Any solo mum's out there?

[Lovelymo79]

No, not in the UK. I'm in Texas, USA.

I am going to just skate through this cycle and will get my refund for last cycle and this one and go to another bank.

 

[Caite]

Aww, Mo, your sperm bank sucks! How can they give you 3 rounds with rubbish sperm? Even though it was a rubbish count, I'm wishing you the best of luck for this month. And if it hasn't worked, best of luck for getting a good sperm bank for next month.

 

[Lovelymo79]

Actually 4 rounds of rubbish sperm, Caite. But, it's all good. We shall see how it all ends up. In the meantime, I'm just focusing on other things. But I do have other sperm banks as back up.

 

[Rags]

It's so easy to take the NHS for granted but i have to say i really owe them a huge thank you for DS.
You never know, it only takes 1 to get through though.
Do you know which bank you will try next?

 

[Lovelymo79]

What is NHS?

I am looking at Xytex or Fairfax. I was at California Cryobank.

So I have a friend who got pregnant on her 2nd IUI with a donor who had a decent count. Even though I was told that this last donor had a decent count, I should have known the numbers were too good to be true.

My question is should I just take my money back and run to another bank (even my doctor and nurse thinks California Cryobank is stiffing me) or should I try my friend's donor?

 

[Lovelymo79]

Of course I'm hoping this one is the one, but just thinking one step ahead....

 

[Caite]

Not sure what you should do, Mo, sorry.

The NHS is the British National Health Service - the people who provide all care free at the point of delivery - but even better, they pay my salary!

 

[melodyy_mtb]

Heeeey everyone

So im on cd7 praying for a nice normal ovulating cycle lol. Its my last day on the soy. I've heard it can make you o early so I've started opks and have my donor on standby just in case.

Caite - I feel the same sometimes. It can be a bit overwhelming not coming on here for a day or two and then seeing loads of posts like waaah The wind's been mental hasn't it?! There has been a lot of trees knocked over round here and a brick wall on my road came down.

You're right about the Soy, it can be used like Clomid. It should help bring on o.

KN - When you look at it we really haven't been trying for long. 8/9 tries is nothing compared to some women. Its just heartbreaking every time you see that bfn I'm only on my 3rd actual cycle ttc but it feels like a year already lol. Im the same regarding the clinic route. Its way too expensive. Id have to save for a year or two at least. I 100% agree with you about the ongoing cost of a child. Its not the same.

I wonder why af was so light for you this cycle. You're not on vitex are you? lol. I know it might sound silly but have you tested again? You do hear about women having light bleeds whilst pregnant.

Mo - I'm so so sorry this donor has also turned out to be a dud. I cant believe it Id take the money and run to a new bank. Fresh start and all that, but if you're ok with using the same donor as your friend... why not. I nearly used the same donor as a good friend of mine. He was just a really great guy but luckily i found someone even better.

There is still hope though. All it takes is one little spermy so try not to give up hope for this cycle. xxx

 

[K.N]

Caite - It definitely is hot and sunny! Awfully hot, Sometimes I wish it wasn't so much. NZ is shocking for humid muggy heat, even though we only read at about 31degrees C - It's the density of the air that I find worse.
BUT then I'd rather the heat then your extreme winds and stuff

Mo - I'm so sorry about all your donor troubles Seems like you've really had a rough run with donors - Hopefully it all pans out, would be awesome for this cycle to be a success and then you don't have to worry about donor troubles anymore! It does only take one lucky little swimmer to get through - so x fingers even with a low count, you get a BFP. It would be cool to use the same donor as your friend, if he has a good count etc - for trust things etc, but then some would find it hard using the same donor - I guess it's a case of taking each circumstance into consideration and figuring out what's best in the long term. But again, hopeful that this month is successful and you don't need to worry about it. Positive thinking - has been known to work wonders!!

Melody - You're right - some woman try for much longer than 8/9 months! I'm sure we'll all get our BFP's eventually. Hopefully it not too much time! Fingers crossed. But nah, I haven't tested again, I was thinking I will though - some friends of mine are planning a night together - just a few wines and a catch up, but I want to re-test and see if it's safe to have a glass of wine or not. I haven't taken vitex since early january - so I'm not sure that would have an impact; but AF lasted 2 days, and was very light - on the 2nd day, I was able to use just use a liner it was so light. But I am convinced it was a period rather than implantation spotting, I had all the same symptoms of a period. So who knows, I will test again - just to be sure. But hopes aren't high .

