Could use a buddy

[SleepyOwl]

Sashimi - I am praying that little bean is making itself at home right now! S/he needs to snuggle in good and not leave for 9 months. I'm sure this will be your longest TWW ever, but the girls are right - just try to stay busy and stay positive!

Pino - I should be O'ing in a few days. Got my first day of EWCM today but don't think I'll be able to BD . Hopefully we'll be up for it tomorrow! I think I'm CD 8 actually.

For the record, I'm sick with a fever and a stiff arm and I totally blame my flu and tetanus shot. I am physically incapable of BD'ing at this point!!

Country - I feel pretty good about my 30th birthday. I'm not feeling old or anything like that! Well not yet at least!! I really try to make sure that every year, no matter the number, I make sure I give thanks that I have been able to have another year with my family and my husband. I know I have a lot more than others and I don't want to lose perspective of that or be ungrateful for it.

 

[lauren26]

Sleepy - Such an amazing attitude!! I love your birthday mindfulness. What day is your bday? You might have already said...I am sorry you're not feeling well Maybe time for lazy BD again?

Sashimi - We are here for you and that little one, sister!

Pino - I'm so sorry you're feeling down. I wish you guys were able to see a doc! TTC can feel so hopeless at times. You totally deserve your BFP and I am holding out for you this month!

 

[SleepyOwl]

Totally forgot to actually post when my bday is : 9/19! My dad and bro are actually also born in Sept so we have lots to celebrate

 

[lxb]

it has been quiet here~~~~ i miss my crazy ladies~!

how/where is everyone?

I hope 16-inches of hair will be put to good use~

Spoiler

 

[SleepyOwl]

16 inches!!! I would be bald lol. Good for you for doing that - did you do Locks for Love? It sure has been quiet today. Anyone have fun plans for the long weekend? Got a surprise party for a friend tomorrow so that should be a good time. Other than that - being lazy and BD'ing!!

 

[Pino6161]

Lxb--- I would be bald as well, and possibly headless

I'm not doing much, but boy have I had a day!!

Today me and MIL took the car to the dealer mechanic, and I expected we would be there most of the day as the motor has a ticking sound. Well we got there and MIL put up a big fit about having to wait, so we left.My FIL was PISSED and so was OH. It came down to why the heck MIL even wanted to come!!! So now my OH is going to take Friday off and we will take the car in, and take the other car.

Then I was at MIL's house and my lawyer called.... I guess his work visa will be here within a week or 2. We have an appt w/ her Sept. 26 to prep for our final interview with immigration on Oct. 3. He will either be approved or not on the 3rd for his residency, and will have it within a month of that!

We are so excited, and surprised how fast it is all going.

Other than that I hope to relax this weekend. Sleeping has felt like a chore. I will be watching tv exhausted, but the minute I am in bed I am wide awake. It sucks. Especially cause the last 2 nights I have gotten a migraine.

FF finally gave me cross-hairs on CD 20. I got a moment of cramps today, it was really weird I am trying not to think to much into it. I also had a dream last night, very vivid about BFP's like I kept peeing on sticks and they were positive. Talk about weird

 

[preg_pilot]

I had dreams of peeing on BFP sticks when I got my BFP.
Fingers crossed

 

[treasured]

Hi girls!

Feel like ive missed so much over the past few days haha! How is everyone?

lxb- that is A LOT of hair. can I steal some of it to put on my head cause I dont have very much do you feel its your new start

sleepy- hope you feel better so you can enjoy your birthday!!

lauren- yours the MS going? you still getting it bad so exciting for your scan soon and congrats on the new house

pino- ooohh yay for cross hairs but your cramps could be promising if you dont usually get them

sashimi- this must be SO tough for you this week but atleast you know that there is deffinately one really good egg in there so you are half of the way there! any symptoms you get will most probably be real and proof that your egg is growing!!

as for me im pretty sure I O'd yesterday on CD14 again, although my temp dipped on CD13, and rose on 14, is that right? got my + opk yesterday though so CD14 is fine by me got a few BD's every second day in hopefully enough but OH was too tired yesterday . Sooo we shall see....

Also hello to everyone else that I missed!! xxx

 

[Pino6161]

Preg_pilot--- I am really hoping the dreams are a sign! Even if I am only 4 DPO

Treasured--- I usually get a slight dip as well, so no worries

Where is everyone???

 

[preg_pilot]

Preg_pilot--- I am really hoping the dreams are a sign! Even if I am only 4 DPO

Treasured--- I usually get a slight dip as well, so no worries

Where is everyone???

Fingers crossed for you

 

[lauren26]

I am in te mountains!! Wish I could post a pic but I don't know how from my phone...SIL finally wants to spend tons of time with me now that I am pg. I think she just felt guilty before. MS is pretty bad but worth it and I am having so much fun with my nieces and nephew!! Will write more when I'm not just on my phone but missing you ladies.

 

[SleepyOwl]

Glad you're having a nice time Lauren! I hope the MS eases up a bit.

