child benifits UK girls....not good news

[jenniferannex]

Hi I ve gave up reading the last few pages but just wanted to ask WHAT IS LIVING ON BENEFITS? because I work part time and goto college part time and OH works full time but we get child tax credits. Does this mean we are living off benefits? We pay school dinners, dont get uniform grants etc and yes I will be getting the sure start grant because we can and we will enjoy spending it on our 3 children.

i class living off benefits as people who CAN work but choose not to as they know they can get money off the government to live, so therefore they are not working, they are not making money for themselves, and are living off benefits.
i would no way say that you are anywhere near living off benefits, you and OH earn your own money, while getting tax credits to help you out, thats what they are there for.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Lea and MF... do you not have any special schools in your area that are specifically for children with disabilities?

He will be moving in September, so fingers crossed it works out. I will have to go with him everyday until he settles though, so my long term future is planned out in that way. If that does not work, or I am not happy (or him) then home school it is. I just think he will be one of those children that does not get on mainstream. Another issue, is that lots of SN schools do not do things like SATS, GCSES and things, he needs to do that. He is very intelligent, by home-schooling, we can still do these. I just don't know what the future holds.

Also, he has appts ALL the time, they are never on weekends. We have appointments at least once every week.

Then there is the issue that I am so emotionally drained from looking after him daily, even though he is at school in the day. It takes it out of me getting him ready and getting to school that I probably would get sacked for lack of concentration lol sorry I did add this last because this is not the reason why I do not work but it is a factor. I am literally his carer, a mum to my daughter and that is is. Im drained.

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

MF- x

 

[polo_princess]

Lea and MF... do you not have any special schools in your area that are specifically for children with disabilities?

Yep we do, but she doesn't have special-enough needs to go there It's bloody stupid!! It's a school for physical and learning disabilities. I'm not sure how much more physically disabled you can get than being paraplegic?? I know there is CP etc, but I don't get why they don't accept like Tegan. I suppose it's because SB is very uncommon too, there are only about 1500 under 16's in the UK with SB.

No way? Thats ridiculous.

In the town where i live we have your usual schooling system and then 2 other schools, one for learning disabilities and the "milder" physical disabilites (sorry, couldnt think of the right word lol) and then we have another which is specifically for children with physical disabilities.

I know there are no other schools like that in other local area's, i didnt know what it was like round where you are.

 

[indy and lara]

As I said, just being techy. I get fed up of SAHM being the world's worst job title. I love being at home and I am really pleased that I have this time with Emma. If we couldn't survive on hubby's job them my bum would be back at work.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Just want to add. My Oh does work but we do get TC if that is classed as benefit in this thread*shrug, not sure*

 

[indy and lara]

^^^ It is about time that priorities were sorted out in this country. Families with children who have ASN should have considerable more support than they have. I used to listen to so many people at work who were having to struggle so much but Local Authorities were not putting in place the relatively small amounts of money that would change their lives.

Whatever happened to the Welfare State which would support the vulnerable and needy?

 

[Tegans Mama]

Lea and MF... do you not have any special schools in your area that are specifically for children with disabilities?

Yep we do, but she doesn't have special-enough needs to go there It's bloody stupid!! It's a school for physical and learning disabilities. I'm not sure how much more physically disabled you can get than being paraplegic?? I know there is CP etc, but I don't get why they don't accept like Tegan. I suppose it's because SB is very uncommon too, there are only about 1500 under 16's in the UK with SB.

No way? Thats ridiculous.

In the town where i live we have your usual schooling system and then 2 other schools, one for learning disabilities and the "milder" physical disabilites (sorry, couldnt think of the right word lol) and then we have another which is specifically for children with physical disabilities.

I know there are no other schools like that in other local area's, i didnt know what it was like round where you are.

That is a really good system! I wish it was like that over here. We do get a "pick" which school she goes to, i.e about 5 primary schools in our area, all of which have pretty crap OFSTED reviews and are already over populated with classes of 30-40 kids and ONE teacher per class. I'm not comfortable with that at all.

