Anyone else now trying again STRAIGHT after a mc? NTNP?

[Lozdi]

Burgers! Hahahaha!

(Now I want a burger)

With my new OPK's and old OPK's I now have 75 sticks to pee on. Will commence POAS when AF leaves, which should be in 2 or 3 days.

I should be 17 weeks this week. Feels weird.

 

[Mrs Miggins]

I would have been 17 weeks today too Loz. It's 7 weeks today since my mc. What would your due date have been? Mine was May 15th. I was looking forward to having a May baby

 

[Lozdi]

I never had it officially worked out from a scan (that was what was supposed to happen at my 12 week scan) but I knew when my LMP was and a online due date calculator gave me may 17th. I was looking forward to a May baby very much, having 2 november babies.

 

[Lozdi]

Oh blimey, if I dont catch the eggy until Feb, I will have 3 november babies! Then my winter seasons will get even more expensive! My boys have birthdays on the 8th and 28th of Nov, and the yougest (8th) was 2 weeks early, he was due on the 22nd. I swear everyone in my life has their birthday in the 2nd half of the year!

 

[Mrs Miggins]

I never got to a scan either, that was the date the midwife worked out for me at my booking appointment. My Dd was a November baby too! My friend who announced she was pregnant the week I had my first mc had her baby last week, which makes me feel a bit strange! I haven't seen him yet.

 

[Lozdi]

I have angry and frustrated feelings about my booking appointment. I asked the midwife then, do they listen for a heartbeat, and she said well no because its not always heard and can cause panic. The irony is, at my 8 week booking appointment, my baby was already dead, and there would have been no heartbeat. And panic. And a diagnosis of MMC ONE WHOLE MONTH earlier than what actually occurred. I think at my next booking appointment, the midwife will find me to be the absolute patient from HELL. I have been told by one of the nurses who looked after me during the medical that next time I get pregnant to bypass the gp system and call them for a reassurance scan.

I understand the need to make the standard booking appointment at 8 weeks, the midwife even explained its because a lot of losses occure before 8 weeks but they obviously dont count a MMC as a posibility. I have seen how much small portable ultrasound scans cost, and its less than a grand. Would it kill them to have them at booking clinics??? GAH! This is an area of soreness for me...can you tell? Heck, I'd fund raise for it myself! I might actually have a word, and see if its a possibility! They could even get one and do small 'take a peek scans' at the bookings and also for pregnant women at any stage but maybe charge them a fiver a scan if its just to see the baby and not for a medical reason. That would recoup the costs in less than a year. I need a job high up in the medical finances area!

 

[Mrs Miggins]

It is frustrating. I'm not a one to jump up and down and shout at people, but I shall really push for an early scan next time. When I rang the midwife to tell them about my last pregnancy I asked about the possibility of an early scan as I had miscarried last time, but she said as I had had a successful pregnancy it was unlikely I would miscarry again. Well, I did. But certainly in my local health authority they don't look at you until you have had 3. My two losses weren't mmc anyway, so in that respect I was "lucky". My first loss occurred at 6 weeks and I started bleeding at 7 so I wouldn't count that as missed, and the second ended very suddenly at 10 weeks, with most symptoms still there the day I started bleeding. So an early scan would be reassuring but I would still have the fear it could end suddenly like the last one did.

 

[loubyloumum]

I have told my hubby if we don't get an early scan next time we will pay to have a private one done as I know I will be stressing out with worry the whole time as 12weeks is such a long time to wait.

I did ask ay my ultrasound that confirmed everything had passed naturally if we would be offered an early scan next time and I was told the same as you Mrs Mig. Because I have had a successful pregnancy it is unlikely to happen again therefore I wouldn't require one. But as we all now this doesn't really help us with our worries. Our local health authority also doesn't offer anything like that until you have had 3.

 

[Emum]

Shocking news for us last night, so advice needed please ladies.

DH got home from his business trip around 9.30, got out of the cab outside our house and saw 3 men peering through our kitchen window obviously trying to break in. Being the have a go hero that he is, he confronted them and got quite badly beaten up for his pains. Was knocked to the ground and kicked several times in the head He's been checked out by A and E and no lasting damage, just need to be careful and follow head injuries protocol for next few days.

Now obviously, this put more than a dampner on our BD plans last night and probably tonight too. Just wondering where people think we stand. I had positive OPK and EWCM on Sunday and we BDd am and pm. Had first CBFM peak yesterday but CM was thick and creamy (dare I say even lumpy!) and obviously no BDing yesterday. Second Peak today and temp was up a bit this morning but don't know if it is up enough to signify OV as my early temps this month were really erratic. Might we still be in with a chance do you think or has the ship sailed for this month.

