35+ TTC 1st Graduates!!! Come on Over!

[pablo797]

Evening all!

I am exhausted, but I have to get this post out because tomorrow doesn't look to be any better work wise and besides I took notes.

I hope everyone had a good weekend, so many posts to read through today so here goes . . .

MA, glad doc appt went so well. Good to hear the length is good. Yeh 23 week miles stone. Sorry about the blues and the blood sugar. You are doing all you can for your baby girl, she will be healthy and strong!

Lava, welcome, welcome, welcome!!!

Steph, so good to hear the girl is gaining weight. In response to your question I live about an hour and half from Denver, and close to two hours from Castle Rock. Straight west and up. I am sorry you are dreading going back to work and leaving katelyn. It must be so hard, but try not to dwell on it and enjoy your time together. Thank goodness she's got DH.

Vivienne, Oh sweetie I am so sorry!!!! How much can one country stand? It's got to be so hard for you. If there is anything we can do to make your life easier, please don't hesitate to ask. You are in my thoughts.

CJ, I am such a Gleek too!!!! Been watching from the beginning. I love it!!! As for OVing, I guess time will tell. . . . .

Skye, good to hear from you! Glad the scan went so well. It's surreal isn't it?? Sorry to hear about the losses on the other thread. I need to lurk more over there. My heart goes out to my fellow TTC sisters.

Lucy, I can't believe Tilly is already 6 weeks! I am sorry you are still so sore. Yipes. Love the pictures of the girl, how sweet.

Codegirl, words of wisdom. I am glad you posted your information about two kids. Thanks for your thoughts!

Austin, Heck yes you should get help. I know it will be expensive, but how much is your sanity worth? DH's sanity? So happy you have such good friends and got such great gifts for your shower. It's awesome to have that kind of support.

Sunshine, LOL I keep feeling like the baby isn't real too!! It is very surreal to have her moving around and realize, I mean REALLY realize it's all going to happen, and pretty soon.

AFM, had a great weekend. A good friend of mine came into town with her four month old little girl. It was great to have someone to talk to and ask about a million questions. She also brought us lots of hand me downs. We've been talking about showers and I think I've had sprinkles. Folks keep giving us things out of the blue and we've been so fortunate for all the hand me downs I don't think we really need a shower. May have a Sip and See. After the baby is born have people over for a little get together to meet the baby. No gifts. I feel a little glutenous to ask for more. There are a few big items we still need, but other than that we're set. Speaking of, got the nursery 95% done on Sunday. DH painted the room, we put the crib together, got a new rug and put everything away. Instead of buying bedding I found a set of Pottery Barn adorable bedding at a garage sale and it's so sweet. Included everything, bumper, sheets, blanket, dust ruffle and it cost all of $25. Best of all it's in great shape and not too much pink lots of greens and yellows, the colors I wanted.

Finally thanks to all for weighing in on the "down there" issue. The advice about L and D being messy isn't something I even considered. I just felt bad for DH and the Doc. Never mind the whole stitches thing. Think I will have DH do the honors and then get "cleaned up" by a professional waxer just before.

Lastly, had a bit of a scare. Woke up Saturday AM with some spotting. I haven't spotted at all this pregnancy so I freaked a little especially after the contractions last week. Called the Doc and she said it was probably due to the BV and the fact that we had sex that morning. So . . . nothing to worry about, but I did the responsible thing and called the doc to error on the side of caution and I felt so much better about it.

Ok, sorry for the novel, hope everyone is well. I'm pooped and have to get up early to clean my house as my mother is stopping by tomorrow, some of you might remember her as the syrup Nazi.

Sleep well,Anna

 

[svetayasofiya]

syrup nazi!!!!!

Have a good day AnnA! Sounds like you are getting spoiled as you should be We wanna see pics of the nursery! We haven't even started ours yet but I have the vision in my head. Sorry about the spotting but your answer for it sounds bang on.

Have a good day everyone!! xo

 

[sunshine71]

Morning ladies!

Terri - you make me laugh! I'll probably wonder the same thing...

Anna - very happy you called the doctor. Seeing blood is ALWAYS scary, even if they tell you not to worry. And good luck with the syrup nazi! (Too funny...)

