Any solo mum's out there?

[CanadianMaple]

Thank you. I'm scared about what it would be like doing this alone, but my son's biofather left us when he was an infant and I did well with him on my own. I didn't meet my husband until he was 2, so I know I can do this.

Lining check tomorrow. I hope it's all good to go for next week.

 

[melodyy_mtb]

KN: Aww I know exactly how you feel. There was a time whilst I was discovering all these fertility issues with me, that I questioned if I even wanted to have a baby. But of course we do. The journey may be a little harder and take longer than expected, but that just makes the end result so much more special.

I hope you are feeling a bit more positive now. What worked for me was taking each day one at a time. It is a major possibility that i'll need ivf but I'm not even focusing on that yet. You have a wonderful donor and you've managed to be referred to and be seen by a fertility specialist. This is really good progress so far. Our bodies amaze us all the time. Who knows, you might even be pregnant before your next app. The same thing just happened to some friends of mine.

CanadianMaple: Welcome welcome welcome So good to have you here. I'm so sorry for your loss. I cant imagine the heartache you've been through, but you are so so brave and strong, doing this on your own. Like fairytales said, everyone is so lovely and supportive here. Gl for next week!

afm: I'm due to see donor-b tonight. I'm currently on cd15 and last cycle i o'd on cd17. My opk's are still negative but getting darker. I'm hoping I o by Sunday, but if not, I will be seeing donor-a next week lol.

I hope everyone else is ok. Lots and lots of babydust for the ttc-ers this month

 

[fairytales87]

KN: I can relate 100% to those worries of am I doing the right thing & is this worth it all infact these worries have made me put off trying a few times!! massive

Melody: Fingers crossed for O & a bfp soon

Caite: I hope you are alright after the car accident How's the job hunt going? I just noticed your ticker it's getting so close to you potentially starting to ttc!!!

No ufm at the moment as the forum is public and I don't feel I can share it where everyone can see

 

[melodyy_mtb]

Thanks fairytales, and if you ever want to chat, you know you can pm me x

 

[Keebs]

K.N Hi. Sorry you are having such a tough time, ttc is much akin to putting ourselves through an emotional wringer. It's hard to want something so much and yet have so little control over events (get everything right and still only 20% chance of conception.... aaaaargh, who thought that was a good idea?). I do think it's healthy that, as your path changes, you are reflecting and reassessing what you really want. To doggedly chase something just becuase, is not the way happiness lies.

Hang in there, we are all rooting for you

Caite Ack to a bump! Other drivers scare the bejesus out of me, hope you are ok. Did you find a car?

CanadianMaple Welcome, so sorry to hear of your loss. I agree with melody, you are a very strong woman. Hope the lining check went well and lots of luck and for next week. I can only imagine how you feel right now

melodyy_mtb Good luck with donor B tonight, sounds like this could be a prefectly timed donation

fairytales87 You sound excited about events, everything crossed it goes how you want it.


As for me, don't think I've ovulated after all. Temps briefly rose but flatlined ever since. No idea what's going on. Never appreciated how lucky I was to have such regular cycles before. For now I'm just monitoring temps until AF appears. Waiting is pants

 

[Caite]

I'm fine after the bump. Suffered nothing but a slight bruise from the seatbelt which only hurt if I prodded it. I've found a new car now, just waiting for the cheque from the insurance company which should arrive any day now.

To be honest, I'm really enjoying being bank at the moment that I perhaps haven't been as focused on job hunting as I should have been. I feel as though I have, for the first time in years, the ability to actually have a life and not have to plan everything around work. I know some people work shifts their entire working lives, but, including my time as student nurse and a student midwife, I've been working shifts for 9 years and I'm just so tired of them. I don't think I want something with shifts - I want a normal Monday to Friday 9-5 job - and I think until I can find that, I will just stay on the bank. I'm not sure what that is going to mean for TTC - I think I need to save up some money for maternity leave first, as I think I probably did misread the policy - so I think TTC is going to be on hold until some time next year, which is massively disappointing but more practical for me.