Don't mean this to sound heartless as obviously I am very worried about DH and shocked about what happened, but also quite focussed on our TTC journey and this happened at exactly the wrong time in the month.

 

[ickle pand]

I'm definitely going to get an early scan next time (I actually wrote "this time" first, how's that for PMA?) I've been looking into clinics in the area and I think the earliest is 7weeks but it's worth it IMO. If I got my BFP this month I'd be 7 weeks the week of what would've been my due date, so there's no way I'd be sane and rational without a scan.

My due date would've been the 2nd of Jan so it's getting really close now. I'll be glad once it's past though. It feels like it's looming over me. I'd love another BFP first though that would make it so much easier to deal with.

 

[Mrs Miggins]

Hell fire Emum! I'm reading this while walking down the street to work (such is my b&b addiction) and haven't had time to fully digest what you have just said, and I need to look where I am going cos I keep slipping on ice, but didn't want to read and run. Will reply properly shortly when I am inside just want to say I hope you are both ok. Big hug.

 

[ickle pand]

Emum - what a horrible thing to happen to your DH! Glad he's ok. I'd say you'll probably be covered, as it sounds like you ov'd yesterday but if he's up to it, then another BD wouldn't do any harm.

 

[Lozdi]

I'm still veryn newbish when it comes to the fier points of pinpointing the fertile window, so can't answer that one.

OH MY GOODNESS about your DH, I'm glad he has the all clear! 3 of them and one of him and yet he wasnt seriously hurt- hero indeed! Were you in at the time? My mum was broken into a few months ago it was a shocker they were all in asleep and the thief/s took lots of tech stuff, laptop, iphone, ps3...the iphone and the laptop were right next to my sleeping little brothers bed. When I say little brother, he is younger yes but built like a brick outhouse and about 6'3. He is a total gentle giant but the robbers wouldnt have known that, mum and I had sleepless nights for weeks thinking how it could have gone if he had woken up, given that he looks far more of a threat than he actually is.

About the early scans. Midwifes in my area would say no to an early scan, even after a MMC, and my gp says too that I'd not get one. But the opinion on the matter that actually counts, is who sees you at the EPAU. And that lady told me, that they do reassurance scans at 6 weeks, then I pointed out that 6 weeks would not reassure me at all. She then said that in my case, 8 weeks would be better, seeing as baby stopped at 7. All i'd have to do is call them myself if the midwife refused. If a midwife refuses to reassure me during my next pregnancy, I'll make trouble for her I'll tell you that now! No more miss nice patient!

 

[Lozdi]

Hi Louby, if you do want to have a private scan there is babybond, they have clinics all over the UK, it was where I was going to go for a gender scan (that would have been this week too they have decent reviews)

The impression that I got from the people I saw over my MMC, that the word 'reassurance' when asking for a scan during pregnancy is almost like a keyword, much like 'breach of the peace' said in a call to the police to get them to arrive fast (I just heard that, no idea if its true lol). 'Early scan' implies that you just want an early peak, and I expect they get asked alot to do early peeks by women who have no real need to be reassured. At the end of the day, if you cant eat sleep or relax due to not knowing, and needing to be reassured about your pregnancy, then its a health issue and they should do a reassurance scan asap. Forget the midwife if she cant see the need to be reassured, and go straight to EPAU, they have a much better understanding as they have the women in there daily, having dc's or medicals. I'm not knocking midwifes, but I heard nothing from mine since my scan appointment, they clearly don;t have any dealings with miscarriage victims. I had a doctor, a young clearly studenty doctor, telling me that because I had MMC I NEEDED A D AND C IMMEDIATELY ELSE I WILL GET AN INFECTION I use caps because I am demostrating the urgency in which he delivered me this info. I was livid, I gave him what for, and demanded to see a 'proper doctor' which resulted in a consultant visiting me. I informed this consultant of what I had been told and he was rather angry at this young doctor, who started spluttering then left the room. Needless to say, the young one kept well out of my way apart from when he absolutely had to see me. The point of this tale, is that sometimes you have to fight hard to get your reassurance. The young doctor also refused to scan me after the main MC, but I put my foot down, and he gave in. And then I was reassured that nothing was still attached, just waiting to come out. I even got another scan 3 weeks after hospital to confirm no retained tissues. They usually use HCG test to determine that, but again, I put my foot down. DO NOT be afraid to put you foot down about your reassurance. AS long as you do it without becoming aggressive to the staff, otherwise you go down a bad road.

Sorry for the super long post! When I feel strongly about something, I dont shut up!

