Your thoughts on nursery?

[pinktaffy]

well i aint putting my lo in nursary im a sahm so theres no need for her to go to one till shes 3.
i really dont see the need if ur not working and your happy 2 have lo with u then take no nottice of what people tell u to do xx.

 

[eddjanuary10]

Thank you for all your views girls I am happy to be sharing this special time with lo and will not worry that I'm not doing enough for his development by not sending him to a nursery until 3 or 4. If I return to work my Mum has said she would be happy to look after Ihsan, but for now I love being a SAHM and DH takes good care of us.

xxxxx

 

[leelee]

I also don't think you need to put him into nursery. It sounds like you do loads with him and it is more beneficial for him to be with you.

I am going back to work when LO is 1 for 3 days a week and he will be going to nursery. We were very fussy when we were choosing and found one that seems very homely. I will continue to go to groups with LO on my days off.

I am choosing to go back to work of my own accord as DH could support us financially, but for me, I want the best of both worlds - to continue my career and still be there for LO 4 days of the week.

When the new baby arrives I think I will look into a childminder.

 

[annawrigley]

Thanks unique I agree with your view and do feel happy with Ihsan just doing the activities we do together and feel thats enough for now whilst he is this young.

I haven't really come across anyone thats put their lo in nursery unless it was because they had to work so didn't realise it was something people do tbh.

xx

tbh hun i think it's BETTER for them to be home as you can give one on one,where as at a nursery they have to share the caregivers.

I also think that the early years are the time for strong bonds to be formed,and whilst nursery doesn't prevent this it does hinder it IMO

i think that when they are 3 it is good as it prepares them for school and by that age they are wanting to socialise and make friends etc

Remember some of us have no choice, and thats not very nice for us to read

 

[leelee]

Thanks unique I agree with your view and do feel happy with Ihsan just doing the activities we do together and feel thats enough for now whilst he is this young.

I haven't really come across anyone thats put their lo in nursery unless it was because they had to work so didn't realise it was something people do tbh.

xx

tbh hun i think it's BETTER for them to be home as you can give one on one,where as at a nursery they have to share the caregivers.

I also think that the early years are the time for strong bonds to be formed,and whilst nursery doesn't prevent this it does hinder it IMO

i think that when they are 3 it is good as it prepares them for school and by that age they are wanting to socialise and make friends etc

Remember some of us have no choice, and thats not very nice for us to read

The thing is some people on here don't seem to mind if they offend others. I do not agree that nursery hinders the bond between a mother and child. The bond I have with my LO is so strong and I have put so much time and love into him. I think it is laughable to suggest that this will be hindered by him going to nursery 3 days a week.

 

[indy and lara]

I am a SAHM too and Emma wont go to Nursery until she starts school nursery at 3. Hopefully I wont go back to work before then but if I do, my Dad will watch Emma. Nurseries do a great job but it is not my choice for Emma. But that is my choice. It is right for me but wouldn't necessarily be right for someone else.

I also should say that I am a teacher so I am pretty confident that I am able to offer her the actvities , etc that she needs to help her develop. We go to toddlers group/ Jo Jingles. meet with my pals and their LOs at Soft Play, etc so she has lots of opportunities for interaction with other children. If you are happy at home with your little one then I don't think you need to be too concerned about putting him to nursery.

 

[brownlieB]

Thanks unique I agree with your view and do feel happy with Ihsan just doing the activities we do together and feel thats enough for now whilst he is this young.

I haven't really come across anyone thats put their lo in nursery unless it was because they had to work so didn't realise it was something people do tbh.

xx

tbh hun i think it's BETTER for them to be home as you can give one on one,where as at a nursery they have to share the caregivers.

I also think that the early years are the time for strong bonds to be formed,and whilst nursery doesn't prevent this it does hinder it IMO

i think that when they are 3 it is good as it prepares them for school and by that age they are wanting to socialise and make friends etc

Remember some of us have no choice, and thats not very nice for us to read

The thing is some people on here don't seem to mind if they offend others. I do not agree that nursery hinders the bond between a mother and child. The bond I have with my LO is so strong and I have put so much time and love into him. I think it is laughable to suggest that this will be hindered by him going to nursery 3 days a week.

