A home for EVERYONE!

[janelleybean]

I lost my favorite cousin to suicide. Everyone knew that it was inevitable. He battled his own personal demons all his life and attempted suicide many times, but each time he wasn't successful it was a reminder to us how much we loved him and wanted him in our lives. In 2009 he was successful and it forever changed my life. He was my best friend and I miss him every day. It was this story that forever changed my outlook for ANYONE not just those who are suicidal, but everyone. It's called "A jar of Stones"

A Jar of Stones
Excerpt from the book Dying to Be Free
If you filled a quart jar with stones, then held it straight out in front of you, you would find that with each passing moment the jar would seem heavier. The weight of the stones did not change, but your arm would hurt more and more until the pain spread to your shoulder, neck, and back, and became unbearable. Suppose you wish that the people around you to think you are strong enough to hold the jar forever, so when someone talks to you or offers help, you smile and refuse. You pretend everything is fine, even though by now you are in excruciating pain.
Why not allow your friends and family to support your arm or even remove some of those stones from the jar? Would you be ashamed that you could not bear the pain alone? Ashamed that you need help? Ashamed to ask for help?
This is how many suicidal people feel as they scream inwardly for help, but they will neither ask for it nor admit they are hurting. There are many people who would rush to take the jar from you if only they knew that you and your jar of stones were about to crash to the earth.

When I read this I was reminded that you should be kind to everyone only because you never know who is fighting a battle. So, I try to help everyone that I can and try to have a positive attitude and an optimistic outlook. For family and friends that are close to me and know of the story, if ever I need help or someone to talk to, I just tell them that my jar is full. When I see that others are down or having a hard time in their life and need support of others, I remind them that they do not need to carry a full jar, there are others there to help carry their stones and that we're all here for them.

 

[MnJ]

Krissy - Well sorry your night last night didn't go like you hoped but I'm glad you were there and woke up to help your hubby. He's so lucky to have you!!!

Grace - YAAAAY!!!! I totally had faith in your pregnancy. There was no part of my mind that felt it was a miscarriage. I don't know why. I'm SO glad it's a sticky bean and you got to see the heart beating. I just know you floated out of that doctor's office and couldn't rip the smile from your face. Also, your post was in NO way selfish. We WANTED to hear from you about you!! We don't feel harsh feelings against each other here Congrats on your blueberry!!

Janelle!!! You naughty, nasty little girl!! I love your horny self!!! Lmao I busted out laughing at your "don't tell misty cuz she'll yell at me". U so funny! Also, I HAVE had the doorbell wake me up but it hadn't rang. I'd do look out the window and everything, nobody there. Then I realize wait.. if it HAD rang the dogs would have been barking their fool heads off. Hmm...

Lisa - HI!! You're a mango!! Wow!! Wanna trade? I wanna be 19 weeks instead of 10. hee hee

BayBee - Where's your darn ticker, girl?!

Kanicky - HUGS!!! Sorry for whatever's happening with your family and I hope everything turns out ok! Do what you gotta do, we'll be here for you when you get back!! P.S. Fingers crossed you also get your BFP!!

 

[MnJ]

P.S. I'M A PRUNE!!!

 

[janelleybean]

I just saw that Misty!!! SO HAPPY FOR YOU!! YOU'RE ALMOST THERE!!!!!!

How are you feeling?!

 

[MnJ]

Almost there.. HA!! Not even!! I'm feeling.. worried because I'm feeling ok. I don't feel pregnant. I don't like it!!!!!!

How are you feeling?

 

[HisGrace]

Happy Prune Day, Misty!

 

[janelleybean]

I'm telling you man, I was the same way when I was pregnant with my son. my symptoms disappeared at 9 weeks and came back at 11. When is your doppler getting there?

I'm feeling alright. Had a nausea spell at dinner, but it has been worse. I keep getting these weird sharp pains in my boobs. It's more annoying than painful. My boobs are growing growing gone! I'm starting to think this baby implanted in my boobs rather than my uterus! Dan doesn't seem to mine though. :wink: I just got super tired and it's only 7:40.. I think I might have to go to bed early.

 

[MnJ]

Before my boobs stopped hurting I was getting the shooting pains too. It would shoot towards my nips. My doppler is being shipped postal service and since they have like every other day as a holiday, they had today off! Therefore it can't even ship til tomorrow!! I haven't received a shipped notification yet. Jake decided today he thinks I shouldn't have ordered it. I'm worried all the time and he's concerned it will just make me worry even more if I can't find a heartbeat. How long do you have to wait til your next appt btw?