Anyway - Melody, FX one of these donations has worked.

Canadianmaple - I hope the scan went well.

Keebs - sorry about ovulation. If it hasn't happened already, I hope it happens soon.

 

[CanadianMaple]

I forgot to update. My lining check was great. It was at 13 and triple stripe. They just needed it to be at 8. I started IM progesterone injections today. Less than 2 days until my transfer.

 

[fairytales87]

Caite: I know what you mean about the shifts & banking being a nice wee change I'm the same I'm still looking for my ideal job and if anything I want comes up I will apply if not I will just stay bank the only downside to it is the no maternity leave etc but we can't have everything I guess
I hope even if you put ttc off until next year your still going to be around here?

Canadian maple: I'm so pleased your lining check went great fingers crossed for a successful transfer Goodluck

No update from me as things are too much for a public forum just now and sadly I don't even have any of my girls I can talk to about at the moment and I think my body officially hates me right now too

 

[Caite]

Fairytales, I hope things improve for you soon.

Yeah, I'm still going to be around. You never know, I might go on NHS jobs next week and find the perfect job! To be honest, I'm not even sure what I want to do at the moment. I love midwifery, hate the shifts - even community involves weekend work.

Canadianmaple - that's good about your lining. Not long til transfer now then! Exciting!

 

[K.N]

Hey lovely ladies

I've had my follow up appointment, where my fertiity specialist had over looked my file - and decided that he'd rather me give IUI an attempt prior to beginning IVF; But also advised 3 months of metformin, and then 3 months of clomid - and hope that either of those 6 months is successful. The waiting list currently for IUI is 20 months, and IVF even longer (insanely long!!) - So I'm on the waiting list, I decided I'd rather be on the list - and drop off it if anything happened between now and then, otherwise if I waited; that 20 month wait isn't going anywhere. Will do a bit more of an update a bit later, but will probably be on my blog rather than here But feel free to check if you want too x
I'm going to try be more active though now that I've got some answers; I'm feeling a lot better about myself and my choices.

Fairytales - Understandable; if you ever want to talk in private; feel free to pm me if you want Here for you!!

Canadianmaple - Welcome to this forum So sorry to hear of your loss though, couldn't imagine how hard it must have been for you! If you already had the frozen blasts, does that mean that this baby will be your husbands? You definitely can do this - us woman are so much stronger than people give us credit for! Hope that everything goes well x

Caite - Scary! Other drivers are so bad sometimes huh! Just today we nearly got sidewiped by another car! We were driving on a straight road where a turning car decided to turn right into us; and completely skip the medium strip to merge into traffic! Probably hard to imagine; I don't know what the roads are like over there - but it was pretty freaky! Lucky the driver of our car had quick thinking and a loud horn!!

Keebs - You're so right, your words of wisdom!! 20% of conception is insane huh, with assisted conception too. Sigh! Thanks so much for support though! At the moment you ladies are all I've got - So it means so much! xxx

Melody - Any idea on how your donor meeting went, did you ovulate properly etc?
I hope you ovulated - being that it's now Tuesday Two week wait starts huh, longest 2 weeks ever are these ones! Those non ttcers really don't understand how much a single day can mean!

 

[CanadianMaple]

My FET is today! I have been up since 4:30am. I'm both nervous and excited. I think I am more worked up about everything I have to do before I go. I still need to meet a nurse friend my my progesterone shot and and go into work for a bit. I need to rely on others to get my son from his little morning day camp to a babysitter's. Antibiotics are in. Estrogen gel is on. I just have to drink water on the way to the clinic...the transfer is at noon.

Funny you asked about if my husband is the father. We actually struggled with IF. He had azoospermia and had a sperm extraction procedure 2 days before he passed away. They didn't find any sperm and we went with our donor backup. He was so at peace with it all, I feel so sad that he didn't even know we got so many embryos. He totally got me here.