I feel that we get pushed to the way side because although Tegan has very, very high physical needs, developmentally she is sound. Our OT said it's a common thing to happen. She should go to a mainstream school and hopefully have a teaching assistant or support worker full time, but I know of another kid who needs a support worker full time who has just recently been refused. I know a 15 year old with Hydrocephalus who gets headaches so severe she can't keep her eyes open if she tries to concentrate for more than 12 minutes so has 1 hour of school per day. We just don't know what will happen

MF, I'm glad you got him moved schools. Fingers crossed it works out well for you! x

 

[helen1234]

is tax credits classed as a benefit.

i get tax credits, my oh works,

i'm a sahm, does that mean i'm a bum aswell then lol

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I always feel the need to defend myself, I don't know why lol.

I know people think I exaggerate (my sister grr). My mum even admitted on Saturday, she looked after him 3 hours and she said sorry for ever thinking I over reacted!

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Lea and MF... do you not have any special schools in your area that are specifically for children with disabilities?

Yep we do, but she doesn't have special-enough needs to go there It's bloody stupid!! It's a school for physical and learning disabilities. I'm not sure how much more physically disabled you can get than being paraplegic?? I know there is CP etc, but I don't get why they don't accept like Tegan. I suppose it's because SB is very uncommon too, there are only about 1500 under 16's in the UK with SB.

No way? Thats ridiculous.

In the town where i live we have your usual schooling system and then 2 other schools, one for learning disabilities and the "milder" physical disabilites (sorry, couldnt think of the right word lol) and then we have another which is specifically for children with physical disabilities.

I know there are no other schools like that in other local area's, i didnt know what it was like round where you are.

That is a really good system! I wish it was like that over here. We do get a "pick" which school she goes to, i.e about 5 primary schools in our area, all of which have pretty crap OFSTED reviews and are already over populated with classes of 30-40 kids and ONE teacher per class. I'm not comfortable with that at all.

I feel that we get pushed to the way side because although Tegan has very, very high physical needs, developmentally she is sound. Our OT said it's a common thing to happen. She should go to a mainstream school and hopefully have a teaching assistant or support worker full time, but I know of another kid who needs a support worker full time who has just recently been refused. I know a 15 year old with Hydrocephalus who gets headaches so severe she can't keep her eyes open if she tries to concentrate for more than 12 minutes so has 1 hour of school per day. We just don't know what will happen

MF, I'm glad you got him moved schools. Fingers crossed it works out well for you! x

Thanks hun, not feeling 100% confident on the school front right now but hopefully it will be better than now, if that does not work out then im done, no more moving around, It will be home school!

I hope you sort things too x

 

[Tegans Mama]

I always feel the need to defend myself, I don't know why lol.

I know people think I exaggerate (my sister grr). My mum even admitted on Saturday, she looked after him 3 hours and she said sorry for ever thinking I over reacted!

Yep, I had EXACTLY the same thing with people saying I overreacted about Tegan. Even the smallest thing, like carrying her up the stairs, getes tedious. A child her age should be able to climb the stairs. Think of all the stuff an able bodied kid can do at 2.5 years old that makes life easier, and that is what makes MY life so hard, but my family couldn't see that. Until I left her with my Mum for six hours. She told me when I got back, that she understands now. The tiny stuff all adds up and some days I feel like a wreck!

I'm not feeling confident on the school front either hun, we are going looking at schools in the next few weeks. If the LEA refuses her a teaching assistant, we'll appeal it, but if they refuse it again, I'll be home schooling. I won't be sending her to school while they appeal it either.

 

[My_First]

only problem about all the benefit cuts in this country is its making the poor poorer and the rich dont get effected

How does that work? Please its the second time I have heard that, and I am not sure how?

well they are cutting tax credits as of march (as far as i know) which means people who work 30hours and get under a certain about in wage get them but wont so alot of people will be down by hundreds of pounds a year.

VAT has now gone on HOWEVER wages stayed the same

Same for fuel/public transport has all gone up and wages has stayed the same

Most bankers are having there yearly bonus this year and yet nurses have had to take a pay freeze, same for our troops.

They are putting up gas and electric bills and yet the pensions have been cut, they are on about cutting free bus passes for elderly which in turn will make them poorer.

They are making OAPs work longer i.e older so then there is less jobs out there for young people, and also making disabled people get back into work, so more people are going to end up on jobseekers.

