Worried about a larger age gap!

[Kent1982]

Hi

We have been actively trying for about 7/8 months now
For baby No2. Our daughter was 3 in May. I knew we
Would end up with a larger age gap- just really enjoyed time just the 3 of us and have been in no rush.

But now it's taking so long (took 11 months and two miscarriages with my LO) I am starting to worry that we should have tried sooner. I know I can't change that but wish i was already pregnant....

A few of my friends have had another LO already which is making me broody even more.

Did the larger age gap work for you? My LO is always asking for a brother now! Lol

Xx

 

[Sqwidge]

We have a 6yr age gap and I love it! Maybe if I knew I was going to have another one at the time (didn't decide to have another until son was almost 5, then had to wait a while to try) I would have made it so the 2nd arrived not long after first started school. It's been really lovely having a relaxing day whilst Joshua is at school just Amelia and I rather than having to chase around after a toddler and look after a baby. Personally I couldn't have handled it and it would have all been too much for me. It means when he comes home from school I can spend time with him without being harassed if that makes sense?

 

[tinytummy]

Me too agree with larger age gap. DS is 3.5 now and we are NTNP. So even if I fell pregnant, it would be minimum 4 years gap between kids and I find it perfectly normal. You may not have any problem over bonding between two, in fact LO will be more than happy (if you involve him in this journey well before baby arrives) to welcome his sibling. Moreover, you will be more relaxed and can enjoy more with one-on-one time with each child. Really, its a very personal decision.

 

[steph.]

I'm worried too. I wanted 3 kids very close together. I got two but #3 is proving more difficult. Currently going through my second loss in a row. I worry that the first and last won't have much in common...but maybe they can have a nurturing role towards the youngest.

 

[Mango]

We have a 6yr age gap and I love it! Maybe if I knew I was going to have another one at the time (didn't decide to have another until son was almost 5, then had to wait a while to try) I would have made it so the 2nd arrived not long after first started school. It's been really lovely having a relaxing day whilst Joshua is at school just Amelia and I rather than having to chase around after a toddler and look after a baby. Personally I couldn't have handled it and it would have all been too much for me. It means when he comes home from school I can spend time with him without being harassed if that makes sense?

My DD is 6 years old, shortly turning 7. So I too will have a large age gap. Similar to SqWidge, I personally could not handle having two little ones close together as I also work full time. I'm hoping that whenever the next one comes along the gap affords me the opportunity to spend more time with the youngest during the day. I do however understand that they may not play together much but we're all family so they will love each other no matter what.

 

[Zeri]

I have a 5 yr old and a newborn. I had ttc when my DD was 16 mths as I had wanted a smaller age gap too- got pregnant but m/c at 9 wks. Tried again for 2 1/2 years.. all the while feeling frustrated at the growing age gap. Finally got preggo again in 2014 with DS. So far I like the age gap. DD is old enough to take care of herself so it's not too bad managing them both. She dotes on her brother and is fascinated by everything he does-she loves to interact with him, even though he can't play with her yet. I like that she was also old enough to see and appreciate the whole process of me being pregnant and then her DS being born. There's been no jealousy or sibling rivalry either, which is great!

 

[claireanddaz]

I would have liked a smaller age gap my daughter was 3 in June and we have also bee trying since last March and have so far had bad luck, miscarriage and ectopic! It happened first try with our daughter. The positive is she will be at school when we have another so more time to spend with a baby

 

[Sqwidge]

I have two brothers and a half sister. 3, 5 and 15 year age gap (sister eldest) and I get on better with my sister and elder brother...so a big age gap doesn't necessarily mean they won't get on xxx

 

[skypink.mommy]

I feel you! We would have also liked a smaller age gap! My 3 year old will be 4 soon and he constantly asks for a brother and a sister! He is a lonely kid and goes crazy when he is with other children because he doesn't have any at home it makes me so sad, but we have tried and failed twice in 2013 . Now with over a year of a break we are back at TTC . I would also like to adopt at some point . If this time around pregnancy doesn't work for us we will consider adoption of a child closer in age to our son.