General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[shaescott]

Dobs I’m so sorry
Congrats on 3 weeks sober! My dad has been sober for 6 years, it’s totally possible to beat and I know you can do it. Sending love

 

[DobbyForever]

TY Shae. I have a lot of friends who drink excessively. One admits she’s so alcoholic but she functions and just accepts that she can’t stop drinking. The other just never grew out partying. It’s hard because they are supportive, but so much of our time together is drinking so they don’t ask how I am. It’s always oh you’re still not drinking? When are you going to drink? What are you mixing with your apple juice? I miss drinking with you. It’s a little taxing. Like I can be just as fun and present enjoying a juice or a soda.

Idk. I love cocktails. They’re delicious. I think if my friends could genuinely be ok with me having just one drink then it’d be different. But like they will badger or order drinks for me then guilt me even when I say I have to go pick up A in a few hours. Then I end up having to call my mom to drive across the bay to get him because I’m not so inebriated I can’t drive but not sober enough I’d get in a car with my child.

idk. I’m rambling. Just processing a lot right now and I wish I wasn’t. I really needed spring break. And then A’s daycare was supposed to let him back 6/1, which was great because it gave me a week to do report cards and I could do end of year Zoom parties with my kids. I’m glad I didn’t tell them. Not that it matters because asshat is using the lag in court stuff to his advantage.

 

[shaescott]

Dobs yeah I love cocktails too, but pushing someone to drink when they need to pick up their child later is not okay. They need to understand that A is your priority, and if alcohol interferes with caring for him, it’s alcohol that has to go. You’ve gotta be firm with them, that pushing you to have more is not okay and you won’t let them guilt you anymore.

 

[Flueky88]

Sorry your friends aren't very supportive Dobby. Congrats on your sobriety though!

 

[DobbyForever]

Ty!

Shae, it’s honestly gotten to the point where I don’t hang out with one after dinner and the other I had a CTJ talk. It was one thing before when I was young, dumb, and single. But when I have my kid then that’s not ok. Not that the other is ok.

But I turned down a mimosa yesterday! I was so proud of myself.

Hope everyone is well!

 

[wookie130]

Dobs...yeah, eeeek. Glad you're "changing your playground" [rearranging the friend situation, as they say in AA] in order to maintain your sobriety. Are there any online AA meetings you can attend in your area? They are massively helpful, and I'd recommend anyone give them a chance. Those cliche mottos from AA became cliches, because they're actually true...you really only CAN take it one day at a time. Sometimes it's more like hour by hour.

3 weeks is awesome, and it's worth it for A and for you to keep it up!

 

[DobbyForever]

There probably is. I haven’t looked into it. It’s been madness all month and report cards are due Wed. Everything is a mess with student belongings in the room and I’m being moved! There are FOUR EMPTY ROOMS ON CAMPUS so there is no real need for me to move. My doctor won’t even let me. She says my neck is still too messed up. Which is true. But ugh. It’s so frustrating. Whatever. Not to mention legally he can force me to come to work but all summer of big talk the union isn’t backing me up on it.

I’m not too worried. I’ve always had a do or die attitude. It’s just been you have a goal and failure is not an option. You just make it happen. I think where I failed before was 1) I never actually really embraced that I actually am an alcoholic and have a dependency on drinking, 2) I wasn’t firm in my boundaries with friends and family, and 3) I made concessions like oh I’ll just drink beer or just wine or just two drinks. I realize now that any amount will potentially send me back down that path to overdrinking.

even this week with that mimosa thing, literally same conversation I told my mom I was proud of being 3 weeks sober. Three sentences later, “I want a mimosa. Dee, you love mimosas. Do you want one? Are you sure? Really? It’s just one and you’re with family it’s not like you’re home alone depressed drinking.” Not sure if it was a year because she never ended up making herself one.... but any case it was annoying af. But I’m proud I didn’t because I do love me a mimosas

 

[Flueky88]

Team pink again

 

[kittykat7210]

Congratulations flueks!!!

 

[Flueky88]

Thanks, kit. How are you and baby Josie? Evie love her new sister?