They are cutting child benefits (or a benefit) for people who earn individual of £30,000 but if a household income is £60,000 then they get to keep the benefit

this country is screwed and its gotten worse in the past 12 months

With all these points:

1) I didn't understand your first point.
2) VAT is the same whether you are rich or poor
3) Same with Fuel, rich or poor
4) Same again, rich or poor, except if you earn over a certain amount you dont actually get any state pension, you have to sort out your own private one.
5) They are not MAKING Oaps work longer, they are actually scrapping retirement age so people can work longer if they wish. Just because you have a disability, it doesnt stop you doing some kind of suitable work. More people are not going to end up on JSA because they have revamped that too.
6)So most bankers work in the private sector and so they are ot Government funded. So what if they get bonuses, they are PRIVATE organisation made money. NOT funded by us. It is unfortunate that Nurses are not getting pay rises, however they work in the Government sector, funded by tax payers and so cut backs need to be made.
7) Actually its £44,000 and its per individual. So if you both earn under 44k i.e. 87k yes you will get it. However, I wouldnt consider 43k poor either...

The whole benefit system needed an overhaul. What has been proposed in theory seems a solution. Whether it will work, or not, only time will tell.

The whole rich/richer and poor/poorer debate does not work anymore. As along with all the cuts, higher rate tax papers will be taxed at 50% (was if earning over 150k, this is now 100k). Plus higher rates of NI etc etc.

 

[EternalRose]

Without sounding like Im repeating myself. I have no problem with people that can afford to stay at home, and want to be with their children.

What I DO have a problem with is people that cant afford to stay at home, but DO so without using any intitiave to bring in any funds whilst they are at home, and use the excuse 'cant afford to work' and 'waiting till my children are at school' whilst getting pregnant again and again! Stop getting pregnant then! You dont have to be arty, you can do bodyshop at home. You can actually do callcentre work from home nowadays, Avon, anything?!

 

[AP]

The thing is, i am still waiting for someone round the corner to say ' your DH works so why are you claiming DLA and such?' and ive got to remind myself, that this is because i cant work and put her in care, even though she'd havd been a few rooms away from me, they cant take the responsibility for her in case something happens.

i think thats big problem of mine though because i had always, before, prided myself on the fact id only ever had 1 week of JSA in my life and worked the day i left school.

And i struggle to this day to accept the position im in now. Its denial, it has been from the moment they told me alex had her brain haemorrage. I kept hoping that they had somehow made a mistake and her brain scans got mixed up.

When the DLA was awarded i phoned them and asked them if it was right, because i only ever expected a lower rate or nothing at all. Having these 'allowances' and 'benefits' only confirmed over and over again what happened to her.

I feel sheer guilt and i dont know why, its only when people on here like aidans mummy and tegans mama remind me that my situation is different that i can justify it.

I could never sit at home with a healthy baby and pull 'excuses' out the bag, morally it wouldnt work for me.

I feel guilt that i managed to blag the HIP grant. I wasnt entitled. I wasnt pregnant anymore when the midwife signed the form at 28 weeks. I was just jammy. it gets my goat when i see people moan about it stopping, because everyone assumes all pregnant people get it. It hasnt been the case.

The HIP grant was originally for those more than 29 weeks pregnant. Bliss, the premature baby charity, campaigned to have it lowered due to the rate of premature births growing. It was eventually lowered to 25 weeks.

However there are babies in the UK born at as little as 23 weeks who survive, but those mothers were never entitled.

Midwifes can be slow handing the HIP form our,like in my case, where i didnt get it til 28 weeks gestation. By that time Alex was no longer in my womb, but in an incubator, and in the eyes of the government, i was no longer pregnant so no longer entitled.( I only managed to blag it because i was quick off the mark to send it before child benefit, so they didnt realise she was here.)

Add that to the 3 months of lost earnings due to having to take mat leave early, expenses to see your own baby in hospital, and thats pretty unfair. Full term mums were almost awarded for going all the way, ykwim?

So moaning about it just enrages me. Its been unfair the whole time , not just now, most lucky mums have been given it without a second thought.

 

[Tegans Mama]

The thing is, i am still waiting for someone round the corner to say ' your DH works so why are you claiming DLA and such?' and ive got to remind myself, that this is because i cant work and put her in care, even though she'd havd been a few rooms away from me, they cant take the responsibility for her in case something happens.

i think thats big problem of mine though because i had always, before, prided myself on the fact id only ever had 1 week of JSA in my life and worked the day i left school.

And i struggle to this day to accept the position im in now. Its denial, it has been from the moment they told me alex had her brain haemorrage. I kept hoping that they had somehow made a mistake and her brain scans got mixed up.

