~ Anorexia, Bulimia & Eating Disorder Support Thread ~

[Love Bunny]

Helllooww ladies hope your all doing okaii =)

NOT HAPPY! I ordered a skirt from ebay the other day and I was deffoo being generous with the size and when it got here, IT STILL DIDN'T FIT ! PAH! I think I'll keep it though... mainly cause I don't think I can bear getting the next size up! but I guess i'll use it as one of those "motivational" clothing pieces that I can work towards fitting in properly once babys here.!

x

 

[tinybutterfly]

aaargh, that must be such a mood killer!!!
definatly something to keep around for after you had the baby


well, i finally got pregnant... i worked sooo hard to keep my weight up to get pregnant,
then i get ill, lose 7 lbs, am actually a bit underweight and then get pregnant,
it's NOT logical!!! it's a bit of a mindfuck too i must say, i'm actually quite pleased i'm at
a lower weight again AND pregnant...
of course, the only reason i am at that lower weight is bc little one is using up all the calories to build a comfy home...
ugh, it's hard to explain, i know i shouldn't be happy about it but i can't help but think
"oh yay, this means my end weight can be lower than initially thought"

 

[Love Bunny]

I know exactly how you feel! and congrats on finally making it though =D no ones here to judge hun so don't be ashamed of how you feel, like its been said - ED's are illnesses and are extremly difficult to control. I know alot of women would just laugh or be angry and make out we're selfish - but that just goes to show that they don't understand we can't all be perfect but i guess the least you can do is try haha xX

 

[Pixxie]

Hi! Im not pregnant but we hope to be soon am I ok to hang out in here? Im undiagnosed but am a recovering (with great difficulty) anorexic. Finding not being able to restrict incredibly hard, even if it is for the good of a possible baby and have started to yo-yo between hardly eating before ovulation and eating just under daily recommended calories (1200-1600 depending how I feel) after ovulation.

Im maintaining on average but I think I look bigger, everyone else says I look the same but I think I look massive...and Im not even pregnant yet urgh.

Hope everyone is ok xxx

 

[Love Bunny]

:waves: ola!


Urgh just read a thread about kate moss in general chatter.

GOD SHE MAKES ME SICK!!!!

How can people WANT to be anorexic???? Do they even know ANYTHING about it at all? How would they like to be strapped to a drip and fed through a tube huh? Constant supervision? no privacy? I can't believe some people take this as some kind of optional lifestyle.

Hope you ladies are all okayy

I'm starting to feel a little more positive... I've put on so much weight though and ive completly lost control of my eating Im not even eating loads and loads?? I think its just pregnancy :\ it just makes everything STICK no matter what you eat

Hows everyone else feeling?

How you doing katie?? xX

 

[Windmills]

Ugh, not so good. Seeming to veer between old habits of eating anything and everything as fast as possible.. and then restricting, but not really restricting because I can't. I feel horrible and fat, and I've got 26 weeks of weight gain to go Going to start swimming if I can find a costume, and maybe.. something else low impact? Don't want to overdo it though and not sure I know where the line is.
That thread didn't half wind me up, I kept my bit to a minimum though! Hope you're still feeling positive this evening xx

 

[shocker]

hey *waves* i saw that thread, i couldnt comment on it because i just had too much to say and knew it would end up as a rant some people are idiots, the sad thing is those stupid girls who start down that path dont realise that they're going to end up losing so so much.They all say oh its fine im in control its just a way to lose weight fast, in some cases maybe but the price you pay is losing your mind/health/friends aswell.
Im pretty sure im at my highest weight right now and its the most depressing thing, i know its my own fault not leaving the house and eating nothing but junkfood for the last few weeks.I went to buy jeans today and had to go up a size, i nearly cried in the dressing room.I swore i wouldnt go back to my ways but had a slip up.Its weird though i actually dont care about my body anymore i dont care if im fat although obviously id rather be thin, its a pretty weird feeling.I dont know which is worse, hating your body so much you would destroy it that way or hating it so much you cant be bothered to care anymore.
Hope your still feeling positive love bunny and katie have you thought about pregnancy focused yoga classes? My sisters did them while they were expecting and said they were really nice and relaxing but also helped keep them in good shape

 

[tinybutterfly]

kate moss... what a thing to say... as if we don't have nutcases enough already who
think anorexia is as good as the next fad diet.
i must admit, when my ED started i saw it as a lifestyle too and i do believe i had a choice,
i made the choice over and over not to eat, i made the choice to go puke my food up,
granted, it doesn't really feel like you have a choice but you do... otherwise i would have
never gotten out of this mess when i chose to not puke and chose to have a decent meal

 

[Windmills]

Things like that scare me, I'm awful awful awfulll in groups, I just clam up. I need to find a pregnant friend I've persuaded my lovely mum to start swimming with me though so I'm sorta looking forward to that.
I don't even remember how it first started for me tinybutterfly, it was like one minute I was eating and the next I was vomiting. I think I first used it as a coping mechanism, which it always has been, but for probably 7 years it was a necessity too iykwim? I didn't feel like I had a choice. And if I wasn't pregnant, I can pretty much guarantee I'd be stuck in that cycle again. But now I have to try my hardest to eat sensibly and 'normally' for my baby, and when he/she is here I'm going to try my very very best to continue to eat healthily, exercise normally and generally be sensible because I know I'd never forgive myself if I passed on any of my behaviours or attitude towards my body to my child.
None of that was particularly relevant, but I've been thinking a lot about things lately

 

[walkerscrisps]

Hii,


Been suffering from an eating disorder since I was 11, I have years of psychological abuse from my dad to thank for it, lowest weight was probably 120 ish pounds, and then went from anorexic and not eating to COE and going up to 175lbs that was around 3 weeks ago, I'm now down to 154lbs, even saying it wants to me cry


Hope no-one minds me posting here...

