{CLOSED GROUP} Journey to BFP and Beyond!

[KTJ006]

That's a tough one, T. I'm an advocate of letting your body heal. You just birthed a baby, which is huge and amazing and stressful. Your body does need time to heal and get back to normal. Your uterus and other parts of your body had to compensate and move around to make room for Selah. They don't return to their normal size and location immediately. I'd be afraid of getting pregnant, then another loss happening because my body just wasn't healed or ready to support another pregnancy. Everyone has a different viewpoint, but that's where my head would be. Just go with your gut.

So far this trip has been exhausting. The people above us in the hotel must weigh 1,000lbs, because you hear everything they do. Until 1am in the morning and then again at 6am. I'm exhausted. Hopefully i can sneak in a nap!

 

[tcinks]

Thanks for the replies. My husband and I will keep discussing and praying and see what we decide.

Katie, that must be so annoying! Do you guys have plans to do anything specific for the trip, or were you just looking for a getaway?

Dh and I might take a little trip this week, he took off work. We mostly will do things around the house, but maybe will take two days to go somewhere, maybe St Louis.

Hope everyone is having a good weekend!!

 

[zaycain]

T - My thoughts are based on assumption cause I've never been in your situation. With early miscarriage I can understand starting right away, but I would be hesitant to start after giving birth. I would think the body would need to heal. I agree with Katie, I wouldn't want to be worried about the next pregnancy more than you already will be.

With this being said, you know your body best.

 

[coucou11]

Terrissa, I think I agree that waiting one cycle probably makes the most sense. I don't think you need to wait four (that seems like such a random number to me), but one would at least give your uterus time to recover from the birth. But, as everyone has said, you definitely know your body best! I am sure there are women who have gotten pregnant right away and everything has been fine. Could be worth doing some research on and seeing if there are any statistics or experiences with this kind of thing out there. I'm honestly not even sure what the uterine recovery from birth entails, so knowing that might give you some ideas about whether waiting is important or not. How does DH feel?

Zay, how are you feeling? You have a scan coming up this week, right?

Katie, ugh! I hope those people move out of the hotel soon, what a drag.

AFM, I have my HSG tomorrow. I'm a little nervous, but at least things are happening. Hubby still has to schedule his SA, which will probably end up being next week with his work schedule. I'm slightly concerned that if we get pregnant this cycle then find out it is a problem with his sperm, we will have another miscarriage. I'm definitely concerned about his sperm now, having read more about propecia. What a drag if all of this could have been prevented if he had just stopped that stupid medication sooner. Sigh. Anyway, will try to stay positive. Had my thyroid and pro lactic blood draw this morning - holy cow, that was intense. I think she took ten vials!! Also, I forgot to fast - has anyone done prolactin testing and if so, did it matter if you were fasting or not? Now that I have this second opinion doctor I'm second guessing everything about my OB.

Will keep you all updated

 

[tcinks]

Leigh, good luck with the hsg! I think it's good you're seeing a different doctor for a second opinion . I don't know much about those tests, sorry I can't offer any help on that.

I have decided I will wait at least one cycle. I don't want to, obviously, but I think it will be best. Although I do feel a lot better than I did after I lost Ronen, I know in don't feel 100% like myself. And I also want to talk to a new doctor and get another opinion. I found an office that seems to be more preventive care and natural methods (like herbs and teas and other things) than my previous office. Not that I think with my particular case that herbs will help, but I like doctors that are open to different ways of thinking that just traditional medicine. Anyway, hopefully I can get in with one of those doctors in the next couple of weeks and come up with a plan for our next pregnancy. They also have midwives there who handle high risk pregnancies, and I'd so love that. But I know I'll probably need a doctor, especially if I end up needing the cerclage.

I just have no idea what to do with my time. If I start a job or start taking classes, then get pregnant again in a couple of months, I'd probably not be able to stay with it for too long. I will start the volunteering at the pregnancy clinic soon, so I'm looking forward to that. But it's only a few hours a week. Hmmm.

 

[KTJ006]

T- go to Meetup.com and check it out. It's a place where you can find groups of people who like to do things you like in your area. I'm part of a Moms group and a hiking group. Have met some fabulous people there and there's always events going on for me to go to. Might be worth a try.

Leigh - keep us posted with all the testing! Excited things are moving forward for you guys!!

I find out tomorrow what time my surgery is on the 29th. I'm so scared and excited! Scared they'll find something and scared they won't find anything. Does that make sense?

Boston was fun but only 3 hours of sleep the entire weekend. No joke. I came back and slept from 6:30p until 7:40a. Thank goodness for an awesome DH who has no problem taking care of the kids.

My oldest is sick so today will be a chill day. Hope all you ladies are well!!