 

[melodyy_mtb]

Hey ladies

CanadianMaple Good luck with your FET today. Try not to let it get you down, that you're doing this alone. I'm sure your husband is watching over you, making sure everything goes ok. He'd be so proud of you. You're so brave. That was great news about your lining. I'm really excited for you. Lots and lots of babydust coming your way hun.

Keebs Oh hun, I hope you did o! I know that feeling,thinking you're going to have a normal cycle and that you o'd but only to have it go on and on, waiting for af. Stay positive though. It aint over until af shows her ugly head lol.

Caite Glad you found a new car! I'd be the same as you, not knowing what questions to ask etc. Anyway, i hope you find a permanent job soon.

KN IUI? That's good. At least your doctor sees the potential in you conceiving semi-naturally. And anyway, 6 months gives you hopefully 6 tries with meds... I think you'll be seeing that BFP waaay before 6 months is up! I cant wait to get on clomid or metaformin lol. I'm glad you're feeling a bit better. Just remember to relax, and put your needs first. Stress free is the key to a bfp I cant tell you how goood it feels to not stress over constant charting etc. Just take each day as it comes.

AFM Met my donor last Friday, which went really well, he's great. My opks were getting darker, so I was sure o was approaching. Going by last cycle, I should have o'd by last sunday. But I should know better than to think my womb would play nice lol.

I never got my pos opk, but my temp seems to be rising. So either I o'd and the opk didnt pick it up, or my temp is just fluctuating and im not yet in the tww as I havent o'd yet. The third possibility, which is the depressing one is that I'm not going to o at all this month and my cycle will go on for weeks Hopefully that wont happen.

I'm praying that I o'd or that I will soon. I'm still testing, luckily my donors are both on standby, so if i see a pos opk, i can call them straight away. I'll let you ladies know if ff confirmed o or not.

I hope everyone else is ok. Haven't heard from a few people in a while

 

[CanadianMaple]

Thank you Melodyy! I hope you get your pos OPK soon! I had long cycles like that with my PSOS and it just to drive me nuts.

The FET is done. Now I need to wait until July 7 for my first beta. The FET was easy, other than the really full bladder they make you have.

 

[melodyy_mtb]

Yeah its so frustrating, it can get me really down. But aww thanks, I hope so too.

So happy your FET went well. FX for the 7th of July. Keep us posted.

 

[Caite]

Canadianmaple - I'm so excited you've had your FET. I really hope it went well and that it worked.

KN - that's good that your doctor is having you try 'naturally' before doing anything more invasive, and that s/he thinks you will only need IUI. I'm with Melody - I'm sure you'll get your BFP long before the 6 months. And I kind of think I know what you mean about the road. I live fairly rural, so there are mostly little country roads with one main road by me. The nearest dual carriageway is probably about 15 minutes drive away and I'm miles (absolutely miles) from a motorway, so the road markings are all very basic.

Melody - I do hope this cycle is on track for you. Did you get a donation the other day anyway, just in case? Did you receive that book yet? Have you read it? What did you think about it?

I've been working hard this week - done about 40 hours in the last couple of days. I'm trying to work more hours so I can start saving money, which I will use for if I don't get a permanent job and therefore don't have decent maternity pay (obviously assuming I get a BFP when I start TTC!).

 

[unicornwish]

Hi ladies
Just heard about this thread & wanted to introduce myself, I'm 32, single & straight. Have a 3 year old son who was conceived in a relationship which has now ended & would like to complete my family using an anonymous donor (most probably through IUI).
I have had ovulation issues in the past but my son was conceived on my first cycle of clomid.
I've only got as far as looking at UK clinics (the London sperm bank seems best bet).
Planning to go ahead maybe late autumn/early winter?
Looking forward to sharing my journey & offering support 😊 x

 

[somedayisnow]

Hi Everyone,

I have my first appointment with an RE tomorrow. Finally! It's a consultation so I don't know if all we're going to do is talk or if he's going to have me take a few tests. Anyway, I'm bringing a list of the supplements I currently take plus ones I plan to take. Even if he doubts their value, I'm still going to take them as long as he agrees that they won't hurt me or my chances to get pregnant.

