COURT pls help

[Dream.dream]

if he does get access on his own, request random drug tests. There'll be no hiding his use of drugs then. Unfortunately, courts won't take facebook status's into account you can take screenshots & take them to court anyway, but it won't determine their decision. x

actually they will take facebook postings and stuff like that.

thats how my ex screwed himself. i print them all along with every email, and handed a binder for the judge to see. he said the facebook statuses show apattern of behavior.

Make sure you write down everything that happens , that way you have specific dates and what happened that way you seem more credible good luck

 

[angelpkj]

All the best hun. How long from when he started visitation proceedings against you did you get the court date 18th April? Will everything be decided that day? Did you get legal aid? - sorry loads of questions.

Like I said in a reply to one of you posts earlier I did not put him on the BC - do you know what step is next with getting on the cert and visitation.

xxx

he went to solicitors to start the process of sending me letters etc in november

oh i really feel for you thats awful, i started court process last september! FOB didnt want anything to do with LO until his first birthday, then starting threatening to take me to court if he didnt get what he wanted, which he did. FOB doesnt take drugs, alcohol etc, that must be an added worry for u. I was also told that a judge isnt really interested in what your ex has done to u in the past, unless u have proof, it is his word against urs! hopefully he wont get legal aid and will be unable to take it any further, as it is very expensive. best advice i can give is to keep a log of everything, with times and dates, and try not to bring up petty details in court as judge wont be interested, looks like tit for tat.

I worked part time and although i get legal aid, i have to pay a certain amount back per month for the next 5 years!

all the best x

THANKS X

if he does get access on his own, request random drug tests. There'll be no hiding his use of drugs then. Unfortunately, courts won't take facebook status's into account you can take screenshots & take them to court anyway, but it won't determine their decision. x

actually they will take facebook postings and stuff like that.

thats how my ex screwed himself. i print them all along with every email, and handed a binder for the judge to see. he said the facebook statuses show apattern of behavior.

Make sure you write down everything that happens , that way you have specific dates and what happened that way you seem more credible good luck

WILL DO HUN X

 

[angelpkj]

RIGHT!

so i got court wed
got a legal aid letter back and there saying they will pay some costs but i need to make a cheaque and send it asap before they will give me any help
they want £1025 off me
because i have 3 and half grand in an ISA they see it as i should pay

im fuming!
that money i can't even TOUCH till april next year!they should base their choice on what i money i have at my hands to touch right now!!

even if i had £1025 at my disposal to send a cheque to them today there is no way i will have my legal aid in place for wednesday

meaning its looking like court will be ajourned till its all gone through with legal aid
glad about that as no doubt fob wont of got LO a birthday gift etc by the following sat so that somethin else i can throw at him in court

not glad that iv built up to this moment and its postponed

my sister sent me a cd with all the print screens of stuff hes said and done
theres pictures of him with mushrooms and weed and smoking it
comments of him regarding drugs and all illegal activity going on in the home

also a nice little essay he wrote saying he hopes i die a sudden slow painful death and LO will be 1000% better off without me being his wretched fat **** bitch of a mother

that got my blood boiling cause if i wasnt here then LO would have to be put into care!!

its getting stressful today trying to get all my info together in time and with it being a saturday today my solicitors is shut so i cant even tell her whats going on etc i left a voicemail for her to ring me straight away on monday tho and did tell her whats going on

i've only printed off info where about fob that is
drug related
all weekend partys at his house related
anything hes mentioned court or mediation or personal proceedings
the essay about my death
stuff where hes been puttin about getting fucked while his daughter is at his house sleeping over

there is alot more stuff where hes been slagging me off but i dont see that as helpful cause as much as it paints a picture of him to the court it might seem like im trying to show what he did to me -and that means shit in court how i felt or what he did while i was pregnant etc

 

[angelpkj]

also now as im having to pay some towards my legal fees anyway i may aswel go csa now
i put it off before as it could affect if i got legal aid or not
still bit iffy about it as i dont want fob feeling he has to stick around cause he has to pay
however part of me thinks that wont matter to him

 

[BigZai]

I doubt he will pay good luck

 

[Dream.dream]

i know here after everything was done the judge made my sons dad pay for my legal costs because his actions caused us to have to go to court, which was awsome. maybe you can ask your lawyer when you get one if they can ask for that as well.

 

[angelpkj]

thats really good how did that go about
i'll speak to my solicitor about that monday x

 

[angelpkj]

spoke to my solicitor today
she is writing to court and his solicitor to ajourn it for 2 weeks so it gives my legal aid time to come through
glad in a way that its LO's birthday sat so i can finally look forward to that
glad that FOB wont get LO anything for his birthday either so can bring that up in court and hopefully it being LO's birthday it will prevoke him to show some more of his true colours again more ammo for court

spoke to CAFCASS telling them of whats going to be happening
she informed me that she wrote to fobs solicitor about him putting the court details on facebook ... i just interupted and went ahh yes he has put it on facebook that he had got a letter off his solicitor asking im to remove it-hes not happy about it he put "how pathetic is that" and then proceeded to call me a fat bitch etc

cafcass was just shocked she couldnt believe FOBs attitude at all she said he is digging himself a very very deep hole and is forgetting this is about our son and not public point scoring

happy fob is shooting himself in the foot with his ways!!finally people are seeing what i see

 

[Lemonflower]

He sounds like a proper idiot - I'm glad for you that he's such a idiot that he has dug himself a hole. My FOB is s bit more cleverer and says things verbally and doesn't write them down.