 

[melodyy_mtb]

I know it hurts when you see that bfn but its better to be 100% sure. I was testing all throughout that long cycle, but i had to be sure. Stranger things have happened. My mum had 2 periods before she found out she was 4 months gone, and a girl on a donor forum i'm on thought she had a chemical but the Drs confirmed there was a heartbeat today.

fx for you, but if not at least you can relax and have a laugh with your mates, then we're attacking this next cycle with military precision! lol

 

[Caite]

Personally, I don't think I'd be comfortable using the same donor as a friend. I would just find it a bit weird that the kids would be half siblings.

Just 31 degrees C! 31 degrees is pretty hot - it rarely gets that temperature over here. I get so excited when it gets over 30.

I found out the other day that someone I used to work with a few years ago is pregnant. She said a few years ago that if she wasn't pregnant by the time she was 30, she'd be going down the sperm donor route, and I think she has just turned 32 or 33. I think she's still single, so I think she has probably done it this way.

 

[melodyy_mtb]

Ooo you should speak to her. See if she has any tips!

 

[Caite]

I've not worked with her for at least 2 years, probably longer - I bumped in to her in the co-op about a year ago - I don't think I could ask her. And besides, no one in real life knows about this. My mum, and the rest of my family, really, will be really supportive if/when I get pregnant, but they are really old fashioned and are against any kind of conception which isn't 'natural'.

 

[melodyy_mtb]

I know what you mean. Well my extended family had to get rid of the idea of me conceiving by ni when I came out lol, but no one knows I'm ttc except my mother and a couple of friends.

 

[K.N]

I'm glad I'm not the only one who hasn't told people I'm ttc yet . I have told 3 of my closest friends - who all support the choice 100%. One of them was unsure at first with it being such a big commitment - but she was really good, her & I sat down one day and we just talked about ttc and doing it solo. Really made me think, plenty of pro's and plenty of con's - but we talked about ways around the cons and ways to embrace the pro's - and she very quickly came to accept my decision. My mum and stepdad will be ecstatic when I tell them. They already can't wait for me to have a baby. My sister doesn't know formally - But I'm sure she knows secretly. Or expects it at least. The ones I'm scared about - are the lovely grandparents. Both VERY traditional in the way things are done. And some of my other really good friends. THey'll probably do the whole, "who's the dad, how'de you meet him, tell me evverything" kinda stuff, and really - I don't want to tell everyone everything. So I'll get to that obstacle when I'm pregnant - guess we all will! Whoever gets pregnant first will have to share how they tell people so we can use their advice! .

 

[Caite]

Definitely have to share ways of telling people, KN. My mum will definitely be excited. My nan is also the one I worry about telling the most. She feels sorry for women who get pregnant when they're not married even if they're living with their boyfriend. But, she's in her 80s, so I can forgive her being old-fashioned.

My friends will also want to know about the father. What are you planning on saying to that one? I was just going to say something really vague and then say he doesn't want anything to do with the pregnancy/baby.

 

[Lovelymo79]

Hi all. I'm in the midst of traveling so haven't really been on here. I'm 9dpo and haven't really thought about it much.

I came to Atlanta on Thursday to go to Alabama this past weekend for my great-uncle's funeral. It was great to see my family and they were a great distraction. I'm now on my way back to Atlanta for a few more days before heading back to Texas. I arrive home 13dpo and will test that next morning.

If it's a BFN, then I'm going to a new sperm bank and going on from there. Decided not to use same sperm bank as friend because she is with the same bank that I got the crappy numbers from.

 

[Caite]

Mo, I'm sorry about your great-uncle. But you're off travelling again - you seem to have such an exciting life going everywhere!

 

[Lovelymo79]

Yes, I'm fortunate that I have a career that is flexible, only has me working 3 days a week and I love! I have no family in Texas so I try to get out as often as possible!

 

[Caite]

I worked 3 days a week when I was a nurse and that was full time hours. They were long days, but they were worth it for the 4 days off. Working 5 days a week is killing me!

What do you do for work, Mo?