 

[BayBeeEm]

Ahhhh, ok I must confess. I don't know how to get a ticker!

Army - so sorry to hear that your corpus luteum is leaking ... what does your doctor suggest as a fix? Or are you just live with the pain?

Krissy - I am glad to hear things are going well in your neck of the woods. Warms my heart.

MnJ - I just like you. I have the occassional stomach disturbance but I don't feel, feel pregnant. Yes, the boobs are a little sore, well the nipples but I feel like it should be more than what I've had so far. Sigh, maybe we are the 1 in 4 that don't get the full blow. Not fair! LOL

 

[armymama2012]

Nicole, I went through that as well. The not feeling well and not being able to eat much. I hate that feeling. It only lasted a few days for me, hope it's the same for you. I hope you see a heartbeat at your next scan. When is it next week? I had backaches as well, tell your doctor at your next scan, mine told me it's probably just hormones or could be where the baby is implanted if you have tipped uterus. Also, the app you speak of, can anyone DL it? My MIL has an ipad, but I do not.. She likes to be involved. Do you think she would enjoy it? Would it give her enough info? Or would she need a bunch of my info in order for it to be more affective?

Nicky- I'm thinking of you as well. You're such an amazing person and I hope that you get your BFP with in the next couple days. I'm hoping for you. =]

Krissy- Don't let your self have a heavy jar, when you've got all these lovely ladies to help you carry it. You know, I should really post that story just so that everyone knows what it's about.

Misty- Where the hell are you woman?!?!

Appointment is Thursday afternoon. I will mention my back pain. I think anyone can download it on IPad. If you tell her your due date she will at least get to see the baby's development as the weeks pass. Other than that it is more about helping the mom to be stay on track and organized. There are others though that cost like $3 and might have more stuff for grandparents.

 

[armymama2012]

Ahhhh, ok I must confess. I don't know how to get a ticker!

Army - so sorry to hear that your corpus luteum is leaking ... what does your doctor suggest as a fix? Or are you just live with the pain?

Krissy - I am glad to hear things are going well in your neck of the woods. Warms my heart.

MnJ - I just like you. I have the occassional stomach disturbance but I don't feel, feel pregnant. Yes, the boobs are a little sore, well the nipples but I feel like it should be more than what I've had so far. Sigh, maybe we are the 1 in 4 that don't get the full blow. Not fair! LOL

Nothing to do for it. Just no heavy lifting or vigorous BDing lol.

 

[libbyam2003]

oh dear... I've been off for a few days and so much to read... I hope everyone is doing ok! I am a blueberry today and don't feel pregnant. First appt this afternoon!

My daughter is frustrating me. In the tantrum phase. But not old enough to understand me very well so can't really punish her effectively. Sigh. Or maybe I could and I am just no good at discipline. I was so down about it last night. Feeling like I'm screwing up. DH wanted to put her in her room or playroom or playpen when she's screaming. But that just doesn't sit right to me. I want something that HELPS her learn. Not just what's easiest on us. Problem is she's having the tantrums when I'm BUSY, like cooking dinner etc. So methods I normally use like distraction or holding her aren't options. I guess I'll just continue to try and tune her out as needed. Just a lot harder now that my emotions are on overdrive! I am way more impatient/irritable these days.

 

[MnJ]

Hey girls, crazy worry wart prego lady here. I called Dr's office today to talk to them about having lost my symptoms. The nurse said she would talk with doc and call me back. She asked if any cramping or spotting which there's not.

Libby - my advice would be to ignore her and let her scream it out. If there's nothing wrong with or or she's not in need of anything then it's prbly just to get her way. Maybe if she sees that method doesn't work she'll give it up. I know easier said than done tho!! Good luck!

 

[Krissy485]

Nicole thats right no rough sex...hehehehe cant wait for your next u/s!

Janelle how was the rest of your night? thanks for sharing that..no matter how frustrating and upseting my life is there is one thing i always try to remember.....

There will always be some one worst off then me and some one better off than me that is the way the world works. I try to be thankful for what i do have and try not to dwell on the what coulda woulda beens because that does nothing for person.

Misty i am getting excited for your up coming u/s and i am postive you are fine! honestly with my boys i didnt have much symptom wise. my boobs were sore off and on but nothing consitant and no real ms. i was tired from like week 6-8 or 9 but that was it. just feel blessed you have an easy pregnancy ok?

afm....ugh i love him i love him i love him (i keep reminding myself grrr...)....ok so went to bed everything was fine wake up this morning and he was a complete ass and didnt even kiss me good bye? WTF he didnt want to go to work blah blah blah why dont i get a job blah blah blah...i told him just get up and go to work. he finally got ready and left. i tell you what ladies if he even DARES to think not to go to work one day because he is upset about our situation that HE put us in i will tell him to go live with his mom bc that would show me he is just plan out selfish and i will NOT put up with that bull shit i got too much to deal with to worry about my grown ass husband, i told him from the day our son was born that my kids will always come first before him hands down i love him but i will always love my kids more, granted it is a different love than what i have for him but in the end it is all the same if i have to choose to put up with his bull shit or make my kids happier...well you get the picture.

