Anyone just had a baby and WTT, NTNP, or TTC?

[babydreams85]

Our amazing son was born just over 2 weeks ago on Valentine's Day, and he is just the love of our lives!

I can't believe I am thinking about this already when he is so young, but DH wants to start TTC again very soon. He is 11 years older than I am and he doesn't want to wait much longer to add to our family. We were blessed with our son because he is such a great baby, but I am so afraid I won't be as lucky with #2. Also nervous because DH works out of town and is gone 4-6 days per week, so I would pretty much be by myself with two babies close together in age. Then there is the fact that I had SUCH a difficult pregnancy, I had several complications and was hospitalized multiple times. I know that no two pregnancies are alike, and chances are I wouldn't have those issues again, but it's still in the back of my mind.

Right now DH knows it's out of the question to even DTD as I had two major tears and an epi with DS, and I plan to wait the full 6 weeks to even THINK of him going anywhere near that area!!!!!!!!! However, I know he isn't going to want to use any form of BC when we do go back to being intimate, so I guess we will end up NTNP. I am also exclusively breastfeeding, which I know keeps some women from ovulating at all. I do want two close together, but I also want to be able to enjoy our son!!!

Any other ladies in similar situations? Am I crazy for even considering having two so close in age????????????

 

[armywife11]

I am WTT at the moment. I would like my kids to be close in age but I want to wait 12 months at least to give my body time to heal and get back to normal. I am also EBF and haven't begun ovulating (to my knowledge). I am the one wanting them close hubby is still on the fence. We both have sibling close in age and we would like the same thing if possible.

But like you mentioned we are going to discuss it closer t that time because two babies can be a lot to handle and he may not be around all the time because of his current job. I have friends who did the close together and far apart so they have both provided pros and cons.. it just depends and no one way is perfect.

 

[babydreams85]

Yes I'm getting the same. Some people act like I have lost my mind and advise that I wait AT LEAST two years. Others are very supportive and tell me that having them close in age is so much easier than having them further apart. I am torn at this point, but really I would prefer waiting a minimum of 6 months. I do understand where DH is coming from, but he's not the one who has to be pregnant again!!!!! LOL

 

[Mrs Dragonfly]

Congrats on your Valentine's baby

I've yet to be pregnant so I can't speak from experience, but if it were me I would wait a few months before even considering NTNP or TTC. I would wait at least 6 months so that you have time for your body to rest up from the difficult pregnancy & birth and your LO will be a little bit older.

 

[Pearls18]

2 weeks is still quite early to know what kind of baby you have, DS slept fine till 4 months then was a nightmare lol. But just to warn you doctors advise at least 12 months between pregnancies, BF suppresses ovulation and this is nature's way of protecting women from pregnancy too soon so it's just worth thinking about.

 

[babydreams85]

Marine, I sure hope he doesn't do that! LOL I know it's still early but I am keeping my fingers crossed that he won't change!!!!!!

Thanks for the advice ladies!

 

[Pearls18]

Marine, I sure hope he doesn't do that! LOL I know it's still early but I am keeping my fingers crossed that he won't change!!!!!!

Thanks for the advice ladies!

Lol sorry I don't want to be one of 'those' mums trying to put you off, but just to warn you. He must be a good baby if he's making you broody already, I'm still nervous 2 years and 5 months later haha!

 

[Mrs_Dutch15]

My DS is almost 6 months and even with all of his challenges so far (preemie, allergies, GERD) he is still the greatest blessing. I also had a hard pregnancy and recovery. As much as I'd love another one right away, I also want some time to just enjoy him (the time FLIES by so quickly). I do want to give my body a chance to recuperate as well. I'm not using any birth control but being pretty careful with timing. I'm hoping to wait until my DS is about a year to become pregnant again.

 

[Leinzlove]

I'm with you girl. Thinking NTNP tonight and TTC next month. Wasn't sure at first, thought about waiting until September... But, now its a go!

I'm crazy and I don't care. We are just going to see what happens. And we are anxious to have our family completed. I really don't care what people will think or say. And I'm sure some will have thier unwelcomed opinions.

I have DD #1 whom is 22 months old. Started trying for #2 when she was 5 months (took 8 months with a loss). And DD #2 is 6 weeks old. I haven't had first AF and she isn't sleeping through the night...

 

[babydreams85]

Ah Leinz, glad I'm not the only one even considering it! Even if he wasn't a good baby (so far) I would still feel the same way. I am like you, just anxious to complete our family (not quite as anxious as DH, but I do really want the first two close together). I also don't particularly care what people will say, LOL. My mom thinks I am absolutely insane for thinking about another after such a difficult pregnancy and THIS soon after delivery. TBH I was thinking about it DURING my pregnancy lol.

 

[Leinzlove]

I'm not saying its not a bit crazy. But, its done all the time. And most of the time back to back pregnancies are normal. There are always risks no matter when you get pg or not.

I've uped my intake of green leaf veggies and protein. And I've continued my prenatals. And we had a long family planning conversation this morning. We've decided to wtt until I have my first AF, which should arrive any day now.

 

[zilla]

So glad I found this thread!
My LO is 12 weeks old tomorrow & he's a very good baby (so far at least).
I'm thinking about starting to NTNP soon (although when I fell pregnant with him after coming off the pill, we were expecting it to take 12-18 months of NTNP & then 6 weeks later I was pregnant, lol).
OH wants to wait a couple of months, so LO will be 5-6 months old when we start trying.
I'm an only child so I don't know what its like to have any sort of age gap between siblings, but I do know that I want my children to be close in age - I don't want to get used to not having to do night feeds, or change nappies etc - I'd rather have it all in one big hit instead of a few spaced out.
Only problem is that we live in a small 2 bed, (rented), OH wants to have at least 75% of our deposit for buying a 3 bed before LO #2 is born.
I haven't told any of my family or friends that we're even considering it; they will probably just tell us that we're crazy!
Besides, I read somewhere on the internet that sibling rivalry is at the lowest point when #1 is under 18 months when #2 is born, and then they're going to be able to play together more than brothers/sisters with a 3-4 year age gap for example.

