[CLOSED GROUP] Trick or treat, Baby feet, Give me some chubby cheeks to eat

[VivianJean]

Honey, it's totally understandable that you are having issues managing your feelings towards him right now. No judging in this corner at all. Have you guys talked at all? Maybe you need to see a counselor? Sort through and legitimize what you are feeling in a safe environment...

 

[brunettebimbo]

No judging here either. I guess it's only natural to feel that way. Growing up we are told about safe sex etc and how you'll get pregnant by just looking at a guy but in reality TTC can be a hell of a lot harder and in yours and your OH case even more so.

I know it's not the same but about 6 months into mine and my husbands relationship he told me he didn't want more kids (he had 2 already to a woman he hardly knew. Neither planned) so I left him. We split for about 6 weeks. He came back and said that losing me just showed him how much he wanted to be with me and build a family etc. We've now been together 7 years and he was first to suggest TTC#2!

Basically what I'm trying to say is that even though there are some hurdles that you will have to jump to get your baby you will get there in the end and I do believe that you and your OH will be a lot stronger together for it.

Hope you feel better soon.

 

[CantHrdlyWait]

Amanda- no judging at all. I think I would feel the same way. It'd be hard not too. I can't even imagine what you're going through. *hugs*

 

[frsttimemama]

Amanda, I am so sorry you feel that way. It's totally understandable. I'm on the other end , afraid my hubby will feel that way toward me, even though he denies it.

On that note, my progesterone was 0.3 yesterday. I'm not shocked. I have an OPK that looks positive to me today. We did not BD last night. Hopefully tonight. Temp dropped from yesterday so we will see.

 

[goldstns]

Nikki were you just bleeding or also crampy with your IB?

Just the one time wipe of brown CM/blood (and I ran to my co-worker asking for a tampon). I can't remember if I was crampy or it was in my head that AF started. I def thought it was AF because I wore tampons for like 2 days until I realized there was NOTHING on the tampons so I stopped wearing them and tested. So I might have had cramps, but it also might have been in my head. I believe feeling crampy could be either AF or IB for the egg implanting.

DID YOU TEST?

 

[HWPG]

amanda, these are totally normal feelings. when i was where you are, my problem was not attraction, but more like denial. i just thought, "it cant be true, ergo i should be pregnant" - and every month, i cried and cried because a miracle didnt happen. also, i thought, if i prayed enough, went to church enough, joined a bible group, etc etc just HAD MORE FAITH, it would happen. miraculously. i am not trying to say you should or should not rely on your belief system right now - i'm just saying that we do and think irrational things. things that normally wouldnt cross our minds. even now, i find myself thinking "i wonder if i could make a baby with that man" - in NO WAY wanting to be with that guy, but knowing he has 2034893 children already. or i think, 'i'll just have my sister have a baby for me".
ok, sorry, i'm rambling.... but i'm trying to say that 1) this is normal and 2) you should talk to someone about it (sounds like you are). and i know this sounds bad, but you should make yourself do sexy things with your man, because intimacy is a HUGE part of relationships. it doesnt have to be sex, per se, but maybe only wear underwear to bed, or maybe join him in the shower, or something that your mind may say "no" to, but when you do it, each step moves you closer back together.
alright, at this point, maybe i've said too much. please let me know if i've overstepped. BIG hugs. BIG.

 

[Cowgirl07]

Amanda-Those feelings are normal, I know you guys can get through it!
Morgan-what a touching story, made me cry.
Sonia-I hope you come back soon.
AFM: My temp dipped today at 4 dpo-I hate temping it is driving me bonkers. On other news our new laptop is being picked up tomorrow.

 

[VivianJean]

amanda, these are totally normal feelings. when i was where you are, my problem was not attraction, but more like denial. i just thought, "it cant be true, ergo i should be pregnant" - and every month, i cried and cried because a miracle didnt happen. also, i thought, if i prayed enough, went to church enough, joined a bible group, etc etc just HAD MORE FAITH, it would happen. miraculously. i am not trying to say you should or should not rely on your belief system right now - i'm just saying that we do and think irrational things. things that normally wouldnt cross our minds. even now, i find myself thinking "i wonder if i could make a baby with that man" - in NO WAY wanting to be with that guy, but knowing he has 2034893 children already. or i think, 'i'll just have my sister have a baby for me".
ok, sorry, i'm rambling.... but i'm trying to say that 1) this is normal and 2) you should talk to someone about it (sounds like you are). and i know this sounds bad, but you should make yourself do sexy things with your man, because intimacy is a HUGE part of relationships. it doesnt have to be sex, per se, but maybe only wear underwear to bed, or maybe join him in the shower, or something that your mind may say "no" to, but when you do it, each step moves you closer back together.
alright, at this point, maybe i've said too much. please let me know if i've overstepped. BIG hugs. BIG.

