General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[Flueky88]

So happy for a line on frer! I'd say tomorrow or Tuesday you should get one on a IC. It usually took a day or so after my super faint frer bfps. How many dpo are you again?

 

[PrettyInInk42]

11dpo. I remember with Matthew, I took my first FRER at 11dpo and I thought it was a BFN.

 

[DobbyForever]

Omggg ahhhh PRETTY CONGRATULATIONS that’s a beautiful line! I’m so excited for you!!!!!!!!! And what a change from two days ago!

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Thanks.

I bought another FRER 2-pack last night, so I'm gonna test again on Tuesday and Thursday. I'm thinking of telling SO on Thursday, but at the same time, he's said in the past that it doesn't really feel real til he can see my belly move. Not gonna wait that long, but still. lol

 

[shaescott]

Just realized I didn’t actually comment but I saw yesterday, congrats Pretty!

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Thanks, shae.

Finally getting a faint line on an IC. Not sure how well it shows up in the pic though. Also, just found out SO's 1st cousin, once removed, and his wife are expecting a girl in January. They already have a boy who's 3 months older than Matthew. Really hoping that'll set the stage for '22 to be the year of girls.
In other news, symptoms so far are tingly/slightly painful boobs, tiredness, and being snippy with the kids. Really trying to be more conscious about increasing my fruit and veg in take and cutting back on sugar. I'm waiting to hear back from my midwife clinic and I'll contact my Dr this week. I feel like it's gonna be a long 36 weeks and I'm gonna be so stressed until I can find the HB with my home doppler.

But anyway, I'm feeling super selfish. How is everyone doing? How's work and the move, shae? How have you and A been, Dobby? Is everyone settling in nicely at the new house, Flueky?

 

[DobbyForever]

Def see the faint line. Excited for you tomorrow’s frer! And not selfish. I don’t have much to say in my life lol. Here’s hoping ‘22 is year of the girl!

so long story short of date was looking for random tinder rebound, this guy had nothing on his profile. Cute. Not hot like last guy but cute. But omg he texts literal paragraphs consistently. Very well spoken/written. Has his graduate degree. Works in hr but has his real estate license and flips houses on the side. He is the first guy to actually ask about A. A was sick the other day, and he sent well wishes three times. He is constantly telling me that he thinks I’m just amazing but also an incredible mom. We went to a yummy udon place then walked around downtown for two hours talking. Kissed goodnight. I could tell he wanted a full on make out sess but he wasn’t aggressive at all. Keep his hands off the booty despite obviously wanting to touch it lol. No spark cuz lol you know me. I only like douches. He immediately asked me out again for next Friday. I said yes but I’m still pining for the last guy. He’s just so attractive and he makes me laugh and I feel so calm with him. I wish I could feel that with this new guy. He’s pretty much perfect, but I also don’t know what his intentions are.

 

[Flueky88]

Pretty yay!. I'm not seeing it on the IC but I know early lines are hard to capture. Looking forward to tomorrow's tests! Ugh, 1st tri is so stressful, I will be sending lots of positive thoughts of a healthy, girl baby for you. Also, with my 3rd, I think I was able to find the heartbeat with doppler during the 8th week. I think uterus expands quicker each pregnancy. Now, it wasn't easy to find, but I did eventually find it and it wasn't consistently found until around 11 or 12 weeks if I remember correctly.

Also, not selfish. We all have things going on in our lives and sometimes we have to focus on ourselves plus I'm always excited about pregnancies and babies.

Dobby, sorry you don't have a spark for this guy. I hope you find the right guy for you that treats you like the queen you are and A like the prince he is.

Shae how is work going? I honestly cannot imagine how difficult it most likely is starting out during a pandemic. Many prayers for our frontline Healthcare workers.


AFM my dad is visiting. He came over on Saturday and we've had a great time so far. Work was super busy last week but I'm off all this week. I had my 1st pp AF at the end of the week before last. Quite sad about the return of AF but I haven't been pumping like I should and she is sleeping through the night. I'm hoping to breastfeed til at least a year but sometimes I just wish to do formula. Eh, will try to keep going for now as I don't really want to do more than supplement from a financial side of things.

 

[DobbyForever]

Ditto Shae! How are you? I'm sending the biggest hugs. I'm struggling at work, and all I can think is holy s* how have our healthcare workers been doing this. I knew y'all were heroes, but damn. Hope things are well and you're enjoying your cohabitation!

Fluek oh golly I hear you on the financial side of formula! They talk about breast milk being liquid gold, but at the price of formula that's also gold! Sorry about the return of af. Definitely a bittersweet moment. But yay for your dad visiting! Glad you're getting to spend time together.

