What do you do when ???

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by Sevsie, Nov 18, 2011.

  1. Sevsie

    Sevsie Active Member

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    What do you do when you want your sister with you along side your husband as a birthing partner but your husband is dead set against the idea ??? She was with us for our son and was an amazing help and support for me . He sais we don't need her and can do it on our own ....

    Advice please ???

    I feel really stuck as I want her there again but understand that he wants it to be just the 2 of us .....
     
  2. ifoundmysoul

    ifoundmysoul Pregnant

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    as much as he id the dad your the one giving birth and the decision does rest with you however putting your foot down an insisting may not go down well! cant you try talking to him and explaining this?
     
  3. BabyGirl21

    BabyGirl21 Well-Known Member

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    It is up to you to be honest - My OH doesn't really want my Mum to be there for me - but this is our first and I'd like her there - I understand where he's coming from - but I'm the one giving birth if I want her there it's up to me.
    Try talking to him, I'm sure he will come around and realise that you want the support of both of them just as much xx
     
  4. jeanniepresto

    jeanniepresto Well-Known Member

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    my man said the same thing but i made it clear to him im the one whos goin to have all the pain and who i want in the room should be ok with hm .... im sorry i dont think he is goin to be the one helpin as much as my sister so if he dont like it then he dont have to be there....... but he is fine with it now i guess we really havet talked abou it anymore... I think they should respect us and nt say awaord cause they have no clue what we have to go throu...
     
  5. Futuremommy1

    Futuremommy1 Mommy to a lil girl

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    Are you by any chance on the WTE April board? There's a lady on there longer story but same issue and even if the stories are different I think the labor is the mother's area and she's the one whose comfort comes first.

    Once the baby is out then DH and I will make decisions together on anything related to her. But it's my decision while I'm giving birth as to how i do it, who is around me, what pain meds I want, if I need to scream, moan or groan, etc.

    If you want her there I'd really discuss with your OH about why you want her and need her there. Good Luck
     
  6. YoshiPikachu

    YoshiPikachu Mama to Hannah and Joseph

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    I agree with what she said.
     
  7. erikab922

    erikab922 Well-Known Member

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    Hmm, that is a pickle. I mean, obviously, while you're still pregnant it's your rules, it's just how to get OH to come around to your way of thinking. Maybe let him know that having her there will mean that when one of them (your sis and your OH) needs a break, is hungry, wants to go to the loo etc that if they leave then you won't be left all on your own - that it's better to have each other there as a backup for YOUR benefit.
     
  8. NuKe

    NuKe mummy to 2 gorgeous girls

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    tell him to get over it. you're the one giving birth.
     
  9. Sevsie

    Sevsie Active Member

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    Thanks everyone . We've spoken about it tonight and we've both agreed we don't want it to cause a problem . He knows it's my decision, and I will have her there if that's what I want . He just wants me to know that he'd rather it just be the 2 of us . I explained that I want as much support as possible and I feel safe with my sister there ESP as she's had 3 kids and has been a midwifery assistant. . It's just tough for him I think that I need more support than just him . In a way I'd Like it to be just the 2 of us but at the moment I feel I need her there . Time will tell I guess , I have 20 weeks to decide all being well !!!!!
     
  10. YoshiPikachu

    YoshiPikachu Mama to Hannah and Joseph

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    That's good he understands.
     

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