 

[tinybutterfly]

*editted because post was irrelevant since poster i replied to was a fraud*

 

[Windmills]

tinybutterfly, you might want to read the thread 'walkerscrisps' in teen pregnancy xx

 

[shocker]

I wont even comment on that cruel cow i ranted my heart out in my journal already
Im having a tough time keeping myself in line food wise.I've had a few slip ups and im trying to reign it in.I dont want to go back to the way i was The hospital i go to for outpatient have started to actually be helpful, usually theyre useless so its helpful.Ive also made friends with a girl from the hospital whos got an ed aswell so we're getting better together.Its helpful to have her she txts me when shes struggling and i txt her when i am and we talk each other down i guess.Its getting easier, i never thought i'd actually recover i always thought id be 50 and still doing this but now i know that i can change.We all can, hope everyones doing ok

 

[tinybutterfly]

tinybutterfly, you might want to read the thread 'walkerscrisps' in teen pregnancy xx

thanks for that!
the original thread got deleted but it still has a little one that says in short what she did

W T F !!! ugh... some ppl!!!!!!!!!



i think i finally managed to gain a pound, and i'm ok with that so far (i lost 7 being ill and hadn't gained them back yet)...
but my bf telling me he noticed a change in my tummy area... it upsetted
me more than i thought it would... i'd see it as a compliment once i have an
actual bump but i'm barely 7 weeks, so i was like "noooo, not true, not happening"

 

[Windmills]

I'm still like that now!

 

[tasha41]

Hi girls, just wanting to pop in to introduce myself/offer support.

I have been dealing with EDNOS since my early teen years but had body image issues for as long as I can remember. Pregnancy was a struggle, but it really set me on the path toward recovery- or as recovered as I feel I will ever be. I gained 41lbs when I was pregnant, actually gained 41lbs by 37 weeks and lost 5lbs after that before I had my baby due to a mini-relapse and going off work and just sleeping all day. I'm doing well since having Elyse too, I could stand to lose a few lbs to be honest. Have had a few episodes of purging since having her and have abused some laxatives and fasted a couple of times but overall doing well. My story, like all of yours lol, is long and complicated and I don't know what else to say really without being too "wordy" ... Please feel free to PM me if you need anything though, ladies!

 

[Love Bunny]

Hellooo ladies hope your all okii =)

welcome tasha! Its so annoying isn't it right now feeling the way i do I'd be fasting or detoxing if I wasn't pregnant to keep my head level but its like its all over the place cause i know I can't do it!!! I think once you've had an ed there will always be things you do to keep the weight off and control your eating for the rest of your life - even when you have recovered. its not as severe as you would have been when the illness was at its peak but at least its not as damaging too x


shocker - O M F G.

I just blew off in that thread in general.

I seriously cannot believe what a STUPID hearless uneducated cow that woman is. you know it disgusts me what she said - especially coming from another woman! I could understand if it was a bloke but jesus!!!!!!!



I've been staying at my OH's mums for the past week and she had a set of scales

I didn't wanna look but I had to

so far I've gained a stone and a half at nearly 36 weeks

I dunno if thats a little or alot but that seems loads to me ! i'm about 9 and a half stone now - heavyest ive ever been

Scary scary! i'm so lucky I have my OH, he's always stuffing his face so it makes me feel better when we eat together at least

Don't listen to what any idiots have to say about chosing to be ill. you're all beaatutiful ladies

xXx

 

[Drazic<3]

Hey girls,

I am sorry to read all your problems. I was diagnosed with Anorexia at 14, hospitalised on and off and like you all have been through more therapy (and therapists!) than I care to remember, and have since suffered with periods of bulimia and one anorexia remission. The only times I have been 'healthy' I have actually just been overeating and I am now officially overweight. I have been everything between a zero and an 18.

I think when I was pregnant was the first time since I was a child I had eaten healthy. I was having the oorrect amount of calories, didn't gain or lose and ate a mixed diet. When my baby died at 10 weeks it all fell apart really. At first I comfort ate, but in the last 10 or so days I have gone back to severely restricting and purging and have lost 17lbs in 10 days. I have a lot to lose, but I am supposed to be doing it healthily. Problem is, I have no concept of what that means anymore. All I do is drink vodka and avoid eating, it's the only way I know to deal with the hurt.

Ugh, sucks doesn't it. Like you lovebunny, I get SO annoyed with the pro-anorexia BS. It's horrible, it ruins your life and takes over your mind forever. It's nothing nice or glamorous.

 

[Windmills]

Hi Tasha & Katie.. seems like there's quite a few of us now xx
Jess a stone and a half is nothing in pregnancy, you'll lose most of that giving birth!
And Tasha it sounds like you're doing really well! x

 

[fluffpuffin]

I'm really pleased I found this thread. It's comforting to know I'm not the only one dealing with this problem. I first developed anorexia when I was 19, due to emotional pressure / blackmail at home. i didn't think I deserved to eat because I felt I was such a bad person. No-one was there for me to talk to and I didn't trust anyone enough at the time, so starving myself was the only means of taking control & showing people 'look at me, I'm not well!' Well, my now hubby helped me a lot and rescued me from the situation, took me to England & gradually I managed to get better. But I think like a few of you said you never really have a normal relationship with food after this. It takes years and years of hard work. I've been more or les symptom free for 5 years now

I still feel fat and disgusting and misshapen now, but the pregnancy has helped to put it in perspective. I've got another little life to think about & don't want that person to be screwed up about food, nor want to harm it durng the pregnancy. It's so nice to all be able to help each other through the bad days on here. All the best & lots of stregth to everyone, I know how hard it is. xxxx