brother in law just got married

[ginloveshemp]

We went to my husbands brother's wedding over the weekend and it was lovely, but all i could think was how pissed i'm gonna be if they get pregnant before me. they didn't seem to want to try any time soon, but that is gonna make it even worse if it happens... grrrrr...
i love them both and i'm sure they'd make lovely parents. but I WAS TRYING FIRST!!!!
Also, they're both doctors, and he made a negative comment about poor people reproducing. i was kinda pissed 'cause i'm american poor but that doesn't mean i wouldn't be a good mom. so it made me feel really ashamed for trying. (i'm working class, not on welfare or anything, but to be honest, I don't think that makes anyone a bad parent either.)

 

[wantanerd]

I have the same feeling with a friend of mine. I actually told myself as long as I get pregnant before her, I will be fine. I mainly said this because she seemed nowhere near trying either but she told me last week she was and my first thought was SHE CAN'T GET PREGNANT BEFORE ME!!!!

I think it is normal. I know she would be a good parent too but it was still hard to hear she might get pregnant before me.

 

[ginloveshemp]

oh man, if they announce that they are actually trying i'm gonna pitch a fit. but they also could just be like me and i haven't told anyone, not even my best bud. i don't know though, cause my bil seems like he has kind of a big mouth... hehehe....

 

[ceejie]

I feel the same with my husband's best friend & his wife. DH & I have been married for 2.5 years and together for six...still nothing for us. But his best friend & his wife got pg after being married for only a few months. I feel like it's petty of me, but I get so frustrated by it! I know they will be great parents, and they are so excited for their baby, but I just think why not me?!?!

 

[Dee_H]

it's understandable to be disappointed...but I think to say you will be "pissed" or "pitch a fit" ..or "I was trying first" sounds childish to me. When my brother and his gf got pregnant..I thought I wish I could be sharing news like that but never would I say things like that. Disappointment...sure..that is normal when you have been ttc for some time. You will have your day in the sun too..but I think it is awful to lose it because someone else has wonderful news about bringing a new life into this world!to you all.

 

[ginloveshemp]

it's understandable to be disappointed...but I think to say you will be "pissed" or "pitch a fit" ..or "I was trying first" sounds childish to me. When my brother and his gf got pregnant..I thought I wish I could be sharing news like that but never would I say things like that. Disappointment...sure..that is normal when you have been ttc for some time. You will have your day in the sun too..but I think it is awful to lose it because someone else has wonderful news about bringing a new life into this world!to you all.

geez, it is totally childish and petty!! i suppose i would really be happy for them, but in my head and to my husband (and to my fellow bnbers) i would totally be as childish and petty as a two year old. i would be thrilled that they would be parents cause they would be great at it and my niece would be an awesome wonderful kid that i would love to have in my life. so, hell yeah it's a terrible attitude to have and really it's not one that i do have, but when i say "pitch a fit" i actually mean cry alone.

 

[Ashlee B x]

Well to be honest, and forgive me for sounding 'childish' but my brother in law (who was just 18 at the time) got with his girlfriend around xmas 09 (same time as i stopped the pill for ttc) and by late jan early feb they tell everyone they are moving in together (shes 22 at this point) and by june announce they're pregnant, was all planned and only their first month of tryin. Now this REALLY got my back up!! Well they have their 12 weeks scan and find everything was fine, n on the mornin of their scan i discovered i was pregnant too, so when we see the scan we were happy for them n told them our news, only for a week later we lose ours n the girlfriend (at 14 weeks) says how 'fed up' of bein pregnant she is so i just snapped back 'how can you say that when your just 14 weeks, not feeling that baby move, not even showin yet, at least you still have your baby' OMG i wanted to to scream at her so much buy couldnt.
So wot im saying is, its completely normal for you to feel so much anger, or disappointment that it should be you! So many people i no have gone on to have 2nd n sum even 3rd babies in the time its takig me to conceive my second just hang in there tho, coz that will be you soon sharing your good news with everyone. GL xx