From what I've heard and read about him, he's nice, sensitive, and completely competent. He runs the clinic so that's a plus and since I live in LA I figure he's used to treating women in their 40s. *crosses fingers*

Is it crazy that I don't want to have my first IUI until September/October? I know being 41.5 means that time is of the essence but I want to make sure that I have at least 3 full months of prental vitamins (and all the rest of the supplements) in my system before I get pregnant (this is me being positive). I also want to begin fertility acupuncture starting the first week of July. I just want to make sure that my body is as healthy and prepared as it can be for the first IUI with donor sperm. Also are there specific questions I should ask the RE?

 

[Caite]

Somedayisnow - I don't think it's crazy that you want to get a few months of supplements in first. I guess the fact that you're in your 40s makes it even more important that you do as much as possible to prepare for a pregnancy, and a 3 months wait isn't really that long.

Unicornwish - welcome to our little thread. I'm wanting to go the clinic route but was put off using a UK clinic for a few reasons. Firstly they are really expensive and secondly, I wanted an anonymous donation. Anonymous donation is not available in the UK, children have the right to find out the name and details of the donor at 18 (or 16 of getting married). I've been looking in to clinics abroad and I think I will use one in Denmark. From what I remember when I was looking at different countries, Spain also does anonymous donations for single women.

 

[melodyy_mtb]

Caite I haven't had a chance to read it yet, I've been so busy! But it looks good. Aww thanks, yeah I hope so too. I did manage to get a donation so fx. Hope you're not exhausted from all those shifts, but it's good you're able to start saving up for ttc

unicornwish Welcome Always great to see a new face. I think its great that you're wtt your second one and that you're doing it on your own. I've heard wonderful things about the London Fertility Clinic. I look forward to following you on your journey. x

somedayisnow Its not crazy at all. That's why a lot of women are wtt. I spent years researching and months taking supplements etc before I began ttc. Let us know how your RE app went. I've got my first on Friday so I'm not sure what questions you should ask sorry. GL x


Ahhh I'm freaking out ladies! My first official fertility app is on Friday and I just realised, I have no idea what I'm going to say about my donor! My doctor knows that I'm ttc on my own, but I wonder if the clinic are going to want to see/speak to my donor. I've been reading about all the fertility tests they need. I've done all my ones, but what about sperm analysis? I'd rather involve my donor as little as possible. Should I just say I'm using a sperm bank? lol I've actually seen my donor's sperm results, so I guess I could just say it's a friend and that I've already seen the results What if they turn me away? I know that Im the one with fertility issues, so hopefully they wont want to talk about him much.

Oh and it looks like I'm having another anovulatory cycle No pos opks and my temps aren't changing. If i go by my last cycle, AF is due on Thursday so i pray that it comes, because usually my anovulatory cycles can be extra extra long

 

[somedayisnow]

Hello Ladies! I already posted most of this in the over 35 section but figured I can put this here too.

I had my first appointment with an RE today and it went better than I expected. To be honest, I thought he'd be all doom and gloom about my age (41) but he wasn't. Of course, age was part of the conversation but we spent the majority of time going over my health history and creating a plan of action.

It wasn't until today that I realized that I was already labeling myself as having fertility problems when my fertility is really unknown at this point. I have an ultrasound tomorrow to check for fibroids (just a precaution) and the HSG will take place in July. I think I'm having the blood test for AMH and FSH done this week too. It's both amazing and scary just how fast everything seems to be moving.

My doctor's plan is to try an unmedicated IUI first. If that doesn't work he'll put me on Clomid for cycle 2. Around cycle 4 or 5 he'll have me do both Clomid and a trigger shot. Hopefully, I'll be one of the lucky ones and not need to get to cycle 4 or 5.