First Time Mom's - Due March/April 2013

[LiverpoolLass]

Hi girls!

It feels like forever since I posted on here - its probably only been a few days lol.

I have been really unwell the last few days - I collapsed in the bathroom on Saturday morning.
Typically it was the ONE day I was totally on my own and Tyne started screaming in his crib just as it happened - my Aunts boyfriend lives across the road and he had to come over and rescue me, so embarrassing.

Since then I've barely been able to get out of bed - just exhausted all the time, all my bones are aching, I have a constant headache - just feel awful. I saw the Dr today and he blamed it on my iron count which is now at 8 apparently (A normal iron count is apparently around 16) but he's also sending me for a fasting blood test tomorrow to check for diabetes. I doubt I have that though...

So I've read through the posts but my memory is shocking atm, so apologies if I miss anything...

Lauren - congrats on the house news! Thats exciting! I'm glad its worked out in the end.
Tyne still goes in his beanbag to sleep of a day, he still seems quite happy in it. He's gone right off the rock n play though.

Lyndsey - Sarah is so cute! Its shocking that people ask if shes a girl or a boy but it doesnt surprise me as some people seem to be absolutely thick when it comes to determining a babies gender.
Some batty old woman asked me the other day if Tyne was a boy or a girl - he was dressed head to foot in blue, and was laying in blue & white pram - errrrm what do you think?!!!!!
Mind you someone once asked my sister what sex her baby was - and she was wearing a big headband with a massive pink flower on at the time!!! Crazy people.

Sarah - Did you enjoy the big reunion concert? I'm jealous, I'd love to have gone to that!! lol.
I'm glad Simon & Izzy survived well without you!
As for clothes, I've boxed up all the older stuff - we have a huge box of 3-6 months, a box full of combined older sizes (6-9 and 9-12 months and a few 12-18 months lol). I want it just out of the way as his drawers and hangers are already bursting at the seams with his current clothes, theres no room for anything else!

Brittany - I'm so sorry to hear about your cousins husband. I totally understand your feelings on the subject - my own cousin committed suicide a few years ago leaving behind a young wife and their children who were 4 and 2 at the time. I found it very difficult to feel sad for him, I just felt very angry at how selfish he was and very sad for his wife and especially for his children having to grow up knowing that their father chose to leave them. Its a horrible, horrible situation.

 

[doggylover]

Hayley the reason I was given a blood transfusion after labour is because my iron count was just around 7- so yours is VERY low!! Sorry to hear you are feeling so awful, get swallowing the iron tablets and rest up.

Brittany I'm so sorry to hear about your cousins husband. I read your blog, and I totally understand why you feel confused and upset for your cousin

Lauren gosh you must clean your oven a lot to rub the numbers off! I am TERRIBLE about cleaning ours, it's criminal how little I do it!!

How is everyone's LO at the minute? Sleeping well I hope, and not being too fussy.

Isabelle has had a dodgy day today no idea what the problem has been, but Mae something to do with the huge amount she sucked up. Absolutely LOADS. So much it actually pooled in the bum part of her bouncer, and she was soaked through to her nappy with it. That rendered her bouncer inactive for the rest of the day, and she only really naps in it during the day so she wasnt sleeping well in her Moses basket which just compounded her fussiness.

She settled well enough tonight after a bit of a grizzle, but she self soothed which I was pleased with. She isn't feeding to sleep much anymore at bed time, so she needs to start self soothing more quickly! Last night she slept a 4.5hr then a 3hr stretch which took us until 5.15am, which was great. I'm hoping for something similar tonight!

We also went to a breastfeeding group today. I've been meaning to go for weeks, but this week was the first time we got round to it. The other girls all knew one another pretty well, but it was nice jus to get out and do something different and have a quick chat with other mums. Also got Izzy weighed - she's now 10lb 6oz. My Mum called her a "porker" yesterday

 

[linzylou]

Brittany, I wrote more in your journal but I just want to say again that my thoughts are with your family at this time.

Hayley, I'm sorry you're feeling so unwell these days. Collapsing in the bathroom? That seems so scary! Like Sarah said, take those iron pills and rest up1 I hope you feel better soon.

Sarah, I'd love to check out a breastfeeding group, if even to meet other moms in the area. I need more "mom" friends. Izzy's weight sounds perfect! She's not a porker, she's healthy! Sarah was 10 lbs 4 oz (90% percentile) at her one month checkup and I was so relieved. I'm sure she's around 12-13 lbs now! I hate when people make negative comments about a baby's weight. I looked like the Michelin man when I was a baby and I've never weighed more than 110 lbs in my adult life (aside from pregnancy)!

