D & C scheduled for thurs - not coping... UPDATE PG 4

[hannah76]

take care smidgen! hope you can get some sleep tonight and be well rested for thu. i'll be thinking of you... keep us updated

 

[Tulip]

Just to warn you Smidge, hopefully I was unlucky with my local hosp....

I demanded to know what had happened to my baby before I left the hospital yesterday and no-one would give me an answer til I cornered the consultant and asked if my baby was now clinical waste once histology was finished with her. He was embarassed enough to say yes Losing her is one thing but not having her treated appropriately by the place that terminated her is heartbreaking

 

[smidgen]

Oh god tulip - i am so sorry. Why did Ruby get put to clinical waste after histology and not cremated. I thought from what most of the girls has said, was that the babies were cremated once you gave permission. Did they not ask you or do you think it was because Ruby was taken away for testing??

 

[Tulip]

I have no idea.... was too upset to push the matter and just wanted to go home. There was no choice given to me. But hey.... body and soul are separate. We can give her comfort in other ways.

 

[Drazic<3]

I am so sorry for your loss smidgen

I chose medical management as I was told you couldn't take the remains home with D&C. I had to row a little and sign a consent form but eventually got my own way! Agree it with the EPU before anything is done and they will allow it. You will need to clarify it with them but due to the procudure of D&C the remains are not one, so they won't let you. However, many hospitals cremate the babies and some people prefer this. HUGE to tulip, I am horrified to hear they did that too you.

I was told to go home on the Thursday and to choose what I wanted to do and ring them. I think I went out of my mind. I binge ate and cried really, then I wouldn't eat and cry. Gosh, it was like hell. This place stopped me from going out of my mind really.

If you need a friend or have any questions, I'm always a PM away

 

[smidgen]

well ladies, think that's me signing off for a bit. am having d & c tomorrow and don't think i will feel up to signing on as will have mum and OH fussing over me when get back from hospital. will be in touch soon to let you know it all went though xx

 

[Drazic<3]

Good luck darling -x-

 

[scrawford65]

Hi Smidgeon

First of all, I also felt terrible knowing my baby had died inside me 2 weeks before I found out. I waited a further week to miscarry.

Have you thought of natural miscarriage? I much prefer that to a d&c - no scar tissue to prevent implantation next time around.

Good luck with your appointment and I'm sending you heaps of baby dust when you TTC again.

x

 

[Tulip]

Thinking of you today Smidge xx

 

[KittyKatBabe]

Hi Smidgen, thinking of you today, hope the next few days pass easily for you hun x x

 

[Charlotteee]

Good luck today sweetheart, i know its hard, and you probably can't do this right now - but be strong. She'll be with you all the way helping you. Next to your shoulder xxxxx

 

[Drazic<3]

Thinking of you darling

 

[tinybutterfly]

thinking of you (((hugs)))

 

[SmileyShazza]

I know by time you see this you'll probably already have had your op but just wanted to say am thinking of you hun.

Hope that all goes well and you have a good recovery afterwards. make sure you let us know how you got on.

 

[bbb2009]

thinking of you today

 

[hannah76]

hope you're recovering well and soaking in all that care taking from your family...

 

[smidgen]

An update ladies... went into hospital at 1000am yesterday, was put on a gynae ward with a load of old biddies laughing about xmas and the snow etc - totally did my head in. My nurse wasn't even a midwife and waffled a load of crap when I was asking her questions! I didn't get taken down to theatre til 1500hrs, despite being told 1200,1300, 1400 so as you can imagine it was a very long morning and I was a nervous wreck. So got down to theatre was put on theatre bed and had to wait a further 20 mins whilst they found the consultant who'd gone aWOL - and that's when I totally freaked and broke down - was wanting to get of the table and just let it happen naturally but they managed to calm me down. Anyway when I came round after the EVAC (as they called it - not very nice IMO), I was extremely sorry - was rolling about the bed in pain so they had to give me morphine! By the time I got back upstairs, my OH was going off his head as they hadn't told him why a 40 min procedure turned in 1hr 40mins! So they said I'd have to wait a good few hrs before they'd let me home. Then I couldn't pee despite having drunk 5 mugs of tea, 2 litres of water -so they were planning to catheterise me! however after the pressure of a bladder scan I managed a few trickles and persuaded them to let me home. So I got to leave at 2200hrs - so was there for 12hrs instead of 4!

Unfortunately I haven't managed to sleep a wink though - every time I close my eyes I keep on seeing the orange clinical waste bags and can't get it out of my head that my ruby might have been put in one of them like tulips - even though they did tell me that she would be cremated...

The pain is bearable today as got tramadol, paracetamol and some buscopan from the them. The bleeding isn't to heavy now either - was bad last night though. But my heart is breaking still - I just feel so numb and empty.

 

[debgreasby]

Sounds like you had a bit of a nightmare. Hugs for you.

I was told at my hospital that all the angel babies are cremated together now (unless the parents wish to make alternate arrangements).

Rest up and let your family take care of you. xxx

 

[Tulip]

Oh sweetie I'm so sorry you had such an awful time At least you finally made it home. Please, please don't think about your Ruby being thrown away - they told you she will be cremated properly and you must take their word for it or, believe me, it'll drive you to distraction. I've emailed Medway PALS about my concerns and asking for clarification about what happened to my girl and it has been forwarded to Head of Obs, so I hope to get some answers and if necessary will do everything in my power to stop it happening to others.

Debs, I will visit Charlie's page soon.... just a bit hard at the moment. Really want to see how beautiful he was.

Big hugs all round xx

 

[hannah76]

smidgen, sorry that you had such a rough day. things always take so much longer than expected in hospitals, eh? glad you're home now and recovering though. i hope you can get some sleep soon... take care x x x x