Great deal with the bedding! I haven't even STARTED looking at that kind of stuff yet. The crib's still in the box and I don't even have a mattress for it... Hopefully we'll have the flooring in & the crib put together in the next few weeks, and then I'll be able to look at stuff like bedding, curtains, etc... I'm hoping to have the major stuff done by 4th of July weekend, because after that our summer's pretty much booked up every weekend until some time in August. And I have a feeling that by then I'll be too big to want to tackle all that stuff.

This SO goes against my procrastinating nature...

 

[sunshine71]

Okay - I've got a question for the mommies... I'm in the process of looking at diaper pails. Any tips/advice/recommendations? Any NON-recommendations? Right now I'm looking at the Diaper Genie II Elite and the Munchkin Arm & Hammer, but if there are better ones out there I'm all ears.

 

[AustinGurrl]

Morning, all!
Sunshine - I have heard mixed reviews about the Diaper Genies... We have gotten 2 of them, so I would be interested to hear anyone's input, too... Girlfriend who gave me one of them had a baby 8 wks ago... she says its great. But I don't like the idea of having to buy the refills (not sure how much they cost) to use it... yes, it eliminates the "smell", but couldn't you just take out the trash to get the smell out of the house?

All that being said, I honestly have no idea how it works... lol...

 

[Junebug_CJ]

Wow holy posts!!!

Viv I can't imagine going through what your country/city are dealing with right now, and all of this during your pregnancy I hope that it's all uphill from here and that there will be no more aftershocks...

MA you're doing great my dear! There are so many things that can cause your sugars to go out of whack during pregnancy, you are a star and little Amelia is in GREAT hands!!!

Lucy, Tilly is sooooo cute! And yes, the sleep deprivation in the first few months is really really tough. People told me how tough it was but you really can't appreciate the true meaning of sleep exhaustion until your little one comes along. I swore for the first 5 months I was DONE! But it only gets better and soon those sleepless nights are memories. Ironically, now that she's completely self-weaned from nursing (as of this past weekend ) I miss our night time nursing cuddles It is all SOOOOO worth it!!!

Chris and Charmaine, I have the Diaper Genie. We use mostly cloth diapers so can't put those in there, but we have biodegradable inserts with GroVia covers and those go in the Diaper Genie. I'm so impressed that even though it takes us about 2 months to fill it, there is NO odour in the nursery with it! We've only emptied it about 5-6 times since she's been born.

Svet, yup, the heat can make the swelling really bad. It's called "pitting edema" when you press down on your skin and stays down. It's graded based on severity, from 1-3. During my last month, I had 3+ pitting edema thanks to the heat and the fact I worked full-time on my feet until I was 37 weeks. It was horrible. And it started overnight so I freaked out about PE and had an emergency Dr. apt. Everything turned out fine, but phew, it was too much!

LOL Terri, DH and I are still looking at each other in awe about 2-3 times a week saying "We have a KID!"

AFM, I don't know what to make of this! Maybe ladies who have used OPKs can help? I've had a strongly positive OPK Sunday night, last night AND this morning... What the heck? I read on FertilityFriend that ovulation itself can cause increase in LH, but classically, LH is only increased during the necessary pre-ovulation spike? Anyone else have this? I'm ecstatic because I now know I can detect ovulation so hopefully we'll be able to plan Petit Pois 2 in August using OPKs!

 

[sunshine71]

I think they all have refills, Austin. The Diaper Genie's were a little more expensive than the Arm & Hammer, but not really enough to make a difference.

My thing is the smell. Yes, you can just empty the garbage, but with the amount of diapers to be changed that would be a LOT of emptying. One of the big baby turn-offs to me has always been walking into someone's home and smelling "The Smell." You know that smell - the faint rotten odor that just seems to permeate the atmosphere EVERYWHERE in the house... I'll do just about anything to avoid The Smell. I swear, it even seeps into the furniture!

So anyhow - if there's something out there that will eliminate that, I must have it.

 

[codegirl]

We do mostly cloth but we do have disposables because of daycare. I always thought the slight odor in our house was the cloth diapers but then I bought the Diaper Genie. It was the disposables!! Even though we took anything poopy out of the house almost right away (use to sit on the kitchen counter next to the door and GROSS ME OUT until DH took it out when it was his turn) there was still a smell. Now nothing!!

 

[AustinGurrl]

Wow... thanks girls!!! Think we will be keeping them, then! I had just thought with 30 or so diapers a day, we might blow (no pun intended...lol) through the refills faster than it would be worth it!

