Considering at-home insemination with donor sperm...?

[Pinkorblue11]

Well, Lian, there is something to be said about gut feelings and from what I've read when it comes to donors, it's best to go with those feelings. No matter how nice the person is, something is trying to protect you. Also, who knows...maybe this coming cycle will be the one that works, especially since everything is fine with you and the donor. If you do decide to go with another donor at some point, you won't have any doubt when you find the right one.

 

[c.30]

Hi Lian, I'd agree with Pinkorblue; I think its very important when choosing a donor to go with your gut instincts...'something' is telling you that this one doesn't feel right and I would be inclined to trust that.

Really hope its going to be your time VERY soon, FX and for this cycle

 

[c.30]

E-mailed my donor this morning and just got a reply saying he wasn't happy to carry on because he didn't feel a connection with me. Was GUTTED at first because I now have to go through the process of finding someone new

I guess a part of me isn't totally sorry because on thinking about it, he did stay a bit longer than I had wanted and expected and for various other reasons....I'm on CD3 now so I have at least 7 days (until I start OPK testing!!) to find, talk and be comfortable with someone, is that even possible????

 

[c.30]

Wish he'd let me know a bit flipping sooner, grrrr!!!!!!

 

[lian_83]

Pink, C30 -- You're both correct. I am just probably too depressed with what happened last cycle, cause I thought we surely got that egg. But yeah try for another cycle.

C.30 -- that sucks!! I think u can still find a new donor. Because actually, I just posted an ad 3 days ago, and 3 potential donors have contacted me, 1 is very shady, but 2 are quite serious about it and very decent. And to think I live in like a very small city, I'm sure you can find someone.

 

[RubyRainbows]

lian -- I would def listen to that little voice trying to tell you something! It is so important to go with your gut feeling & intuition!

We have used 3 different known donors... and 2 different frozen donors... each time we switched donors i kept thinking how enormous of a decision we were making...... bc by switching donors it meant a totally different baby would be created! This thought drove me nuts until i just said..... in the end the baby we are meant to have will come into our lives.

Sometimes it takes awhile to catch that eggy! If the tests show you & your previous donor are both fine..... it will happen..... and it will happen when it's meant to.

c.30 -- I hate that your donor did that!!!!!!! Is this his 1st time being a donor?? Maybe he just chickened out but didn't want to admit that. Are you looking for a donor to co-parent?? If you wont have future involvement together anyhow, i don't see why a "connection" was so important to him?! I think being nice, friendly, cordial to each other... and feeling safe... are the only important factors. Do you think maybe he was expecting NI? I know alot of donors once talking with them for awhile... tried to suggest NI rather than AI. Do you think maybe this guy's expectations were off?

Sorry this happened! I hope you find a new donor ASAP!

 

[c.30]

Lian, it really does suck but thank you, that gives me hope

Ruby, he'd donated to a married couple 3 years ago with success. No, no co-parenting which is why I don't understand the 'connection' thing either!!! But I guess thats whats important to him. I think perhaps his expectations were off, donating to a single person is perhaps a lot different than donating to a married couple??? And as for NI, lol, NO CHANCE!!!!

I registered on FSDR this afternoon, thats the free one. Talked to one young man not too far away from me who said he's willing to help but my radar's saying NO...he asked for material to get him aroused and asked if he (hope this isn't tmi) 'just had to masturbate in a cup'

Think I'm going to join FDSW, its relatively inexpensive, we'll see what happens...must admit, its feels like such a chore having to find someone else! Just need to keep telling myself, with the right donor, hopefully the end result will be SOOO worth it

 

[ebelle]

Big hugs lian! And i agree with everyone that should listen to your own instinct. We have sicth sense for a reason.

C.30, sorry to hear about the donor backing out. The donor selection process for me and my partner is kinda long and drawn out as we interview each donor twice and after that send them for hiv tests plus sperm analysis. I suppose if you are not under restrictions like us, will be easier to find another donor. Hoping you find someone in time for your positive opk.

 

[faithbabies]

c30...i hate that u are having to find another donor..i know how that is so stressful and i hope u find your match soon...btw dont give up on FSDR just yet..i go there every day and chat with the donors and recips and i love it...one of the moderators is my shipping donor and he's fab and the site is run very well..i would report that guy that talked to u like that..it isnt appropriate and the moderators def dont like to have a rep like that...wish u the best girl!! i also was on FSDW the one that u pay a fee and didnt really find any donors...several donors just didnt return messages but if u dont mind paying for it u might get lucky there too hugs


lian...hugs..i can tell u are frustrated and i feel ya..this was my 4th cycle with my 3rd donor and i am like..hurry up and happen!! lol but i have read it can take up to 6 cycles with one donor so hang in there!! fingers crossed for next cycle....

afm...12dpo and bfn and feels like af is on her way in but i'm ready for next cycle....my friend has some clomid and i'm going to take it and pray for an extra egg for the spermies to catch...i have taken clomid before and it didnt overstimulate me so i'm hoping this cycle is good as well.....ah well, fingers crossed for us all.....