As for me, I'm at my wit's end. Sarah's been eating/sleeping like a newborn the last 2 days. Eating every 1-2, cluster feeding from 6-10 every evening. I've gotten about 6 hours of sleep in the last 2 days. It just sucks because I'm nursing so often that when she's done, instead of playing with her I just want to set her down so I can have a break. I've tried distracting her and can sometimes hold her off for about 30 minutes but then she starts fussing and won't stop until I put her back on the boob. Also, her latch is not very good all of a sudden. I have to re-latch her multiple times during a session.

Seth's trying to say that I'm not producing enough milk and that I need to start topping her off with formula (especially at night) but I can't bring myself to do that as much as I am getting sick of sitting around with my boobs out all day/night long. I hope this is just a phase that ends soon because I'm going crazy!!

We have Sarah's 2 month checkup tomorrow. I'll definitely mention her recent eating/sleeping habits. I'm soo not excited for her vaccines tomorrow, poor baby.

 

[doggylover]

Oh Lindsey good luck with Sarah's shots! I hope neither of you get too upset.

And no you don't need to top her up with formula. Like you said, it's a phase and she will (literally!) grow out of it. I hope that happens soon so that you can get a bit more of a break.

Isabelle was a champ last night and slept for 6hrs 15mins! I think she would have one longer but she did a HUGE poo, which I knew I couldn't leave her in for more than a minute, so I got her up, and she had a quick snack after her change then fell asleep again. I wonder how much longer she would have gone......I hope I find out tonight!

 

[linzylou]

Great job, Isabelle!! I hope it continues.

I'm the only one left whose baby isn't sleeping. 3am here. We've been up every hour since 11. I'm not sure why this is happening but it has me in tears. I've tried everything I've read about to get her to sleep but she seems to only want to catnap. Definitely bringing this up at her appointment today as this is Day 3 of hardly any sleep.

I'm feeling bitter towards my husband, as well, since he went out with friends tonight and is now snoring away.

 

[doggylover]

one good night for us doesn't mean that we are in the clear! So don't feel like you are the only one.

And what Seth did would really piss me off as well. I would probably have smothered him in his sleep, or at the very least give him a good kicking. I hope she sleeps better for the rest of the night

 

[linzylou]

I'm sobbing my eyes out. She was up 5x total during the night and is up for good at 5:30. It's Seth's turn now but we have our appointment this morning so I don't have much of a chance to sleep. One of my biggest fears was that my baby would be a terrible sleeper. I hope the pediatrician has some suggestions because I'm so exhausted that I'm finding it hard to enjoy playing with her during the day.

 

[MrsHippo]

Lindsey, I am so sorry to hear about your sleepless night. I think its a phase too. Beau was a nightmare all last week, then this week she has been better on the crying front but wants feeding every 2 hours instead of 4 and last night she had her last feed at 10/10:30 then up at 2, 4 and 7. I couldn't sleep when I first went to bed last night so I think I was up until midnight(ish) so felt like a zombie this morning. But the night before last, she slept around 7 hours. I don't understand. And as Sarah said about the BF, don't give her forumla if you aren't happy to do so. You will always produce enough milk for Sarah. One day you might choose to give her forumla but you have to make that decision, don't let Seth encourage you to as you'll only regret it. I'm not surprised your angry with Seth either, it makes me so angry when the men are like that. The other night (bare in mind Adam was and will be working away all week, every week for a while), Beau woke up and I had to wake Adam up to see to her (we discussed before bed that he would deal with her as I have done it all by myself) and he was falling back to sleep then he said 'do you want to do it' WHAT!!!! I was angry with him then and made him get up to her. It really makes my blood boil when they try and fob everything off to us.

Sarah, your comment made me laugh 'smothered him in his sleep' that isn't nice of your mum to say that she is a porker. Her weight sounds fine to me. We have the health visitor on Friday so Beau will be getting weighed then. I find that I am putting more and more clothes in to a box that she has grown out of I am excited to get her in to some nice clothes that are the size bigger but I am sad that she is growing up already

Hayley, I can't believe you collapsed. I hope your feeling better soon. Surely they have to do something for you soon, its not fair that you have to go through that as well as be a mum to a newborn. I find it exhausting as it is, never mind feeling lousy too.

So today we put our bond down on the house yey We won't be moving until the first week of July though. It can't come quick enough!!

 

[MrsHippo]

Oh and I nearly cried at the hospital today. Beau had her ultrasound (for her hip) and I popped in to the changing room to pop her bottoms back on. When we finished, another baby started crying and Beau pulled the bottom lip and started crying herself. Once the baby had stopped, she did too. I started welling up, poor thing!!