 

[NDH]

Good luck Leigh and Katie and Terrissa

I got the official go ahead today to get chickens and build my raised gardens so I'm now trying to do as much as I can while I'm still able as I'm getting sicker with every day. Hoping it won't get too much worse but I know I still have it pretty easy

 

[jlw617]

Leigh-sorry, I can't offer any advice on either type of testing regarding the blood/hsg, I know you might be upset if you find out how easily you could have prevented the losses you had but you can't think that way. If you didnt know, you didn't know and in a way it would be bitter sweet, bitter because of your losses but sweet because now you know and it would bring a new hope. Either way I hope you get answers!

Terissa-you have to do what you feel is best, I'm glad you're coping and looking to keep busy, that is a great idea, if you get a job and have to leave shortly after, that will be ok too.

Katie-3 hours of sleep!!!! I couldn't handle it! Glad you had fun though-did you get to do anything really exciting or was it just overall a good time? Sorry your oldest is sick but yes it is great to have a hubby that's willing to step up, mine is very sweet like that too

Natalie-I think you're crazy to take on the chickens and build your raised garden beds to me the first tri is probably the worst with being so sick, I didn't want to do anything this time until maybe around 15 weeks. I hope you have fun with it though

I'm feeling pretty good these days, my oldest has been able to feel Charlie kick which has been really neat for both of us. She is at jr camp right now with our church so it has been pretty quiet since yesterday. I'm hoping to get the nursery started this week, other than that, nothing new here.

 

[KTJ006]

OooOoo chickens!!! That is so exciting!! We have friends who have them and my oldest loves to feed them chickweed. Natalie - I forget - have you been to the doctor/specialist/midwife/whoever you typically see yet? I guess it's a good sign that you're starting to feel yucky...pregnancy symptoms!

Jamie - so the first night I didn't sleep because of the loud people above us. That was the 3 hour sleep. I probably should have called the front desk but I didn't. I don't know why. I was too tired. LoL. The second night we didn't stay in the best hotel. It got 4.5 stars (out of 5), but our room was just horrible. The bathroom was not cleaned at all...I'll spare everyone the details. And I had to share a full size bed with my sister who talks in her sleep. That would be why I didn't get a wink of sleep that night. It was a great trip besides that - my sweet cousin got married and we got to see all of our family. We're originally from CT with family all in the Boston area, so it was like going home! I only wish we could have spent more time with everyone. Glad to be back though in my nice, comfy bed!

 

[coucou11]

Thanks all for the support! I just got back from my HSG. The procedure was super easy - no cramping, it took hardly any time at all. The one annoying thing was that the tech basically told me that the procedure is really for checking your tubes, not for looking for scar tissue in the uterus. Umm... that is why I was getting the procedure, hello!? He showed me the scan and said my tubes looked fine and as far as he could tell, the uterus looked good, he didn't see any places where the dye was not flowing properly (which would indicate scarring, fibroids, etc). I'm sure my OB will say everything was fine. The fertility specialist wants to see the cd as well and look at the pics herself, and hopefully she will be able to see what she needs to see in order to make a determination. I'm just hopeful that this at least means the scarring is not severe, and that hopefully I can get pregnant even with the scarring (if there is any).

Hubby goes in for the SA tomorrow - looking online it seems like results take 3-5 days. I'm very curious as to how these results will be. For some reason I'm more and more convinced it is his sperm, I don't know why.

 

[kdmalk]

Stupid thing just gave me a pop up and deleted my message! I'll chat more later. Here is baby!!!!

 

[jlw617]

Katie, that sounds awful, I'm too stubborn and would have demanded the hotel give me a different room sounds like a lot of fun though despite the lack of sleep hehe.

Leigh-I'm sure you were atleast relieved to hear that thus far it looks like everything is ok on your end. As far as the SA is concerned I know I mentioned this before and I have a somewhat different situation then the rest of the ladies on here but since DH had a reversal we did the SA ourselves we did it for multiple reasons, first it saved us money and we got results ummm instantly, as well as being able to test whenever we wanted which was good because if DH started supplementing with something or changed his diet or whatever we could see if there was a difference, also lab results can be rather inaccurate because if the tech doesn't look at it right away, there are several factors that can effect the analysis...just my 2 cents also if it is his and it's something like a low count or motility issues (something that can possible be improved) I highly reccomend him taking fertilaid, we really think it made a big difference and this is something that is very common for men who just had a reversal so it's something we are "experienced" in. We not only noticed a difference in his swimmers but he felt so good on them that he continues to take them as a multivitamin.

 

[jlw617]

What Kylee??!!!! Congrats!!!!!! Super excited for you, but I would have giggled a little if you were having a girl

 

[coucou11]

Congrats Kylee!!

 

[coucou11]

Jamie you are so bold testing sperm yourself! If we end up having a problem in that area maybe I will go that route, to avoid the continued cost of it. I think propecia can cause problems with the head of the sperm, can you see that kind of thing when you test of your own? Definitely if there is a problem with his sperm I will be ordering something like fertilaid or festilsan-M. He was skeptical before but I imagine this will get him on board.

