2 week old with colic, distressed baby and mama :(

[disneydarling]

My baby girl is 16 days old, and even when we were still in hospital (we were in for 3 days with c-section) the midwives told us she seemed colicky. We have had problems getting her to burp since day 1.

The midwives in hospital recommended us to get infacol for her, which we did, and it helped get some more burps out of her, and we were using that from when she was about a week old. As she was coming up to 2 weeks, things have taken a turn for the worse since Thursday night, she has been in a lot of distress with the pain. When the health visitor came she told me to try colief drops in her bottles, which I went straight out to get, we have been using that since Saturday, but I don't think it's quite been long enough to work yet.

Our weekend has been absolutely horrible. She has been screaming in pain for 2 hours at a time, and we have tried everything we can to soothe her. Once it's over she is like a completely different baby, so happy and relaxed.

We had a doctors appointment this morning, for an unrelated matter, so I bought it up with the dr to see what she had to say. She basically told me off for giving her the infacol and colief, even though I'd only been following the midwife and health visitors instructions. She made me feel really awful, and basically said I was poisoning my baby said I should just let her cry and come back in 2-3 weeks if it gets worse. Is there anything else it could be but colic? We have googled colic a lot and pretty much everything that is typical of colic is what she is doing/experiencing.


I really do not know what to do now, she's crying all the time, and so am I. It's breaking my heart to hear her cry in such pain. Any advice or tips?!? I literally do not know what to do.

 

[maggie111]

I'm sorry I haven't much experience with colic but my advice is to get another doctor. He shouldn't be leaving her 2-3 weeks screaming in pain with no relief, and neither should he be so rude to you when you're doing the best you can.

There are lots of different holds and twists you can do to help relieve gas - I hope someone can help

 

[Noelle610]

It does sound like colic to me. My DD had it and it was awful! There's sometimes an underlying reason for the colic - like reflux or a milk intolerance - so I would ask that your doctor refer you to a specialist if possible.

I would not let her cry. If there's an underlying medical condition, the crying will only make it worse. If she is simply struggling with the transition from your womb to the big, scary world then letting her cry will just make her more upset. I would suggest looking at the "Happiest Baby on the Block" techniques:

https://www.happiestbaby.com/calm-colicky-infants/

Dr. Karp’s baby-calming technique consists of five interventions meant to be performed in the following order:

Swaddle the infant. The infant is tightly wrapped in a light blanket, with arms down and at the sides. This “gets the screaming baby’s attention” and simulates the snug hold of the uterus around the fetus. “This should be about as tight as the elastic waistband on a woman’s pants at the end of pregnancy,” Dr Karp said.

Hold the infant on his side or on his stomach during calming. “Try keeping them on the side, rolled a little bit toward the stomach,” he said. Putting a crying baby down on his back often stimulates the Moro’s reflex, which results in more crying, Dr. Karp said. However, it’s important to remind parents not to allow the infant to sleep on his stomach, which increases the risk of sudden infant death syndrome.

Have the parent make a very loud, rhythmic “shooshing” noise. In order for the baby to hear this, it has to be at least as loud as his crying, Dr. Karp said. “This might seem counterintuitive, because it sounds loud and rude,” but it’s similar to what fetuses hear inside the uterus: the constant loud whooshing of blood through the placenta, in addition to their mothers’ internal rumblings, breath sounds, and heartbeat.

Move the infant in a swinging motion. This is more like rapid jiggling, Dr. Karp said, with small, fast movements that slightly move the baby’s head. “If you stabilize the head too much, you’re not going to activate the vestibular reflex,” he said. Again, the movement must match the intensity of the baby’s crying: The harder the baby is crying, the faster and smaller the movement should be. One good way to do this is to hold the infant in the football or reverse breast-feeding hold, on his side slightly turned toward his stomach. Allow the head to rest on both open palms and lightly and quickly move the baby so that the head slightly wiggles in the parent’s palms. As the baby calms, the movement can become broader and slower, more like conventional swinging or rocking.

It’s important that parents understand that swinging or jiggling does not mean shaking, which can cause brain injury. “Tell parents never to try this technique when they’re angry,” Dr. Karp stressed. “This should be about the amount of movement you could imagine the baby feels when the pregnant mom is in exercise class.”

Give the infant something to suck. Give something for nonnutritive sucking: A pacifier or fingertip is good.

Also, do you have a sling or baby carrier? I'd try wearing your LO to see if that helps. They love to be close and the bonus is that you can get things done as well.

Ensure she doesn't get overtired, which will make the crying worse. Whatever you can do to get her to sleep - a carrier, a stroller, the swing, co-sleeping - just use it. She shouldn't be awake for more than 45 minutes or so at this age.

Make sure you take care of yourself. Getting outside really, really helps. Even if your LO is screaming, just do it. She'll probably like it to! I used to pop my DD in her stroller or carrier and take walks around the neighborhood. She would still scream, but it made me feel more sane! If you can have dad take her for even just 30 minutes so you can have a bath or a coffee on your own, it will help. Sleep when she sleeps, literally. Don't worry about anything like house-cleaning or laundry.

Take one day at a time or even one hour at a time if you are having a rough one. This does pass and these days are hard. I know this probably sounds silly right now, but this time will really solidify your bond with your baby. I hated mine as a newborn - sorry, it's true! - but after this phase was over I felt like we could get through anything together. We're here for support if you need anything.

 

[Gidz]

I was coming in to say exactly the same as Noelle. My DD had colic from week 5-6 and even though it was short-lived, it was the LONGEST.WEEK.OF.MY.LIFE! I did pretty much everything written above and it helped tremendously. She especially loved the colic massage and the football hold. I think the football hold put a little pressure on her tummy which helped with the gas pains.

