Aw Shae yeah I agree maybe it’s part of the adjustment period. Hopefully things are back to a predictable normal again soon.
Gigs love the convo about four. Immediate thought BUNK BEDS lol. They have some dope a** bunk beds these days. I’m glad that things have turned out ok for now, but seriously love that it has sparked up the convo for the potential future
Sorry I was just so tired. By the time he left and I finished washing my face it was nearly midnight when I normally sleep at 9. I’m so tired lol esp cuz A is back to 2am carry me to the pottying again
re DTD I’m a naughty girl. I made him bring protection but ultimately we didn’t use it. I will get tested but since I’m just sleeping with him then I know whose a** to kick if I get an sti. He insists he doesn’t have one. Tbh I’m more terrified of a pregnancy than an sti. It was ok. The fore play was off the chain cuz I don’t touch certain parts and he did so it was like 0 to 100. I was disappointed in his lack of volunteer to spend some quality time ahem you know where doing you know what esp after I did for 15 minutes. First guy who didn’t do it or even offer. So he lost a lot of cool points off the bat for that. It was good and I don’t regret it but it wasn’t great. He’s much more passive than I’m used to. And leading with the theme, I ahem did all the work until the end. He’s also sooooo quiet, idk if he was worried about my dogs and kid but like dude take a hint. If I’m loud, be loud with me. He did say later that he was trying really hard to not be done in 5m and he felt a lot of pressure to not finish quickly because it had been so long for me. So I mean wasn’t like the best but I’d be willing to do it again and start teaching him what I like as we get more comfortable.
Re the drama so I can NSA. I can do FWB. I can do dating. But you need to pick a lane and stay in it. We were done fooling around at just before ten. He didn’t leave until nearly 11. So what did we do? We talked. We cuddled. We held hands. He kissed me but not sex kisses just you’re adorable kisses. Got to the point where I was like dude I can do the sex but we need boundaries. You can’t sit here and be cute with me because I compartmentalize, so you can’t blur lines like that. Did not stop the cute. Lol. So we keep talking and he’s clearly re-inviting my hand for hand holding, and I’m ignoring him. I mentioned work and everything about him/his demeanor changed. And he vented hard about work and ended his rant with things have just been really hard and I don’t feel like myself/I missed two staff meetings because I’ve just checked out on everything for a week but you know that.... and I’m like oh dip he wasn’t blowing me off. So I told him lol but I also said like when you want to date someone you make time for them. And he’s like yeah for true. And I was like I meant what I said about being a burden. And he’s like you’re not. I love seeing your texts, but I feel bad because I’m not giving you the attention you deserve or I want to give you. I was gonna hit him with the hard truth of there’s only can and won’t but he looked so defeated. So I just dropped it. Kind of like how I dropped his hand
anyway so we talked more, and then he kissed me goodbye and we briefly considered a second round but it was late. He texted when he got home like I asked and then I said cool thx and thx for the wine (my fav varietal cuz he listens) and I’ll save it for next time. And he was like looking forward to it. By which time I had already fallen asleep. I’ll text him back tomorrow because it’s v day, and that’s just awkward.
So that’s the drama. Boy is being too nice. So I guess I’ll promote him to FWB? More on the NSA spectrum. But if we keep boinking and he keeps gazing lovingly in my eyes and holding my hand and being cutesy after we need a serious chat about boundaries.
from out in the hallway 
