33 and looking for early/mid 30s buddy

[workingttc]

Hi, I am TTC #1, this is my 3rd month, CD 2. Looking for anyone in the same boat or similar. Thanks in advance!!

 

[anetha]

Hi! :wave:

Same here! Haha! TTC #1 - 3rd month - CD2
A little younger, 31...

just hanging around for now... trying to keep my mind off ttc, never thought I would be obsessed, and hate myself for it. Then again, I stopped drinking coffee and smoking (well, I'm doing my best), so I need something !!!

What are you up to?

 

[workingttc]

Hi anetha - that's crazy how similar (except the age of course, but still pretty close)! i never thought i'd be this obsessed either - it's ridiculous, actually. it's just so frustrating to feel like you're doing everything right and not getting any results, you know??! i'm going to try to be more relaxed this month - last month was a pretty stressful month, so i'm hoping that's part of the problem. also trying checking my temps (BBT) this month too...not sure how much that helps. have you tried that?

 

[anetha]

Hi anetha - that's crazy how similar (except the age of course, but still pretty close)! i never thought i'd be this obsessed either - it's ridiculous, actually. it's just so frustrating to feel like you're doing everything right and not getting any results, you know??! i'm going to try to be more relaxed this month - last month was a pretty stressful month, so i'm hoping that's part of the problem. also trying checking my temps (BBT) this month too...not sure how much that helps. have you tried that?

Heyyy! I just read on another of your posts how your hubby wanted it to happen "naturally", I am EXACTLY in the same boat. This is crazy!!!!
Yes, I have been temping, but for 2 cycles only. I'm obsessed, but I have learned SO much about my body. I know I ovulate know, and I know my cycles are very regular (I wasn't before I took the pill). It is really worth it.

What has been so stressful? The ttc only or more?
If you're only on cycle#3 you shouldn't be freaked out! You should only start worrying after 6 months of doing EVERYTHING right - ovulation date, BD before O, on the day of O. And then again, some say it can take up to a year. I can't bear the idea, but that's what I'm listening to!

 

[workingttc]

That's great that you are totally regular - my friends who've been successful tell me that's the key to success!!

I know you're right that it's too early to worry, it's just hard I feel like when your whole life, you're told if you work at something you can do it, but then this is like not like that at all--know what I mean? I think the temp-ing will help me this month because I'm concerned last month that I didn't ov at all (my cycle was only 25 days) and there seems to be know way to know for sure without temping. (Then again, I feel like I really don't know what I'm talking about, since all I know is what I read on line and a lot of that stuff is questionable at best )

So funny that your hubby is like mine. It's so cool how you can find people in exactly the same situations on-line like this - no idea what people did before the internet!?!

As far as stress, mainly just work stuff--I have a pretty demanding job. Gonna try to do yoga or something to chill me out this month.

Well here's hoping this is a good month for both of us! I think you especially have a good chance - you're regular, you've been temping...should be a positive for you in a few weeks!!

 

[anetha]

Thanks for being so positive! We have been ntnp since july though... and I know that there was a chance I could have conceived at least 3 times. So, I'm hoping that everything will be fine, that i'm just being impatient.

I know what you mean about not being in control for once. It's also freaking me out...
I'm not working right now (I'm a foreigner in the US) - sigh - so ttc obsession is worse. Yoga is great for stress and good sleep. I should go more often actually.

I can't wait for you to take your temps. Do you travel for work? That could upset your cycles. 25 days does not mean you didn't ovulate AT ALL. You really have to go on fertilityfriend.com, sign up and start charting, then we can analyze your chart. DO NOT start thinking negative BEFORE charting
This month you'll find out more about YOU! it's exciting!

 

[workingttc]

So encouraging! Thank you. Going to start temping tomorrow (ordered a thermometer online and waiting for it to arrive). Will be so helpful to have some insight - otherwise I feel like it's like this blackbox - no way to know what's going on!! Are you feeling good about this cycle? I feel like that's the one positive for me after getting a BFN--at least you get to start over and there's sort of a renewed sense of hope I will try fertility friend too.

 

[LittleSpud]

Hello girls! - I've been TTC for 3 years, its a hard time but we all have to stick with it! - We have to keep going, keep positive (helps to pee positive) ! - If I can help/support you in anyway then please just say!

Sending all the baby dust in the world to you girlys! I hope we all get somewhere soon and get those sticky beans!

oxo

 

[workingttc]

Thank you, Little Spud! Hopefully we newbies will bring lots of good luck and baby dust to you too!!

 

[anetha]

Hello girls! - I've been TTC for 3 years, its a hard time but we all have to stick with it! - We have to keep going, keep positive (helps to pee positive) ! - If I can help/support you in anyway then please just say!

Sending all the baby dust in the world to you girlys! I hope we all get somewhere soon and get those sticky beans!

oxo

HI littlespud! Happy you wanna join! Yes! This is the positive group! Hope we can keep it up together, join forces
Last month was hard for me because DH freaked out when I told him I was ovulating. Just a reminde: he's still ntnp (even if he doesn't want to admit it). We ended up not BDing at all before or on the day of ovulation. I'm afraid it will happen again, and have a bit of apprehension. I'm still mad at him too...
Sex is tricky when it comes to BDing. It's hard to chart and be sexy, if you get what I mean...

littlespud, you've been trying for three years, have you ever taken a break? Tell us more!

