anixety panic attacks and depression surpport group

[PepsiChic]

btw carolyn, your girls are gorgeous in your avatar!

 

[needausername]

Pepsichic, I LOVE my job normally but some stuff happened to me at work and it is a major contributer to the way I am now. Put it this way....I would be medication free and probably done with counselling months ago if it wasn't for this. Instead I am on Effexor XL 150mg (I refuse to go any higher) and will probably be in counselling for years now. I don't feel safe there anymore but can't say that because I could be moved out of the area I am in and I really don't like the other options. My hours would change and I would be at increased risk for bullying because of everything that is going on.

I went for a 5 mile walk on the beach today. It was lovely.

 

[PepsiChic]

Pepsichic, I LOVE my job normally but some stuff happened to me at work and it is a major contributer to the way I am now. Put it this way....I would be medication free and probably done with counselling months ago if it wasn't for this. Instead I am on Effexor XL 150mg (I refuse to go any higher) and will probably be in counselling for years now. I don't feel safe there anymore but can't say that because I could be moved out of the area I am in and I really don't like the other options. My hours would change and I would be at increased risk for bullying because of everything that is going on.

I went for a 5 mile walk on the beach today. It was lovely.

I know you love your job, but you should NOT be returning to ANY work place that you dont feel safe in, let alone a work place that has beent he cause of your problems.

when i lived in england, i worked for Tesco for a while, i was a shelf stocker at night, i liked my job, i liked my manager and the other ladies i worked with. then my manager got promoted, a promotion he deserved greatly. our new manager was horrible. but for some reason it was me he went after, he harrased me and bullied me from the moment i walked into the store till i left. everyone saw it, everyone knew what was going on and not one person stood up to him. i tried and got given a written warning from...him!

it got so bad that i had a mental breakdown one night and just sat ont he floor shaking and crying and strugglign to breath that i was taken home by one of the other staff members. i was off work for 3 months, i was put back on medication, and back into therapy. eventually Tesco said i had to make a choice either i come back or i leave. so i went back, but i dropped a lot of hours, i went from full time to just 12 hours a week (3 x 4hour shifts), i filed a complaint with the store about my manager. but no sooner was i back and he was straight back to his ways.

i couldnt cope and started selfharming, i refused to eat, i couldnt sleep and i did cut myself a few times. my medication increased and i was off work for another 3 months. Again i had to choose go back or leave. I filed yet ANOTHER complaint with the store and showed them a letter from my therapist and my medication. eventually they agreed i could work 1 night a week for 4 hours on a night he didnt work. a Sunday.

fair enough sundays were ok with me, it was time and a half pay. so 4 hours for the price of 6, i get to see all my friends and not that manager. 3 weeks into this and guess who decides he wants to be a sunday night manage suddenly? and guess what...the store allowed it!

so he started working sunday nights, and the same things started all over again. I couldnt take it anymore and walked out during a shift. Tesco did NOTHING to help me. infact they gave me a warning for leaving during a shift. I filed a complaint with headoffice. the manager got a "warning". and still to this day works there as night manager. a year or so later, i got contacted annomynously from another girl, who worked for him at a different store before he was transfered to my store. she went through the exact same thing with him. she said she even went to a meeting with headoffice about it and all they did was transfer him to my store), so it goes to show, some work places dont care about the little people - easily replacable i guess.

my point here is, whatever the problem you have with your work place, its unlikely to ever change or go away. if you dotn feel safe or happy their no matter how much you love the job, you have to leave for your own sake. or you will just get progessivly worse.

is it possible you could find another similar job?

 

[sequeena]

PepsiChic you went through something similar to me except I worked in morrisons I was bullied by my counters manager until I couldn't take it anymore and quit. Nobody did anything, all the staff hated her but even when I spoke up no-one else did

 

[needausername]

Basically I am stuck where I am. It is a long complicated story and I'm afraid of giving away too much on the public part of the forum. I have the backing of someone very high up in the trade union and they told me the best option is to stay where I am. That and the person has put in a counter complaint about me so I wouldn't even be able to get another job in another country as a nurse because of it!

I'm hoping to get some news over the next week on what is going to happen next but I can place my money on things getting a lot worse before it gets better.