I got a bit hurt when I read that too so well said. My bond with LO is very strong and I think our days together when she's not at nursery and i'm off work will be extra special and not taken for granted.

On the flip side to OPs original post my friends LO is 1 and she said if she could she'd have him in a nursey for socialising reasons as he was at a childrens party the other day and wasn't interested in the other kids, as he doesn't interact with them at home.

Though I think you said you're LO does interact with other children, but just a thought as to why nursery/daycare could be an advantage

 

[leelee]

Thanks unique I agree with your view and do feel happy with Ihsan just doing the activities we do together and feel thats enough for now whilst he is this young.

I haven't really come across anyone thats put their lo in nursery unless it was because they had to work so didn't realise it was something people do tbh.

xx

tbh hun i think it's BETTER for them to be home as you can give one on one,where as at a nursery they have to share the caregivers.

I also think that the early years are the time for strong bonds to be formed,and whilst nursery doesn't prevent this it does hinder it IMO

i think that when they are 3 it is good as it prepares them for school and by that age they are wanting to socialise and make friends etc

Remember some of us have no choice, and thats not very nice for us to read

The thing is some people on here don't seem to mind if they offend others. I do not agree that nursery hinders the bond between a mother and child. The bond I have with my LO is so strong and I have put so much time and love into him. I think it is laughable to suggest that this will be hindered by him going to nursery 3 days a week.

I got a bit hurt when I read that too so well said. My bond with LO is very strong and I think our days together when she's not at nursery and i'm off work will be extra special and not taken for granted.

On the flip side to OPs original post my friends LO is 1 and she said if she could she'd have him in a nursey for socialising reasons as he was at a childrens party the other day and wasn't interested in the other kids, as he doesn't interact with them at home.

Though I think you said you're LO does interact with other children, but just a thought as to why nursery/daycare could be an advantage

Try not to let it get to you. I think it is a ridiculous statement and if it was the case then there would be a lot of children in the UK and beyond with 'hindered' bonds to their mothers. I don't think so!!!

 

[xUniquex]

Thanks unique I agree with your view and do feel happy with Ihsan just doing the activities we do together and feel thats enough for now whilst he is this young.

I haven't really come across anyone thats put their lo in nursery unless it was because they had to work so didn't realise it was something people do tbh.

xx

tbh hun i think it's BETTER for them to be home as you can give one on one,where as at a nursery they have to share the caregivers.

I also think that the early years are the time for strong bonds to be formed,and whilst nursery doesn't prevent this it does hinder it IMO

i think that when they are 3 it is good as it prepares them for school and by that age they are wanting to socialise and make friends etc

Remember some of us have no choice, and thats not very nice for us to read

The thing is some people on here don't seem to mind if they offend others. I do not agree that nursery hinders the bond between a mother and child. The bond I have with my LO is so strong and I have put so much time and love into him. I think it is laughable to suggest that this will be hindered by him going to nursery 3 days a week.

not my fault if my opinion is offensive to some.. it's my opinion and i did state it simply what i thought!

i cannot spend all day playing with words,trying to cater to others situations for fear of offending someone!

i answered OP's question with my own opinion.

I'm a 'call a spade, a spade' kinda girl!

 

[leelee]

Thanks unique I agree with your view and do feel happy with Ihsan just doing the activities we do together and feel thats enough for now whilst he is this young.

I haven't really come across anyone thats put their lo in nursery unless it was because they had to work so didn't realise it was something people do tbh.

xx

tbh hun i think it's BETTER for them to be home as you can give one on one,where as at a nursery they have to share the caregivers.

I also think that the early years are the time for strong bonds to be formed,and whilst nursery doesn't prevent this it does hinder it IMO

i think that when they are 3 it is good as it prepares them for school and by that age they are wanting to socialise and make friends etc

Remember some of us have no choice, and thats not very nice for us to read

The thing is some people on here don't seem to mind if they offend others. I do not agree that nursery hinders the bond between a mother and child. The bond I have with my LO is so strong and I have put so much time and love into him. I think it is laughable to suggest that this will be hindered by him going to nursery 3 days a week.

not my fault if my opinion is offensive to some.. it's my opinion and i did state it simply what i thought!

i cannot spend all day playing with words,trying to cater to others situations for fear of offending someone!

i answered OP's question with my own opinion.