 

[anetha]

So encouraging! Thank you. Going to start temping tomorrow (ordered a thermometer online and waiting for it to arrive). Will be so helpful to have some insight - otherwise I feel like it's like this blackbox - no way to know what's going on!! Are you feeling good about this cycle? I feel like that's the one positive for me after getting a BFN--at least you get to start over and there's sort of a renewed sense of hope I will try fertility friend too.

Hi workingttc! Did you get your thermometer?

 

[workingttc]

hi girls!

anetha, getting thermometer after work tonight. very excited but also a little nervous it will freak out hubby (not sure what DH stands for--can you tell me? i don't know all the lingo yet ). as i think i mentioned, he tends to reject any type of "trying." so i can totally relate to the refusal to BD when told that you're ov--that would definitely be something my guy would do (if he knew - i haven't been keeping him informed about my ov dates yet, but that may be harder to do once he sees me taking my temp in the morning!). i read you have to do it first thing when you wake up, and that you shouldn't even get out of bed before you do it - is that what you've heard too?

Little Spud, I'd definitely like to hear your story. It's so impressive and inspiring that you're so positive - you're a great model for us!

 

[anetha]

DH = dear husband

workingttc, yes it will be hard to keep it from DH, but you can always say that it's a way of learning more about your body, your cycles - you feel like your cycles are irregular and you're worried. I don't know... that's what I said. If this doesn't sound like you, you just have to come up with something that leaves out the essential (that this will help pinpoint ovulation and enhance your chances of conception) - without lying entirely. But that makes me wonder: have you ever had a conversation about trying? Or does he also reject talking about it? Is he NTNP (not trying, not preventing)?

If you go on fertilityfriend.com, you will find absolutely everything you need to know about temping (would be too long for me to explain, and you have so much info on that site, including powerpoints!).

The only problem with takign your temperature in the morning is that the beep can wake your DH - depending what your schedules are. Since you're not supposed to get up or move before temping, the beep under the covers is still annoying. If you want to suppress the noise, you can take your temperature vaginally. I should have done that...

 

[workingttc]

ah, "dear husband" - got it. there is so much i don't know about all this!! my DH is on board with trying, and wants to have a kid. his younger bro and wife are having a baby in august (of course got PG right away), so i think that's motivating him. but he just doesn't want it to feel like "trying" i guess. i don't know what his deal is - i just know that if i talk about the "process" too much, he just kind of shuts down the conversation. frustrating - he really is a great guy tho!!

so your DH is ntnp (this is also new for me - "not trying not preventing")? it definitely sounds similar to what i'm dealing with. my DH seems to just want things to happen magically - even though i'm 33!! anyway, i will check on fertility friend for the instructions on temping. i'll probably just have to tell DH what i'm doing...sigh...hopefully he'll take it in stride

 

[anetha]

Same here!!!!
Or should it be ?
Tell DH, it's for the best!
My DH is also a great guy! Love him to threads. He's just freaked out. When I say my DH is ntnp, I'm really saying that he doesn't want to "try hard", he wants it to "happen", just like yours. Can't blame them, if I were a guy, I would prefer this too. But, you know what? I'm not a guy, I'm THE WOMAN, and I have decided to chart because it hasn't happened magically (we haven't been using protection since july) - BD (baby dancing = sex) over the weekends and the odd weekday has not worked, lol! Why? Because I always ovulate on a Wednesday or a Thursday (middle of the week is not the best BD time). If I O'd on a Sunday or a Monday, I would probably already be pregnant without really trying. Do you get the irony of this? Regularity is NOT a blessing for me
So this is what I came up with: BD in the morning. We'll see...

Have fun on feritlityfriend!

 

[EMC0528]

Hello lovely ladies!!! I found you!!!

 

[workingttc]

Hi EMC0528 - so glad you found us!

Anetha - definitely sounds like we are in exactly the same boat on the DH front. In my case, though, we were on vacation for the entire time I was pre-ov and ov last month, so we BD'd every day of that time period. That's kinda why I'm freaking out - I just feel like it should have happened. I know that even if you BD on the day you ov, it's still only like a 15-20% chance, but still...I'm trying to tell myself it's because we were in europe, so the time change/jet lag messed me up...But hard not to be a bit concerned. Anyway, hopefully you guys can make it work so that you BD on the right days - mornings are good!! If you didn't get to on the day you ov'd last month, I'd say there's a good chance for a BFP this month if you do!

 

[EMC0528]

Anetha- I actually heard BD in the morning is better because the sperm count is higher.

 

[anetha]

Yipee EMCO!!!!

Thanks workingttc, I also hope it will be a BFP this month! I'm worried too, but you shouldn't, absolutely should not be worried because it should have happened, after doing it all right. I understand tho, oh how i know how frustrating it is! First temp tomorrow then? Haha! You'll have to tell us how DH reacts to all of this. Stay cool!

Anyone else want to join us???
We're the positive group (you can read that two ways

 

[EMC0528]

Yipee EMCO!!!!

Thanks workingttc, I also hope it will be a BFP this month! I'm worried too, but you shouldn't, absolutely should not be worried because it should have happened, after doing it all right. I understand tho, oh how i know how frustrating it is! First temp tomorrow then? Haha! You'll have to tell us how DH reacts to all of this. Stay cool!

Anyone else want to join us???
We're the positive group (you can read that two ways

workingttc- Anetha is right, you should absolutely not be worried that you did everything just right and it didn't happen. I know how you feel because I've been feeling that way too over the last few months. Especially last month because I used OPK's for the first time, so I knew EXACTLY when the right time was. I guess it's a waiting game. I think we've waited long enough though, this is our month

It is SO cold in Calgary today. Wish I could be at home practicing my baby making with my hubby. hehe