Appreciate the input & thanks for getting the convo started, Sunshine!!! I am with you on the smell thing... I cannot stand it when there is an odor in the house. And with 2 big dogs and a cat, we work pretty hard to make sure that is not the case...

I had considered cloth diapers, but with all the other laundry... just don't think its a feasible option for us... wish I could! Oh well, we will try to eliminate our carbon footprint in other ways... Definitely won't be jetting off on vacations as much!!!

 

[AustinGurrl]

Wonder if they sell the refills on Amazon Mom?
Have yall checked into that?
Diapers, formula, etc., supposed to be quite less $$$..... and with free shipping... The home delivery of all the above makes that sound quite attractive....

Interested in hearing anyone's experience on that, too!

 

[Junebug_CJ]

Charmaine I've discovered the BEAUTY of online shopping and delivery straight to the house while home with a newborn! So worth it in my mind! Even online grocery shopping: a HUGE fan ;-)

 

[Junebug_CJ]

Charmaine, you'll be in single digits on your ticker in 8 days

 

[Mommy's Angel]

CJ, I got into a conversation about genetic testing and am wondering something. In my opinion, the testing that's done in OB and Perinatal centers aren't a guarantee and in most cases, without an amnio aren't even accurate. HOWEVER, in our bereavement class two years ago, there was a couple that had a child with a severe birth defect other than Downs. The baby suffered through the last hour.

Before the couple went back to ttc, they both went in for genetic testing and found they both carried a specific gene that caused their son's birth defect and found out it would likely happen with every pregnancy. They chose to stop ttc and adopted.

THIS is the case where I believe that testing by an actual geneticist is more accurate than the testing done in the first trimester with blood labs in combination with the scan and anything severe can usually be detected by scan.

Am I accurate in saying the best time to have genetic testing with higher accuracy is through a geneticist PRIOR to pregnancy with BOTH parents being tested?

Thought I'd ask you. In my opinion most of the genetic testing they've been trying to push on me and other women of risk (which means anyone over the age of 35) with both pregnancy has no concrete basis other than to persuade couples that children with downs should be either aborted because of their differences (we know many Downs patients are highly functional in society), pushed to terminate because of the cost to the gov't over the lifetime for medical care and lastly the eugenics issue.

Since not all their information is accurate during the testing and only gives you varied odds and with most severe medical conditions can be found by ultrasound anyways...It makes sense to me that a normal genetics test done prior to conception based on both the father AND the mothers genetic components would be more accurate and have more firm basis than that of the regular medical practices that in my opinion are pushing for the reasons above for someone elses benefit other than the patient/infant.


Just thought I'd get your take on it. I get into some heavy conversations. OBVIOUSLY they are my opinions and not based on facts, but I'm wondering if there is a difference between the genetic tests in medical practices and that of an actual geneticist!

 

[Junebug_CJ]

Didn't want to read and run MA I will answer your question thoroughly when I get a chance today!!!

 

[sunshine71]

Austin - yes, ma'am. The refills are on Amazon Mom.

 

[Mommy's Angel]

Not sure if I mentioned this, but excitedly waiting for Thirstie Duo Covers for my cloth nappies!

SO bummed that there aren't as many cutesie AIO or AI2's as they have in the UK. I may save up and buy some through the UK but have to make sure that with the cost of shipping it's worth it.

For right now though, I'm fine with what I have and will test the waters when Amelia gets here.

Had a rought night last night and didn't get to sleep until 5am this morning. Then I still get up every hour to pee. Needless to say I'm feeling nauseated from lack of sleep and am not a fun person to be around today. Will take a nap soon and pray through my attitude!

 

[AustinGurrl]

Rebekah - Sorry you had a rough night! Ugggghhh... getting up every hour is harder than just staying awake!

I know you question was to CJ, but as we did some gen testing, I can offer my experience...

When we first consulted our fertility specialist, we chose to run the full gamut on testing... as I have said in the past, being a lawyer and tech industry couple, DH and I are definitely, "just the facts, please" & the "more information the better" kind of folks...

Anyhoo... the genetic counselor (?-think that is her official title) had me undergo the testing first, only if any abnormal results showed up from my screen would it have been necessary for DH to do it, too... it was totally no big deal... just blood work.

CJ is def our go-to girl on subjects such as these... but fyi... we felt absolutely no pressure at all from drs, etc, based upon age or anything else to do the testing... which is likely why we opted to go all in... including the amnios... which in hindsight, I am SOOOO happy we did... with all the worry of multiples, I at least have some peace of mind on that front.