Pretty big hugs. Definitely an exciting time but scary. And yeah it's so interesting when it becomes "real" for for guys vs girls/ different people. But seriously if this is you being selfish, please be selfish. I need more babies in my life lol

I get the sense that this guy would, but definitely something is holding me back. Idk if it's a legit concern or just my disorganized attachment style lol. But I'm not writing him off just yet. He even knows that A has special needs, and when I told him he asked if I ever get burned out and encouraged me to make sure I'm taking care of myself/ what it was like as a parent. Then promptly reminded me that I'm a bada** mom for my parenting style/overcoming my trauma with the ex/being a boss at life. If anything, boy is good for my ego He says that he ultimately wants to get married and have kids, but he won't do it unless it's with the right person. Until then, he's open-minded. Which i've heard a thousand times. And he is very clearly sexually attracted to me, so I'm gonna make him wait hahah. I feel like once you hit a month of no sex, their intentions get real clear real fast.

Forgot to add that A's first evaluation for SPED preschool is next week. So far, the daycare hasn't said anything about the transition other than he obviously misses his old teacher. I have a meeting next week with his ABA people, so they'll give me a rundown of his behavior since the official move to preschool.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Flueky - Hmm, good to know about finding the HB at 8 weeks. I probably have a few more layers of fat than you, but I'll give it a try. lol. I remember the doppler being delivered when I was 11w4d with Alex and I found the HB, no prob. Can't remember with Matthew though. Either way, never hurts to try. Glad to hear you're having a nice visit with your dad and taht you have this week off to enjoy him. Sorry about AF though. Do you think even though it's back you'll actually go for longer between periods cuz you are still BFing? I'm also aiming to make it a full year this time around. I went 10.5 months with and 8 months with Matthew.

Dobby - He really does sound like a good guy. The fact that you don't feel sparks may mean he actually IS pretty decent and I'd say give him a chance, for sure. Maybe you'll eventually find out he's amazing at DTD and then you'll be more into him. lol. But for now, definitely let him stroke your ego and give you the attention you deserve.

AFM, just puttering around the house today. Laundry, dishes, planning meals for the week and Alex's school lunches. As well as lunches for myself cuz I guess I gotta start eating on a regular basis. No more intermittent fasting for now. lol. I can't tell you how many times I've checked that FRER from yesterday. Can't wait for tomorrow. Also can't wait to tell a couple friends. One of my friends (known her since middle school and have become super close recently cuz her son is 3.5 months younger than Matthew) just asked me on Saturday how the baby making is going and I said I hadn't tested yet. I feel a wee bit bad lying, but I feel like SO should know first, apart from you ladies. lol

 

[shaescott]

Dobs hm the guy sounds interesting, my preliminary thought is good vibes, we’ll see how he deals with not getting sex. He’s either being super great to get in your pants or because he’s actually super great.

Flueks sorry about AF coming back

AFM I’m doing pretty good. Work has been slightly overwhelming some days but I’m getting there. The move went smoothly and so far things are going pretty well. SO is super sweet and has been making me coffee in the morning before work. The first few days we argued a bit but we’re doing pretty well, I think it was just stress.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

shae - Happy to hear cohabitation is treating you well.

Today's tests :

 

[Flueky88]

Beautiful line of that frer!!! Also, I agree that apart from bnb, SO should know 1st. So happy and excited for you.

Shae that's good that things are better. It really is stressful being a nurse. I feel even more so starting out and during a pandemic no less. Stress can definitely make me q bit more snippy. I try to communicate better and have been making some improvements.

Dobby well if he is the one, I hope that your spark gets lit. Also hoping As meeting next week goes well.

 

[WinterBub]

Hi ladies!

Hopefully this isn't weird... But I just wanted to pop in and say hello. I used to read along to your thread a couple of years ago. Didn't have the stones to sign up for my own account until now. You all seem like such a lovely group, and I'd love to stop by if you're accepting new posters.

Im feeling a bit lost and found myself back looking at B&B after a rough few weeks. I had a natural MC earlier this year and am currently going through a missed miscarriage. No idea what is going on, and have nobody in real life to talk to about any of this. I was told when I was younger that I had pcos, but had no issue falling pregnant with my 2yo. So just totally wasn't expecting any of what has happened this year. I thought 2020 sucked... But 2021 has been a doozy.

I was wondering... What happened to the OP? Did she just stop posting? Quite amazing to think how long some of you have been chatting on here.

I just read the last few pages before posting and wanted to add massive congratulations to you, Pretty!

 

[shaescott]

Hi Winterbub! I’m so sorry for your losses I would recommend talking to your doctor, especially if you have another loss. Recurrent losses can be a sign that something isn’t quite right with your hormones or your reproductive system in general.

The OP has been posting a lot on her YouTube channel so I know she’s doing fine but she hasn’t posted on here in a while.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Hi, WinterBub.
Anyone is welcome to post. The more, the merrier. So sorry for your recent losses. I went through a MMC late in '18 and it sucked. But we're here for you if you need to vent and some kind words. Are you actively TTC or just NTNP cuz of PCOS? And thank you! I'm pretty excited, but obviously nervous cuz it's 1st tri.

