Considering at-home insemination with donor sperm...?

[lian_83]

Hi Faith, I also have the same problem. I feel like I'm always 1-2 days off my target O-date. And I also cheaper type tests and it's quite frustrating when you want the 2nd line to just be a bit darker but it's not.. I'm afraid the stress even delays O so it's not helping.. I also used Soy this cycle and it's supposed to make me O 10 days after the last pill, but this cycle it was 13 days after, so it's quite disappointing as well.

 

[Nimyra]

Franco,

I have certainly heard of women using sperm from their partner's relative but I don't think anyone on here has done that (anyone???). Most of us have found known (unrelated) donors or used anonymous donors from a sperm bank.

I personally think there are several reasons to be cautious about donating your sperm to a relative, but it is a personal decision. If your relative conceives and has the baby are you going to feel okay not being the father but having to see the child on a regular basis? Are you going to be comfortable with the parents' decision to tell or not tell the child about their origins? Are there areas for misunderstanding (such as timing donations) that might lead to family drama? What if someone accidentally caught a sexually transmitted infection from you, would that cause family drama? Will other family members know? There are also legal and financial risks that need to be considered.

I think its best to tread carefully and examine your own feelings deeply. If you are excited about the idea, then get yourself tested for STDs, start looking at sample donor contracts (laying out each parties responsibilities) and go from there. Don't feel like you have to donate though just because someone asked you. It has to be the right situation.

 

[Pinkorblue11]

:wave: nimyra

Franco~ Didn't want to read and run... My husband and I discussed the possibility of asking a relative of his that he does get along with but ultimately decided we were better off with a non related donor. The drama factor most likely would have come up one way or another but that's just how his family is. I think Nimyra gave you great food for thought, good luck with your decision and I wish you and your relative the very best.

AFM~ I'm on the egg chase again, crossing my fingers that my donor can do a variation of the smep. If no bfp, l'll have to wait until the new year to ttc again. So loads of baby

Good luck to everyone on the chase, donor searching and in those in the TTW!!!

 

[faithbabies]

lian..thanks for the understanding! it is difficult and challenging esp if u dont have fresh sperm on hand lol fxd we get our bfp's soon!


franco..welcome and i agree with nimyra and pinkorblue...we considered relatives and good friends but end the end anon donor just sounded like a better fit for us...


pinkorblue...tons of baby dust to you!!


afm...so we did insem yesterday with no lh surge and today one opk shows pos lh and the other isnt quite positive ughhhh so i'll do it again later this afternoon...looks like it will be tonite or in the morning when i get +surge so my donor is shipping again tomorrow and i will insem again on tuesday...so if i've already ovulated when i do my insem how do my chances for bfp look?? i've always done it early rather than late...fxd!!

baby dust to everyone trying and in 2ww

 

[day_dreamer]

Franco, I think Miranda and Kirsten (unapologetik) are using a relative...or it might be an in-law (can't remember sorry) so it might be worth asking them?

I'm currently trying to write a contract for our new donor...I'm not 100% sure on him, but I'm hoping he's just shy and quiet because he's young, and that we'll get to know him better in time.

 

[donorhope87]

Hi thank you for your suggestions! I guess I've never really thought about all the consequences. But I would do everything to make her happy.
This is the story. My aunt has been always a part of my life , she helped my mom ( her sister) to rise me. My mom is a single mom. Now my aunt who is still pretty young and her partner want to have a baby on their own and she and her wife asked me if I could donate my semen to them. I guess I've never been so embarassed in all my life. But I think it would be great to help them. SHe has done a lot of things for me in the past. I do not have stds I'm a blood donor and I do not want to have parental rights over the baby. I want the baby to belong to them and no one else. But I'm still confused. My mom of course will not kno about this. I guess she would kill me if only she knew.
But I would feel very very bad saying no to my aunt.
Another question , how can get in touch with unapologetik in this forum?
Franco

 

[sparklie]

Hi Franco, I'm new here but just had to say please consider your relationship with your mum, you say that she won't know about the donation because she'd kill you, all I'm saying is that I know you love your aunt but please don't ruin your relationship with your mum. This is a very difficult situation to be in and I think it needs a lot of careful thought and consideration and please don't feel pressurised into donating because she's your aunt. I hope you manage to work this out without hurting yourself or family.