Again, just my experience, but for those who may be considering it... my experience has all been positive in the testing regard...

 

[svetayasofiya]

I think they all have refills, Austin. The Diaper Genie's were a little more expensive than the Arm & Hammer, but not really enough to make a difference.

My thing is the smell. Yes, you can just empty the garbage, but with the amount of diapers to be changed that would be a LOT of emptying. One of the big baby turn-offs to me has always been walking into someone's home and smelling "The Smell." You know that smell - the faint rotten odor that just seems to permeate the atmosphere EVERYWHERE in the house... I'll do just about anything to avoid The Smell. I swear, it even seeps into the furniture!

So anyhow - if there's something out there that will eliminate that, I must have it.

Wonder if they sell the refills on Amazon Mom?
Have yall checked into that?
Diapers, formula, etc., supposed to be quite less $$$..... and with free shipping... The home delivery of all the above makes that sound quite attractive....

Interested in hearing anyone's experience on that, too!

Good Thinking!

Austin - yes, ma'am. The refills are on Amazon Mom.

Awesome! There is your answer!! I love ONLINE shopping!!!

 

[Mommy's Angel]

Hey Viv hunny!

If you see this please post. My friend Rachel lives outside of Christchurch and I know the two quakes were pretty awful with the last rating at 6. I just want to know what's going on over there? Do you have running water? Do you have any needs. Again, I know I'm far away but want to know your safe. I do have some friends outside of Christchurch too.

In fact, her husband works in Christchurch when it happened again. They still aren't in the old office because the building next to theirs isn't holding up and the office itself is trashed.

Rachel (my friend over there) and I want to know if you have support and family over there with you?? She says she thinks her local birthing center is running in Rangiora if your still looking for a place. Has your home sustained damage dear??

Please let me know your safe!!

 

[Junebug_CJ]

CJ, I got into a conversation about genetic testing and am wondering something. In my opinion, the testing that's done in OB and Perinatal centers aren't a guarantee and in most cases, without an amnio aren't even accurate. HOWEVER, in our bereavement class two years ago, there was a couple that had a child with a severe birth defect other than Downs. The baby suffered through the last hour.

Before the couple went back to ttc, they both went in for genetic testing and found they both carried a specific gene that caused their son's birth defect and found out it would likely happen with every pregnancy. They chose to stop ttc and adopted.

THIS is the case where I believe that testing by an actual geneticist is more accurate than the testing done in the first trimester with blood labs in combination with the scan and anything severe can usually be detected by scan.

Am I accurate in saying the best time to have genetic testing with higher accuracy is through a geneticist PRIOR to pregnancy with BOTH parents being tested?

Thought I'd ask you. In my opinion most of the genetic testing they've been trying to push on me and other women of risk (which means anyone over the age of 35) with both pregnancy has no concrete basis other than to persuade couples that children with downs should be either aborted because of their differences (we know many Downs patients are highly functional in society), pushed to terminate because of the cost to the gov't over the lifetime for medical care and lastly the eugenics issue.

Since not all their information is accurate during the testing and only gives you varied odds and with most severe medical conditions can be found by ultrasound anyways...It makes sense to me that a normal genetics test done prior to conception based on both the father AND the mothers genetic components would be more accurate and have more firm basis than that of the regular medical practices that in my opinion are pushing for the reasons above for someone elses benefit other than the patient/infant.


Just thought I'd get your take on it. I get into some heavy conversations. OBVIOUSLY they are my opinions and not based on facts, but I'm wondering if there is a difference between the genetic tests in medical practices and that of an actual geneticist!

OK so many points to touch upon and clarify!