I'm really shocked about the legal aid - did you have to declare what you had moneywise. I have about the same amount in an ISA - shall i get it out or transfer it to my mum ?

I still haven't heard anything from FOB yet so we'll see what his next move is.....

What access do you think your FOB will get. Are you saying that you don't want him having access or are you agreeing to some?

xxxx

 

[angelpkj]

He sounds like a proper idiot - I'm glad for you that he's such a idiot that he has dug himself a hole. My FOB is s bit more cleverer and says things verbally and doesn't write them down.

I'm really shocked about the legal aid - did you have to declare what you had moneywise. I have about the same amount in an ISA - shall i get it out or transfer it to my mum ?

I still haven't heard anything from FOB yet so we'll see what his next move is.....

What access do you think your FOB will get. Are you saying that you don't want him having access or are you agreeing to some?

xxxx

the savings amount cant be higher than 3 grand so get rid of as much money as u can or give it your mum!sooner the better cause if u do it once your aware of court etc they will question it

the best case he will get is up to 3 hours in a contact center
im saying i dont want fob around LO because of how he is but im not saying no to a contact center just keep sayin as long as my son is safe from his debt collecters and if FOB is drugged up

course i wish i could say keep that pathetic excuse of a father away from my son and over my dead body he shall see LO

but i cant
cause itl make me look unreasonable and bad even if i every right to ffeel and think that



SO HERES THE UPDATE

as i wont get legal aid in time for tomorrow (wed) court has been ajourned until 2nd may

FOB is FUMING

he has made 3 facebook rants about me so far and its only been 4 hours since he would of been told

calling me allsorts

hes even put that iv told his best mates dad he has a drug problem???

god knows what hes going on about just more BS to get his devoted facebook fans on his bandwagon


but ahhh well LO is 1 on sat and no doubt no gift or card off FOB so more ammo and no doubt fob will have a horrible rant about me that day also

 

[angelpkj]

FOB has since told his friend on facebook publicly
"cut her up for me"
his friend said "i'll chainsaw the munter"

then various other friends of FOB started saying about drop kicking me and fob said there is a line and he is first in line

so obv was abit shocked by all this-nothin new fob calling me and his loyal fans joining in but to be like this about cutting me etc
so i rang the police and got it logged
rang cafcass and told them hes getting worse and more agressive with stuff he is saying and is still puttin stuff about court on fb

it was LO's birthday sat his first birthday
no card nothing off fob or any of his family
he put on fb happy birthday to my son love you so much
pah!

 

[BigZai]

I really hope it goes in your favor thanks for updating. Do you want his rights terminated or supervised visits? I am just curious what you hope for

 

[jemmie1994]

the way he is acting is disgusting hopefully it all goes in your favour against him

 

[angelpkj]

I really hope it goes in your favor thanks for updating. Do you want his rights terminated or supervised visits? I am just curious what you hope for

i wish i could have his rights terminated

he's on the BC so way its gunna be is supervised access
i point blank refuse unsupervised access and if at any moment he gets that then i will stop contact again as my sons safety comes first

in a perfect world i would ban this man from getting any contact with LO in any way shape or form

the last thing i want is to deal with LO growing up swearing drinking and taking drugs because of his dads relaxed attitude-playing us off agaisnt each other and me constantly being "mean mummy" etc etc

of course im not stupid and LO could end up smoking or drugs with or without FOB being in the picture

but FOB wont help things one bit him and his family are very loud,sweary and without being a snob jermery kyle tackle i want LO to realise NOT to be like that not think its ok

 

[BigZai]

You are from the UK right?

 

[BigZai]

well I think you should talk to your lawyer or whoever to work out a will
If he gets supervised vistation idk if he has any parental rights
If he does that may be a huge problem lets say you get killed or in a coma, he may be the caretaker of your son then.
I dont want to have you worry about another thing but if your going to court already you should make sure he cant get your LO if something happens to you

 

[angelpkj]

yes from the UK

i did sort out doing my will but my washer broke so the 80 quid plus VAT had to go on my washer

I think given the threatening behaviour its deffo made me want to do my will so i'm going to book an appointment to do it today

as FOB is on the BC i dont know if regardless of what my will says-he will get LO anyone

as harsh as this may sound but i'd rather LO go into care-i know he would be safer there

my cousins have already verbally said they will have LO if i go before them

 

[xxsteffyxx]

as FOB is on the BC i dont know if regardless of what my will says-he will get LO anyone

Not the case. I wrote a will once Harvey was born, and it has been changed since Harvey's dad and I split up and if anything should happen to me Harvey will be living with my mum. My mum will become Harvey's legal guardian should anything happen to me.

Harvey's dad has violence issues and as long as you can say this to someone who is writing your will, then anything on the will is LEGAL BINDING! Unless you are married FOB does not need to agree to this in a will

xx

 

[sophxx]

If you write a will and leave you. Child to some one say your mum your fob would have to go to court to prove He was better carding for the child depending on his case and the judge he might get lo x

 

[angelpkj]

thats amazing to know that you

one less worry!

my solicitor doing my head in tho!

court is wednesday my legal aid came through sat-she was suppose to be ringing me to get me to come in to write my statement for court yet i've heard nothing!
i rang her on monday to let her know the legal aid has come thru and can i book in to do my will but had to leave the message with a secretary

no joy

wish she had the same passion for this case as me