Teri



Teri

 

[sparklie]

Morning ladies, I need your advice again. I found a local donor and we were talking on Friday but I haven't heard back from him since I suggested we meet for coffee in town to discuss things further. I really thought I would have heard back by now as he was quick to respond on Friday. I know it's only Monday and feel like I'm being paranoid but I'm now worrying that if he can't respond over the weekend what will happen if I ovulate on a weekend in the future. I do have an offer of a back up donor and I'm thinking of getting in touch with him again.

Do you think I should wait and hear or go for the back up wrigglies?

Here's some Monday morning baby dust for everyone

 

[ticking.clock]

i think you need to go with your gut instinct

my donor is available with just an hours notice so i am lucky, he knows i do an OPK first thing (6am) and i'll email him if its positive so he checks his emails around 8am and if positive will arrange to meet if we dont already have it planned.

just did 2nd donation of this cycle so now in our TWW 7lets see if Gails prediction is right

 

[Nimyra]

Sparklie,

I say its always a good idea to have a back-up plan. Waiting to hear back from donor is so stressful, you don't need to add stress to the situation.

Franco,

I don't think this is something that should be secret from your Mom. These things always come out sooner or later. Better to be upfront and have an honest discussion now, before you've committed.

 

[MrsMM24]

Welcome back :wave: NIMYRA! GL with the donor search and egg chase!

TWINS, I think the Maddy idea is so very cute... Our daughter calls DW Mom and she calls me Mommy. She is VERY adament about people distiniguishing between us, it is rather cute. Our families now do the same. It was easier as when she was about 5, she "realized" we were both women and she doesn't want anyone confusing that fact.... We originally were going to go with Momma M or L as they did no the L-word, but she went with her own variation...Good Luck....

:wave: to new additions.

Franco, it is definitely something to thoroughly think through. I have always thought it would be hard for a person to interact with "their" child if they were in the same room often... UNAPOLOGETIK is using a family member so they would be GREAT to talk to on here.

AFM...Nothing new to report but you can...stalk my chart!! Started OPKs this weekend. I found a few minutes in the weekend to get my hair done, I have been however, cleaning the house soooo much... lol, I never sit and rest! I hope you all have had a GREAT weekend!

 

[faithbabies]

hey ladies, just an update to let yall know after looking over my opk's i def had lh surge yesterday between 8am and 12p..reminder i did AI the day before at noon...i feel like i ovulated yesterday evening as i had alot of cramping but who knows..anyway so i cancelled the shipment for wed as i'm sure that would be too late..really think this cycle is a bust too...with shipping and not enough ice on the swimmers i'm thinking i inseminated too early ah well try again next month ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh


baby dust to everyone else!

 

[SpudsMama]

faithbabies - an insem the day before a positive OPK isn't too early, I'd say you're definitely in the two week wait! I don't know whether that's good news or bad news though xx

 

[topazicatzbet]

timing wise was fine hun, better to have them there waiting. i dont know much about the shipping though, hope there were some strong little swimmers in there.

 

[faithbabies]

thank you TTC and Topaz!! i hope there were some strong swimmers as well! so i'm saying for poops and giggles that i'm 1dpo but not sure how accurate that is haha 2ww =

 

[Nimyra]

aw good luck, huh. It only takes one strong swimmer.

I was thinking about doing shipping with our last donor but I don't know that its really going to be worth all the hassle and stress. I'm hopeful about a new local donor I found and am still emailing with one or two others.

But still several days from CD1 so it will probably be late in the month before I am trying. can't wait. so impatient.

 

[Pinkorblue11]

Fx for super swimmers, Faith!!

TTC~ Sending bfp vibes!!!

AFM~ Looks like my variation of SMEP is a go this cycle! My donor is available for 4 of the 5 days I wanted, can't wait to get started!

 

[ticking.clock]

well according to FF i ovulated on sat
we did donation on fri pm and today ive had some spotting

fingers crossed

 

[SpudsMama]

Sounds like perfect timing ticking! xx

 

[Mama_Of_One]

Good luck all those in the TWW or upcoming TWW's

I broke my left wrist a week ago so i have been struggling to just go to the toilet let alone check my cm Im a bit annoyed but I guess Im thankful that Im not yet TTC that could have been awkward trying to do everything one handed anyway one of my friends is 6 weeks preg, my cousin is 8 weeks and sister is 33 weeks ahhhhh im jealous lol

good luck all