 

[momofmisters]

A GIANT HUG TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Are you formula feeding or breast feeding? Your LO sounds exactly like my LO. We started off formula and breast feeding my LO is my 3rd baby and I sooo wanted to make breast feeding work with him. My first two were constantly in pain, never full, always nursing for hours and hours, and sooo uncomfortable. I stopped nursing and put them on only formula. They got a little better but still gasey and uncomfortable but after 4-5 mths were ok.
With my 3rd who is now 2mths I realized at 3wks old that he could be Lactose Intolerant. I now realize that all of my kids were at that age. He had most of the signs...green foamy poops (when he would go which wasn't often) gasy, crying, wiggling like he was in such pain, stuffy nose.

I switched LO to Enfamil Lactose Free formula and within a week he was a new baby. He burped sooo much easier, was not tense at all, stopped spitting up at every bottle, and with a couple weeks he started pooping yellow/greenish poops almost once a day.

 

[Noelle610]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1kQ-7gREcM

This is good too.

 

[Gidz]

That's the exact video I found! I remember thinking to myself, "this is bs!" But it works!

 

[Noelle610]

That's the exact video I found! I remember thinking to myself, "this is bs!" But it works!

I know, it DOES work!

 

[disneydarling]

Wow, thank you ladies for all those tips. Will be showing all of this stuff to my husband when he gets in from work!

We do have a carrier, but so far I've only used it once, but she did seem to really enjoy it and was really calm the entire time. The only problem is because of my c-section I'm still sore and can't keep it on for too long. My husband can wear if for longer but he's at work all day. I might get him to wear her for a while when he gets in tonight to see if it helps.

It's really helpful just to know other people have been through it, and I'm just trying to remember that it will end at some point! As I type this she's sleeping on me like a little angel and I can almost forget how bad it can be because she's being so sweet and peaceful. I hate that she's having to go through this!

 

[cococobain]

Hugs! I'm so pissed off that your doctor would even make you feel that way! God, like it isn't hard enough. I would honestly consider finding a new doctor, even if you were going about something the wrong way, it is not their job to make us feel like awful mothers.

As for the colic, everyone has already given you really solid advice, my LO had it bad from 3 weeks on and it lasted a month (we were also battling overtiredness so definitely "cheat" and do whatever it takes to help her fall asleep, you won't cause bad habits this early on). The massages, bicycle moves, bouncing on the bed with her in the upright burping position/walking up and down stairs/bouncing on an exercise ball, propping her in a sitting position with her head supported and gently leaning her forward/backwards sometimes got a burp out of her, these all seemed to help or at the very least soothe her somewhat. I realize the bouncing isn't an option for you though :/

As PP said there could be an underlying issue and it's always worth looking into it, otherwise I can attest that this WILL pass and I know how horrible it is when you're living it so really take care of yourself too. You're doing a wonderful job xx

 

[Indi84]

Big hugs, my friend's baby had colic and it was soooooooo hard for them.
First of all, IT WILL PASS! It will seems the longest weeks of your lives, but it'll pass, and be a distant memory.

Second, I see nothing wrong with infacol All me and my friends used it, I didn't have a colic baby but it helped him burp and seem more comfortable.

There are things like massage etc that can help, and my friend said hers calmed down in front of the washing machine (when on) and has been known to help, maybe google it? If you are FF there are colic formulas, or maybe just try another, I've had lots and lots of people have happier babies on Hipp organic, I used it straight off for that reason. (Again, people here might have diff opinions, but most said SMA didn't suit their babies at all)

Hope it all gets better for you xx

 

[cococobain]

^You mentioning the washing machine reminded me, I've heard that white noise can help calm a colicky baby! A hairdryer, fan or vacuum works well in place of an actual white noise machine (also youtube has hour long clips of white noise)

 

[weejenb]

Oh hun, big hugs to you! I've been there and it's awful. Gripe water worked really well for a while for us, but I think you're only supposed to give them that at over four weeks, but double check that. Ultimately we ended up switching him to comfort milk (if you're formula feeding), and that made a HUGE difference to us. My LO has just been diagnosed with a probable milk allergy, and I honestly wish I had pushed more sooner. I had my HV and GP telling me 'no' but I knew it wasn't right, took him to A+E and got a proper diagnosis. I second everyone who said push for a referral to a specialist if you don't get the help you need. I also think you should go see a different doctor, letting your baby cry in pain continuously for that long isn't right, that doctor has no idea what they're talking about!
You've mentioned that the carrier is understandably painful, have you considered a wrap instead? They tend to support the baby more and places less stress/pain on you carrying them.

 

[Sunshine12]

Id personally bin the infacol if its an extreme case. We got our HV to put us in touch with a dietician (having tried everything that previous advise had suggested) and we got probiotic powder (id had a section so they think she didnt have enough good bacteria) and colief and carobel and within 2 weeks she was like a different baby. Hope you ok and hanging in there. Its tough. xx

 

[Gc85]

My LO had colic and it was awful, started at about 18 days and disappeared as quickly as it came at about 12 weeks! This is what helped us:

Baby wearing and brisk walking
Gripe water (infacol and dentinox are s**t!)
Car rides (macdonalds drive thru coffee and muffin for mummy when she eventually fell asleep )
Dr browns bottles (if you ff)
Burping regularly during feeds
Baby massage
Plenty of fresh air (think it helped her sleep better)
Lying her across my knees on her tummy and gently patting/rubbing her back
Bicycle wheels with her legs


Defo get your LO checked out for cows milk protien allergy or lactose intolerance.

My LO was eventually diagnosed with lactose intolerance, she still had colic but once we got her on a lactose free formula she was much better. Good luck x