FWIW - I do agree with reminding yourself what it feels like to be attracted to someone even if you are going through a period of not feeling that way. DH and I went through that - didnt have sex for ages... like months and we almost separated. We were fighting over my career and this horrible house that we bought and ended up being a money-pit. The last thing I wanted to do was have sex or feel sexy with him. I was so mad and frustrated nothing about him was a turn on. We almost divorced. Before we did we decided to try to re-create how we used to be. It was awkward at first but it helped a lot in reminding us why we were together in the first place.

 

[Lotalaughs16]

I'm so sorry you're feeling this way Amanda, I think the ladies here have already said it very well...those feelings are OK and normal, and you are not going to jump over this hurdle in 1 day...it takes time and effort from both of you to get back to a place of acceptance and then you move forward...small steps. we're all here for you

 

[frsttimemama]

Refresh my memory please.. positive opk today means I should O within the next like 12-36 hours, correct? Just tryin to be sure I have it right.

 

[Lotalaughs16]

Thats what the directions on my OPKs say...good luck!!

 

[frsttimemama]

Thanks!! I threw them away like a dummy. Lol

 

[RobertRedford]

thanks ladies. Today is a new today, hopefully a much better one!

Happy friday!

 

[VivianJean]

Nikki were you just bleeding or also crampy with your IB?

Just the one time wipe of brown CM/blood (and I ran to my co-worker asking for a tampon). I can't remember if I was crampy or it was in my head that AF started. I def thought it was AF because I wore tampons for like 2 days until I realized there was NOTHING on the tampons so I stopped wearing them and tested. So I might have had cramps, but it also might have been in my head. I believe feeling crampy could be either AF or IB for the egg implanting.

DID YOU TEST?

Yeah, that makes sense. Temp was down a little today - if it's down tomorrow then this was all AF created.

Did test but -ive. But I might be day 10 or 11dpo because FF has me at 10 and OPKs/symptoms have me at 11. The only good thing to come of this is that today is CD 29 and last month I had AF already, but this month with a later ovulation it has been a test to see what my luteal phase would do and whether it was somewhat stable at 13 days. So I'll either be getting AF in 2-3 days or a BFP. I've decided I'm not going to check CM any more today. I'm freaking out and doing exactly what the doc told me not to do.

Was up late helping DH write his cover letter and update his resume. I was an english major, he is ESL and boy can you tell. hahaha.

Sent in his official application to SpaceX an hour ago. I'm hoping and praying that they call him into interview because that kid can sell ice to eskimos.

A job for DH in LA (meaning I could keep this job that I LOVE) and a bfp... wouldn't that just be a happy thanksgiving?

 

[NDTaber9211]

Yeah u usually ovulate 12-36 hours after pos opk. Good luck!

Amanda- I can't imagine how you are feeling. Absolutely no judgment here. What's happening with you is what I'm afraid of if I can't have baby. I agree with what the other ladies have said. Try to recreate things that made you guys fall in love in the first place. Maybe make an appointment with a counselor. I hope you 2 work everything out.

Julie posted her pregnancy reveal photo on fb today . I couldn't help but feel smug like 'awww yeah, I knew this before all of you'

I had what in hoping was a fall back rise this morning. I'm going to temp for a few more days and then stop. Put my first progesterone suppository in. This is pretty weird. Definitely need to stock up on panty liners.

 

[frsttimemama]

FX for you Nichole!!

 

[frsttimemama]

I put all of my OPKS together and have 2 about the same.. 930,last night and 1030 this morning. Can't decide.. gonna BD tonight just to be safe. Wish we had last night. I was pretty upset about that. It's dumb. I should have just said positive opk.. ( even if I was not sure ) but I don't want to stress him. This TTC is making me crazy. I just hate it. I should have a 4 month old today, not starting back at square one. Okay body, you had a break. Time to make a little brother or sister for our little guy! Get with the program.

 

[NDTaber9211]

Can you take a pic of the opks?

 

[jury3]

Nikki were you just bleeding or also crampy with your IB?

I didn't notice any bleeding, but I was really crampy around implantation...for about 3 days. Had some lower back pain that only happens during AF. Cramping went away and then came back around AF time. It was never as bad as AF cramps though.

Amanda-I'm sorry you're going through that...it does sound normal though. I agree with what the other girls have said, talk to someone...don't let it keep building. There are options out there! There are lots of women on my at-home insemination group that are married but DH can't get them preggo. So, they are using donor sperm. There are ways you guys can have babies together, don't forget that

Nichole-Lol Seriously, you girls were the first to know! You knew before DW even!

Had our 12 week apt today. Baby A's hb was 164 and Baby B's was 152...things look good

 

[frsttimemama]

Okay, bottom to top starting last night. 5:30 p, 7:30 p, 9:30 p, 4 a, 6:30 a, & 10:30 a .. opinions? Can I quit peeing on sticks yet?