AMANDAKT512
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Mine has kinda eased up, but crying sure doesn't help
I hope you get some relief soon..
Have a great weekend..
First ivf march 2014! Please join me!
- Thread starter lanet
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Mine has kinda eased up, but crying sure doesn't help
I hope you get some relief soon..
Have a great weekend..
Peachy1584
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Hope you can find some peace with your family issues. I know it's never easy no matter age when we love someone. 
bunyhuny
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After my EC yesterday they gave me ibuprofen for the pain, plus a couple extra hospital strength (800mg) ones to take home with me for later. I would think it's fine if you really need it. I know after transfer it's not supposed to be taken anymore, but that's for baby's sake.
bunyhuny
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Out of 8 eggs, only one fertilized. I am a mess. I don't understand how this could happen. Last cycle we had 18 eggs. 10 IVF, 8 ICSI. The ICSI all dies by day 2 so we went with IVF again this cycle. Last cycle IVF yielded 3 blastocysts from 10 eggs. This cycle we have 8 eggs and at this point, only one embryo. How could this happen????? This is an absolute nightmare. I can't believe this. If the embryo doesn't make it to Monday, that's $9,000 just tossed out the window. I don't understand how this is even possible. We used the exact same protocol as last time. 
Peachy1584
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Buny I don't understand either. Did they tell you last time who they thought the eggs they icsi'd did that? Could the meds somehow be affecting them. I understand your devastation but for now you still have 1 left and I am praying with everything I have that this little one makes it for you.
Peachy1584
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Welcome Gestaur! That's what we're here for is to get/give support its a tough road. The fet is a lot easier though. What an amazing thing you're doing by carrying someone else's baby!
bunyhuny
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They had no idea why ICSI did that last time. Just said that since standard (non-ICSI) IVF did so well, we would go with it again this time. All I can think is that my RE took me off of Metformin saying it is no help if my blood sugar is normal anyway- and now I'm wondering if she was wrong to do that. DH's SA was awful this time, but they said they thought it would be fine since we had such good fertilization last time. I wrote an e-mail to my RE as soon as I got the report, but she hasn't gotten back to me. I still have 9 months worth of Metformin, I may just start taking it again if our embryo doesn't make it. I'm going to get DH on some supplements as well. So far RE said there's nothing to be done for DH, but I am thinking that's BS.
I have no idea ho DH's SA's keep getting worse and worse. Two years ago he had 100mil/mL with normal motility and borderline viscosity, and now he's down to 20mil/mL with low motility and morphology plus the viscosity issue (which in and of itself doesn't mean anything once the sperm have been washed, so that issue is moot).
The only other change that's happened in the last year is we've both lost weight and because of that, my insulin resistance went away. I lost 45 lbs and DH lost 20 lbs. We're still both overweight, but so much better. I really thought that would do a lot to help our situation.
I have no idea ho DH's SA's keep getting worse and worse. Two years ago he had 100mil/mL with normal motility and borderline viscosity, and now he's down to 20mil/mL with low motility and morphology plus the viscosity issue (which in and of itself doesn't mean anything once the sperm have been washed, so that issue is moot).
The only other change that's happened in the last year is we've both lost weight and because of that, my insulin resistance went away. I lost 45 lbs and DH lost 20 lbs. We're still both overweight, but so much better. I really thought that would do a lot to help our situation.
bunyhuny
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HiI'm wondering if its ok if I join in here? We are doing our first FET in March for surrogacy (I'm the surrogate) I'd love to chat with other first timers?
Hey girl! That's awesome you're being a surrogate.
Nothing but well wishes from me. 
Peachy1584
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Yeah I guess you have to wait and see if they think it's a sperm or egg issue. Only the good sperm survive the wash a right? I haven't had to deal with that but I make hubby take a supplement anyways because I had read it could improve quality. Have you had the same RE the whole time?
bunyhuny
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I had one RE up until my first IVF. For IVF we switched to an RE overseas because we couldn't afford IVF in the States. SO we've had the same RE for all of IVF. The first RE was the one who had me on Metformin. My RE here doesn't like Metformin and recommends against it unless there are major insulin issues (which I no longer have).
I just wish I could get some answers! So far, RE is saying that it's all just LUCK. I seriously cannot believe that.
I just wish I could get some answers! So far, RE is saying that it's all just LUCK. I seriously cannot believe that.
Peachy1584
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No I wouldn't accept that either. Would it be possible to email your other RE and get their opinion on all of this? I obviously am no doctor but it doesn't seem right to me either. I mean it could be anything like you said maybe it is the metformin or maybe even a lab issue. Is what they're saying your hubby has a degenerative issue?
bunyhuny
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Our RE hasn't said anything about DH's SA's. I asked, and she keeps saying "luck, luck, luck". I really don't know what to do. We can't afford to go anywhere else, and this clinic is really highly ranked, so.... ???? I just don't know. Maybe after she has the weekend to review things she'll have something else to say. If not, I'm going to see if she'll refer our case to the head RE at the clinic to see if he has any ideas.
We can't ask our previous RE anything. He turned out to be a real jerk and we left his practice on not so great terms. We confronted him on some issues we were having with him being really disrespectful of our beliefs, and he sent us a notarized, certified mail, signature required letter withdrawing his service. Complete weirdo.
We just seem to have no luck with any of this. Diagnoses, RE's, everything just seems to go more and more down hill as time goes by.
We can't ask our previous RE anything. He turned out to be a real jerk and we left his practice on not so great terms. We confronted him on some issues we were having with him being really disrespectful of our beliefs, and he sent us a notarized, certified mail, signature required letter withdrawing his service. Complete weirdo.