Had a surprise bday BBQ for one of my closest friends yesterday. She just turned 30 as well. One of the girls there has been ttc for 1.5 years and you could tell how badly she wanted a baby by the way she was playing and watching the babies at the party. I felt so sad for her she is 35 and feels like time is running out and I had no words for her.

Other than that the party was great. Now trying to get myself in the shower to get ready for church and to visit my parents. Feeling soo lazy though!!

 

[Pino6161]

Lauren---- Have fun!!!

Sleepy--- Are there really ANY words for people that have been trying and trying to no success?? It sucks but all you can really do is be supportive

Where is everyone else???

Sash--?? How are you feeling???


So my temp actually went up rather than stabilizing like normal, I am hoping it is a good sign FX. My house is clean, and I am feeling much better.I love the clean smell in the morning

 

[SashimiMimi]

Hi Ladies. I've been lurking on the board here, but not really saying anything. I'm feeling super pessimistic and just feel like I've set myself up here for the ultimate disappointment. I know feeling positive so important through all this, but I was completely blindsided by the low fertilization rate and only having 1 good embryo out of 15. I know one is better than none, but I can't stop thinking about how my doctor informed me of my poor egg quality and I wonder if I will ever have biological children. It's been pretty upsetting knowing once and for all the problem has been me and I feel like a failure as both a wife and a human being.

I don't know if its because it was mentioned on the boards here or what, but I had POAS BFP dreams last night which I have never had before. It was nice and I was sad when I woke up and it wasn't real.

I've been lurking on some other IVF boards where people have had multiple failed IVFs and it is SO depressing! I do not need to be reading that stuff, yet I can't seem to stop.

I guess I just feel like if this was going to work, I'd feel it. I feel nothing, I have no symptoms of implantation which would have happened by now and I'm trying to figure out how I am going stay sane until my test date on Sept 12. I'm terrified to use HPTs because if I don't get that double line, I know I won't be able to function.

Finally, some friends invited us over next weekend. They were the ones I didn't want to see after they had their second baby in June because they always were asking me if I had any news, saying that I needed to just relax and that I was young and have tons of time for this to work. (Well that last part is not true with my low ovarian reserve diagnosis.) I know last time we saw them it was fine, and they were surprisingly supportive. But now, it's different and I don't know if I can handle being around their kids.

OH is being totally supportive about everything. I can't lift anything over 20 lbs right now as per doctors orders, so OH had to come grocery shopping with me yesterday and he carried everything in and helped put stuff away. I know I keep driving him nuts asking repeatedly if he thinks this is going to work or not.

Anyway, sorry for the long vent. I wish I could find it in me to be optimistic and positive again. I'm trying, but it's hard!

 

[treasured]

sashimi- I think you are actually doing really well to control the fear that I know you must have. Even being able to share your feelings with us is good because you cant let yourself be alone at this time! And about reading all the failed IVF posts in that section... your mind is just wanting you to focus on them because you dont want to be set up for disapointment, but did you find yourself reading any positive ones or success stories? Just remember how often IVF does work for people and is a miracle for so many women, and I truly believe you have no reason not for the same success The doctor said that your main egg was a great one and that means you have a good chance! I know I cant take away your doubt and cant even imagine how tough this is for you but try not to focus on the bad because there is always good waiting round the corner So glad OH is being so supportive this is going to make you too so much stronger and together

pino- IM HERE hehe! excited about your temp!! this is deffinately a good sign for you Im confused by my temps this month too, barely a noticible rise for Ov, although FF spotted it... but they have been up and down soo much.. meh, im not too bothered this month for some reason.

sleepy- that party sounds fuunnn! and pino is right, all we can do for others in that situation is be supportive. In a way we can sympathize although no amount of that can take away from the pain of not conceiving every month, as we all know first hand! atleast she is able to get on with things and spend time with children without breaking down liek I know I have a few times haha!

so... Ive been feeling a bit down of recent just with regards to OHs behaviour towards me. Its nothing extreme, I just feel a bit neglected recently. When we first got together he was always all over me and gave me kisses and hugs, and I know of course when you are with someone for such a long time the spark isnt as bright. But I just wish he would show some more affection. Its like some sort of mission for him to give me a kiss these days.... Im starting to worry that its the strain of TTC and me going on at him all the time that is distancing him from me :S. In a way it has put me off TTC this month and so Im not expecting much or a bfp . I know he loves me and its nothing to do with that but I just wonder why he doesnt seem to show it as much anymore... its like Im annoying him if I want to be cuddly or romantic.. Gah, maybe he needs a refresh button that I can press and get the exiting OH I met back hah! Anyone else have this problem? Is your spark still there? I know yours is Pino hahaha!!! xxxx

 

[Pino6161]

Sash--- I had the same dreams. I know what you mean by waking up and the disappointment eating you. I know that being positive is very difficult especially if you are scared to get your hopes up. I know words don't really help, but I have my fingers crossed for you, and you are in my prayers

Treasured--- You would be surprised we have gone through exactly what you are. The key is to rekindle it. I know that many OH's, including mine also feel neglected as TTC is the first thing on our mind, and we BD for the sperm. We have to show them that there sperm isn't the ONLY reason we are with them. Make the first move, that is the best suggestion I can give, and some spice .... Your should get a solid dot after you go up a bit again. Mine was dotted until today, so I wouldn't worry about that.