 

[loubyloumum]

OMG Emum I'm so sorry to hear about you OH. I don't understand the way some peoples minds work at times sending you both

 

[auntylolo]

Hiya girls! I would so love to join you, as I have spent the last couple of weeks reading this entire thread and you all seem lovely and just a bit bonkers!
I am now in my first cycle since my mmc was discovered at 9 weeks, it seems like I've been waiting for ages for to show, never thought I'd be so happy to see her! But, she is being pretty mean so far heavy and very clotty (tmi?).

I am a poas-aholic I have opks ready, and also a cbfm ready to go for the first time this month. I'm pretty clueless as to what my body should do cos I was on bc for about 14 years for painful periods and then it was just handy that they also stopped you getting pregnant! I got married in July, and my first cycle trying caught the egg. I had one cycle 32 days so that's the only "normal" I have to go off.

Reading through this thread I have also decided to track my temps, so just ordered a bbt thermometer this morning. Will it matter if I'm a few days into my cycle before putting in the first temp? I am a bit concerned about managing to do it at the same time every morning and after 3 hours of unbroken sleep because we have an 8 month old puppy who about 50% of the time needs to go out during the night and then occasionally wanders into our bedroom so I have to get up and put him back to bed. Both dogs come are allowed on our bed from about 6-6.30 on a morning and that always wakes me so can I take my temp then and just input it later?

One more thing (I promise!), I've had a fertility spell cast for me specifically for twins and then a protection spell will be cast for baby once I'm pregnant. Anyone had anything like this done or considered it?

 

[Lozdi]

Hi there Lolo, your like me! I read the whole thing first, and by the time I had, I was halfway healed! Theres a lot of support here, and the first rule is this: There is never too much info! Things most people consider TMI are openly discussed here!

The other ladies here are much more expert than me at FF and POAS, I'm the newbie, I was on BC for years too between pregnancies (caught while on BC lol) So I feel I'm just learning my cycle properly aswell. I'm also on first AF since the MMC. Mine was discovered at 12 week scan, baby 7 weeks no h/b.

I have no idea about charting a cycle but missing out the first few temps, but one of the experts will be able to enlighten you on that. I struggle to temp at regular time, I just try my best. I would suggest temping vaginally (twinkle temping) as it eliminates problems such as mouth breathing during the night. I temp both and my twinkle temps are steady ish but the oral ones fluctuate like crazy. I hope my ramble helps!

Atm, I treat FF as an exercise in observing my cycle, but its the OPK's I will trust when the time comes, at least until FF has my cycle worked out.

You are in the right place, your going to fit right in- slight loopiness is a must!

 

[ickle pand]

Auntylolo - Sorry for your loss. I can't believe you're another one who's read this entire thread lol!

Temping a couple of days into a cycle is fine. I often give myself a few days off and your temps can be erratic during AF anyway. The time you input your temp doesn't matter at all, it's the time you take it that's important. During the week I input it pretty much straight after I take it because I get up then but at the weekends, I go back to sleep after I temp and input it when I wake up. My therm saves the last temp.

I've never had any spells or readings done, but I'm quite cynical about things like that. If it gives you peace of mind though, then it's worth it

 

[Lozdi]

Blimey I got so busy ranting about FF and such I forgot to say, sorry for your loss Lolo.

 

[Lozdi]

Oh dear I have a memory like a sieve today I forgot to answer the spell question too. I did think of fertility spells, and maybe seeing a fortune teller- but with a teller they could be just doing it for money, with no skill. I did use a pendulum alot during my last pregnancy, and I wish I hadn't. I'm not sure whether or not I should elaborate because I don;t want any of you picking up a pendulum when you get your BFP's. If you can all promise me you wont touch one, then I'll tell you what happened. If not, dont worry!

I have a bag of moonstone near my computer all times, I have heard of people getting pregnanct after long term TTC just after they acquire a moonstone, but then again, that may well be a coincidence. I sold one once and got a message a month later from the lady who told me she bought it for her daughter who was having trouble falling pg, and she became pg that cycle- funnily enough that was the same cycle I got pg with my youngest, and then several ladies in our social circle fell pg too! Who knows? I would never suggest a stone to help conceive but the properties of moonstone are very feminine, its a ladies crystal. Belief makes a big difference.

If you want a protection spell for your baby then go for it. I'm not sure if a spell for twins could work though! It seems quite a claim, think what your body has to do to create twins it might be best not to spell for them, but just see what happens. Research foods and supplements that may increase egg release, but always be super wary of things that you put into your temple.

I'm so ranty and typy today! Sorry for all the walls of text Ladies, I'm in the know it all mood today so it seems