Disco Derail! - TTCAL/PAL Discussion and Support!

[vickyd]

Hearty i totally agree with Nato...As soon as i read your post i thought wow she will get a consultation with the best! I think this meeting will clear up alot of things hun,such a rare opportunity!

Nato i know that im enabling them but to be honest im not the kind of person who bothers too much with trying to change whats wrong...I dont have the patience and generally i loathe confrontation that i know will lead nowhere. Hearty was very accurate in her description of me...I do have pretty thic skin except when it comes to baby stuff lol!!! Heck i got through a 4 year Phd working in a group the head of which was a mean gay who thought women had no place in science, and was the only female to be accepted in 15 years. The prof called me Ricky for the first 3 years.... I can deal with anyone after him!

 

[yogi77]

Sparkly I love your reading too!! I totally want one now!

 

[Sparkly]

I was gutted when I first read it......I'm too impatient to wait until next summer to get up the duff!!!

The older lady she speaks of is my Grandma.....but her name was May not June!! Close though eh? My angel was due on her birthday....coincidence? When I got a 'Gail' reading earlier this year, she too mentioned an older lady in spirit around me, with a name beginning with M!!....spooked!!

 

[Megg33k]

Loving all the readings! Wow! I just can't do it... I don't want to influence my possible PMA for this process if it were to say it will be a while still. I need to stay as positive as possible, ya know? So, I'm avoiding it!

I'll have a look in your journal, Jaymie!

Sorry the witch hasn't shown, Luce! Hmph!

Oh... what am I missing? Memory isn't what it used to be! Can I just say as a blanket statement that I love you all and I'm sorry if I missed replying directly to you?

Sorry, my head is spinning from Christmas shopping! About $100 worse for the wear, but i finished the 3 kids in the family. We didn't do anything extravagant this year, because none of them need anything. The 2 younger ones (5 and 1) are brother and sister and have EVERYTHING in the world already. Spoiled rotten... partially my own fault! So, just did some little things... PJ's, a couple of toys, not much more. The older girl (10) thinks she's all grown up, but isn't quite there yet. So, its hard. She doesn't like for other people to pick her clothes anymore. She doesn't do toys. BLAH! So, she just got a cute little wallet to hold a gift card and a pair of Christmas toe-socks! DONE! Don't even care anymore. Now I just have 2 adults in the family left to buy for and I can stop thinking about it... except for my BnB nieces/nephews! I can't help myself!

 

[Allie84]

Oh, Hearty, that is just wonderful! What a great opportunity, which I feel was brought into your life via your dad for a reason. I believe all things happen in their due time (even if I do get annoyed when it's not my timing) and it sounds like this consultation was meant to be for you.

I love the readings girls! I'm so mixed as to how I feel about them. They're beautiful (even if sometimes hard to read because she likes run-on sentences, in a sense, lol). Sparkly, that's cool and spooky about your grandma.

Megg, I don't know what measurement the progesterone was in as he didn't write it with my results.

Lucy, aww, that's so sweet you saw someone and thought of me. I hope your day teaching went well? I hope the hoe bag shows up soon. I have the same issue with blood tests this week! Tomorrow will likely be CD1 for me so I will be CD3 on Saturday. I think my family clinic might be open that morning, thankfully, and they can take the blood tests for the hospital.

to everyone else. My dad is back in a hotel tonight. Sigh. I'm trying my best to detach from the situation as there's really nothing I can do. I guess there are worse things than parents splitting up, it's just bizzare after 36 years.

 

[Megg33k]

Aww! I wish you didn't have this stress from your parents, honey! I hope they sort things out soon!!!

 

[heart tree]

Time not working on our time frame sucks! Sorry Gaynor that your reading said you have to wait. As lovely as the readings are, I take them with a grain of salt. I do hope they all come true for everyone though. All of them had healthy babies attached to them.

Megg I'm impressed with your ability to shop so early. And all for $100! Impressive. So did you take your last jerky BCP??? I hope you never have to put another one in your body again.

Allie, what can I say? There is so much going on for you. I think it is good to try and take a step back from your parents' problems. There really is nothing you can do. A split is not imminent. Would they be open to couple's counseling? How awful for all of you.

You need to try not to take on their stress. You need to focus on keeping yourself in a good place (easier said than done). It is up to them to work this out or not. It is up to you to protect yourself so you can focus on your life and your future.

 

[Allie84]

Thanks hearty. It's truly nice to hear that, as when I think those things myself, I feel immensely guilty, but I realize there's only so much I can do for them. I've been counselling them both on the phone since I got home from work, and I'm just drained.

You girls are the only people who know of everything that's going on my life-because not even my parents know about my TTC woes, or even my mc. Only a smattering of friends know about the mc, and no one except my BFF knows about my testing, appointments, etc. They wouldn't even know what a CBFM or OPK were! So, thank you.

 

[heart tree]

Wow Allie, that is really amazing that you are sharing it all with us. I feel honored. You can't be their counselor. You will be put in the middle and torn in half. They need professional help. If you want me to help find someone in that area, I'd be happy to. This is my profession after all.

I just got finished teaching a class today about guilt. I'm going to quote the curriculum: Guilt is what we feel when we act wrongfully or hurtfully toward another or when we believe that we have done so. Guilt is rational when we have actually caused hurt. Guilt is irrational when we falsely perceive that we have acted wrongful or hurtful. As human beings we have an amazing ability to feel guilty when anything goes wrong, wheter or not we are responsible.

Allie, you are NOT responsible for their problems. You do not need to feel guilty.

