from others? Do you have to be married, or have been together for ten years, or what? What makes it ok for some people to create a life and not for others?
Hope you are all having a better day than I am anyway!