 

[kittykat7210]

We’re okay, Josies eating like a trooper I cannot find a nursing bra in my current size which is awful. I’m currently a 30HH (which equates to a US 30L I think) and that’s after a feed!

evie unhappy and tends to just sit on me/try and remove Josie in order to sit on me which isn’t great! Picture of me feeding Josie whilst Evie also on my lap...

how are you getting on?

 

[Flueky88]

I cannot imagine. Like the biggest I've been is a 40d. Thankful for small boobs (normally a 36c).

I'm glad she's doing well. As for Evie, it is hard especially in the beginning because I find it hard to make time for anything but nursing, sleeping, etc. She'll get bettet adjusted eventually, hang in there

 

[Flueky88]

Oh and I'm doing okay. My body feels much farther in pregnancy than I am but I think it's cause my uterus is pretty big for 16 weeks cause I hadn't gained any weight so far.

 

[DobbyForever]

Congratulations on team pink!

Sorry major headache

 

[shaescott]

Flueks congrats on another girl! That’s so exciting, I’d love to be a girl mom

Kitty yikes I can imagine that’s incredibly hard to find, I thought I had it hard being a 32DD just because bralettes, sports bras, and bikini tops usually only come in S/M/L etc and if it’s big enough in the bust it’s way too loose in the band and vice versa. Definitely feeling thankful for my 32DD now, in comparison. I’m sorry Evie is having a rough time adjusting.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Dobby - Congrats on the sobriety and good for you for standing up to friends and family. Some people really don't get it. But we're all here for you and believe that you can keep it up.

Flueky - Congrats on another girl. I also just found out that an old friend on FB is pg with her 3rd girl. Kinda makes me worried that my next will be the same gender as the first 2. Make sure to send me a bunch of girly dust. lol

kitty - Good to hear that Josie is a happy, hungry little girl. Sorry that Evie isn't adjusting as well though. I'm sure she'll come around soon.

AFM, SO's condo is 100% confirmed sold. So, just gotta wait another 41 days and then we move into our new place.
Been taking daily pg tests. All BFN so far. Also been taking random O tests. Negative for those too. Decent chance I haven't even O'd yet since giving birth and all the tests are a couple months expired. So, doubting I'll be getting any positives any time soon.
Potty training is continuing to go well. Almost no prompting going on and only a handful of accidents. Even had a few dry naps. Still far from being fully trained, but can't really complain.
Otherwise just kinda business as usual over here.

 

[shaescott]

Pretty congrats on selling the condo and on potty training!

AFM my boobs are having a really weird week every day this past week when I take off my bra my boobs HURT. I’ve heard plenty of people say this happens to them daily but I had never personally experienced it until this past week and um I would like a refund on this past week’s boob experience I’m not even PMSing, it started a day after I think I may have ovulated (based on EWCM and high cervix). It’s very weird for me because I always get sore boobs a few days before my period but never any other time (except perhaps a single day one off, never a week straight). So yeah I’m unamused at this new development

 

[kittykat7210]

Pretty congrats on selling the condo and on potty training!

AFM my boobs are having a really weird week every day this past week when I take off my bra my boobs HURT. I’ve heard plenty of people say this happens to them daily but I had never personally experienced it until this past week and um I would like a refund on this past week’s boob experience I’m not even PMSing, it started a day after I think I may have ovulated (based on EWCM and high cervix). It’s very weird for me because I always get sore boobs a few days before my period but never any other time (except perhaps a single day one off, never a week straight). So yeah I’m unamused at this new development

Is it possible you need a different bra size? My boobs did this when I was wearing the wrong size!

 

[shaescott]

Kitty I don’t think so, they’re not spilling out of my Demi cups or giving me double boob. It’s possible I’ve been wearing the band too tight, I did start wearing it on the tightest hook recently but that was because it was getting loose. It definitely doesn’t feel tight I would go try on a larger size but stores are closed and I don’t want to order a bra just to see if I need a size up, ya know? Might still be a good idea but idk. It’s possible they’re just old and too stretched out to be supportive enough? Idk they feel okay. Or maybe I used my pectoral muscles and didn’t realize it and strained them, idk. :/

 

[kittykat7210]

If you have a soft tape measure the Boob or Bust calculator has been spot on for me!