 

[MrsHippo]

Third post in one night - need to vent!!!

So I took the sealant off the bath the other night so I could re-do it, as it was a right mess before. I've been busy though so haven't got around to re-doing it. Well tonight I thought I'd do it once Beau was in bed.

So got started, Beau kept moaning because she had dropped her dummy but I knew she'd want more food as she hardly had any before bed. Well half way through she was still crying so I was going to feed her quickly then finish it off. I had a bit of sealant on my hand and in a rush I went to wash it off - big mistake, it spread all over both hands and I couldn't get it off. Beau was screaming at this point and I was trying everything to get it off my hands but it was just getting worse. Eventually using a dry towel, managed to get most off and got her out and fed her. She thankfully settled back down. But 1. I feel awful about having to leave her crying, I never intended to get it all over my hands and not be able to clean it off. 2. I feel upset that I can't just seal the bath anymore... 3. I need to do her bottles for the night and don't want to touch the teats now because I have this shit all over me and I am worried it will cause some problem if it gets on the teat and in her mouth. 4. I go back in to the bathroom to discover it has started to dry and now the whole thing needs taking off and starting again. I was in tears at this point. Then to top the whole thing off!! I text Adam to tell him what I had done and that I felt really bad for having to leave Beau crying and all I got from him was 'it didn't need doing in the first place' ectect then when I said 'thanks for making me feel loads better' he put '' I'm not sitting here sugar coating you '' .... I was literally crying my eyes out because of how bad I felt and how upset I was about the fact that I can't just seal the bath anymore or do anything else for that matter!! and he goes and says that!!!!!! I feel as though my life has completely changed and can't do anything I want to anymore- even if it is just re-sealing the bath BECAUSE I WANT TO ....yet he can f*ing live his life as he used to!!!!!!

My god. I feel awful. I can't stop crying and I am really really angry at the same time. I feel so shitty I've turned my phone off because I don't want to speak to him or see anymore sarcastic texts from him.

 

[doggylover]

Lindsey I am so sorry you had such a shitty night. Did you talk with your pedi about Sarah's sleep? What did they say? It's only natural that you are exhausted during the day when getting such little sleep. Can you ask your mum or someone to watch Sarah for a few hours tomorrow to try and catch up on sleep? Hopefully if you can you would feel more ready to face her awake time during the day

Lauren, Adam was a total ass to say that. Why do men not understand that we don't just do housework when it NEEDS done, we do it to kind of prevent it getting to that stage?? I am continually impressed, I have to say, with your handiness around the house! Sealing a bath, you mentioned you painted your bedroom before...you're a DIY goddess!
I think I know how you feel about the not being able to do what you want part.

Last night and tonight when I put Isabelle down, it's taken at least 30mins to settle her and actually get her to sleep. Tonight it was 50mins. Most nights it's around 15/20. Well, tonight that meant I didn't finish with her until 9.20, and since I got to bed around 10.30 that meant I have literally one hour to myself ALL day. I cried as well tonight.
Simon did offer to settle her, but i knew it would only be boob that did the trick. And all I could think during that final feed was that I would have one hour to myself before bedtime, then I'm up during the night while Simon sleeps, then I'm with her all day, and when he comes home he makes dinner to help out, but I have to watch her then, and then after dinner it's time to start her bedtime. I literally have zero time to myself. When she is napping I am showering quickly, cleaning the house, walking the dogs with her in the pram, or we're out somewhere. I love her of course, but it would be nice to just have a few hours to myself to do nothing. Since she won't take a bottle that's pretty much impossible right now

The men justdo not get that we are with these babies ALLL DAY LONG and that it can be very very hard.

Seems like we are all having a shitty day.

 

[MrsHippo]

It is hard. I think our lives change so much more then the men's and I don't think they realise that. I was just talking to Adam and he thinks him working away is why I'm annoyed... Yes I wish he was at home to help out. But when he is home he spends most of his time doing what he pleases, whether that be watching something on his iPad, on computer or playing on the playstation. Oh and his running he suddenly decided he has to do. Yes I go on the laptop or sit here on my phone but as soon as Beau needs something, I'm there. When I'm not dealing with her, I'm cleaning or whatever. Adam doesn't do that. He will do bottles or the dishwasher but I don't recall him ever just getting the hoover out or cleaning up.

And after me ranting on about how shit I feel and said how I feel about him going to Ibiza, he still didn't say anything. I swear I'd get through to a brick wall better than him sometimes.

I now have swollen eyes and a headache. Great. I can see Beau being up a couple of times tonight as she has decided not to drink much milk this evening.