 

[MoonLove]

Hi everyone!! I just found this thread thanks to a link Pepsichic put in another topic

I've suffered with anxiety issues since later 2006, its totally changed my life. I feel so much better and so much happier now than ever before, but its always there you know? It just affects me in different ways.

Nice to meet you all xx

 

[eblondie]

Welcome Carolyn! It's spooky because I was going to write that my anxiety hasn't been good and because of it I've been picking my skin!!! It's something that I've been doing off and on for a long time. I have never thought of it as self harm either... and I don't like it Most of the time I don't even realise I've done it until it's too late. Some of my fingers are so red and sore because of it Feeling really sad right now.

 

[PepsiChic]

big hugs eblondie!

PepsiChic you went through something similar to me except I worked in morrisons I was bullied by my counters manager until I couldn't take it anymore and quit. Nobody did anything, all the staff hated her but even when I spoke up no-one else did

its horrible to go through and im sorry that you did, im glad you quit and got away from it though!

Basically I am stuck where I am. It is a long complicated story and I'm afraid of giving away too much on the public part of the forum. I have the backing of someone very high up in the trade union and they told me the best option is to stay where I am. That and the person has put in a counter complaint about me so I wouldn't even be able to get another job in another country as a nurse because of it!

I'm hoping to get some news over the next week on what is going to happen next but I can place my money on things getting a lot worse before it gets better.

needa - im sorry your going through such a tough time at work, i understand if you cant talk about it here. not worth you getting yourself in trouble posting it on the internet, especially if you still work there. Im glad you have the union on yourside. I hope you can get the complaint against you disregarded, if im right that person has done that just to spite you and cause more trouble. shame on them.

keep us updated with what you can about the situation lots of big hugs your way!

Hi everyone!! I just found this thread thanks to a link Pepsichic put in another topic

I've suffered with anxiety issues since later 2006, its totally changed my life. I feel so much better and so much happier now than ever before, but its always there you know? It just affects me in different ways.

Nice to meet you all xx

hi gem! welcome to the group
im glad your doing better with your anxiety, i do believe it neevr truely leaves, just like depression, and every other mental disorder, its patterned into your brain and you can get better but it's always lurking, as long as you know the key to controlling it though it wont be able to effect you too bad, unless you let your guard down!

 

[PepsiChic]

im having one of those days where, nothing but bad thoughts seem to fill my head. barry was napping like normal, and for whatever reason i got it in my head that he had died, i ran crying and screaming into the bedroom and of course he was fine except now awake and scared looking. my husband was worried about me for the rest of the day because i kept randomly crying. i also wouldnt put LO down.

then while giving LO his bedtime bottle, i suddenly had the thought of what if i hadnt of wanted him? what if i had refused to hold him or feed him and had run away at the hospital? and it went on different senerios and i completely freaked out and put LO down in his bassinet and was chewing icecubes for a while, he of course started crying because we were only halfway through his feed, so then i felt worse and went back and gave him the other half, but was physically sick after i put him to bed.

i dont know what spurred these nasty dark thoughts, but they made me sick to the stomach, i cant even think about having dinner tonight.

 

[needausername]

 

[eblondie]

Sending you big hugs Pepsi chic. I have these thoughts sometimes too. It's horrible isn't it It;s easy to say that you need to think positive thoughts but harder to do.
I had bad dreams last night and so today hasn't been too good... resulting in me removing more skin I've got to stop this!

Hoping everyone has had a better day x

 

[Annunakian]

Well today has been horrible. I have been having a really hard time not freaking out over everything and now I just had to work my way through another attack because my insulin doesn't seem to be working and my numbers are way too high! Not to mention I'm nervous about using the new washer and dryer that my apartment installed. *sigh*

 

[odd_socks]

glad ive found this topic, i suffer from anxiety attacks OCD and occasional panic attacks, i really thought i was alone, and now it seems not to all

 

[Raggydoll]

All and welcome Gem.

Needausername I hope you get the good news you need this week.

It's frightening how often bullying at work goes on. It's even more frigtening how many companies choose to ignore it.

I left a job in 2003 due to depression. Whilst I was still at work there was a girl who made my life a misery. Before I had started she had bought my sisters old house, for some reason she wasn't happy but she took it out on me. I was already depressed but I hadn't been to see anyone about it.