 

[Pinkorblue11]

c.30- That's stinks about the first donor and ugh for the other one you talked to. =/ I agree with faithbabies, definitely report him. I hope you can find another donor soon.

Lian-

faithbabies- Good luck with clomid!

 

[EpdTTC]

Lian-CD 1 should be recorded as your first of full flow. I saw a reproductive endocrinologist for a while and this is what he told me.

 

[Tegans Mama]

Hey ladies

Some of you might remember me from last year when we were ttc... anyway we are gearing to start trying again after our wedding in three weeks time We're going to start looking for a donor soon (we have one prospective donor, we'll look for another if it falls through but fingers crossed!) and I thought I would just get back into the fold of this thread if you all don't mind.

Lots of new faces! Glad to see a lot of new people. And some old ones too - baby dust to all, but especially the ones who have been here a while xxxx

 

[amommy]

E-mailed my donor this morning and just got a reply saying he wasn't happy to carry on because he didn't feel a connection with me. Was GUTTED at first because I now have to go through the process of finding someone new

I guess a part of me isn't totally sorry because on thinking about it, he did stay a bit longer than I had wanted and expected and for various other reasons....I'm on CD3 now so I have at least 7 days (until I start OPK testing!!) to find, talk and be comfortable with someone, is that even possible????

C-30, you may have luck on FSDR there are some flakes, as per usual, but it seems there are many there who are dedicated to helping! I hope you find someone before your OPK is +.. I am in kind of the same boat, the guy I found just stopped talking to me last cycle, and I ended up scrambling to find someone.. GRR! This month hopefully I have it all in place as I am CD 8 and it won't be long!

 

[lian_83]

Hello all. Thanks for the kind words of encouragement. So sad that many of us from the 2ww batch this Aug have succumbed to the witch (rooting for MrsMM24, Ebelle, Ruby). I was so positive that most of us will get an August But ok, on to the Sept

I just e-mailed the other donor that I just don't feel it is right and he politely accepted. I'm trusting (future) LO's voice. I'm ok with donor-friend, it's just that I felt quite betrayed when I found out he went to a hot pool in early July and just found out from his pictures. He is like a very good friend and I don't care if he goes to a hooker (as long as he used protection) but a hot pool!!

 

[SpudsMama]

Welcome back Tegans Mama

Well my donor has offered to come up to me on short notice. All I have to do is test with an OPK every morning and as soon as I get that smiley face, ring him and he'll get on the first train! Looks like I can't go wrong on timing this cycle! xx

 

[c.30]

Thanks ebelle, at the moment the only requirements for donor is that he lives relatively close to me (no longer than an hour drive for either him or myself would be good) and that he's recently been STD checked and has the documentation to prove it. Meeting before hand would be good but I'm also happy to simply meet on the day of donation.

Faithbabies, there was only 2 donors close to me on FSDR, one of whom was that guy - who I have reported - and the other I e-mailed last night. I have registered with FSDW, the trouble with that site is that there are a lot of old profiles of donors who simply don't use the site anymore but I have seen one donor, with a pic, who I may check out.

Thanks Pinkorblue

Hi, Tegans Mama, nice to see you back here, good luck for the wedding.

Amommy, it's horrible isn't it - hope this cycle is successful for you, FX!

TTC Sept, lots of to you

Felt VERY disheartened last night, there were tears before bedtime! Trying to feel a bit more positive today. As said, I've e-mailed one donor and have perhaps a potential other to e-mail as well so FX. REALLY don't want to miss the little egg this month...!

 

[MrsMM24]

So sorry for all the ladies that are having these troubles with donors. I hope that this is all straightened out and you can get a reliable donor soon!

to those that have recevied the dreaded AF, however, I think that LIAN said it best: "on to Sept "

I am afraid I will be looking forward to Sept as well. We caved and tested on 8/21...bfn...I am 15DPO (13DPO by FF) Well, it looks confusing… I mean, on Sunday (DPO14), after inputting my temp, FF changed my OV date. Does this happen often? I mean I am on CD34! Longest cycle ever! I know now, that this is a result of the M/C in July. I am feeling like I am totally out of it this month after seeing that. Current SSing: very tired, BLOATED, bbs tingling every now and then, not hungry often, I have felt sick the last few days when I first wake, but it leaves. I guess I am just waiting now to see if AF ever shows…. Other than that, the weekend was lovely. I hope everyone else is doing better!!!

 

[Tegans Mama]

MrsMM do you KNOW for certain that you O'd? And that you definitely O'd on that date? After my most recent MC (December 23rd last year) I didn't have a period for almost 10 weeks.

 

[MrsMM24]

TEGANS, I had a pos opk on the 7th. But I know that OV occurs with in 1 day of that OV so maybe that is the case here. Or at least I am hoping.... With my normal AF, it is hard to really tell. I OV EVERY month, but I only bleed every other. So we are ALWAYS playing the waiting game....

 

[Pinkorblue11]

I hope you aren't out, MM.

:wave: Tegan's Mama

amommy- that sucks that the donor you were talking to went silent, I hope you find someone else very soon.

c.30- you're welcome! and fx that a new donor comes along so you don't miss the egg.

TTC- great news!!!