I don't think any of us are having a good week either *sigh*

 

[doggylover]

What you said about Adam is the same as I feel about Simon exactly. In fairness, Simon does do stuff around the house if he is asked, and he has been cooking dinner most nights and cleaning up afterwards, putting the nappies in the wash too. And I know that's helpful, and he thinks its helpful, but there is so much more that needs done around the house every day! Men + cleaning clearly does not = success!

So we had a shitty night. She slept until 1.30, then was up at 3.30, 5 and 6. So I am super tired today. We were going to go to a baby group but haven't the energy to rush out of the house, especially since she's grumpy today.

 

[doggylover]

Simon just sent me a text saying "I'm leaving work early so will meet you at your parents. Bring some frozen breast milk (actually I paraphrased that. He calls it "booby juice") so your dad and I can look after Isabelle for a few hours and you can do whatever you want."

I love the idea that I will have something to do during those hours that doesn't involve cleaning the house.......

 

[MrsHippo]

Aww thats nice of him to suggest that. I haven't had any offers from Adam like that. My mum has offered to help so I can have time to myself but its not the same is it.

I didn't have a great night. Beau however, did. I went to bed around 11/11:30 but couldn't sleep, I didn't check the time as that always makes it worse. When I did fall asleep I kept waking up. Beau woke up at 4ish but when I got up to her she had fallen back to sleep, then was up for a feed at 5 then again at 7:30ish. So I feel a bit lousy this morning. And because I was cying last night, my eyes are all puffy today - great...I am going out to meet my mum at lunch time too so I hope they go down by then!!

I need to catch up on my housework, I can see mess everywhere which is irritating me but whenever I attempt to do it Beau needs me. When she is napping I try and cram as much in as I can...but it all builds back up again.

I need a money tree at the moment. So much money has to go out....I am going to have to become a house hermit soon!! At least when we move out I have a garden I can sit out in I am sooo looking forward to that. I am more excited about having a garden then moving in to an actual house. I'll post a link up actually of the house, they aren't photos of its current state, these are from when it was up for sale end of last year. I posted photos of the view on fb the other day.

https://www.zoopla.co.uk/property-history/32-green-lane/lambley/nottingham/ng4-4qe/19011219

 

[doggylover]

Oh my gosh Lauren that is GORGEOUS!! I really love the kitchen, and the garden looks massive - lots of space for Beau to play both inside and outside. Is it furnished or will you be needing a huge shopping trip?!

Glad Beau slept well, but sorry you didn't. Get some cucumbers on the eyes

 

[MrsHippo]

It is unfurnished....so yes, shopping trip is in order lol. The only thing we will be buying straight away is a washing machine. It has a fridge and freezer but not a fridge freezer...if that makes sense?? I will eventually buy a dishwasher too. I don't think I can live without one!!

But yes it is very cosy location makes it though, shame the area is so expensive as I'd like to buy there one day. You don't get much for your money at all. I quite look forward to the winters as every room has a real fire

 

[linzylou]

It looks like we're all in need of massive hugs this week!

Lauren, I'm so sorry that Adam was insensitive. I would have been in tears after that ordeal, too. You're doing an amazing job being on your own so much throughout the week.

I love the cottage! I like the wooden beams on the ceiling and the conservatory (I think?) with all of the windows. Love the view, as well.

Sarah, that was nice of Simon! You deserve some time to yourself! I'm sorry Isabelle didn't sleep well for you. I don't understand how they can have a good night and then a bad night the next. Fingers crossed that the good soon outnumber the bad!

I think part of Sarah's problem is that she's been getting too much daytime sleep. I was under the impression that "sleep begets sleep" and that she shouldn't be awake for more than 1.5-2 hours at a time. Maybe she's outgrown that rule as she's almost 10 weeks now. She does sleep well during the day...too well, obviously. How much daytime sleep are your babies getting?

Tonight we did the unthinkable. We moved Sarah's bassinet into her own room. We did our normal routine of boob, bath, quiet time, boob in her room with the lights off, and then bed at 7:45. Seth gave her a bottle at 10pm, and I just fed her at 4am. She has been asleep the entire time. Unfortunately I haven't slept more than 2.5 hours because I've been glued to the video monitor but I'm really, really surprised. Seth snores, I toss and turn, sometimes Seth and I have whispered conversations, and our room gets all of the morning sun (sunrise is 5:30) so I wonder if all of that has been contributing to Sarah's poor sleep. She seems content in her room, she has her white noise machine but it's quiet otherwise, it's dark even in the morning... Also, I've watched her grunt and squirm and then put herself right back to sleep without crying several times tonight when I would have probably picked her up had she been next to me. She only let out one wail about 4am and I fed her immediately and then it's been back to sleep ever since.