When the DLA was awarded i phoned them and asked them if it was right, because i only ever expected a lower rate or nothing at all. Having these 'allowances' and 'benefits' only confirmed over and over again what happened to her.

I feel sheer guilt and i dont know why, its only when people on here like aidans mummy and tegans mama remind me that my situation is different that i can justify it.

I could never sit at home with a healthy baby and pull 'excuses' out the bag, morally it wouldnt work for me.

I feel guilt that i managed to blag the HIP grant. I wasnt entitled. I wasnt pregnant anymore when the midwife signed the form at 28 weeks. I was just jammy. it gets my goat when i see people moan about it stopping, because everyone assumes all pregnant people get it. It hasnt been the case.

The HIP grant was originally for those more than 29 weeks pregnant. Bliss, the premature baby charity, campaigned to have it lowered due to the rate of premature births growing. It was eventually lowered to 25 weeks.

However there are babies in the UK born at as little as 23 weeks who survive, but those mothers were never entitled.

Midwifes can be slow handing the HIP form our,like in my case, where i didnt get it til 28 weeks gestation. By that time Alex was no longer in my womb, but in an incubator, and in the eyes of the government, i was no longer pregnant so no longer entitled.( I only managed to blag it because i was quick off the mark to send it before child benefit, so they didnt realise she was here.)

Add that to the 3 months of lost earnings due to having to take mat leave early, expenses to see your own baby in hospital, and thats pretty unfair. Full term mums were almost awarded for going all the way, ykwim?

So moaning about it just enrages me. Its been unfair the whole time , not just now, most lucky mums have been given it without a second thought.

Sandi hun, if Alex was healthy, things would be different. The way I look at it, we get DLA because Tegan costs more to "keep", simple as that!! We'll be getting the mobility component awarded in August, and will be getting a mobility car with it, because I can only just afford to drive a Micra and there is NO way I will fit her wheelchair in the boot. We need a bigger car. TBH, her wheelchair is probably going to end up strapped onto the backseat for the time being, which makes me bloody angry but such is life!

I also would not be at home if Tegan was healthy. Oh, how I wish she was. She's not though, never will be, and she's not just gonna turn healthy aged 18 either unfortunately We were told when she was born, her long term outlook won't change, and I fully expect her to live at home for her whole life.

 

[helen1234]

The thing is, i am still waiting for someone round the corner to say ' your DH works so why are you claiming DLA and such?' and ive got to remind myself, that this is because i cant work and put her in care, even though she'd havd been a few rooms away from me, they cant take the responsibility for her in case something happens.

i think thats big problem of mine though because i had always, before, prided myself on the fact id only ever had 1 week of JSA in my life and worked the day i left school.

And i struggle to this day to accept the position im in now. Its denial, it has been from the moment they told me alex had her brain haemorrage. I kept hoping that they had somehow made a mistake and her brain scans got mixed up.

When the DLA was awarded i phoned them and asked them if it was right, because i only ever expected a lower rate or nothing at all. Having these 'allowances' and 'benefits' only confirmed over and over again what happened to her.

I feel sheer guilt and i dont know why, its only when people on here like aidans mummy and tegans mama remind me that my situation is different that i can justify it.

I could never sit at home with a healthy baby and pull 'excuses' out the bag, morally it wouldnt work for me.

I feel guilt that i managed to blag the HIP grant. I wasnt entitled. I wasnt pregnant anymore when the midwife signed the form at 28 weeks. I was just jammy. it gets my goat when i see people moan about it stopping, because everyone assumes all pregnant people get it. It hasnt been the case.

The HIP grant was originally for those more than 29 weeks pregnant. Bliss, the premature baby charity, campaigned to have it lowered due to the rate of premature births growing. It was eventually lowered to 25 weeks.

However there are babies in the UK born at as little as 23 weeks who survive, but those mothers were never entitled.

Midwifes can be slow handing the HIP form our,like in my case, where i didnt get it til 28 weeks gestation. By that time Alex was no longer in my womb, but in an incubator, and in the eyes of the government, i was no longer pregnant so no longer entitled.( I only managed to blag it because i was quick off the mark to send it before child benefit, so they didnt realise she was here.)

Add that to the 3 months of lost earnings due to having to take mat leave early, expenses to see your own baby in hospital, and thats pretty unfair. Full term mums were almost awarded for going all the way, ykwim?