I am cautiously optimistic, as for the first time in a long time I FEEL like I ovulated. It's probably all in my head, but whatever keeps me going right??

 

[treasured]

pino- Glad you got through that phase!! gives me hope haha Thing is... I often do try to seduce OH and I pretty much ALWAYS make the first move, but it doesnt seem to entice him. I mean hes said himself that he doesnt have a high sex drive but he did when we first got together. I have also put on a little bit of weight since we first met, Im not overweight or anything but I feel that this has put him off a little too? He makes jokes about it and says hes kidding but it doesnt exactly give me confidence!

I never got solid crosshairs last month either... hmm, must be something a little off, it might be because my AF temps are so high? god knowws!

How are you pino? any other symptoms showing up yet? xxx

 

[preg_pilot]

so... Ive been feeling a bit down of recent just with regards to OHs behaviour towards me. Its nothing extreme, I just feel a bit neglected recently. When we first got together he was always all over me and gave me kisses and hugs, and I know of course when you are with someone for such a long time the spark isnt as bright. But I just wish he would show some more affection. Its like some sort of mission for him to give me a kiss these days.... Im starting to worry that its the strain of TTC and me going on at him all the time that is distancing him from me :S. In a way it has put me off TTC this month and so Im not expecting much or a bfp . I know he loves me and its nothing to do with that but I just wonder why he doesnt seem to show it as much anymore... its like Im annoying him if I want to be cuddly or romantic.. Gah, maybe he needs a refresh button that I can press and get the exiting OH I met back hah! Anyone else have this problem? Is your spark still there? I know yours is Pino hahaha!!! xxxx

Yeah, I´ve been through these patches with OH.
What always works for me, is to forget about the for a while.
I take him for a drive, and a picnic somewhere exclusive, where we either talk, or read, or just relax. Does wonders for us.
Starts him thinking, and pulls him out of whatever he´s busy thinking about to actually be with me

 

[Pino6161]

Treasured--- I would not worry about the weight gain to much. Your body is only a tiny part of what he fell in,love with. I don't think ANY of us have the same sex drive from when we first met. I got sick about a year after me and OH met. I weighed 145 lbs i gained A LOT. I hit 237 lbs which I am still trying to lose. Sex might not be the answer in your case me and OH have a lot of it,I admit, but it is NOT our entire relationship. Try what preg_pilot said, and just get out, get out of the house and do something new.

My temp dropped a bit more today, but not under my cover line. I think it might be cause the first time in a LONG time I showered at night, and went to bed with wet hair. IDK. Last night while me and OH were BDing I got a pain in my right side. I don't know how to explain it, but it was very uncomfortable. It might have been cause I was on top. It is rare when I am on top just cause it is really painful on my knees.... Anyways....Also I notice my blue veins every month after I O. Yesterday I thought they were more noticeable but now I have no idea I am the WORST symptom spotter EVER, and even my OH said so Today I have to start working on my blanket for my niece again... I hope that I can finish it for X Mas

 

[lxb]

pino - AHh... I crochet blanket for my niece too!! (wel... ~3 years ago and got it just in time for christmas!) Glad to hear you feel you've Oed. FX for you! BFP dreams are definitely good sign!

treasured

sashimi - how are you feeling? only few more days 'til test day! It's normal not to 'feel' it's happening but I bet the embryo is developing just fine~ our body is so complicated and sometimes our minds think what we want to think or feel what we want to feel. I remember I had a dream within dream (I dream that I got bfp... then i woke up from that dream and go af... and i woke up from THAT dream.. realized I still haven't tested!) it can be so cruel as it felt so real. and I can smell your bfp coming soon! Sept 12th is a great date!

treasured - it's normal for sex drive to go down after a while (especially when you're ttc). that's when you start getting comfortable with the other person and really gel as one and have that special connection. DH and I have been together for 8.5 years (married for 1.5 years). We don't say we love each other every day, which a lot of couples do. because we dont want it to become a 'greeting'. it's funny when we first going out, dh opened the car door for me and hold my hand even when he was driving. And he told me (8.5 years ago) that he will always open the car door for me and hold my hand. Funny thing is... I just reminded him of that yesterday. Because years later, he got a manual car and his hand is no longer free to hold my hand because he had to do stick shift. Then, I got a car later on (which we always drive on weekend) and it can do keyless entry (so I can have the key in my bag to unlock the door for the both of us). So ... he no longer "open" the door for me (not a habit anymore) and no longer "hold" my hand while he drives! And I was giving him a hard time yesterday