I'm a 'call a spade, a spade' kinda girl!

And I was just responding to say that I completely disagree with the statement. Nobody knows what the bond is between another mother and child and it seemed to be a sweeping statement.

 

[annawrigley]

Thanks unique I agree with your view and do feel happy with Ihsan just doing the activities we do together and feel thats enough for now whilst he is this young.

I haven't really come across anyone thats put their lo in nursery unless it was because they had to work so didn't realise it was something people do tbh.

xx

tbh hun i think it's BETTER for them to be home as you can give one on one,where as at a nursery they have to share the caregivers.

I also think that the early years are the time for strong bonds to be formed,and whilst nursery doesn't prevent this it does hinder it IMO

i think that when they are 3 it is good as it prepares them for school and by that age they are wanting to socialise and make friends etc

Remember some of us have no choice, and thats not very nice for us to read

The thing is some people on here don't seem to mind if they offend others. I do not agree that nursery hinders the bond between a mother and child. The bond I have with my LO is so strong and I have put so much time and love into him. I think it is laughable to suggest that this will be hindered by him going to nursery 3 days a week.

not my fault if my opinion is offensive to some.. it's my opinion and i did state it simply what i thought!

i cannot spend all day playing with words,trying to cater to others situations for fear of offending someone!

i answered OP's question with my own opinion.

I'm a 'call a spade, a spade' kinda girl!

And I was just responding to say that I completely disagree with the statement. Nobody knows what the bond is between another mother and child and it seemed to be a sweeping statement.

Well... It is your fault since you chose to word it in an offensive way. Plenty of people have said they're choosing for their LOs not to go into nursery and fair enough, that would be my choice if I had one, but to say it hinders a mother and child's bond... Where exactly is your proof? Since your children arent in nursery themselves? Or is it just one of those things where you think your parenting choices are so superior to everyone elses you dont care who you trample down along the way?

 

[eddjanuary10]

ohhhh please don't argue I think the bond between a mother and child is very special and nothing can break it except neglect/broken trust etc. However, if lo went to nursery I would feel that I was missing out on special time that can't be given back and I would probably be jealous of the nursery nurses for having it and me not! plus, tbh i couldn't 100% trust anyone else yet, he can't tell me about his day or if he was upset etc. So I just couldn't put him in a nursery yet! I totally understand why some people do though and if I had to I would be very specific with my choice of nursery too. I can see other points of view we are all different with different circumstances and opinions.

My lo is also part of a big family and interacts with large family groups regularly so I think thats why he is quite sociable and likes to be around people/kids of all dif ages and why some of my relatives think oh he is ready for nursery. actually i think well with him being that way why does he need to then he is obviously stimulated and confident without going to nursery!

Anyway, thanks for all the response

 

[RJsMum]

Thanks unique I agree with your view and do feel happy with Ihsan just doing the activities we do together and feel thats enough for now whilst he is this young.

I haven't really come across anyone thats put their lo in nursery unless it was because they had to work so didn't realise it was something people do tbh.

xx

tbh hun i think it's BETTER for them to be home as you can give one on one,where as at a nursery they have to share the caregivers.

I also think that the early years are the time for strong bonds to be formed,and whilst nursery doesn't prevent this it does hinder it IMO

i think that when they are 3 it is good as it prepares them for school and by that age they are wanting to socialise and make friends etc

Remember some of us have no choice, and thats not very nice for us to read

The thing is some people on here don't seem to mind if they offend others. I do not agree that nursery hinders the bond between a mother and child. The bond I have with my LO is so strong and I have put so much time and love into him. I think it is laughable to suggest that this will be hindered by him going to nursery 3 days a week.

not my fault if my opinion is offensive to some.. it's my opinion and i did state it simply what i thought!

i cannot spend all day playing with words,trying to cater to others situations for fear of offending someone!

i answered OP's question with my own opinion.

I'm a 'call a spade, a spade' kinda girl!