AFM, I dropped my phone this morning and the screen is totally not working. So, I'll be taking it to one of those screen fixer places and hopefully it's not beyond repair. FML. -.-
But at least my IC this morning was a bit darker. Obviously don't have a pic to post, but ya, still hoping to tell SO tomorrow.

 

[DobbyForever]

I CANNOT make this s* up. New guy calls me because his ex wants to get back together. Like he proposed a year ago and she said no so they broke up, but now she suddenly changed her mind. Aka she saw what it’s like to be single and came crawling back. And I’m like if there’s any question in your mind then you have to see that through but come the f* on REALLY I’m so over dating

will catch up on posts when I put A to bed

 

[WinterBub]

Thank you, Shae and Pretty. I asked my friend today to recommend her Reproductive Endocrinologist. I've fallen pregnant twice in 6 months, so it clearly isn't the falling pregnant part that's my problem. I just feel like something is now not quite right and my body isn't supporting the pregnancy. Miscarriage is brutal, and the missed miscarriage even more so as I was blissfully unaware there was a problem. My OB's advice was to just try again and see what happens. Of all my options, that seems the least appealing. I'd like to get at least some things checked out before considering diving in again.

Glad to hear that the OP is doing well, and just moved on from B&B, I guess! I used to more search and peruse "is this normal in pregnancy?" "Why is my baby doing this?" type stuff on here. It seems like forums in general are less of a thing than they once were (reddit aside). I see you've got a WTT journal, Shae. What's your plan? Do you have an official "go time" date?

I know it was a long time ago now, Pretty... But sorry for your MMC, too. Lovely to see you have your boys and a new baby on the way too i'm not entirely sure I have PCOS. I was told I did when I was 20, but that was with some minimal blood test and then they stuck me on the pill. I stopped taking that after a few years and had zero problems until now. We were more or less actively trying. Path forward TBD. Was today the day that you were telling your OH? I'm very happy to have joined in when there's a new baby and all the excitement to get into!

Sorry about the date and his ex, Dobby. I'd be pretty irked too! I wonder if she knew he was dating? Certainly smacks of her not wanting him until maybe somebody else does. Nothing should be hard work early on, so hopefully if you step back things will work out as they should. Annoying for sure.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Could it be an issue with the fetus as opposed to your body being unable to stay pg? Clearly you and your partner are able to conceive viable babies and you can carry a pregnancy to term. Maybe you've just been unlucky with your last 2 pregnancies? Either way, I hope you get some definite answers and are successful going forward.

And thanks for your condolences. All MCs suck, but mine was super crappy cuz I found out literally the day before we left for a vacation. And I actually passed the tissue while we were away. On the bright side, at least I knew before we left. If I just started bleeding without warning in another country, I would have freaked out. And then literally 2 months later, I got a BFP that would become my 2nd baby. So, definitely the rainbow after a storm there.

I'm aiming to tell SO tomorrow (the 9th). Back story: When I told him about my last 2 pregnancies, we were out for dinners that I was gonna pay for. The last time, he made some crack about being suspicious if I offer to pay for dinner again. So, my plan was to pick up take out for dinner without telling him and then be like "So, this is dinner... that I paid for... you know what that means..." and then present him with my most recent FRER. If my phone can't be fixed for whatever reason, I dunno how I'm gonna pull this off and still have it be a surprise. Best case scenario, I pick up my fixed phone after work and place an order immediately. Worst case, I have to go home and order with his phone and only the meal won't be a surprise. Sorry, I overthink things and plan like crazy. lol

In other news, over the past few months, I've been sporadically asking my 4yo if he wants a new baby, specifically a baby sister. His answers have been kinda mixed. But this week, he's brought it up 3 times on his own, saying he wants to hold a baby sister and feed her Cheerios, etc. So cute and I'm hoping it's another sign of things to come.

Dobby - That sounds like some Regina George/Mean Girls BS. Did he say he was gonna give it another go with her?

 

[Flueky88]

Pretty sorry about the phone. Hope it's fixed quickly. I hope you can pull your surprise off to SO too. So cute about A's response about a baby sister.

Dobby oh man, that's not good. I dated a pharmacist that was still hung up on his ex. They had only broken up because he wanted kids and she didn't. We broke up and they got back together.

Winter up, sorry about your losses. I hope that you conceive your rainbow baby soon. I'm also sorry your OB was less than helpful. My obgyn wasn't concerned when it we had gotten to a year of trying for my 1st because my cycles were long and irregular initially when I stopped bcp. It kind of sucked feeling unheard. She did end up offering my DH doing a SA but he wasn't ready for testing either.