One day I was sat in work, I could hear this girl making bitchy comments to another girl. I sat at my desk trying to ignore it when suddenly I just felt everything rushing in on me. I got up and walked to the loo and just sat crying my eyes out. I don't know how long I was sat there but eventually my supervisor came and sent me home.
My doctor signed me off. On the positive side this is when I started getting treated for depression.
Whilst I was off this girl started a rumour I was off due to anorexia. (One of my good friends worked in a different dept heard it and let me know) I finally decided to make a complaint to my supervisor. She basically told me it was too late to make a complaint about the previous bullying and being called anorexic wasn't an insult.
If I'd been in a better state of mind I would of taken it further. Funnily enough I knew something about this girl she didn't want people to know but I'd have never of stooped to her level.


Jeeez that ended up quite long. Thanks if you're still with me.

I'm trying to put into words how I've been the last week. I had such a great few days with Kate's birthday but after I went back to work I just felt so sad. I can feel that tension in my chest and it scares me.

I love my job but I've lost my drive. I can't concentrate and I've lost my confidence.
I feel sad looking back at last year. I should of been enjoying the early days with Kate but I spent them completely wrapped up in fear and anxiety.

 

[hotpinkangel]

Hi girls, can I join? I'm Emma, I'm 27 and I'm 38 weeks pregnant. I suffer from a horrible health anxiety and OCD, it's an absolute nightmare and it takes over my life at times. Just guess it's nice to see I'm not mad or crazy or alone, because I feel it sometimes xx

 

[Pink1981]

Hi all,

Can i join you all??

I *think* i suffer from anxiety. I was meant to start CBT last August/September time but i never went. I have real trouble leaving the house some days and the thought of sitting one to one with someone and talking about things is just a nightmare. I have days where i feel like i can but the chances of having an appointment on that day are non existant iykwim...

I had a bad day saturday, it started of really well. Me and DH went to town in the morning with the kids and everything went really well. We were meant to go out in the evening for dhs friends birthday so i had a little nap because i'm worse usually if im tired. I didn't sleep very well and when i woke up i felt like i just couldnt go. I cancelled my mum who was meant to be babysitting and DH was getting ready to go out still. I get really quiet when i'm suffering and can't really talk because i feel like such a failure.

Anyways he came and told me how he felt i was taking it out on him. Something just clicked in me and i we had a massive row. I told him how i couldnt believe he hadn't even offered to stay at home with me. It really felt to me like he was choosing his friends over me. I think if the offer was there i would have felt fine about him going. He told me how unfair i was and cancelled anyway. We ended up having a nice evening after lots of crying on my part and lots of trying to understand on his. I just feel so guilty that we didnt go, i dont know where it comes from and just how disabilitating it can be.

Does this sound like anxiety?

Somedays i get in such a state that i dont even feel like i can get up off the sofa. I end up feeling so bad because ive done the least possible with the kids. Just enough to get by. And things like washing up etc just dont get done. Is this normal?

I'm so glad theres people here i can talk to

 

[PepsiChic]

Well today has been horrible. I have been having a really hard time not freaking out over everything and now I just had to work my way through another attack because my insulin doesn't seem to be working and my numbers are way too high! Not to mention I'm nervous about using the new washer and dryer that my apartment installed. *sigh*

try to remain calm and remind yourself its just a washer and dryer and even should they blow up or flood the house, its not the end of the world and its unlike anything bad is going to happen using them. its justa chore and chores need to be done and once its done you can relax and watch some tv.

you should go see a doctor as soon as you can about your insulin, its not very safe to be using it if it isnt working effectively.

glad ive found this topic, i suffer from anxiety attacks OCD and occasional panic attacks, i really thought i was alone, and now it seems not to all

your not alone glad your here with us

Hi girls, can I join? I'm Emma, I'm 27 and I'm 38 weeks pregnant. I suffer from a horrible health anxiety and OCD, it's an absolute nightmare and it takes over my life at times. Just guess it's nice to see I'm not mad or crazy or alone, because I feel it sometimes xx

hi hotpink, OCD is so controlling, it really does eat away at parts of your life because it makes every little task a huge one. Im terrible with OCD atm so i know exactly how you feel. And healthy anxiety really can be bad, do you take anything to help with it? how is your pregnancy going?

and no your not mad, crazy or alone. these things are real health problems, real disorders and millions of people suffer from them.

Hi all,

Can i join you all??