We just seem to have no luck with any of this. Diagnoses, RE's, everything just seems to go more and more down hill as time goes by.
Peachy1584
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It's awful you have to go through this. Do you mind if I ask how much cheaper it is there? Do you live there the whole time? I know removing the cells from the egg to do icsi is very delicate and the egg can be ruined. You just never know and what you do know is only what they tell you. Hard to prove anything when you're dealing with things that are microscopic. Putting blind faith in not just one person but an entire clinic is hard and can be very scary.
bunyhuny
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Over here we can do a fresh cycle for airfare ($3000) plus IVF w/blastocyst cultivation and extra embryo vitrification ($6000). So a total of around $9000 (give or take changes in airfare of anything extra that comes up.
This cycle will be cheaper since we won't freeze and won't cultivate past 3 days- so only $4500 including meds for the cycle. That takes the entire excess cost to our budget $7500 for this cycle. If we had had a normal cycle, we would have stayed out here for a FET (had we had embryos to freeze), so that wouldn't have even cost airfare again since we'd already be here....
A frozen cycle here is airfare ($3000) plus only $650 for u/s and transfer.
In the US, I was quoted $14,000 plus the cost of meds for a fresh cycle, $5000 for a frozen, so it is a pretty big savings. We sold our house to pay for our first cycle of IVF and put a downpayment on an RV, and our rent here costs about the same as our mortgage payments, so there is no additional living cost. When we are back in the US we live in our RV at a campground (RV payment plus camp ground is about half what our mortgage cost used to be).
Still, I really do wish we could afford to pay OOP for US IVF. I would give anything to have my home back and my life back. We can afford IVF here, but it is no life for us.
This cycle will be cheaper since we won't freeze and won't cultivate past 3 days- so only $4500 including meds for the cycle. That takes the entire excess cost to our budget $7500 for this cycle. If we had had a normal cycle, we would have stayed out here for a FET (had we had embryos to freeze), so that wouldn't have even cost airfare again since we'd already be here....
A frozen cycle here is airfare ($3000) plus only $650 for u/s and transfer.
In the US, I was quoted $14,000 plus the cost of meds for a fresh cycle, $5000 for a frozen, so it is a pretty big savings. We sold our house to pay for our first cycle of IVF and put a downpayment on an RV, and our rent here costs about the same as our mortgage payments, so there is no additional living cost. When we are back in the US we live in our RV at a campground (RV payment plus camp ground is about half what our mortgage cost used to be).
Still, I really do wish we could afford to pay OOP for US IVF. I would give anything to have my home back and my life back. We can afford IVF here, but it is no life for us.
bunyhuny
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Oh, and as far as living here. Yes, we live here the entire cycle and TWW. DH works from home for a company out of San Francisco under a special arrangement. He is a software engineer so he web-commutes to work each day. If we didn't live here the whole time, we'd have to fly back and forth and the expense would just be crazy.
It does get complicated though because Europe only allowed visits for 90 days per 6 months, so we have to be really careful how we schedule things. If this cycle ends as badly as it is looking it might, we may have to more to the UK for a month to wait for our next cycle. They are considered a separate passport/visa region from the rest of Europe, so we go there when we have to take time off between cycles but can't afford to fly back to the US and back to Prague again.
It is really, really complicated.
It does get complicated though because Europe only allowed visits for 90 days per 6 months, so we have to be really careful how we schedule things. If this cycle ends as badly as it is looking it might, we may have to more to the UK for a month to wait for our next cycle. They are considered a separate passport/visa region from the rest of Europe, so we go there when we have to take time off between cycles but can't afford to fly back to the US and back to Prague again.
It is really, really complicated.
Peachy1584
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Wow you have given up so much. Let's not give up hope on the little embryo you still have growing. In the meantime you may want to start searching different US clinics. I have had people tell me similar costs to what you are paying and with the advantage of the RV you'd be able to travel anywhere. It may also be beneficial to look into trial programs clinics are offering perhaps you would qualify for one. Also if you do not already have children there are grants you can apply for and thanks to Lanet I was able to get half off my follistim through a program she told me about.
bunyhuny
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Thanks, Peachy. I will have to do more research into studies. Sadly, most of the studies I've found I don't qualify for because of my weight. I gained 110 lbs when I quit smoking in 2010-11 in preparation for TTC *facepalm*, and though I lost 40 in 2013, I still need to lose another 60 before I'm not classified as overweight. If you know of any studies that take women with higher BMI's, please, please, please let me know! That would be an amazing thing to find.
You are right about looking at other clinics. We haven't had a chance to do much of that. I know of a couple clinics in New Jersey that are cheaper, but we can't take the RV north in the winter months due to pipes freezing. We may have to look into that option for the summer.
We're also unsure of what the future holds as far as housing goes. The RV has been working the last year, but it is starting to not be the best for us. 2 people living in 350 sq ft isn't bad for short term stays in the US, but I don't think we can live like that for months on end. We've done a two month stretch once now, and it was cutting it close on our sanity.
DH is talking about moving back to California where his current employers are and plead with them for a raise to cover California IVF. I am really, really hoping they will agree.
You are right about looking at other clinics. We haven't had a chance to do much of that. I know of a couple clinics in New Jersey that are cheaper, but we can't take the RV north in the winter months due to pipes freezing. We may have to look into that option for the summer.
We're also unsure of what the future holds as far as housing goes. The RV has been working the last year, but it is starting to not be the best for us. 2 people living in 350 sq ft isn't bad for short term stays in the US, but I don't think we can live like that for months on end. We've done a two month stretch once now, and it was cutting it close on our sanity.
DH is talking about moving back to California where his current employers are and plead with them for a raise to cover California IVF. I am really, really hoping they will agree.