I kind of have to agree that she did state it was her opinion...so that basically says you don't have to agree with it. Also, it's just that...an OPINION...I don't get why people are so offended/insulted by something that belongs to someone else. I do find a lot of people in this country are so worried about offending others that it goes a bit to the other extreme. I think there is a fine line and this certainly wasn't a post where I picked up on anyone blatently disregarding anyone's feelings as it's just how she feels about it...which she is fully within her rights to feel. Just MY opinion on that, anyway.

Also, for anyone saying that nursery is so fantastic for socialising...(not saying that it isn't)...but my niece, just a few mos older than DS, goes to nursery and ignores other people and babies most of the time whereas DS, who hasn't been to nursery or any playgroups yet, just home with me, Mommy (also a teacher) interacts socially with nearly every adult and child he sees. I think honestly that could be down to just how they're wired as babies. Nursery may influence it a bit, but the absence of it certainly hasn't made DS unsocialable.

 

[xUniquex]

Well... It is your fault since you chose to word it in an offensive way. Plenty of people have said they're choosing for their LOs not to go into nursery and fair enough, that would be my choice if I had one, but to say it hinders a mother and child's bond... Where exactly is your proof? Since your children arent in nursery themselves? Or is it just one of those things where you think your parenting choices are so superior to everyone elses you dont care who you trample down along the way?[/COLOR]

Did i say it was a FACT that it hinders a bond? NO!
I said it was MY OPINION !

FWIW i THINK (yes that's my opinion not a FACT!) that if i sent my children to nursery it would hinder our bond because their main caregiver is leaving them with someone else.

This means if one of my LO's hurts themselves i am not there to soothe/comfort them etc and i BELIEVE PERSONALLY that in the younger years being there for your child in these ways is very important!

I am in no way saying that people who place their children in childcare are neglecting/harming/hurting their children!! If you didn't see a point in my opinion you would not have got so uppity about it!

Gosh i think we need to start disclaimers!

 

[aob1013]

why do people get so pissy over one STRANGERS opinion! fgs!

 

[Lu28]

Thanks unique I agree with your view and do feel happy with Ihsan just doing the activities we do together and feel thats enough for now whilst he is this young.

I haven't really come across anyone thats put their lo in nursery unless it was because they had to work so didn't realise it was something people do tbh.

xx

tbh hun i think it's BETTER for them to be home as you can give one on one,where as at a nursery they have to share the caregivers.

I also think that the early years are the time for strong bonds to be formed,and whilst nursery doesn't prevent this it does hinder it IMO

i think that when they are 3 it is good as it prepares them for school and by that age they are wanting to socialise and make friends etc

Remember some of us have no choice, and thats not very nice for us to read

The thing is some people on here don't seem to mind if they offend others. I do not agree that nursery hinders the bond between a mother and child. The bond I have with my LO is so strong and I have put so much time and love into him. I think it is laughable to suggest that this will be hindered by him going to nursery 3 days a week.

not my fault if my opinion is offensive to some.. it's my opinion and i did state it simply what i thought!

i cannot spend all day playing with words,trying to cater to others situations for fear of offending someone!

i answered OP's question with my own opinion.

I'm a 'call a spade, a spade' kinda girl!

I kind of have to agree that she did state it was her opinion...so that basically says you don't have to agree with it. Also, it's just that...an OPINION...I don't get why people are so offended/insulted by something that belongs to someone else. I do find a lot of people in this country are so worried about offending others that it goes a bit to the other extreme. I think there is a fine line and this certainly wasn't a post where I picked up on anyone blatently disregarding anyone's feelings as it's just how she feels about it...which she is fully within her rights to feel. Just MY opinion on that, anyway.

It once again comes down to the way something is phrased. This was phrased in such a way as to indicate that there was some actual evidence or research done rather than one person's thoughts. If you're going to make a massively sweeping statement like that, the least you can do is explain what you mean and how it is you came to that conclusion. If it is a case that Uniquex feels she has a great bond with her kids and has seen some families where kids at nursery don't have as good a bond, firstly, you don't know what the bond is like if you're not in that family and secondly, it's like comparing apples and oranges, no child / parent relationship is the same, every family dynamic is different. To me, it's a ridiculous thing to say since there is absolutely nothing to back it up.