I *think* i suffer from anxiety. I was meant to start CBT last August/September time but i never went. I have real trouble leaving the house some days and the thought of sitting one to one with someone and talking about things is just a nightmare. I have days where i feel like i can but the chances of having an appointment on that day are non existant iykwim...

......

Does this sound like anxiety?

Somedays i get in such a state that i dont even feel like i can get up off the sofa. I end up feeling so bad because ive done the least possible with the kids. Just enough to get by. And things like washing up etc just dont get done. Is this normal?

I'm so glad theres people here i can talk to

pink, yes it is anxiety that your suffering from.

CBT is great therapy for many people, for a few people it doesn work. i was one of those few. but like i said a lot of people do really really well with CBT and its highly recommended, so if you can go, do, because its a stepping stone that may help you overcome many issues.

one thing i would suggest is calling them and telling them that your too anxious to leave the house for your appointment and is there anyway they could come to you for the first few appointments. i think you would benefit well from that. and there is no harm in asking. i didnt see if you were int he UK or USA, but in the UK, Rescue Remedy can be found in supermarkets and that is a good natural calming solution.

im so sorry you had such a bad day on saturday, i have seperation anxiety and sometimes i make life hell for my OH when i refuse to let him leave for work and im literally clinging on to him beggin him not to leave me. it hurts him so much as he needs to work and he cant keep taking days off. and i hate myself for it. oter days are better but its few and far between.

take allt he time you need and keep us updated on how things are

 

[PepsiChic]

i had a good day yesterday although that could be because i ahvent let DH out of my sight so seperation anxiety hasnt kicked in. we went out for a meal last night with the LO, had a great night, ate at my workplace which is a steakhouse, the staff were thrilled to see me and me to see them. they loved seeing Lo again, and he loved the attention.

everyone was amazed at how well hes eating (BLW) and i was pleased! we came home played video games together, had a cuddle and i went to bed and he came to bed a couple of hours later.

feeling nervous today, LO has his 6 month shots,and while i know he'll be fine its me hat wont be. im major needle phobic. i have massive panic attacks that leave me unable to breath and i normally end up collapsing. so far i havent beenw ith LO for his shots, im there for the check up then i go to the car. and thats what i'll do this time but even KNOWING there are needles in the building makes it very difficult!

 

[sequeena]

Hi girls, I've been to see a consultant and substance midwife today. Both have agreed I need anti depressants so I've been put back onto sertraline but now it's a 100mg dose. I can go up to 250mg before it starts to get dangerous for baby.

When I have my triple test I need extra blood taken to check my liver. I overdosed back in October and a lot of the tablets I took were paracetamol which can mess your liver up. I had tests whilst in hospital which indicated it was ok at the time but they want to keep an eye on me.

It's a weight off my shoulders, especially since I only have my OH to support me

 

[Pink1981]

Hi all,

Can i join you all??

I *think* i suffer from anxiety. I was meant to start CBT last August/September time but i never went. I have real trouble leaving the house some days and the thought of sitting one to one with someone and talking about things is just a nightmare. I have days where i feel like i can but the chances of having an appointment on that day are non existant iykwim...

......

Does this sound like anxiety?

Somedays i get in such a state that i dont even feel like i can get up off the sofa. I end up feeling so bad because ive done the least possible with the kids. Just enough to get by. And things like washing up etc just dont get done. Is this normal?

I'm so glad theres people here i can talk to

pink, yes it is anxiety that your suffering from.

CBT is great therapy for many people, for a few people it doesn work. i was one of those few. but like i said a lot of people do really really well with CBT and its highly recommended, so if you can go, do, because its a stepping stone that may help you overcome many issues.

one thing i would suggest is calling them and telling them that your too anxious to leave the house for your appointment and is there anyway they could come to you for the first few appointments. i think you would benefit well from that. and there is no harm in asking. i didnt see if you were int he UK or USA, but in the UK, Rescue Remedy can be found in supermarkets and that is a good natural calming solution.

im so sorry you had such a bad day on saturday, i have seperation anxiety and sometimes i make life hell for my OH when i refuse to let him leave for work and im literally clinging on to him beggin him not to leave me. it hurts him so much as he needs to work and he cant keep taking days off. and i hate myself for it. oter days are better but its few and far between.

take allt he time you need and keep us updated on how things are [/QUOTE]


Thank you so much for taking the time to reply x