First ivf march 2014! Please join me!

[messica]

Yay Breaking!!!!!


Question for you all.....before retrieval doc came in and said based on my estrogen levels we were probably looking at only about 5 eggs. Came to, to her letting us know she had gotten **11** Anyone know what that might mean? I'm thrilled to have gotten more than we ever anticipated but now I'm concerned that might indicate poor quality. She said they looked great on first glance but how can there be more than twice as many with such low estrogen? Does estrogen indicate quality? Or is that just because I had more eggs in each follicle?

I was too far out of it to think that much in the moment. A bit sore but not too bad, and now of course the gears are turning at rapid speed. Will get first report from embryologist Monday but it's going to be hard to wait that long.....

 

[Peachy1584]

Messica it's not necessarily about quality or the egg being bad it's about maturity. For instance my first cycle we got 16 eggs which was more than expected but 10 were mature. Your estrogen levels generally correlate with how many mature eggs you have but of course that varies from woman to woman as well. I think it's around 200 per mature egg. This cycle we got 9 eggs and 5 were mature. Now when I say this I am not trying to sound crass and I hope you know that but usually you'd want a lot of eggs for more embryos because you want to have some to freeze. Since you aren't doing that even if you end up with 5 mature you'll still have a couple of great ones for transfer which is all you really want anyways right? I am so happy for you though that you made it through and now you can relax a bit before transfer. I wouldn't worry at all about your embryo report as like I say you'll have a couple for transfer no matter what : )

 

[Peachy1584]

A friend of mine just reminded me that her e2 was over 4000 and she had poor quality eggs that cycle. With everything ivf you just never know I guess.

 

[messica]

Not crass at all peachy, that makes perfect sense and when docs office called just a bit ago to check how i was feeling they said it's hard to know exactly why my numbers were what they were but thats also what they suspect. Likely more mature than not. Its once again a waiting game to sort out the details.

Hubs is having a bit of a change of heart on freezing it seems. He asked for the consent forms to review and we have until transfer to decide. The idea of going through all this again bothers him tremendously, as does the idea of it not being successful. He may or may not come around but when he heard how inexpensive and far less invasive a frozen cycle is this morning by comparison he definitely changed his tune.

God bless chatty nurses lol

 

[Breaking Dawn]

Thanks so much ladies.

I'm feeling exhausted today and have some cramps pokes and pinches going on.

 

[Peachy1584]

Messica I truly hope he changes his mind if you do have the opportunity to freeze any. It's not only cheaper but way easier on your body and they can be babies if either unsuccessfully or for a sibling later. I can understand not wanting them just hanging around but I'm not sure if I can find a difference in between "discarding " them as they say now or after they've been frozen.

 

[lanet]

That makes sense peachy. They are already embryos. That would be awesome if he changed his mind Messica. Id be scared to let them go before I got my bfp. I'm glad your retrieval went well! It would be so hard to wait all weekend for the results but it will be here before you know it!
I'm having a hard time at work. I know it's totally me being sensitive but I've started not being able to stand most of the girls here. I feel like they are superficial and after dealing with something like infertility I realized I don't have room for that, that's not what matters in life. They also talk about babies/pregnancy 24/7 and I block it out mostly but can only take so much! I've basically stopped talking to a couple of them, and there's only 7 of us here so it can be awkward. When it comes time to do something all together I just want to say no. I don't want to be bitter but I think it's too late they know I've been ttc but don't know about ivf and I would never tell them. I don't know what to do.

 

[Morana]

Id be scared to let them go before I got my bfp.

That's how I feel too. We've decided to freeze ours if any make it to freezing stage. Hopefully he changes his mind, Messica!

Lanet - sorry to hear that. I really don't know what to say though... I tried to keep my own IVF under wraps too and I work in the department full of women, but I guess I'm lucky... Some of the ladies I work with never had children either by choice or circumstance and the ones that do have enough sense not to discuss it endlessly. Now I appreciate them more

afm - feeling stressed today. For no particular reason either, nothing changed since yesterday but I today I feel like nothing worked and it'll be a bust Looks like tww is here full force. Also I have to wait till Mon do hear if any of 4 embies I had in extended culture made it to freezing, that adds to the stress. I'd feel much better if I knew I had some frosties... oh, well. Nothing to do now but wait

 

[teamstanlick]

Congratulations Breaking. What a wonderful sight!

As for me, my line has progressively gotten lighter and lighter on day 7 and day 8 P5DT, so I'm worried that means another chemical...thoughts?