I had a follow up with the fertility doc this morning. I am really concerned she is not going to be able to tell anything from the HSG and try to make me retake it and her clinic (where I have to pay out of pocket). She did another ultrasound and she keeps telling me that she can see something on my uterus (a black spot on my lining at one end of the uterus, she points it out and I can see it too), but she doesn't know what it is. It's very frustrating because it's so uncertain.

She also said that I have a good follicle and will ovulate on the left side, and that she thinks it should happen this weekend. However, I told her I always ovulate on CD16, which is not until next Wednesday. Because of this, she thinks I might be ovulating post-mature eggs, and she wants to see me again Monday morning, where, if I haven't ovulated, she says she might trigger it.

I really want the results of my tests, everything feels so uncertain until we can rule out a few things.

 

[tcinks]

Oh Leigh that is so frustrating. :/ Are you still going to try this cycle despite the unknowns?

 

[jlw617]

Jamie you are so bold testing sperm yourself! If we end up having a problem in that area maybe I will go that route, to avoid the continued cost of it. I think propecia can cause problems with the head of the sperm, can you see that kind of thing when you test of your own? Definitely if there is a problem with his sperm I will be ordering something like fertilaid or festilsan-M. He was skeptical before but I imagine this will get him on board.

I had a follow up with the fertility doc this morning. I am really concerned she is not going to be able to tell anything from the HSG and try to make me retake it and her clinic (where I have to pay out of pocket). She did another ultrasound and she keeps telling me that she can see something on my uterus (a black spot on my lining at one end of the uterus, she points it out and I can see it too), but she doesn't know what it is. It's very frustrating because it's so uncertain.

She also said that I have a good follicle and will ovulate on the left side, and that she thinks it should happen this weekend. However, I told her I always ovulate on CD16, which is not until next Wednesday. Because of this, she thinks I might be ovulating post-mature eggs, and she wants to see me again Monday morning, where, if I haven't ovulated, she says she might trigger it.

I really want the results of my tests, everything feels so uncertain until we can rule out a few things.

Is she just saying she thinks you ovulate post mature eggs based on what day you ovulate? If so that's kind of strange, I'm pretty sure I ovulated on cd16 this last time...are you doubting her at all with her not being able to tell you what's on your uterus? I know I might be or is there a reason she can't tell?

Yep you can totally see everything and we paid maybe $50-$60 for a nicer kids microscope ha! It does take practice and to be honest my DH was the one that would find them under the right magnification every time because when I tried I couldn't do it, but we could see the ones that were deformed(head or missing a tail) or stuck together or the ones that would just swim in circles over and over-to be honest it was kind of neat to see and I know this might sound funny but once a man sees his swimmers, most men think it's one of the coolest things ever

 

[NDH]

I've gone to reply a few times but my phone keeps being finicky and the replies don't post. so apologies for glossing over stuff I can't remember what I was saying that didn't get posted.

Kylee Congrats on your boy! Does that mean Selah was the only girl in the group? Zay will you be finding out? I won't know before March, but all wives tales are pointing to girl so I'm guessing its a boy based on everything pointing boy with my girls

Leigh that sounds frustrating that she can see something but doesn't know what. self sperm analysis sounds really interesting Jamie, I never would have thought of doing that. for some reason I thought you meant you used those home testing kits not a microscope.

 

[jlw617]

Leigh that sounds frustrating that she can see something but doesn't know what. self sperm analysis sounds really interesting Jamie, I never would have thought of doing that. for some reason I thought you meant you used those home testing kits not a microscope.

haha nope, just stuck the "sample" in a petri dish minus the lid, we found that using a slide kind of smashed them lol, and then watch them go, theres different formulas online for calculating

 

[coucou11]

T - yes, we will still try this cycle. Who knows, it might all work out! And plus, since I just had the HSG, and everyone says anecdotally its easier to get pregnant after one of those, I want to take the opportunity. How are you doing these days? I had my miscarriage support group last night and was thinking of you, hoping you are getting support and love.

Jamie - I think she is determining when I should ovulate based on the size of my follicle. On the ultrasound she measured it and that's when she said oh you should ovulate this weekend. I'm not sure there would be another way to tell - I agree, I don't think it would be right to just go by the cycle day. I am slightly skeptical of her, but she is at least pointing out the spots that she sees, so I know she's not totally making it up. I just feel like, if nothing shows up on the HSG, and my doctor didn't see anything, then it can't be that big a deal, right? That sperm analysis sounds totally hilarious, and useful! I'll see if I can get my hubby to sign on if we need it.

Nat - totally, very frustrating. My hope is just that whatever it is, it is so small that it ends up not interfering with a pregnancy. I feel like, if I was aiming to have 5 kids, I would be more concerned. But I just need one good egg, and one good sperm, and one good implantation. Is that so much to ask!?

Zay, did you have your scan this week? Let us know how it went!!

Kylee, did you tell your family yet about the boy?

Kate - wow, your procedure it coming up! Is it a hysteroscopy, I can't remember now. Let us know how it goes - that might be my next step, if we can't get pregnant and still can't figure out what is wrong.

Fleur - how are you? It's been a long time, I hope everything is ok.