 

[heart tree]

Girls, I am bawling my eyes out. Is it the Femara? I started crying when my girlfriend sent out a mass email to a bunch of close friends giving an update on her pregnancy and asking us for updates. It was not an insensitive email on her part at all. As I was writing my update, it was all negative. Talking about my diagnosis, my losses. Then I realized today is the 4 year anniversary of my step-father's death. He raised me. My dad toasted him at my wedding. He died a horrible death from dementia and was only 72. He was a brilliant pediatrician. A social activist. A man who wrote to the White House every week to advocate for peace. He walked at the Million Mom March in D.C. I miss him. I just lit a candle for him and put his picture next to it. I don't know if this is my hormones or just my normal emotions.

 

[Megg33k]

Time not working on our time frame sucks! Sorry Gaynor that your reading said you have to wait. As lovely as the readings are, I take them with a grain of salt. I do hope they all come true for everyone though. All of them had healthy babies attached to them.

Megg I'm impressed with your ability to shop so early. And all for $100! Impressive. So did you take your last jerky BCP??? I hope you never have to put another one in your body again.

Allie, what can I say? There is so much going on for you. I think it is good to try and take a step back from your parents' problems. There really is nothing you can do. A split is not imminent. Would they be open to couple's counseling? How awful for all of you.

You need to try not to take on their stress. You need to focus on keeping yourself in a good place (easier said than done). It is up to them to work this out or not. It is up to you to protect yourself so you can focus on your life and your future.

I did take the last one... hopefully the last one ever! I can't wait till tomorrow when its started to make its way out of my body!

Thanks hearty. It's truly nice to hear that, as when I think those things myself, I feel immensely guilty, but I realize there's only so much I can do for them. I've been counselling them both on the phone since I got home from work, and I'm just drained.

You girls are the only people who know of everything that's going on my life-because not even my parents know about my TTC woes, or even my mc. Only a smattering of friends know about the mc, and no one except my BFF knows about my testing, appointments, etc. They wouldn't even know what a CBFM or OPK were! So, thank you.

That's a big burden to carry alone, sweetie! I'm really touched that you share it with us. I can only hope that we can all share in it enough that it makes the load bearable for you!

Girls, I am bawling my eyes out. Is it the Femara? I started crying when my girlfriend sent out a mass email to a bunch of close friends giving an update on her pregnancy and asking us for updates. It was not an insensitive email on her part at all. As I was writing my update, it was all negative. Talking about my diagnosis, my losses. Then I realized today is the 4 year anniversary of my step-father's death. He raised me. My dad toasted him at my wedding. He died a horrible death from dementia and was only 72. He was a brilliant pediatrician. A social activist. A man who wrote to the White House every week to advocate for peace. He walked at the Million Mom March in D.C. I miss him. I just lit a candle for him and put his picture next to it. I don't know if this is my hormones or just my normal emotions.

Aww, Amanda. I don't think its the Femara... I cried reading that. I think you're sad because you have things to be sad about!

Your step-father sounds like an amazing man. I'm really sorry for your loss. Sounds like we all lost a great person when he passed. The wrold needs more people like him! And, I know how horrible dementia is... He deserved much better!

 

[heart tree]

Thanks Megg.

 

[Allie84]

I think it's probably a combination of hormone changes with Femara and the circumstances of today. Your step-father really sounds like an awesome person. He sure lived his life to the fullest, and as he meant to so much to you, it's natural to think about him, and even mourn, on the anniversary of his death. I've cried a few times today myself, thanks PMS. But seriously, thank you for your advice and words of wisdom. It really has helped me to feel better. You and Megg both made me smile, even sigh with relief, and that's quite a feat after my emotional few hours.

 

[heart tree]

Thanks Allie. It feels really good to talk about Paco. He was one of a kind. He was amazing. What I wrote doesn't even cover half of how amazing and giving he was to the world.

I'm glad I could offer you some relief. You deserve it.

I'm glad I have a partner in emotional upheaval tonight. xoxo

 

[yogi77]

aww I'm getting emotional reading these posts...big hugs to you girls, I'm so glad we have eachother

 

[heart tree]

Vicky, I think you have a scan today. Good luck!

 

[Megg33k]

Just popping in before bed for and love to my girls!

 

[vickyd]

I just logged in quickly before i rush off to work.

Hearty you must feel so proud to have been raised by such a man...You being so emotional on the anniversary of his death is perfectly normal. I think you should mourn his loss by celebrating his truely magnificant life. I think we should all inspire to be more like him.

Allie, i agree with Hearty 100%. I to felt guilty for trying to distance myself from my sisters problems but at the end of the day the help she gets from her therapist is 100% more useful than what i do for her. I realised this on Monday when i saw her after her session,she was sooo much better than after we talk.

My scan is today at 5.30....Im stressed as usual but also tired of stressing if ya know what i mean...I feel very drained and cant even gather up enough neurosis for the scan lol....whatever will be

 

[Sparkly]

It's been an emotional night in here.
Hearty - Your step father sounds like a wonderful person, it's not surprising that your feeling emotional on the anniversary of his loss, the world needs more people like him
Allie - I'm sorry to hear of your parents troubles. Try not to take them on board too much, don't put yourself in the middle as they may be able to work it out yet, and you don't need the stress.
Vic - Good luck with your scan chick.

Got my first high on cbfm today.....whoop

 

[Megg33k]

Good luck (that you won't need) at your scan, Vicks! Wave hi to your daughter for us!

Whoop whoop for High, Gaynor!