OK RANT IS OVER!! phew i feel better now....sorry about that ladies!

 

[HisGrace]

Libby - Happy blueberry day! Sorry I don't have any advice for your daughter but I'm sure someone on here will. Good luck at your appointment today.

 

[libbyam2003]

Hey girls, crazy worry wart prego lady here. I called Dr's office today to talk to them about having lost my symptoms. The nurse said she would talk with doc and call me back. She asked if any cramping or spotting which there's not.

Libby - my advice would be to ignore her and let her scream it out. If there's nothing wrong with or or she's not in need of anything then it's prbly just to get her way. Maybe if she sees that method doesn't work she'll give it up. I know easier said than done tho!! Good luck!

Thanks. I am feeling bad for letting he cry, but that's what I've done mostly. Lately, though, I'd started trying things like bringing a step stool up to the counter so she can see... or giving her a snack at her high chair or crayons... but all of that means dinner takes way longer to make bc tending to her constantly too. I will try to be more vigilant about not soothing her while I cook so she stops thinking it'll work. Was easier back when I could drink a glass of wine while I cooked!!!

I have had worries about no symptoms.. I posted in my journal about that. I know last pregnancy I was so tired and nauseous in first tri. But circumstances are different for me this time, more going on, less time to dwell on how I'm feeling, etc. So I think I 'gave into' my symptoms more last time?? Of course they also say every pregnancy is different. Not quite buying into that yet. Hoping to see a healthy baby at my first appt today... I think that'll help!! I had cramping and back aches and such earlier on, but nothing now. Other that yeah getting irritated way easily. Short fuze!

 

[HisGrace]

Get it out, Krissy!!!

 

[Krissy485]

oh dear... I've been off for a few days and so much to read... I hope everyone is doing ok! I am a blueberry today and don't feel pregnant. First appt this afternoon!

My daughter is frustrating me. In the tantrum phase. But not old enough to understand me very well so can't really punish her effectively. Sigh. Or maybe I could and I am just no good at discipline. I was so down about it last night. Feeling like I'm screwing up. DH wanted to put her in her room or playroom or playpen when she's screaming. But that just doesn't sit right to me. I want something that HELPS her learn. Not just what's easiest on us. Problem is she's having the tantrums when I'm BUSY, like cooking dinner etc. So methods I normally use like distraction or holding her aren't options. I guess I'll just continue to try and tune her out as needed. Just a lot harder now that my emotions are on overdrive! I am way more impatient/irritable these days.

First of all congrats blueberry and your first appt today

Now your daughter...ok i will give my advice and if you dont like it or it dont work for you no hard feelings. so i have 3 kids and believe me i have been where you are almost every day lol...now i hate to say it but your husband is not wrong...god i hate saying that lol....ok so if she is doing that and redirection to toys and what not does not work then i agree put her in her playpen for a time out. she is old enough to understand dont underestimate her because she knows what she doing. a few minutes in the play pen and go get her out and say now you need to play and let mommy get her stuff done. if she keeps screaming put her back in. she will get it but it will take time...

this is just the begining lol

 

[libbyam2003]

oh man krissy! Husbands can be a pain! I have empathy on that front!!! Sometimes they have to be reminded to act like grown men and that we're not their mothers!

 

[Krissy485]

Hey girls, crazy worry wart prego lady here. I called Dr's office today to talk to them about having lost my symptoms. The nurse said she would talk with doc and call me back. She asked if any cramping or spotting which there's not.

Libby - my advice would be to ignore her and let her scream it out. If there's nothing wrong with or or she's not in need of anything then it's prbly just to get her way. Maybe if she sees that method doesn't work she'll give it up. I know easier said than done tho!! Good luck!

Forgot to congrats you on being a PRUDE ooo sorry i mean PRUNE lol.....had to do it!!!

oh sweety you are fine!!! no cramping no spotting you are golden!!! even with my blighted ovum in the begining of the year i had syptoms all they way up till i started to spot at 11 weeks and miscarried 4 days later. so

i am glad you called though bc that is what dr are for and if it makes you feel better you call call call call girl!