Anyone TTC #1 and 30 or older?

[Hollynesss]

Welcome, babylove!

Yes, it is hard to hear announcements from others. I want it to be me so badly!

 

[Babylove100]

Yep same here! I've only had one friend announce since I started ttc, of course I'm happy for them but in the background I couldn't help but wish it was me! *Sigh* Wishing us all every bit of bfp luck this month!!!!x

 

[KatO79]

Hi Hollynesss

I'm 35 and DH is 37 and we've been TTCing #1 for 11 months (or 12 cycles, on cycle #13). I tried charting for 4 months, was using the CBFM for 3 months and OPKs for the first 6-7 months but dropped it all due to the stress it was creating. So I'm going by the fact my cycles seem to be very regular (vast majority are 26 but have had a few 27 day cycles) and I O 90% of the time on CD13 (otherwise CD14). I've only had 1 chemical during my #7 cycle and no luck before or since

DH had SA and his results weren't very good: he's on the bad side of normal I've only had a Pap smear and everything's ok. We're currently waiting on a referral from our GP which he'll give us after blood tests and we've tried this cycle. So I will more than likely need IUI or maybe IVF to conceive We won't know if anything on my end is causing issues until we get that referral as the Danish GPs are pretty hands off and only can handle SA, blood work and Pap smears Here's hoping there are no serious issues on my end

Luckily most I know already have the kids they want or aren't ready to TTC because they're either single or it's way too early in their relationship so I'm free of people announcing pregnancies

 

[Praying4BB]

Welcome Kat! Hope everything turns out to be okay with you!

So I am fairly positive I am out for this cycle already. Didn't even get to test! Temp drop and yucky AF feeling started this morning and I noticed brown spotting soon after. This cycle really has me worried something is wrong. We seemed to do everything right- timing and all. Unfortunately, we can't try again until December because of DH's work schedule. I read we have to wait a year before infertility testing (which is scaring me... I feel like that is way too long for a 30+ y/o to find out what is wrong!). Does anyone have any recommendations of things we can start doing now to improve our chances in December?

 

[Hollynesss]

Welcome, Kat! I hope that you get your BFP soon before having to go the IUI/IVF route!

Praying- I'm not advocating lying....but the doctor has no idea how long you've been trying Have you looked into the SMEP plan? Pretty much you have sex every other day I think 7 days before O, then every day for 3 days right before O, then once more the day after O. I think there is a website that can explain it better, otherwise the book is free on Kindle and its really short

 

[Michellebelle]

I am curious about SMEP myself. I think if I don't get pregnant this cycle, I'll try that next cycle (as long as I can convince DH!)

 

[KatO79]

Welcome Kat! Hope everything turns out to be okay with you!

So I am fairly positive I am out for this cycle already. Didn't even get to test! Temp drop and yucky AF feeling started this morning and I noticed brown spotting soon after. This cycle really has me worried something is wrong. We seemed to do everything right- timing and all. Unfortunately, we can't try again until December because of DH's work schedule. I read we have to wait a year before infertility testing (which is scaring me... I feel like that is way too long for a 30+ y/o to find out what is wrong!). Does anyone have any recommendations of things we can start doing now to improve our chances in December?

Awww I know exacty what you mean. I'm 35 and they still make you try for a year. Here in Denmark it's you have to try a year no matter your age. It's insane that people 30 or over should have to try for so long

I know all about feeling like you've been timing things right and still no bfp But chances of pregnancy, even when you're doing everything right, is only about 20% or so.

I agree with Hollynesss, I'm not into lying myself but you could fib and tell the doctor you've been trying for longer. I unfortunately couldn't do that myself as I contacted him with a bunch of questions shortly after I dropped my p-pills so he knew how long we had been trying You don't have to say you've been trying for 1 year but you could add a 3-4 months if you're still into trying for a few more months before exploring the assisted conception route.

Yeah you could try SMEP, I tried it some months ago for 3 cycles or so but it didn't seem to work for us. Might be a bit too much for my DH when his sperm sample wasn't so good. But yeah, I think it's you start around CD8 by BDing every 2nd day and from CD10 start using OPKs. When you get a positive OPK, then you BD that day plus the next 2 days. Then 1 day break and after that one last try the day after. At least that's how I understand it.