Sorry I didn't mean to type so much then

 

[Leinzlove]

Hi Zilla: I'm happy I found this thread also. I started ttc #2 5 months after #1... but it was an 8 month journey. My girls are 20 months apart and I love it.

I can understand the need for more space. We have a 3 bedroom house and its large and enough for probably 5. However, we plan on having our girls share a big room and put baby #3 in the smaller room for now.

I can't explain baby fever. But, I'm totally ready to complete our family. I definitley agree with them being the best of friends, close and enjoying the same things.

I ordered Opks and PG tests. When did AF arrive for you? I'm patiently waiting for her anyday. But, I doubt it will happen the first month of trying, but it could.

 

[zilla]

Hi Zilla: I'm happy I found this thread also. I started ttc #2 5 months after #1... but it was an 8 month journey. My girls are 20 months apart and I love it.

I can understand the need for more space. We have a 3 bedroom house and its large and enough for probably 5. However, we plan on having our girls share a big room and put baby #3 in the smaller room for now.

I can't explain baby fever. But, I'm totally ready to complete our family. I definitley agree with them being the best of friends, close and enjoying the same things.

I ordered Opks and PG tests. When did AF arrive for you? I'm patiently waiting for her anyday. But, I doubt it will happen the first month of trying, but it could.

OH wants to wait 3 months, I'd start now but we'll see!
that sounds nice with them sharing, it'll definately be good for them being close !
Um, still no AF! (which is sort of why we're trying soon, in a weird way) ...
The past 2 weeks I've felt really weird - tired, crampy, sore boobs, nausea, loss of appetite etc - which we thought could have been another pregnancy. When we first thought this, we were both terrified & weren't happy about the prospect of another baby so soon. But I adjusted to the idea and by the time I got a negative PG test last week and realised I was dissapointed at the result, we realised that we would actually be happy having another one quite soon. But no AF at the moment, but I suspect that as my symptoms don't mean PG, they might mean my body is settling back down & hopefully I'll get AF soon. Noticed EWCM this week so maybe all those symptoms were me O'ing. Going to start charting soon, anyway.

How are you finding it with 2 babies? xx

 

[staralfur]

I agree with everything MarineWAG has said.

It's not crazy if you're sure it's what you want, but (and maybe I'm way off) I got the impression from your OP that you may be a bit hesitant for a few reasons.

If you're 100% comfortable with it then go for it. If not, I'd just take it month by month.

 

[Leinzlove]

Are you talking about me being hesitant? I don't think I am. But, I do worry about a healthy pregnancy and MC. But, I would no matter when we TTC again.

Everyone should wait until they are ready... And its a personal decison.

I love having two babies. But, they are easy and I had it rough with DD #1. She was born with birth defects and required major surgries. She also had feeding issues and had to be special fed and weight gaining issues. DD #2 is healthy and alot easier and together its much easier. Maybe because we waited for children in part, or that I love it so much. Or that I'm used to caring for children being the oldest of 10 kids.

Zilla: No AF, yet? Are you BF? I sure hope mine doesn't take long to return. I was thinking she should arrive any day now.

 

[zilla]

Are you talking about me being hesitant? I don't think I am. But, I do worry about a healthy pregnancy and MC. But, I would no matter when we TTC again.

Everyone should wait until they are ready... And its a personal decison.

I love having two babies. But, they are easy and I had it rough with DD #1. She was born with birth defects and required major surgries. She also had feeding issues and had to be special fed and weight gaining issues. DD #2 is healthy and alot easier and together its much easier. Maybe because we waited for children in part, or that I love it so much. Or that I'm used to caring for children being the oldest of 10 kids.

Zilla: No AF, yet? Are you BF? I sure hope mine doesn't take long to return. I was thinking she should arrive any day now.

Sorry to hear about her health issues - is she doing OK now?
Wow, 9 silblings!I don't have any which I guess is why I want lots of LO's - I was an only child & it sucked, big time.
Nope, no AF. & no BFing either, even though occasionally they are still leaking which is driving me mad.
The other week I was getting the occasional braxton hicks too?! No idea why.
How long did AF take to return before? Did you have many signs that it was coming - like does it hit you full force as it's the first AF in almost a year?? xx

 

[Leinzlove]

I don't recall it. But, it probably will be a bit more painful and stick around longer. I've been reading and 80% of non BFing Mama's returns within 10 weeks with the average being 8 weeks and it can happen as early as 4 weeks. I had EWCM earlier this week so I hope thats a sign of ovulation and her arrival soon. My boobs have been a bit sore and I've had a few days here and there with some cramping also.

I couldn't imagine being an only child. Wow! Yes, DD is fine now... She still has some weight gaining issues and a speech delay. But its all normal as one of her defects was a cleft palate.

 

[Excalibur]

I don't think you are crazy at all! Tyler will be 11 weeks on Wednesday and we wanted to TTC #2 straight away as we are so broody! We have agreed on trying in December though when Tyler will be 1 year old, somehow I think we may start trying sooner

Tyler is such a laid back baby, he's been sleeping through the night from 3 weeks old, he hardly cries unless he's hungry, needs changing etc and we have always wanted babies close in age then they can grow up together

 

[Leinzlove]

EX & Babydreams: this thread is becoming a reunion! x