I work 4 days a week and myself and Aisling are incredibly close, I'd challenge anyone to say our bond is less than a SAHM and her kids.

 

[xUniquex]

Thanks unique I agree with your view and do feel happy with Ihsan just doing the activities we do together and feel thats enough for now whilst he is this young.

I haven't really come across anyone thats put their lo in nursery unless it was because they had to work so didn't realise it was something people do tbh.

xx

tbh hun i think it's BETTER for them to be home as you can give one on one,where as at a nursery they have to share the caregivers.

I also think that the early years are the time for strong bonds to be formed,and whilst nursery doesn't prevent this it does hinder it IMO

i think that when they are 3 it is good as it prepares them for school and by that age they are wanting to socialise and make friends etc

Remember some of us have no choice, and thats not very nice for us to read

The thing is some people on here don't seem to mind if they offend others. I do not agree that nursery hinders the bond between a mother and child. The bond I have with my LO is so strong and I have put so much time and love into him. I think it is laughable to suggest that this will be hindered by him going to nursery 3 days a week.

not my fault if my opinion is offensive to some.. it's my opinion and i did state it simply what i thought!

i cannot spend all day playing with words,trying to cater to others situations for fear of offending someone!

i answered OP's question with my own opinion.

I'm a 'call a spade, a spade' kinda girl!

I kind of have to agree that she did state it was her opinion...so that basically says you don't have to agree with it. Also, it's just that...an OPINION...I don't get why people are so offended/insulted by something that belongs to someone else. I do find a lot of people in this country are so worried about offending others that it goes a bit to the other extreme. I think there is a fine line and this certainly wasn't a post where I picked up on anyone blatently disregarding anyone's feelings as it's just how she feels about it...which she is fully within her rights to feel. Just MY opinion on that, anyway.

It once again comes down to the way something is phrased. This was phrased in such a way as to indicate that there was some actual evidence or research done rather than one person's thoughts. If you're going to make a massively sweeping statement like that, the least you can do is explain what you mean and how it is you came to that conclusion. If it is a case that Uniquex feels she has a great bond with her kids and has seen some families where kids at nursery don't have as good a bond, firstly, you don't know what the bond is like if you're not in that family and secondly, it's like comparing apples and oranges, no child / parent relationship is the same, every family dynamic is different. To me, it's a ridiculous thing to say since there is absolutely nothing to back it up.

I work 4 days a week and myself and Aisling are incredibly close, I'd challenge anyone to say our bond is less than a SAHM and her kids.

how on earth was it phrased like it wasn't my thoughts? read it again!

I also think that the early years are the time for strong bonds to be formed,and whilst nursery doesn't prevent this it does hinder it IMO

i THINK and IMO are both used .. not 'i heard that' or 'i read that' or even 'i know that'!

lets face it,whatever million and one ways i could've phrased it someone would have got a bee in their bonnet over it!

To those offended ...Suck it up buttercup.. it's a bloody forum FGS!

 

[Lu28]

Wow, you're lovely

My point is that you've made a massively sweeping statement that you have not bothered to explain, something which can never be tested, knowing it would be offending to a great deal of people. To be honest, it comes across as someone who is incredibly naive about the realities of life and a complexities of a parent / child relationship. It's like saying that those who ff don't have as close a bond as those who bf or that those who use prams don't bond as well as those who babywear - just ridiculous.

 

[amygwen]

It's really common here to put your child in a daycare (nursery) when they are just babies. My FOB takes care of Kenny while I work so I don't have to worry about putting him into care, but we thought it'd be for the best if we put him in ASAP. He already has anxiety when it comes to being around people he doesn't know and I really don't want him growing up like that. I was a VERY shy child and that's only because my mom waited so long to put me in care, so for that reason alone we've decided to put him in as soon as we find one that fits our needs and we can afford! It's up to you of course, it's your child but imo I think it's best if they get introduced to it as soon as possible!

 

[aob1013]

She's not saying it could or should be tested or that it's completely right, or has or will be proven it's HER opinion.. no more NO less!