Here's a link explaining it as well:https://spermmeetseggplan.com/

Here's a step by step plan from the website:

Cycle days 1-7
◾CD1 is your first day of full flow
◾Stock up on Ovulation Predictor Kits (OPKs)
◾Stock up on Pregnancy Tests
◾Mark start dates on your calendar: ◾CD8 = BD (“Baby Dance”/have intercourse/”try&#8221 every other day until you receive a positive OPK (+OPK)
◾CD10 daily OPK tests


Cycle day 8
◾BD, and plan to BD every other day until +OPK

Cycle day 10
◾Start daily OPK testing until OPK turns positive

+OPK day
◾BD today, tomorrow, and the next day.
◾Skip a day and BD one more time.
◾Mark test day on your calendar: +OPK day + 15 = test day
◾If OPK never turns positive, BD every other day until your period (AF or “Aunt Flo/Flow&#8221 arrives or until CD35

Test day (or CD35)
◾If AF has not arrived, take a home pregnancy test
◾First morning urine (FMU) does not always yield the best results, you may wish to try with your second morning urine (SMU) or an afternoon test after a 3-4 hour hold (no liquids)

 

[Fleur828815]

Hi everyone, can I join? I'm 32, my DH is a few years younger. We're both healthy, don't smoke, drink etc.
This is our 2nd cycle and my DH is fed up of my stressing about it ! I'm about 6 DPO and I'm getting my usual pre-menstrual symptoms so I'm probably out this month.
Many of my friends have fallen pregnant on the first try (or not even trying), and a couple of others are still struggling to conceive 2 years on, so I was hoping to be pregnant within a few cycles.

 

[Hollynesss]

Welcome, Fleur!

Quite a nice group we've assembled here!!

 

[librarianlady]

Ugh. I'm out.

AF came this morning, one day late. When she didn't show up yesterday I was starting to get my hopes up, only to have them dashed today. At least I was able to exercise some self control this cycle and not test early. Saved a test by deciding to wait until sept 5 to test. I didn't think I would be so disappointed that I'm not pregnant yet. I wanted to cry in the bathroom at work when I discovered My period had come. I can't believe how impatient I am - another month with nothing to show for it. I'm also really beginning to worry that we have real fertility problems. Can't wait for my doctor's appointment on the 17th. I feel bad for the doctor, as I am going to have a whole laundry list of things I want to talk about.

I can echo some of your feelings about jealousy. My colleague in the office next to mine is 4mo pregnant and I am just seething with envy/jealousy every time she talks about her pregnancy. They were one of those lucky couples that got pregnant their first month. Grrrrr.

I should add too, that apart from this site, no one else knows that my husband an I are actively trying for a baby. My family already bothers us endlessly about having a baby, I would hate them to know we have actually been trying. We straight up lie to them and tell them we aren't planning on having children. So you all are my virtual support group. I can't thank you enough for letting me stalk your experiences and read your ttc journals, particularly you, Hollynesss.

Anyhow, thanks for reading my bummer of a post. I promise to be more positive next time.

 

[Hollynesss]

I'm sorry the witch got you, librarian! TTC can be so emotionally difficult Every CD1 is a fresh start and a new chance to catch that eggy

 

[Allinasmile33]

Hi Everyone! I'm 33 and my husband is 37. He has two beautiful daughters from a previous marriage so this would be our first together. I completed my last pack of BC on 7/19/14 and this makes our 2nd month of TTC. I was on BC for 14 years and I'm worried that being on them for that long may be a disadvantage for us concieving soon.

 

[Fruitee]

Hi, I'm 31 and ttc my first, hd is 32, this is our fourth cycle

I am! This is our second cycle "officially" trying, I'm happy to meet others in the same situation. I've gotten a bit of a reality check these last two months, somehow I just thought I would wait until I wanted to have a baby and POOF! I would get pregnant! Never knew there could be so much involved, with the charting and temping and OPKs! SO glad there are forums like this for support.

Oh my goodness, you sound exactly like me, I just 'assumed' that it would happen straight away when I wanted it to! No such luck!! Hope you get your bfp soon

 

[Hollynesss]

Welcome Allinasmile and Fruitee!

I have friends on here that I met on the Waiting To Try forum that have gotten pregnant and given birth already. One or two cycles is all it took for them. I know it's only cycle 3 for me and still normal, but I am definitely jealous at times.

My husband pointed out that hey, at least the bd part is fun! Our time will come, girls! In the meantime, cheers to being 30, flirty, and thriving!

 

[Michellebelle]

What great positivity hollynesss! I love it!