 

[Peachy1584]

Morana the 2ww is torture and one thing I learned is that my negative cycle felt no different than my positive. Hang in there and try to keep busy best you can. Could you order showtime and watch Jimmy? : )

Team are you using the same brand test? I know those lines are evil hon and I can totally feel your pain

Lanet aren't all hair stylists superficial? OK ok jokes aside I know how hard it is to deal with others when you're going through something so difficult and everything else seems so trivial. The gal that normally does my hair has a now 4 month old boy and while she was in the early stages she'd say things like " I only want a boy and it had better be a boy" she would bitch about her husband not being into it at all and it was so obvious she wasn't either. What happened to just wanting a happy healthy baby?I tried hard when she came back from maternity leave to get an appt on a day she didn't work. Just keep everything impersonal and chat about the weather if you have to. I work in a restaurant remember? Although of course because of my position they're all nice to me even though I know they wouldn't be if I were just another employee and that makes me nauseous as well. I would rather have people be authentic. I pity them sometimes.

 

[lanet]

I'm debating telling them bc I'm wondering if me having a secret is making me seem more distant and bitchy. But I seriously don't think I can trust them with the info. Then if one of them got pregnant accidentally I would feel so stupid. They do know I've been trying for a long time and they still come to me and say shit like "I think I might be pregnant, my boobs hurt" even though they aren't pregnant and they don't say it to anyone else! They also make sure to tell me when so and so is accidentally pregnant. That seems insensitive to me, or maybe I'm just so highly sensitive. But it's causing a serious rift. Better to be able to pretend it doesn't bother me I guess. I do try to keep things impersonal, but all day I hear stories coming from each chair, not only my clients. A client was recently in and she has a 1 year old and then just had twins...accidentally! And her husband cried when they told them bc he didn't want that many! And THEN she named one my boy name Oliver. I had to hear her whole birth story. And I just had to keep a poker face. It's so very difficult. I know if I do tell one person I have to be prepared for them all to know. Sometimes I want to quit and become a hermit. Lol. Just can't this stage on my life be over already?!
Team I really hope it's not a chemical, you've had one before? Could it be urine is more diluted or something?

 

[Peachy1584]

I wish I could quit too that's why I play that stupid publishers clearing house crap. Oh what I could do with $7,000 a week. I wouldn't tell them if I were you. It's hard enough with people you love that love you. Others just don't understand and I don't want you to be even more hurt if they continue saying insensitive things actually knowing what's going on with you. Or worse trying to be careful with everything they say like you can't handle/deal with things. People are Assholes : ) . I wonder why it autocorrected that word to capitalize it. Hmm maybe autocorrect agrees : ). Maybe make a bigger effort to tune them out and keep your eyes on the prize. I have a little cartoon I keep trying to put on here and am having trouble and here I thought it figured out humph!

 

[Peachy1584]

 

[lanet]

Haha that's so cute!
And true words peachy, thanks. I just want to come back from vacay pregnant and not tell them until I give birth!

 

[teamstanlick]

Cute cartoon!

As for me, I've been using FRER with first morning urine, so...it's not looking good. The line is pretty much completely gone this morning at 9DP5DT...

Go in for my BETA tomorrow, so I guess I will see.
Yes, I've had two chemical pregnancies, I just don't know why I can't hold onto my babies? This is my third pregnancy and my third chemical...

On the bright side...it's been well over two years since I saw a line on an HPT, so that's progress I think.

 

[Peachy1584]

Team I am so very sorry for your loss. Yes it is a loss and it hurts. I have had so many struggles with those lines. It seems so impossible to wait for your beta so we torture ourselves with those sticks. Of course you won't know for absolute certainty until tomorrow but if you're right I hope you are able to continue trying. Have you done all sorts of testing to try to find out what the issue may be? If your beta comes back negative make sure to tell your RE (not just the nurses that call you) that you did have positive tests. The unfortunate thing is that without testing for everything you never know if it was an issue with implantation or an issue with the embryo. For me it seems to be my embryos and we're just searching for the right one.

 

[Seoul]

team- So sorry to hear that. I hope you get some answers soon

Lanet- that has to be torture hearing your clients and co workers talk about things like that. Your a trooper.

AFM-had a bit of a scare yesterday I went to the zoo yesterday and went I went to the rest room I had a bit of red on my progesterone discharge (sorry tmi) It was only the tiny bit and haven't had any more but it really freaked me out as I have also had salmon colored discharge for days now but it is only the progesterone discharge everything else is clear . Its hard to not get bitter of women who never had any issues conceiving and keeping the pregnancy. Guess more waiting and hoping.

 

[Breaking Dawn]

TeamS...I'm so sorry I've had a chemical and it is such a sad feeling of loss. Hang in there....

Seoul...I've been having cramps ever since I tested and I worry when I go pee that I'm going to see red discharge too....

AFM ....tomorrow is 9dpt and I'm going in for my beta. Praying for good numbers....to put my mind at ease.

 

[Seoul]

Breaking- good luck tomorrow hope you have fabulous numbers! Have you POAS again too see how dark the line is?

 

[lanet]

So sorry team
Good luck tomorrow breaking.
Seoul I'm sure everything is fine, when is your scan?