There are differences between "screening tests" and "diagnostic tests". Screening tests are the ones that readjust a woman's risk of having a child with a chromosomal abnormality. These are the blood tests in 1st and/or 2nd trimester plus nuchal translucency (either called first trimester screen if only 1st trimester bloods + nuchal done, or integrated prenatal screen (IPS) if 1st and 2nd tri bloods + nuchal done). This is the test most routinely offered especially in the context of a negative family history. For example, my age related risk at 37 of having a child with any chromosomal abnormality was 1/125 and specifically for Downs (trisomy 21) was 1/225. I did the IPS and this reduced my risk of having a Downs baby was decreased from 1/225 to 1/2500. However, my 8 week ultrasound did show an umbilical cord cyst, which gives a risk of trisomy 18 (Edward syndrome) of 1/10. So we went on to the "diagnostic test", which was CVS, in which you look directly at the baby's chromosomes. Because you're looking at placental cells with CVS, there is a very small risk (less than 5%) of accidentally looking at mom's cells (placenta is half mom, half baby). If you've got the right cells, the test is 100% reliable. Labs actually look to make sure (through genetic markers) that they are looking at baby's cells, and in the rare cases where they are not, an amnio is then offered, or a repeat CVS. Amnios are much more likely to have success from the start, over 99% chance you're looking at the right cells, but is only done starting at 18 weeks (as opposed to 10-12 weeks like CVS). We didn't want to wait until 18 weeks, so had the CVS.

IF an abnormality is detected on the anatomy ultrasound, then a woman will be offered an amnio regardless of what her blood tests (prenatal screen) showed, since even IF the risk is reduced from 1/225 to 1/2500 like it was for me, there is still that ONE case out of 2500 that that baby can have Down syndrome, and any other trisomies (since the prenatal screen is NOT good for trisomy 13, Patau syndrome, much worse than Down syndrome, and suboptimal as well for trisomy 18). PLUS other chromosomal abnormalities can arise, called unbalanced translocations, or deletions/duplications, which cause either a paucity or an excess of genes. Neither is good. We need a balanced genetic make-up to be healthy. One other very important point. The VAST majority of chromosomal abnormalities including trisomies ARISE IN THE AFFECTED FETUS and are NOT passed down from mom or dad. This represents over 95% of cases. Couples who have infertility or recurring miscarriages ARE offered a karyotype (where you look under the microscope at the chromosomes) to rule-out that they carry balanced translocations (people with these are healthy, but are at risk of early miscarriages or babies born with congenital defects) - but this remains rare in the general population.

Now moving on to "diagnostic testing". 2-3% of babies will have a problem identified at birth. Many of these are what we call multi-factorial and are not accounted for by a single gene: NO TESTING IS AVAILABLE. Common examples: isolated cleft lip and/or palate, most cases of isolated congenital heart defects, isolated umbilical hernias, etc... However if the baby has 2 or more congenital defects, he or she may have an underlying genetic syndrome. Most genetic syndromes are inherited in an autosomal recessive manner, with both mom and dad being carriers but carriers are healthy since they have one working copy of the gene (we have 2 copies of each gene). Affected children have no funcitoning copy. In recessive cases, the risk for every pregnancy is 25%. Unfortunately a couple contemplating a pregnancy can not be screened for recessive diseases, there are over 1000 of them and the cost would be astronomical. We all carry defective genes for 6-8 recessive diseases, but unless our partner happens to carry a defective gene for one of the same as us (odds are already low of this given there are over 1000 possible diseases one can be a carrier for), then we all remain at low risk of having a child with a recessive disease. It DOES happen, we see it all the time, but these diseases are individually very rare. If a baby is identified as having a recessive disease and the mutations are successfully identified, then prenatal diagnosis can be done for subsequent pregnancies, looking specifically for THAT ONE condition (plus for chromosomal abnormalities if the couple choses).

There is actually no condition that gives a risk of 100% for each subsequent pregnancy. At most, the risk is 50%, when we're talking about autosomal dominant conditions: in these group of conditions, having one defective copy is enough to cause disease. Many conditions inherited this way are new in the affected baby (an example being achondroplasia, the most common form of dwarfism). However in some cases, mom or dad are affected but this is usually obvious. I've seen a number of cases where mom or dad actually had a dominant disease but so mild that they were not aware of the diagnosis until they had a more severely affected child.

ALL of this to say: even if mom and dad have a karyotype done before conceiving a child and it is normal this does NOT mean anything. Chromosomal defects are for the vast majority new in the affected baby. Autosomal recessive diseases are NOT screened for since this is impossible to do (genes are much too small entities to be seen under the microscope and DNA tests are necessary to diagnose these conditions but one NEEDS to start with the affected person in the family) and many dominant mutations arise NEW in the baby as well. Prenatal screening tests are ONLY good for Down syndrome, which is only 1 of many possible trisomies. If there is a family history of a specific condition then yes, we can give more tailored information, but most people do NOT have a positive family history.

Wow, long and winded but I hope this clarifies a few things!!!