I also think too.. So often you don't know how long it's taken other couples (except the ones that share)! I imagine there are a lot of couples out there that we are jealous of that went through months of trying themselves.

It's all about keeping trying and hopefully having some fun with it along the way.. Though it's easy to be impatient.. I know I am already!

 

[Praying4BB]

Hi, I'm 31 and ttc my first, hd is 32, this is our fourth cycle

I am! This is our second cycle "officially" trying, I'm happy to meet others in the same situation. I've gotten a bit of a reality check these last two months, somehow I just thought I would wait until I wanted to have a baby and POOF! I would get pregnant! Never knew there could be so much involved, with the charting and temping and OPKs! SO glad there are forums like this for support.

Oh my goodness, you sound exactly like me, I just 'assumed' that it would happen straight away when I wanted it to! No such luck!! Hope you get your bfp soon

Thanks Fruitee! Good luck to you too! Where are you in your cycle right now?

 

[Praying4BB]

So my BBT went back up and after about 24 hours of brown spotting, I am back to creamy CM. Monday's AF-like cramps and heaviness dissolved into lots of pressure, pinches, and pokes last night. AF should have arrived yesterday, today, or tomorrow based on my 35-37 day cycles.

I'm am really trying not to get overly excited but unless the witch shows tonight, I am going to test in the morning!

 

[Allinasmile33]

I'm 6 DPO today - not really having any symptoms. Anyone experiencing any symptoms? This month it seemed like we BD on all the days prior to my fertile window and when my fertible window showed up, we only BD the day before my fertile window started and on the 2nd day of my fertile window. I really don't expect for this to be our month. Does anyone have any advice on what the best method is, BD every other day during my fertile window or every day?

 

[Praying4BB]

I'm 6 DPO today - not really having any symptoms. Anyone experiencing any symptoms? This month it seemed like we BD on all the days prior to my fertile window and when my fertible window showed up, we only BD the day before my fertile window started and on the 2nd day of my fertile window. I really don't expect for this to be our month. Does anyone have any advice on what the best method is, BD every other day during my fertile window or every day?

Hi Allinasmile! I am 11 DPO and so far this cycle, I've primarily noticed an abnormal amount of bloating. I had some weird shooting hip pains around 7DPO and then the next day my hips were very sore. I was hoofing it around NYC both those days though, so that could easily explain it. I actually felt like AF was coming 9-10 DPO with the cramping and heaviness but that feeling went away last night and hasn't returned yet. Definitely thought I was out, but now I have a shred of hope again. One of my friends (who is preg. with #5!!) said whenever they want to have a baby, they BD every day of the cycle and have never missed! Clearly, we are not all that super-human! I think that's why we tried to do that this cycle, but poor DH was worn out by the time my positive OPKs showed and we almost missed it. So I wouldn't recommend that Some of the ladies here referred me to "SMEP" which we might try next!

 

[KatO79]

I'm 6 DPO today - not really having any symptoms. Anyone experiencing any symptoms? This month it seemed like we BD on all the days prior to my fertile window and when my fertible window showed up, we only BD the day before my fertile window started and on the 2nd day of my fertile window. I really don't expect for this to be our month. Does anyone have any advice on what the best method is, BD every other day during my fertile window or every day?

Hi Allinasmile! I am 11 DPO and so far this cycle, I've primarily noticed an abnormal amount of bloating. I had some weird shooting hip pains around 7DPO and then the next day my hips were very sore. I was hoofing it around NYC both those days though, so that could easily explain it. I actually felt like AF was coming 9-10 DPO with the cramping and heaviness but that feeling went away last night and hasn't returned yet. Definitely thought I was out, but now I have a shred of hope again. One of my friends (who is preg. with #5!!) said whenever they want to have a baby, they BD every day of the cycle and have never missed! Clearly, we are not all that super-human! I think that's why we tried to do that this cycle, but poor DH was worn out by the time my positive OPKs showed and we almost missed it. So I wouldn't recommend that Some of the ladies here referred me to "SMEP" which we might try next!

Wow yeah you could try SMEP if you don't get your bfp this time. I actually tried BDing every fertile day (from and including CD9 up to and including CD13 which is O day) 1 month and it was just too much for us. I don't want to know what it'd be like BDing every day of the month Not to mention it seems as if DHs sperm quality isn't tip top so it probably wasn't the best method for us and I got a bfn that cycle. But it's probably an ok method if your DH has normal sperm quality. But I would only take the fertile days like the 4-5 days before O day plus O day and maybe the day after.