So moaning about it just enrages me. Its been unfair the whole time , not just now, most lucky mums have been given it without a second thought.

i'd go beserk at anybody who questioned me getting dla, and i get carers allowance and our tax credits are higher cos we get these you know what i really couldnt give a hoot what people think, cos they dont dish it out like sweeties, dla has to be approved by two medical proffessionals, you dont just ring up and get it, and anybody who fakes a childs illness to get that kind of thing will be found out in the end and strung up in court for fraudulant claim.

so i've learnt to become thick skinned over the last 14 yrs since my daughter was diagnosed with her illness its tough enough without that shit.

you were totally in your rights to get your hip grant.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Oh its so hard! Hugs xx I hate people telling me things are "not fair" for what we get. I would personally give them the DLA I receive every week out of my own pocket if I could have my child without disibilitys.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

The thing is, i am still waiting for someone round the corner to say ' your DH works so why are you claiming DLA and such?' and ive got to remind myself, that this is because i cant work and put her in care, even though she'd havd been a few rooms away from me, they cant take the responsibility for her in case something happens.

i think thats big problem of mine though because i had always, before, prided myself on the fact id only ever had 1 week of JSA in my life and worked the day i left school.

And i struggle to this day to accept the position im in now. Its denial, it has been from the moment they told me alex had her brain haemorrage. I kept hoping that they had somehow made a mistake and her brain scans got mixed up.

When the DLA was awarded i phoned them and asked them if it was right, because i only ever expected a lower rate or nothing at all. Having these 'allowances' and 'benefits' only confirmed over and over again what happened to her.

I feel sheer guilt and i dont know why, its only when people on here like aidans mummy and tegans mama remind me that my situation is different that i can justify it.

I could never sit at home with a healthy baby and pull 'excuses' out the bag, morally it wouldnt work for me.

I feel guilt that i managed to blag the HIP grant. I wasnt entitled. I wasnt pregnant anymore when the midwife signed the form at 28 weeks. I was just jammy. it gets my goat when i see people moan about it stopping, because everyone assumes all pregnant people get it. It hasnt been the case.

The HIP grant was originally for those more than 29 weeks pregnant. Bliss, the premature baby charity, campaigned to have it lowered due to the rate of premature births growing. It was eventually lowered to 25 weeks.

However there are babies in the UK born at as little as 23 weeks who survive, but those mothers were never entitled.

Midwifes can be slow handing the HIP form our,like in my case, where i didnt get it til 28 weeks gestation. By that time Alex was no longer in my womb, but in an incubator, and in the eyes of the government, i was no longer pregnant so no longer entitled.( I only managed to blag it because i was quick off the mark to send it before child benefit, so they didnt realise she was here.)

Add that to the 3 months of lost earnings due to having to take mat leave early, expenses to see your own baby in hospital, and thats pretty unfair. Full term mums were almost awarded for going all the way, ykwim?

So moaning about it just enrages me. Its been unfair the whole time , not just now, most lucky mums have been given it without a second thought.

i'd go beserk at anybody who questioned me getting dla, and i get carers allowance and our tax credits are higher cos we get these you know what i really couldnt give a hoot what people think, cos they dont dish it out like sweeties, dla has to be approved by two medical proffessionals, you dont just ring up and get it, and anybody who fakes a childs illness to get that kind of thing will be found out in the end and strung up in court for fraudulant claim.

so i've learnt to become thick skinned over the last 14 yrs since my daughter was diagnosed with her illness its tough enough without that shit.

you were totally in your rights to get your hip grant.

Honest, It took 23 weeks to get my sons DLA, So many people had to be involved, but I must admit, sometimes if people question it, or even silly remarks, I go home and cry. I did earlier when my sister said something stupid I wish it didn't get to me. But it does.

 

[Tegans Mama]

Honest, It took 23 weeks to get my sons DLA, So many people had to be involved, but I must admit, sometimes if people question it, or even silly remarks, I go home and cry. I did earlier when my sister said something stupid I wish it didn't get to me. But it does.

I think it took about 3 months for Tegan's, but we applied for it when she was 3 months old and had been out of hospital 3 weeks. I added about 6-7 pages to the form with all of her doctors etc.
She was far healthier then than she is now.

My own Auntie has a habit of comparing her 22 month old son to Tegan. "x has been walking 8 months, how is Tegan comign along?" "we're starting potty training soon, how about you?" She'll never be potty trained and never walk so stfu!