Would-Be Due Date/Loss Anniversary

[krulci]

Pregnancy hormones have the best of me and I've been an emotional wreck, recently. So much so, I've quite literally exhausted DH with my random outbursts (he has to nap because I keep him up late crying!). That being said, I was hoping for some empathy from all of you... and some ideas.

Anyone commemorate their would-be due date or loss anniversary? Tomorrow would have been my due date for our sweet baby, Clementine. I feel like I should do something..? But I'm lost. I don't want to wallow, especially where I'm carrying another who needs attention, and DS's birthday is on Friday, so I'm crazy busy - but I think I'd feel worse if I didn't at least take out a moment or two to do something special. Still not sure if I'll include DH in it... Anyways, suggestions/thoughts welcome!

 

[Kasey84]

Congratulations on this pregnancy. Hope all is going well!

I'm sorry to hear about your previous loss. I think it's completely normal that your feeling very emotional. I lost my first baby on Christmas Eve 2012. I got another BFP in August 2013. My little boy is now 10 weeks old! The pregnancy with him was a very emotional time for me though, as I often worried about losing him and thought a lot about the baby I had already lost.

I think it's lovely that you want to commemorate the EDD for your angel baby and doing that issomething that I found to be helpful. On my angel baby's EDD (June 22/13) I visited a baby loss memorial site (something the local hospital built) and left some flowers. I bought one bouquet of flowers and split it, leaving half at the memorial and taking half home with me. That morning, I also wrote my baby a letter (which I keep in a special box). It was a great way to express my feelings. It felt good to acknowledge the loss and honor the baby. It allowed me to feel at peace in some way. This year on June 22, I did the same thing to commemorate what would have been the baby's first birthday. I know not everyone has access to a baby loss memorial site and before I was aware of ours, I had thought about planting a small tree or flower in my own garden in remembrance.

Whatever you decide to do I hope it helps.

Sending hugs and wishing you all the best in this pregnancy!

 

[Angelbaby_01]

Hi Krulci,

Yesterday was my would have been due date and I cried my eyes out. I am glad I am pregnant, but still loved that baby as well. I would have been a girl richer now. I didn't do something yesterday because I bought a charm bracelet for mother's day that I wear almost everyday.

 

[Gwen77]

Sorry for your loss

Today would have been the day my little one was born (Oct. 8th). I remember being SO HAPPY to have an October baby because I love Autumn and Halloween. I'm sad, but at the same time I think that everything happens for a reason. So yesterday, instead of wallowing in sadness I made my husband go out and buy one of my favorite wines (AF is visiting this week) and we enjoyed every sip of it!

...Probably not the best way to handle things, but it helped me relax a little and start thinking about our next round of TTC.

 

[flou]

I've had two losses and my first would have been due date is my birthday. I was determined to not feel upset so I celebrate my birthday and the would have been birthday of my first. On my second loss would have been due date I was about 7 weeks pg with my current baby (with whom I'm now 17 weeks pg). That felt odd, kind of bittersweet. If I hadn't had my second loss I would never have been carrying my hope to be rainbow. And even though I was sad, I felt it gave my loss a reason. Before I found out I was pg I made a charm bracelet with two charms, one butterfly and one teddy bear charm to represent my two angels. My bracelet accidentally broke so I carry it everyday in my purse until I get it fixed.