We ended up rescheduling our doctor's appointment for later this week but I did call about the sleep and he's actually the one who suggested we try her in her own room. I'm very lonely without her next to me and have cried a few times tonight but it does make me happy to see that she can in fact sleep during the night. Almost 8 hours total so far with 2 feeds! Of course, this could totally be a fluke and I've learned not to get my hopes up but still.

 

[MrsHippo]

Awww Lindsey, perhaps the bad nights were due you seeing to her when she makes noise or Seth snoring. I have got up to Beau so many times thinking she has woken up but when I get to her hammock she is fast asleep. I still have her in my bedroom at night, mainly because her hammock stand doesn't fit in her room. Saying that actually, we took the stand down when we had a viewing last and I haven't put it back up. She hangs from the door frame instead...so is slowly moving out lol. She does however, sleep in her moses basket in her room during the day and she is more than happy in there.

She doesn't sleep for very long during the day, probably half an hour usually but she has to go down around every 2 hours or she gets really ratty. Unless we go out...when she is out in her pushchair she sleeps for hours. I went out to see my mum at half 12, got back about 3 and she fell asleep shortly after leaving home and is still asleep now. I find that she sleeps better at night when she has slept properly in the day, when she hardly has any, she can be ratty at night.

There is lots of noise around here usually, either from the tv, washing machine, cars (we live on a busy road) or our new, very noisy neighbours....so I hope she is ok when we move to the quietness of the countryside!! It will be strange for me, I have always lived in busy built up areas....

My mum's husband brought Beau a Steiff bear, well donkey...I'll post a photo. They are collectables and Rhys has a whole cabinet full of them!! But he decided that he wanted to buy Beau one and its really sweet.

Oh and we have a moving date - 5th July

 

[doggylover]

Ok, so what Simon ACTUALLY meant by his amazing sounding message was "I will come up to your dads and spend 3hrs sorting stuff out and not even look twice at Isabelle. I text your dad earlier to tell him that you are exhausted and unable to look after your own child all day, so he will look after her this afternoon. I know he is also looking after Jacob - who is two and a total live wire- but he can easily manage both."

I am so so cross. In the end the amount of time I got to myself this afternoon amounted to ZERO. I was at my parents, and Simon arrived, said hi, then disappeared to sort out stuff he is storing there for work. My dad kept saying he would take Isabelle, and I know he would, but I just felt like it was such an imposition since he already had Jacob who is very lively. And since I didn't know it was supposed to actually be my dad looking after Isabelle I felt awful. Plus my dad kept saying it must have been a terrible night if I was so tired that Simon text him, so I just felt like basically a crap mother. So instead of getting any time to myself (I had imagined Simon would maybe take 45mins to sort stuff out then take Isabelle) I ended up sitting by myself with her as my dad was running round after Jacob. And she was in CRAP form and kept crying every time I tried to put her down. Simon did appear and offer to take her up to where he was working, but since she wouldn't be put down how would that work?

So now I am doubly exhausted, pissed off and worst of all is I know Simon still thinks he did some great thing this afternoon. And if I say any of this to him he'll get upset. in fairness he has now taken her out with the dogs so I will have half an hours peace.

lindsey I'm so glad Sarah slept better last night. I remember the first night we put Isabelle upstairs in the evening I was glued to the monitor, but since then I barely glance at it - hopefully that will be you tonight! Poor Sarah, she's obviously been kept awake by you two being too noisy I also rush to Isabelle as soon as she fusses at night, I think it's only natural to have done that.

Lauren not long now then until the move!! You'll be manic trying to get packed and get everything bought in the next few weeks. I can't wait to see how you decorate Beaus room, it's going to be lovely I am sure! And that is a gorgeous teddy, lucky Beau!

Daytime sleep: don't even talk to me about this at the minute. For some reason Isabelle is barely sleeping at all during the day. She used to do 2-3hr stretches, especially in the morning, but now I'm lucky to get an hr out of her. Then of course she's grumpy. Like with Beau, if we're out or she's in her pram when we're walking the dogs she sleeps no problem, but at home, nothing doing. Add to this the fact that she refuses to sleep in her Moses basket unless she is dead to the world when you put her in, and it makes day naps more and more difficult. She only naps in her bouncer and that isn't going to able to last forever.

Tallying it up, I'd say she does maybe 6hrs sleep between 8am and 8pm, 7hrs at a push. Then she does around 7hrs at night (broken by feeds and her stupidness from 5am onwards)